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November and December are historically slower months for divorce professionals. Even though they’ve made the decision to divorce, many people choose to wait until after the holidays to take any action. They worry about starting something that could instigate conflict during what should be the happiest time of the year for their kids.

That means there is a lot of pent up demand and so divorce professionals historically see an uptick in requests for their services in January. So much so that January is recognized as Divorce Month. And even more specifically, the first business day in January is usually referred to as National Divorce Day as family lawyers report that their phones ring off the hook. 

We’ve also talked about the efforts to begin repealing no-fault divorce laws and we would expect that anyone who’s been holding off may choose to move ahead now before any legislation could affect their ability to get divorced. So as a divorce coach, now is the perfect opportunity to position yourself as the go-to expert for those in need.

In today’s episode, we share some essential tips on how you can prepare for Divorce Month, optimize your marketing, and make sure your practice is ready to meet the demand. 

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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At DCA, we share a vision that couples would have the ability to rearrange and restructure their relationships and their families in a way that leads to wholeness and happiness. Divorce is often seen as an end—an ending to a marriage, an ending to a chapter of life. But what if it didn’t have to be a painful, adversarial process? What if divorce could be approached with intention, healing, and collaboration, with the goal of not just separating, but rebuilding lives in a healthy, sustainable way?

In today’s episode, we explore the idea of restorative divorce—an approach that focuses on healing, mutual respect, and long-term well-being for both partners. We’ll dive into how this process works, how it differs from adversarial divorce, and why we believe it’s a better way forward.

We wrestle with the concept that divorce creates a broken home, discuss the recent addition of CAPRD (Child Affected by Parental Relationship Disorder) to the DSM IV, and outline the six elements of a restorative divorce process. 

As opposed to traditional divorce that focuses on winning, a restorative divorce process is an alternative that can reduce harm, encourage positive outcomes, and support healthier post-divorce relationships for everyone involved.

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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We’re taking a detour from our planned topic today because we think it's time critical to talk about the implications of eliminating no-fault divorce. Based on this week's election results, as divorce professionals we need to be thinking about, discussing, and preparing for another potential shift in the landscape of divorce.

No-fault divorce has been around for decades, but there's been a growing push in some places to repeal it. But what would happen if we eliminated no-fault divorce? How would it change the dynamics of marriages, families, and even the legal system? Well, that's what we're exploring today.

Tracy and Debra talk through the potential implications of reinstating fault divorce including the impact on conflict, cost, our court systems and children.

The debate is complex, and there are no easy answers. But it’s important to keep discussing it and to think critically about the consequences—for the individuals and families involved, for you as a divorce professional, and for society as a whole.

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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We've talked previously about the problem cycle (see episode #69), but recently learned about the 3 poisons in Buddhism and they seem particularly applicable to some of the issues we see in divorce and co-parenting. 

In his early teachings, the Buddha identified “three poisons” or three negative qualities of the mind that cause most of our problems—and most of the problems in the world. 

1. Attachment: we want to attract and hold on to what is good for us (also called greed or lust).
2. Aversion: we want to repel what is bad for us (also called aggression or anger).
3. Ignorance: we are indifferent to what doesn’t affect us personally (also called delusion).  

So in this week's episode, Tracy and Debra are going to see if we can’t use some of this ancient wisdom to gain insight into shifting clients out of the problem cycle or suffering, into a mindset more grounded in acceptance and action. 

Listen in as we discuss how these 3 poisons show up in divorce and ways to apply the antidotes.

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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One of the most emotional and difficult parts of divorce can be negotiating parenting plans - especially for co-parents who are experiencing a high degree of conflict. We shared a statistic last week that 80% of the family court calendar is taken up by custody matters and frankly that breaks our hearts. Because we know that parental conflict is the #1 reason children are negatively impacted in the divorce process.

Today, we discuss why we believe a thorough and detailed parenting plan is the most effective way to help conflicted co-parents prevent future disagreements and future litigation.

An effective parenting plan goes well beyond just parenting time schedules and expense sharing, but encourages parents to discuss the many details of raising children together. Regardless of how parents feel about each other, the fact is that they will be family for life. As anyone with adult children knows, parenting doesn’t stop when a child turns 18.

We often hear that attorneys push back on discussing or documenting any agreements that aren’t supported by the legal statutes. The typical response is “That’s not enforceable”.  And we get it - lawyers are focused on the legal aspects of a divorce case. But as divorce coaches, we take a more holistic approach and are interested in helping families transition so they are able to co-parent effectively. 

Listen in as we chat about why we believe that changing the experience of divorce for families means moving beyond the legal minimum requirements and developing a comprehensive plan that works for each family. 

Conflicted Co-Parenting Training Begins Nov 4 --> Learn More and Enroll

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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We consistently say that all divorce involves conflict. Even in the most amicable divorce, couples aren’t likely to agree on everything. But one area that seems to spur the most conflict is co-parenting. We recently read that 80% of the court’s time is taken up by custody matters which tells us that co-parenting and making decisions about children is a hot button topic.

So today we're exploring one aspect that contributes heavily to co-parenting conflict and that’s when people have difficulty transitioning from stakeholders in each other’s lives to business partners. Moving from being a couple to being co-parents is a shift that can take time and requires both parents to focus on what’s best for their children instead of what’s important to them. 

We get into common triggers and obstacles, talk a bit about gatekeeping and alienation, and walk you through a real life client scenario.

If you're a certified divorce coach and want to learn more about supporting co-parents who are having difficulty, we'll be starting a 6-week co-parenting intensive beginning the week of November 4.

Learn more about becoming a DCA® Conflicted Co-Parenting Divorce Coach

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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When we talk with prospective students and new students, we get a lot of questions about what’s it’s really like to start a career as a professional divorce coach. So today, Christina Stone is going to give us all a behind the scenes look at what that journey is really like.

Christina is a Certified ADR Divorce coach and if that name sounds familiar, it’s because she also happens to be our Operations Coordinator here at DCA so you may have been in communication with her at some point.

Today Christina and Debra are sharing some truth and busting some myths about starting a career as a divorce coach. It is truly a viable career, but as Christina will tell you...it takes persistence, patience and a plan.

While there are exceptions, the majority of new divorce coaches do not make $60 or $70k their first year out and anyone who tells you something different has an agenda. But you can get there by staying focused on your goals, being part of a divorce coaching community, and continuing to learn and hone your skills.

We hope you enjoy getting to know Christina and we are thrilled to have her as part of the DCA community and team.

You can find Christina at:

Email: [email protected]
Website: cnfewcoaching.net
Instagram: c.n.fewcoaching

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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Being a solopreneur is hard. Being a solopreneur in a new industry is even harder. It takes a lot of focus, intention, and community support to build a successful practice as a new divorce coach.

We say it every week in the podcast intro because we mean it. We are committed to the success of our DCA trained divorce coaches and we provide so many ways for coaches in our community to connect, learn, and grow.

Why are we so passionate about offering these kinds of opportunities for our coaches? Because we are simultaneously focused on raising the standards of practice for the profession and ensuring that properly trained coaches stay in the industry.

Listen in as Tracy and Debra discuss all the ways DCA demonstrates their commitment to the coaches in our community including:

• Free online alumni community
• Free bi-monthly lunch & learn events
• Free listing on our coach locator
• Affordable professional case consultation groups
• No annual dues or certification renewal fees

We are personally invested in and committed to every single coach in our community. The world needs more properly trained and credential divorce coaches and we're here to support you every step of the way.

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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One thing that seems to be certain in divorce is that no one gets everything they want. Most walk away feeling like they had to give up more than their share in order to get to a final agreement.  Rarely do we hear a client say they thought the settlement was 100% fair and equitable. Most everyone feels like they got the short end of the stick.

So in this episode we dive into this idea of “fairness” and talk about how it can cause problems or create obstacles when it comes to getting to a final resolution. And we offer some coaching strategies for working with clients who get stuck in their own definition of "fairness".

Many clients start out saying “I just want what’s fair”. The trouble is that rarely will their spouse have the same definition of fair. We joke that “fair” is the 4-letter F word in divorce because what you think is fair, what I think is fair, and what the legal system thinks is fair can be wildly different. 

Listen in as Tracy and Debra discuss the concept of fairness and justice and how expanding our definition of what's "fair" may be the key to finally reaching an agreement everyone can feel OK about.

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]

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Divorce is hard enough with all the emotional turmoil, big challenges, and important decisions. It's even more difficult when your partner is intentionally working against you. But even more troublesome is when clients are working against themselves, so in this episode we're talking about self-sabotage.

 We discuss how to recognize it, and more importantly, how to support clients who are engaging in self sabotaging behavior that may be preventing them from reaching their desired goal or outcome.

Self-sabotage is a completely normal human behavior and shows up frequently in divorce and co-parenting as a result of fear of the unknown, perfectionism, lack of self belief, resistance to change, or learned behaviors.

Overcoming self-sabotage requires a combination of self-awareness, self-compassion, and intentional effort - all things divorce coaches are great at supporting our clients with.

Listen in as Tracy and Debra talk through why self-sabotage happens and how you can work with clients in self-destruct mode to get them on a better path.

Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:

Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.com
Instagram: @divorcecoachesacademy
LinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academy
Email: [email protected]