Dealing With My Grief

As I reflect on Father's day, there are a few things that make me angry about my father's loss:

1. I didn't get a chance to say goodbye.

2. I didn't get a chance to "hang out" at father-son event's during high school

3. My son will never have a relationship with his grandfather

4. I simply didn't have enough time of my own with my father.

I'm still trying to deal with these angry feelings i Have, but I haven't really discovered the best way to do so.

Please rate and review in iTunes - Thanks!

Contact me using any of following: email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

There was no episode last week.

I had an emergency eye procedure that Monday - the regular day I record the show and Tuesday was my son's high school graduation. With family in town and trying to recover health wise. I just couldn't find/make time to record the show.

Now on the this week's episode...

As mentioned earlier, my son graduated from high school this week and this Sunday is Father's Day (June 19th). I wanted to reflect on how my grief affects my ability to appreciate/celebrate holidays and life's milestones.

Please rate and review in iTunes - Thanks!

Contact me using any of following: email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com

Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

How do we interpret things people say while grieving? To grievers, a lot of things that people say to be comforting may not be comforting at all:

"I'm sorry for your loss" "Your loved one is in a better place"

But as grievers, is there anything that we say, that can seem insensitive?

Click here to rate and review in iTunes.

Contact me using any of following:

email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

The only cure for grief is action - George Henry Lewes

This is really the third in a series of episodes that discusses this topic. I was just able to find a quote that perfectly sums it up! The other episodes are 15 and 17.

I have found that staying busy - being active, is the main way that I keep my grief from totally consuming me. I think I learned this from my mother because she had to get busy right away in making sure that she had a job so she could put food on the table and make sure she could pay the rest of the bills.

Please, please, please rate and review the show in iTunes: they don't make it easy - you have to search for "Dealing With My Grief" in the Podcast app, then click the podcast link at the bottom of the results page - then you'll see the button to rate or review the show. Thanks, I really appreciate it!! Thanks for taking the time to listen.

More on George Henry Lewes.

Contact me using any of following:

email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

Sorry this episode is a day late, but this virus that has been going around has been kicking my butt... I finally found 25 minutes or so when I wasn't coughing to finish this episode...

At some point after your loss, you have to begin to move forward - this means you have to begin to re-establish some routine in your life. That could be going back to school or work, or getting back into the workforce after not working for a very long time. Maybe its getting back into a hobby.

What I have learned is that life goes on after loss. I learned this from my mother. She never once wavered from her stance that we would be OK and we would make it through our tragedy. This doesn't mean that we weren't sad or still grieving, it just meant that she had to do what she needed to do to assume becoming the head of the household.

You can still grieve, but at some point we must learn how to move forward

Contact me using any of following:

email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

One of my best friends just lost his wife unexpectedly.

I often ask myself what I can do to help those who are grieving. I tend not to to the cliche things such as food and flowers. Sometimes the best thing that I can offer is a listening ear.

Contact me using any of following:

email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

Shortly after my father died, I was introduced to the game of chess. Any one who knows me, knows that I am passionate about this game... but they may not know why.

It is through playing chess that I was able to connect with friends of my father and learn more about the man that he was. It also provided me some "me" time away from my friends

This brings me some sense of comfort.

Contact me using any of following:

email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

After the death on my father, my grandfather would become the central male figure in my life.

He would be diagnosed with diabetes and later cancer and I would take great pride in helping to care for him. When it was time for me to head off to college, I would decide to head to the east coast - against my grandfather's wishes.

We would have the only argument ever to take place between us and I would wait to late to make amends. Before I could return home to talk to him in person, he would be gone.

What did I learn from this experience?

Contact me using any of following:

email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.com Music provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])

The week and a half between April 14 - April 25 is a very painful and often stressful time for me:

My father's birthday is April 14. He would be 81 this year

My father died on April 24. This marks the 38 anniversary of his death.

May parents wedding anniversary is April 25. This year marks their 52nd anniversary.

In an attempt to keep things from getting totally out of hand, I try to remember some good times with my father... which does bring me some joy and comfort.

Link to Hawaii Five-0 original theme song - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AepyGm9Me6w

Contact me using the following:

John Lennon was shot and killed in 1980, This was the first time I'd heard of the term "gun control." After President Ronald Reagan was shot, it became a nation issue in the United States.Why was gun control not so important when my father was killed?Do people believe that their social standing shield them from grief and tragedy?I don't believe grief considers who you are when it decides to strike. I can be contacted by: email - [email protected] twitter - http://www.twitter.com/dealwithgrief web - http:// www.dealingwithmygrief.comMusic provided by Oren Levine ([email protected])