A moist bear and a hot fox, both with soapy eyes, walk into a bar in Australia. One orders a "Kadoova", the other orders a "Chump." And let me tell ya, that bartender got the greatest e****ion you've ever seen in your entire life.

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Keep your hands, arms, feet, Pokémon and Blockbuster cards inside Mark's time machine at all times. And remember, every action has an equal and opposite distraction.

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For the price of one penny, you could have all the toy trains, crusty socks, and dead bodies imaginable!

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Things are gettin' real saucy between Wade, Bob, Mark, George & Martha Washington, skating flies, briefcase puppies, and a whole lot of ketchup.

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I want million, you want million, we all want million! (Celebrity guest appearances by Bob's Dad and Benjamin Franklin.)

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When is this? Where am I? Who's asking me all these trivia questions? Why is that man putting a condom on a bullet? And why is that other man... BALD?!

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Mark's life flashes before his very eyes, at the whim of Bob and Wade.

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The three founding fathers gather once again to re-evaluate the sacred text that is the "Distractible Constitution."

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Cloacas, buttholes, and toxic gas. That can only mean one thing... Mark's hosting!

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All of Wade's beautiful ideas... gone. Oh well, at least we still have kinky clowns, rooftop ninjas, and extra powerful bidets.

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