When does decorum keep us civil-- and when does it keep us silent?

From courtroom etiquette to the Oval Office, from department meetings to NFL sidelines, decorum shapes our public interactions—but who gets to decide what counts as “proper” behavior? In this episode of Hotel Bar Sessions, Rick, Leigh, and Devonya take on the contested role of decorum in social and political life. Is it a necessary lubricant for peaceful coexistence, or a tool for policing and silencing dissent?

The hosts explore decorum’s history, its role in institutions like Congress and the courts, and its power to both reinforce and resist social hierarchies. From Colin Kaepernick’s kneeling protest to Zelensky’s wartime wardrobe, the conversation turns to moments when violating expectations becomes an act of defiance. Does focusing on breaches of decorum distract from deeper moral and political failures? And if we abandon the language of decorum, what do we lose—or gain?

With their signature mix of philosophical insight and barroom banter, the hosts wrestle with the real stakes of politeness, propriety, and protest.

Full episode notes available at this link:
https://hotelbarpodcast.com/podcast/episode-174-decorum

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