In this episode of "Death And," mortician Victor M. Sweeney sits down with certified Yoga Therapist Baxter Bell to explore the concept of healthspan and how it intersects with our experience of death and aging. Victor admits that "healthspan" was a new term for him, but quickly connects it to his daily work with the realities of lifespan and mortality. Dr. Bell, who transitioned from family medicine to practicing and teaching yoga, shares how proactive lifestyle choices—like yoga and mindfulness—can extend our years of good health and reduce time spent in illness. The conversation winds through personal stories, the privilege of caring for loved ones at the end of life, and the ways in which facing mortality (even through pre-planning a funeral) can actually alleviate stress and boost well-being. Together, they discuss the inevitability of suffering but also how our mindset, daily rituals, and a holistic approach to health can make those hard times more meaningful.

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https://www.shambhala.com/authors/a-f/baxter-bell/yoga-for-healthy-aging-15028.html

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In this episode of "Death And," undertaker and mortician Victor M. Sweeney is joined by physician and writer, Dr. Lucy Kalanithi. The conversation centers around Lucy Kalanithi's experience as a widow to Dr. Paul Kalanithi, author of When Breath Becomes Air, and what it was like to help bring his memoir to life during his final days. Together, they reflect on caring for a loved one at the end of life, parenting through loss, and the delicate balance between honoring someone’s memory while not turning them into a myth. Lucy Kalanithi shares insights on grief, raising her daughter without Paul, and how the realities of death can sit side by side with moments of humor and celebration. The episode also touches on topics like the practicalities of funerals, the importance of talking openly about those we’ve lost, and how love and presence can endure in unexpected ways.

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https://www.powells.com/book/when-breath-becomes-air-9780812988406?condition=Used%20-%20Good

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In this monologue episode of "Death And," mortician and funeral director Victor M. Sweeney explores the theme of death and fear, inviting listeners to reflect on their own anxieties around mortality and the grieving process. Victor shares personal stories from his life and career, demystifying the fear people often have about being near the dead and the unfamiliar rituals of funerals. He talks about how children naturally approach death with curiosity, and how adults might benefit from adopting a similar openness instead of avoidance. Victor emphasizes the power of permission—encouraging listeners to stay present in difficult moments, touch their loved ones goodbye, and let themselves experience grief without shame or fear. The episode offers a compassionate guide through the unknown, reassuring listeners that it’s okay to ask questions, feel uneasy, and seek support when facing loss.

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In this episode of "Death And," mortician and funeral director Victor M. Sweeney sits down with Paige Pederson, a certified midwife from Grand Forks, North Dakota, to explore the fascinating overlap between death and the practice of midwifery. The conversation reveals how both professions, though on seemingly opposite ends of life, revolve around being present with families in moments of profound transition—birth and death. Paige opens up about the hands-on, relationship-based nature of her work, caring for women from conception through postpartum and valuing the trust that develops along the way. Victor shares parallels from funeral service, including the importance of simply sitting with families and allowing space for grief and healing.

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In this episode of "Death And," mortician and funeral director Victor M. Sweeney sits down with Dr. Tony Cicoria, an orthopedic surgeon who shares his remarkable near death experience after being struck by lightning. The conversation centers on Tony’s experience of dying, and what it means to come back, fundamentally changed…touching on the spiritual, medical, and personal impact of such an event. Dr. Cicoria recounts leaving his body, observing his own resuscitation, and experiencing a profound sense of peace and love, which then led to an unexpected affinity for classical music, a new skill he didn’t have prior, and a transformation in how he relates to others through his medical practice. Together, they explore the deeper questions of spirituality, the nature of consciousness, and how moments at the edge of life can inspire lasting change.

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https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6179476/

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2007/07/23/a-bolt-from-the-blue

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In this episode of "Death And," mortician and funeral director Victor M. Sweeney sits down with writer and producer Jessica Alpert to delve into the deep and spiritual tradition of ritual washing in Jewish death customs. The theme centers on Tahara, the ancient practice performed by volunteers in a Hevra Kadisha, where the deceased are lovingly washed, purified, and dressed in shrouds before burial. Jessica shares how this collective act is more than just practical—it’s an act of forgiveness, love, and community, emphasizing its importance for both the deceased and for those participating. Victor reflects on the differences and unexpected similarities between his own, more clinical style of preparing the dead, and the spiritual meaning behind Tahara, exploring how the physical act of preparing a body can become a true act of loving kindness.

Links and Resources

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https://www.instagram.com/jalpertsilber

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https://jessicaalpert.substack.com/

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/03/17/well/mind/surviving-heart-surgery.html

https://www.hevrakadisha.org/


https://kavodvnichum.org/

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In this episode of "Death And," funeral director Victor M. Sweeney sits down with David Berg to explore the theme of death and attitude. Dave, who has a terminal diagnosis of pancreatic cancer, opens up about how his perspective on life and relationships has shifted since receiving the news. The discussion covers the realities of cancer treatment, the importance of emotional tenderness in facing the end, and the bittersweet moments with family that become more precious. Together, Victor and Dave reflect on the value of living well even as the end approaches, share practical insights about planning for death, and even find comfort in "ice cream therapy" as a bright spot in challenging times.

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In this episode of "Death And," mortician and funeral director Victor M. Sweeney explores the theme of "death and balance," reflecting on the unique challenges that come with working in the death care profession. Victor answers thoughtful listener questions about coping with emotionally heavy cases, the evolving nature of funeral services, and how to maintain a sense of normalcy and connection outside of work. He shares deeply personal stories—from embalming a child close in age to his own son, to the small but significant ways he tries to stay present for his family despite the job’s constant demands. The discussion highlights the idea that compassion and shared inconvenience are at the heart of both grief work and relationships, showing how embracing discomfort can deepen our capacity for love.

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In this episode of "Death And," funeral director Victor M. Sweeney sits down with guest James Marck, Director of Music at St. Francis de Sales Oratory, to explore the rich tradition of the New Orleans jazz funeral. The conversation covers how music at funerals has evolved—from somber Gregorian chant to the lively second line parades unique to New Orleans—and why singing and ceremony have been central to grieving across cultures and faiths. James shares his expertise in sacred music and explains how traditions like the jazz funeral balance mourning with celebration, and how even secular approaches to death struggle to find meaningful responses. Together, they reflect on the contrast of sorrow and joy at funerals, noting that the highs and lows are both essential for healing and remembrance. For anyone curious about how music, ritual, and culture weave together at life’s end, this episode is full of surprising insights and heartfelt stories.

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In this episode of "Death And," mortician and funeral director Victor M. Sweeney sits down with Susan Barsky Reid, psychotherapist and the mother of Death Cafe founder Jon Underwood, to talk about the worldwide Death Cafe movement. The conversation centers on how gathering to openly discuss death—with no agenda, prompts, or products to sell—can be both healing and surprisingly joyful. Susan shares the origin story of Death Cafe, its grounding principles, and how her own family’s personal experiences with unexpected loss have shaped her involvement. Victor and Susan swap stories about the intimacy of talking about death, how laughter often emerges in these spaces, and why facing mortality head-on can help make life richer. It's an honest and moving look at how simple conversations over coffee and cake can break down taboos and bring people together.

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