Dewey's Ditties

Yesterday my boss called me off the line

Knew I had a CDL years ago

Said he could make me rich if I got back into trucking

Hauling parts from coast to coast

But before the last words of the offer left his lips

I just shook my head and told him how it is

I DON'T ROLL

In my rock-solid home

Gotta a beautiful wife and happy kids to hold

I'm covered in love like moss on a sedentary stone

I DON'T ROLL

I've gotta lotta single friends who say a family like mine

Would only slow 'em down

I read between the lines on the postcards they send

They can't believe I'm stuck in the same town

Oh, I pray someday they'll get tired of living the fast life

And sooner than later they'll see the reasons why...

REPEAT CHORUS

I meant every word in that little white church

From 'with this ring' to "I do"

I chocked my wheels right then and there

My roaming days were through

REPEAT CHORUS

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

©BMI - 2024

"I wonder how this beer got to this bar?” said no one ever

But if it didn't there'd be one less place for friends to gather

No matter how you drink it

From a bottle, can, or glass

Without guys like me the neon party wouldn't last...I'm...

ALCOHAULIN’

Ice cold beer to your favorite bar in town

ALCOHAULIN’

In a reefer eighteen wheeler hammer down

Bartenders get the thanks and tips

For quenching all the thirsty lips

But truckers keep the whole wide world pub-crawlin'

ALCOHAULIN’

I'm up before the sun loading brew-filled kegs and cases

Then cruise the highways to the driveways of your local drinkin' places

But before the parking lights turn on

I'll be back in my hometown

On a barstool for a cold one but when morning rolls around...I'm...

REPEAT CHORUS

Drink a toast for the ones who fuel all the fun

At the dive where you revive when your work day is done...we're...

REPEAT CHORUS

ALCOHAULIN’

ALCOHAULIN’

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

©2024

Grandma claimed it was the biggest oak for miles around

And it lived by the front porch of our old farmhouse

When it was too hot to fish I cooled off under its leaves

That’s when Grandma brought me out a glass of her sweet tea

Then almost like a Sunday prayer

She'd praise the cool in the air

Everybody needs a SHADE TREE

A quiet haven of rest

Somewhere to find peace of mind

And the reasons to feel blessed when the world turns up the heat

Everybody needs a SHADE TREE

Well I grew along that oak for eighteen of its rings

Then like the birds in its branches I spread my wings

All the people I meet in all the places I go

Need some kind of relief for their body or soul

Guess it’s true what Grandma used to say

Back on those hot summer days

REPEAT CHORUS

It could be a bible to the unevangelized

A bed for a stranger on a cold winter night

There's always an opportunity to be...

Somebody else's SHADE TREE

Their quiet haven of rest

Somewhere they find peace of mind

And the reasons to feel blessed when the world turns up the heat

Everybody needs a SHADE TREE

Everybody

Everybody

Everybody needs a SHADE TREE

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

Pamela Shuler (ASCAP)

©2024

I flip-flopped through the hotel lobby and past the tiki bar

When I reached the beach my Yeti on wheels put a helluva strain on my arm

But this lounge chair with umbrella is the best place I could be

Where the surf waves goodbye to what we had and I drown your memory

I'm getting...

SAND BLASTED

By the oceanside

Beer after beer stripping you off my mind

It might take a week or two

Until my outlook's good as new

The way it was before the day you trashed it

Oooh, oooh, oooh

SAND BLASTED

I spent a week trying to get over you back in our hometown

But the faces and friends and places we'd been couldn’t keep your memory down

So I booked the cheapest flight I could find where palm trees meet the coast

With a cooler for my luggage and a heartache full of hope...I'm getting...

REPEAT CHORUS

The first few days were rough without your kisses

But Modelo is making me mellow among the sea shells and star fishes

REPEAT CHORUS

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

©2024

His first taste of whiskey was a slow, smooth burn

That set his rebel mouth on fire

Gave him courage to speak his mind

To the bouncers, boyfriends and liars

Five broken bones and two marriages later

He was crowned the town agitator…now…

He's dry as a bone in an Arizona desert

Gentle as a baby on a pillow full of feathers

He's off rock bottom and that's a real good start

But he'll always be bruised and BOTTLE SCARRED

Well he finally found Jesus, got a job at the mill,

And a brand new outlook on life

He's repairing the bridges burned

With his family, friends and ex-wives

Some are forgiving his drinking and sinning

But most still need more convincing...that ...

REPEAT CHORUS

No matter how good his life gets it’ll never be the same

Since he killed his brain cells off and smeared the family name… but…

REPEAT CHORUS

Yeah, he'll always be bruised and BOTTLE SCARRED

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

David Cooper (BMI)

©2024

Grampa musta heard how I was spending my time

Out with a different gal every Friday night

Guess he thought I could use some good advice

So one hot sunny day

He lured me to the lake

After two hours of anglin’ with no luck in that heat

Grampa shrugged his shoulders and laid it out for me

You can spend your life casting a line

In the same old place, on the wrong day and time

But if you wanna land a keeper

Ya gotta go when and where they're assemblin'

There's a difference between FISHIN’ AND CATCHIN’

Well I thought about what Grampa said and the bad luck we had

And I finally figured out it was all part of his plan

To help me see the good in bein' a one woman man

So I traded chasing skirts

For Sundays in church

And I caught myself a keeper with a beautiful soul

Thanks to Grampa's wisdom that day out on his boat

REPEAT CHORUS

Today I'm takin' my son fishin' where Grampa changed my ways

We'll have lots of time for talking on such a hot and sunny day

REPEAT CHORUS

Yeah, there’s a difference between FISHIN’ AND CATCHIN’

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

©2024

I woulda never sold my truck

To buy that one-way ticket out

If I thought I could get over her

Back there in our home town

Guess I believed those songs about tequila

And the healing power of pretty Senoritas...but...

There's NO MAGIC IN MEXICO

Like they sing about on the radio

Sad feelings and emotions don't drown in the ocean

And the sun doesn't bake bad memories away

Hangovers are sure cheaper

The salty air is sweeter

And the sunsets move the soul

But there's no magic, NO MAGIC IN MEXICO

Looking back I wish I told my boss

I'd be two weeks on vacation

Instead of quittin' with my finger

In broken-hearted frustration

There's a lotta distractions down here to ease the pain

Truth be told I've only got one complaint

REPEAT CHORUS

...Mexico doesn't care who it's foolin' / It's all one big emotional illusion

REPEAT CHORUS

Oh, hangovers are sure cheaper / The salty air is sweeter

And the sunsets soothe the soul / But there's no magic, NO MAGIC IN MEXICO

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

Paul Bathen (BMI)

©2024

I watched dad reverse that pickup and trailer a hundred times before

Squeeze it through the cattle gate right to that old barn door

I was just fifteen when he handed me the keys to have a go

And he gave me some advice I guess he thought I'd need to know

If you find yourself in a bad situation

Put it in park say a prayer for patience

Re-evaluate which way you're goin'

Get yourself straightened out, there's no need to panic

Make slow and easy your goal and habit

Until it's second nature

BACKING UP A TRAILER

When I turned eighteen I left home to try and find myself

Made some thoughtless, quick decisions that made life a living hell

Then one night I had a dream I was back there on the farm

And I heard dad's words of wisdom echo in my heart

REPEAT CHORUS

Dad wasn't just talking about avoiding a jack-knife

It was meant to be a lesson for life

So if you find yourself in a bad situation

Put it in park say a prayer for patience

Re-evaluate which way you're goin'

Get yourself straightened out, there's no need to panic

Make slow and easy your goal and habit

Until it's second nature like

BACKING UP A TRAILER

Dewey Longuski (BMI)

©2024

You woke up this morning, caught me smiling, staring at your face

Truth be told I scan you head to toe every day

Now you wanna know what part of you I love the best

Well, they're all beautiful but one stands out from the rest

I PICK YOUR NOSE

Over your ears and your eyes

I PICK YOUR NOSE

Over the nape of your neck and thighs

Even when I consider all the feminine parts hidden under your clothes

Darlin', I still PICK YOUR NOSE

To you it's just a piece of flesh with two holes and a bridge

But to me it's cute as a button, sexier than sin

The way it curves so perfectly along the sides

It gives your profile class and highlights your pretty smile

REPEAT CHORUS

You might think it's gross and I'm just tryin' to be funny

But you asked me...more than once…and I can't lie to you, honey

REPEAT CHORUS

Even when I consider all the feminine parts hidden under your clothes

Darlin', I still PICK YOUR NOSE

There's a special place endangered on this earth

Where life lessons are first and foremost learned

It's a haven of rest; always safe and secure

That cherishes responsibility and God's Word

And there are still a few protecting it today

It's time the world stood up to give them thanks

HOME MAKERS

Faith-filled soul savers

Moms and Dads who vow, 'Forever'

Raising up their kids together

There's nothing like a family

For building a society

Where love and mercy touches hearts of all our friends and neighbors

God bless HOME MAKERS

Well, there's more than enough blame to go around

For the division in our cities and our towns

From foreign wars to climate change pollution

Protesting seems to be the best solution

But I say the answers start behind our front doors

Around dinner tables thanking the Lord...for...

REPEAT CHORUS

Any house can be a shelter from the rain

But to fill it full of love and hope it takes...

REPEAT CHORUS

God bless HOME MAKERS