Do You Have A Couple Of Minutes

Yesterday we talked about evaluation and today we talk about using our findings to initiate a reset.  To reset we need to STOP doing what is not working for us.  We need to KEEP doing what is working.  Sometimes stopping isn't as easy as it may be attached to commitments, but we can make a plan to change and stop and work toward that goal.  When we embark on change, even keeping the good things going can be challenging because of the association they may have with the things we want to stop.  However, we must be intentional about the change and find ways to modify our behaviors and routine to make doing what we want to do possible and attainable.  Again, we may have to work at it but having an intentional goal is a start.  So, STOP what is not working and keep doing what is working.  Come back tomorrow when we continue our reset & rhythm series and progress to Boundaries.

We can get into ruts that require us to reset and get into a new rhythm.  I'm convinced that the great resignation we're witnessing has a lot to do with people wanting to hit the reset button on what matters to them and how they will spend their time.  Many people change jobs in hope of a clean slate.  Wanting a fresh start is part of life.  We wake up each day, hoping for that bit of renewal.  Well this week I'd like to share a few tips for you to use in resetting and getting into a rhythm for both "small" and large things.  Remember that a lot of times the small things are the large things.  Step 1 to reset requires we so a bit of evaluation.  What are our routines and our habits?  What are the outcomes of those habits?  Are our habits serving us? What we practice manifests in some way.  So take some time to think about how you invest your time and energy and then come back tomorrow to talk about resetting your habits.  Change is a normal part of life, and intention around change has huge impact. We can start small to have great impact but we must start.

We end the week with the Need for Self-Actualization, which is at the top of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs Pyramid.  The thing about pyramids and skyscrapers is that you can see the top of the structure from a distance, and you can see the outside shell of a structure, but both are massive undertakings with foundations and internal structural engineering to support their height.  Similarly, what allows a person to show up in a Self-actualized state is not always apparent.  Self-Actualization is the result of our journey to move closer to full self, we must complete the foundational work and ensure it is securely in place in order to support our growth.  If our foundation is compromised, what we build on top may tumble when tested.  Self-Actualization is the place where we seek out and live our dreams in authenticity.  This is the point in life where we develop and hone skills & knowledge.  In Self-actualization, we may pursue life dreams and happiness. Self Actualization is the result of doing the work as we sequentially progress, not something that can be obtained in its fullness out of order. However, sometimes people are in a hurry to reap the rewards without doing the work.  We seek to get to the state of self-actualization without doing the foundational work.  If shortcuts are used the results may be short-lived, if they are truly lived at all.  So as we enter the weekend, think about putting first things first.  What are things you need to do in order to build a foundation that supports your full capabilities? First things first!

Today we get the 3rd level of need which is a need for Love and Belonging.  Once our physiological and safety needs are met, there is a need to be a part of something bigger than ourselves  To love and to be loved, to belong.  This belonging can be to a small group such as a family unit or workgroup or something larger such as a large altruistic organization, professional society, church, etc. Belonging is important, as it creates more comfort in the bond, and may help provide greater awareness and insight into the circumstances around us.  What are the groups you belong to?  How do these groups impact how your view your identity? Today we will double dip and also mention the next need of esteem.  Once we belong, we want to be well regarded by others.  We enjoy the recognition that comes along with the recognitions that validate who we are.  the drive for esteem can be consuming.  We likely all know someone who seeks esteem through titles and recognition without regard for others. Esteem can serve to validate us and help us to believe things about ourselves that can embolden us. When was the last time you were validated by someone or something, how did that make you feel?  How might your actions have been impacted without that validation?  Tomorrow we talk about the final level in Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

We started the week with a theme of taking care of first things first, referring to an order or sequence for progression.  Yesterday we introduced Maslow's Hierarchy of needs and noted that foundationally physiological needs must be satisfied.  The next level of needs has to do with safety.  This is both physical safety and psychological safety and it allows for a level of predictability and normalcy to be present.  When we feel safe we have the ability to be open to explore, learn, and engage in new things.  We have the ability to enhance our experience without fear or anxiety.  While we tend to pay attention to physical safety, psychological safety sometimes gets underrated.  Having environments that do not require us to be on the alert harmful situations helps to provide greater ability to focus on things we want to learn or experience.  When we don't feel safe our focus turns to protection and it impacts our behaviors and interactions with others.  It is important that we seek out places that provide both physical and psychological safety to share, learn, and grow in authenticity.  When in positions of authority we must do our part to provide and demand safe spaces for others.  When we feel safe we are able to grow.  Next time we will talk about Love & Belonging. 

Today, let's take a look at Maslow's hierarchy of needs in reference to first things first.  Yesterday we talked about the sequence of things and building a strong foundation from which things can flourish.  Psychologist Abraham Maslow asserted that there were 5 levels of needs to be satisfied for an individual to be able to achieve peak human experience.  The hierarchy is shaped as a pyramid, and the base needs are our physiological needs.  Think about things such as air, food, water, shelter, clothing, sleep, warmth.  A great example of this are many of the reality TV shows where people are left to fend for themselves in remote places.  They usually first seek the basics finding a water source, setting up camp for shelter.  When someone starts employment in a business setting we have a modern day example of satisfying basic needs, we usually share with them where the basics are located, such as food, drink, restrooms.  The basics need to be satisfied in order for us to move to greater things and trying to satisfy the basics can bring some motivation.  Think about how the body and mind respond with lack of food, water, and sleep, we are motivated to satisfy these needs to perform at a higher level. It is not always immediately obvious whether or not these needs are met when we initially encounter people.  Sometimes, we fail to provide ourselves with adequate basic needs, usually, sleep deprivation, skipping meals, eating things that are not nutritious, and not getting enough water, to name a few.  In order for each of us to live our best lives, we must take care of the basics.  In order to help those around us, we must help to ensure other have taken care of their basic needs as well.  Tomorrow, we will take a look at Level 2 - Safety Needs.

There is an order to things and figuring out that order is key.  The thing about order is that sometimes things build on top of one another, acting as foundational support for the next level.  Sometimes things compliment one another and the order is more about alignment and fit, than sequence.  Learning usually comes in a sequential manner.  We learn to crawl before walking, and then we run. Albeit, we may pick up information along life's way that may "fall" or "fit" into place much later and help provide insight and clarity.  Sometimes we are in a hurry to get ahead and we sacrifice the foundational learning in exchange for mimicking others.   Perhaps, we spend time memorizing instead of truly seeking understanding for application. When the circumstances change we are not equipped to adjust the learning to aid the situation.  We take shortcuts all the while knowing the importance of a strong foundation, of footings that are deeply anchored to support future growth and success.  This week let's talk about starting with and mastering first things first, and encouraging and allowing others around us to do the same.  The more sound our foundation, the more it will be able to support.  As my friend Glenn Lundy always says "You can't cheat the grind - you only get what you put in." So this week let's talk about sequence and putting first things first.

Wrapping up the week with building your success muscle of focus.  Let's admit it - Distraction is real.  Especially in this time of advancing technologies that seek to grab our attention if just for a few brief seconds.  You've likely had the experience of losing your train of thought. or being in flow and being interrupted only for it to take you quite a time to get back into flow if you were able to do so.  These are perfect examples of why building the success muscle of focus is important.  We need to understand how we can avoid the distractions that take us off course and then be intentional about setting up those boundaries to allow us to build and practice maintaining our focus.  Over time it will become easier to not be persuaded by FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) from moving toward what we truly desire.  We will be able to focus in a way that ensures alignments with our passions, goals, and objectives.  Our focus now is the pavement of our road forward.  So, the next time you lose focus, don't get down on yourself, try to understand why?  Sometimes, we may not be focused on the right things and so they do not hold our attention, sometimes we may need more discipline - maybe deep down the goal or desire is not valued as much as we say it is.  However, once we are able to build and maintain focus, we can make steady and intentional progress forward.

Perseverance is the will and the drive to keep pressing forward despite whatever may be on the road ahead.  Tenacity is the will and effort to maintain a tight grip.  When moving toward your idea of success both perseverance and tenacity are two more of the success muscles you must build.  I don't like New  Year's Resolutions because I think many times they are made without giving thought to perseverance and tenacity.  In fact, I have heard that most New Year's Resolutions are broken in less than three weeks.  Planning, and to some extent, getting started are the easy parts, but it takes perseverance to keep moving forward.  It takes tenacity to maintain a hold on your dreams and objectives.  so the next time you come to a point of decision, where it might be easy to give in or let go, remember this is a chance to build your success muscles of perseverance and tenacity.  And our successful muscles get stronger over time if we keep exercising them and putting them to the test.  Keep growing those success muscles! Come back tomorrow when we'll be talking about the success muscle of Focus.

Remember the story of the little red engine, that said, 'I think I can, I think I can, I know I can, I know I can?"  That is a story about building the success muscle of determination. The success muscle of Determination is all about growing belief in yourself.  It is important that you have a strong belief in yourself, as it will attract others to you, and it will help sustain you when others around you cast doubt.  I am sure we can all think about times when we were able to build our belief in ourselves over time to the point of a determination to achieve our goals or finish what we started because we were determined to do so. Riding a bike, taking a tough course load, and training for a marathon.  I am sure we can also think about times when we were discouraged or overwhelmed and unable to summon the determination needed to get the job done and we are left with the thoughts: "if only" and "what if?".  When we go through difficulties or new challenging opportunities and experiences, faced with distractions and naysayers, yet we intentionally choose to believe we have what it takes we are building that muscle of determination.  When our determination pays off on the initial and small tasks, it gives us the momentum we need to apply greater determination in the future.  So the next time you are tempted to doubt yourself, stop and work that muscle of Determination. Remind yourself: 'I think I can, I think I can, I know I can, I know I can' and continue believing in yourself and putting in the effort.  Remember success is built over time, keep going and encourage others to do the same!