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Losing a parent is hard. It can feel like losing a part of yourself, leaving a space that will never be filled… or so it seems. In this episode of Dem Bois Podcast, I share my experience with the death of my chosen mother. While her health was in decline, my birth mother’s behavior toward me completely shifted. It felt like that motherly love just flowed. 

I haven’t recorded a solo episode in almost a year and in this episode I discuss that too. But, this topic weighed heavily on my heart, so I hope you enjoy it.

I talk:
A quick rundown of solo episodes from season 1 - 2:32
Things I learned from my birth mother - 7:41
Sharing the podcast with my family - 20:36
My birth mother’s shift in behavior - 29:54
How I met my chosen mother - 39:34
Being at peace with the passing of my chosen mother - 50:16

Click here for transcript!

Read more about Shawn in his bio below:
Shawn Aaron is the Founder and Executive Director of Dem Bois Inc. Shawn is a strong believer that trans men of color should have access to gender-affirming care and surgeries regardless of their economical status. Shawn is passionate about addressing intersectionality when it comes to one’s gender identity and access to non-bias healthcare. Shawn identifies as trans-masculine and understands the importance of accessing transition related care. 

“I podcast to share stories and experiences of gender expansive leaders within my community. This allows me to build connections across different communities of color and people spanning multiple generations. From the rising generation of queer and trans folks of colors to the elders who paved the way for me and others. There are few storytellers that document the lives of trans men of color. As the host and creator of the Dem Bois Podcast, it is imperative that I continue to amplify and highlight the lives of trans men of color. Visibility = PossibilityTM

Through my storytelling, I demonstrate that:
- Trans lives are not monolithic. 
- Trans men of color have always existed in society. 
- Trans men of color elders exist and represent possibility for the next generation. 
- Young trans men of color now have a point of reference of what they can become since our stories are often underrepresented.”  

Connect with Shawn

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

Imagine being unhoused at a young age, disowned by your family because of who you are. Imagine having to stay indoors all day and all night because if you leave your home you could be imprisoned for life. In another Dem Bois Podcast first, today’s guest, Ruthra Lubega doesn’t have to imagine any of these things. Ruthra is an HIV/AIDS and executive director of Positive People Initiative Uganda, and in this episode we talk about what it’s like for trans and gender non-coforming folks living there.

We talk:
Being disowned by your parents at a young age - 5:23
Contracting HIV - 14:32
Ruthra’s belief in God - 22:36
Building community with like-minded people - 28:15
Ruthra’s number one fear - 32:55

Click here for transcript!

Read more about our guest in their bio below:
Ruthra Lubega Is an HIV activist who has lived with HIV/AIDS for the past 12 years and advocates for the rights of HIV positive persons, more so the trans gender persons and gender non conforming persons. Ruthra is the Executive Director of Positive People Initiative Uganda an organization that supports people living with HIV/AIDS in Uganda. Ruthra operates a transitional shelter that provides a diverse space for marginalized persons to socialize and also provides a robust advocate journey for shelter inclusion for people living with HIV/AIDS.

• https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100064311236900
•  https://instagram.com/positive.transug?igshid=NzZlODBkYWE4Ng==
•  https://instagram.com/ruth_lubega
• https://twitter.com/ruth_lubega?t=sCJBIYkhCHNTQlnx0UYCEg&s=08

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

Transitioning shouldn’t be for anyone else but yourself. It’s not about the person you’re in a relationship with. It’s not about your parents. It’s not about your children. It’s about you taking charge of your life and being your authentic self. That is the message I want you to take from this episode of Dem Bois Podcast! Today I sit down with Cameron Bostic and he shares about how his life mentally prepared him for his transition.

We talk:
Cameron’s transition journey - 5:43
Advice for mentally preparing to transition - 17:29
His relationship before and after his transition - 25:20
Cameron’s career as a DJ - 34:40
Last bit of advice for listeners - 44:21

Click here for transcript!

References
The Aggressives
Dem Bois Podcast Ep. 3 - Surviving Homelessness

Read more about our guest in his bio below:
I am a transman dj, living in South Florida. I am also an ambassador for the South Florida black pride organization.

• www.instagram.com/djladieslovecam

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

Moving to a new city can be challenging. And, moving to a new city where no one like you really exists, that’s damn-near impossible. But today’s guest, Mia Obiekwe overcame that challenge and rediscovered themself in the process. Mia is a veteran, activist, model, and drag king, and in this episode of Dem Bois Podcast, we talk about all of those things. They also give advice for trans masc folks who are looking for support.

We talk:
Mia’s transition journey - 8:25
Their genderqueer identity - 18:51
Mia’s hope for Black queer people to be authentic - 25:59
Their former business and why it ended - 35:39
Rediscovering themself in a new environment - 41:44
What Mia’s support system looks like - 50:55

Click here for transcript!

References
them magazine
RuPaul’s Drag Race
Dem Bois Podcast Ep. 6 Transforming Your Mindset with Zeke Williams

Read more about our guest in their bio below: 
Mia-Obie is a trans masculine individual from Cincinnati, Ohio. They Spent most of their adult life in Atlanta, GA where they learned to hustle as a business owner in the cleaning industry. Within the past year they recently moved to Santa Fe, NM where they have had to rediscover themself in an environment where black trans people don't really exist, as well as, grieving the closure of their cleaning business. 

• https://www.instagram.com/miaobie.benbanjee

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

How do we learn gender roles? They are taught to us by society, our families, our teachers, our peers, our bosses, etc. They tell us who we are supposed to be and how we should behave. But we get to decide who we are and who we will become. In this episode of Dem Bois Podcast, my guest Father Venus shares how his gender journey sparked his artistic journey and how he incorporates the two.

We talk:
Father Venus’ love for being an Aries - 8:40
His career change because of his transition - 22:32
Message to former students - 32:59
Incorporating gender within artistry - 45:13
His goal with his music and business - 55:44

Click here for transcript!

References
Pilot Frixion Pens
Saturn Says Studios
Dem Bois Podcast, Ep. 7 - Transitioning at Work
Alexes Hazen, M.D.
Callen-Lorde Community Health Center, Brooklyn

Read more about our guest in his bio below:
Father Venus is an artist who centers pleasure, justice, and magic through hip-hop music & visuals. Born & raised in Harlem, NY they now reside in Detroit where they independently craft their own style of hip-hop from their home base, Saturn Says Studios--AN ARTIST-OWNED PRODUCTION HOUSE & CREATIVE COMMUNITY FOR AND BY BLACK + BROWN, TRANS + QUEER ARTISTS, CREATIVES, AND ENTREPRENEURS. 

• https://www.saturnsays.com
• https://www.instagram.com/fathervenusmusic
• https://beacons.ai/fathervenus

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

It’s true. Your transition never really ends. As you age, grow, and learn, you will continue to transform and transition. In this episode of Dem Bois Podcast I had the privilege to sit down with actor, writer, producer, and editor, Shaan Dasani. Shaan discusses his career and how his Trans identity is integrated into his work. He also shares some advice for Trans actors. There are just so many good topics within this episode so I hope you enjoy it!

We talk:
How the name Shaan chose him - 7:01
Cultural narratives in having sons vs daughters - 14:15
Acceptance from grandparents - 22:29
How Shaan’s Trans identity is integrated into his work - 34:51
Advice for Trans actors - 51:34

Click here for transcript!

References
Agents of Change Film
Ep. #33 Why It's Important For Us to Tell Our Own Stories with D’Lo
UN Climate Change Conference - United Arab Emirates
OTV

Read more about our guest in his bio below:
Shaan Dasani is a multifaceted actor, writer, producer & director. With an MFA in Film Production from Chapman University, he has produced over 30 short films and music videos. As an actor, he has starred in commercials for Google, Uber, and on TV in shows like Criminal Minds and Fox’s 9-1-1. His current penned project in which he also stars - AGENTS OF CHANGE - is a spy genre film about secret agents who fight environmental crime and showcases a queer and trans cast in a film that goes beyond identity to address broader social and political issues of our time.

• https://instagram.com/shaandasani
• https://instagram.com/agentsofchangemovie 
• https://www.ShaanDasani.com

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

“The parent’s role is to guide and to nourish. Not to dictate or tell them how they should be, how they [should] live their life.” - Gabriel Vidal

This quote really sets the tone for what you can expect in this episode of Dem Bois Podcast. This episode’s guest is one of my favorite people and once you hear the interview you will see why. Gabe is the Director of Youth Organizing for the GSA (Gender/Sexuality Alliance). He is also a Queer and Trans DJ. And, I am so excited to introduce you to him in this episode of Dem Bois Podcast.

We talk:
Gabe’s transition journey - 7:31
How he experimented with gender identity - 13:07
Having parents who are allies - 24:53
Advice for queer youth without that strong foundation - 30:43
Advice for parents of queer youth - 35:57
Music as a creative outlet - 43:59

Click here for transcript!

References
Gender/Sexuality Alliance

Read more about our guest in his bio below:
Gabriel (he/him/Gabe) is a queer trans DJ, record collector and community organizer born and raised in Los Angeles. His approach to music has been shaped by his family, community organizing and underground music communities. Collecting records has been an outlet of his own transformation and a way to celebrate the experiences of his communities and others. Additionally, Gabriel is the Director of Youth Organizing for Genders & Sexualities Alliance Network and spends his extra free time DJing in local venues and community events in the Los Angeles area. 

• https://mixcloud.com/gfunktrece
• https://www.instagram.com/gfunktrece

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

If you know anything about the podcast, then you know that we are all about amplifying trans voices, so today we have another Dem Bois Podcast first. This episode won’t only be hosted by me. It will also be co-hosted by Vee Martin, and we will be interviewing our guest Ray Adens. I interviewed Vee back in season one and we had a great conversation about building confidence, going to therapy, and transitioning with children. In this episode, Vee is back and Ray is ready to share. We discuss family, mental health, battling with faith, and much more!

We talk:
Ray’s transition journey - 7:10
His faith - 15:26
Getting back in touch with his mom - 28:51
Learning to be a man without a “father-figure” - 37:07
Being kind and polite - 46:23
Bromance and competition - 50:44

Click here for transcript!

References
Ep. 11 - Building Confidence to Become Your True Self with Vee Martin
Ep. 14 - Discovering New Life Through Grief and Healing with Mely Anais Quiroz

Read more about our guest and co-host in their bios below:

Ray - Humble in heart, wise in response (motto)

Vee - Vee is a father, husband, friend and overall a simple family man. He is on a journey of self love, understanding and exploring what his future holds.

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

Today we have another Dem Bois Podcast First! In this episode, my guest TJ Jourian shares a difficult time in his life where he had to revert back to his previous gender and how that affected his mental health. And, I want to give an emotional warning, because we do discuss suicide ideation. We also discuss masculinity, being trans identified vs. being a man, cultivating healthy higher education environments, and much more!

We talk:
TJ’s transition journey - 5:48
How his family accepts his identity now - 15:50
How reverting back to his previous gender affected his mental health - 24:42
TJ’s higher education and how he navigated those spaces - 34:47
The importance of community in higher education -  47:10
How you can work with TJ - 54:12

Click here for transcription!

References
Boys Don’t Cry (movie)
Brown Boi Project
Emergent Strategy by adrienne marie brown

Read more about our guest in his bio below:

T.J. Jourian is a scholar, consultant, and coach with Trans*Formational Change. He helps changemakers – diversity workers, activists, creatives, scholars, and leaders – reclaim and transform their energy, as they transform the world. T.J. partners with colleges, companies, conferences, and community-based organizations across Turtle Island in their efforts towards equity and inclusion. His research examines race, gender, and sexuality in higher education; masculinity, transness, and racialization; and campus gender and sexuality practitioners. T.J. has published extensively, including the co-edited books Queerness as Being in Higher Education: and Queerness as Doing in Higher Education: Narrating the Insider/Outsider Paradox as LGBTQ+ Scholars and Practitioners.

• http://www.tjjourian.net/
• https://www.instagram.com/tjjourian/
• https://twitter.com/tjjourian
• https://www.linkedin.com/in/tjjourian/

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!

Send us Fan Mail

There are so many people out there who aren’t getting the care they need or deserve, especially trans people. We are met with ignorance and incompetence, and today’s guest, Dr. Julius Weaver wants to change that! Dr. Julius is a board-certified family physician who has been practicing for 20+ years and they are promoting Black and trans visibility through their medical expertise. In this episode of Dem Bois Podcast, we discuss transitioning late in life, being stealth vs. being visible, transitioning with children, and much more.

We talk:
How the name Julius chose him - 2:55
His relationship with his ex-husband now - 9:44
Advice to trans parents navigating societal norms - 20:36
Transitioning while working in the medical field - 30:24
Being a doctor and providing that competent care to trans folks - 39:16
Where the name “Dem Bois” came from - 48:00

Click here for transcript!

Read more about our guest in their bio below:

Dr. Julius Weaver (he/they) is a black transgender board-certified family physician who has been practicing for over 20+ years. Julius is a busy, protective mother of three teens and in their downtime enjoys sports, gardening and being by any picturesque body of water they can find.  

Dr Weaver recently started their most exciting venture, RMD Proud. RMD Proud is a direct pay, virtual, gender affirming care program for transgender and gender-diverse individuals. 

Julius Weaver is a late blooming non-binary trans guy. Their gender journey has certainly been lifelong but he started socially transitioning when he came out a few years ago to his family. 

Currently, Julius loves to promote black and trans visibility through their own medical expertise and also by talking about their personal transition journey. 

• http://www.resolvemd.org/gender-care
• http://www.instagram.com/thetransmd
• http://www.instagram.com/rmd_proud

Celebrate 10 years of Dem Bois Inc.!

2026 marks ten years of Dem Bois Inc. To honor this milestone, we invite you to join our 10 for 10 campaign by giving $10 a month to help sustain the care, leadership, and visibility that trans men of color deserve.

Your support helps build a future rooted in care, visibility, and possibility.

Donate today!

Donate today to support Transmasc Gender Affirming Grants and Community Wellness Packages for Trans Men of Color!

The  Visibility = Possibility™️ Merch is here! - Not just merch, but a movement! 

Dem Bois Community Voices Facebook Group is a safe, moderated sanctuary where trans men of color can connect authentically, discuss podcast episodes, share powerful experiences, and build support networks. 

Dem Bois YouTube Channel! - @demboisinc - Exclusive content you won't find anywhere else!