Don Woods

The song I have sent you this week is entitled “Wirral Wonderland” and is a track off one of my DVDs about the area….which you will be familiar with. I mostly send you demos of my songs but this is a finished job…I think you’ll like it….it goes well when matched up with the video. David Bowie has been heavily featured in the news…a sad loss indeed but whether it warrants blanket coverage on the national news is debateable…although he was a one-off…I was totally inspired by him when I first heard the ZiggyStardust album through headphones in 1969…it revolutionised recording techniques …brilliant…he started out as a sax player…my wife worked with a guy who sessioned on his records…a chap called Brian Wilshaw who became a music teacher…how cool is he….he certainly altered the path of popular music. The entertainment level of TV is gradually sinking to an all time low…I watched an episode from the new series of “Open All Hours” with David Jason playing the main character…how can someone of his status be involved in a dreadful sitcom like this…not only is it totally unfunny the canned laughter every 10 seconds is so irritating….surely Mr.Jason can see this? BUT….NOTHING can be worse than the new series of “Benidorm” which I watched out of interest thinking it can only be better than the last series which was diabolical….it wasn’t…in fact it was worse if that is possible….it has to be the WORST programme ever…it’s like a scrap heap for third-rate actors….an insult to any normal person’s intelligence….the cast MUST be short of money…. I also watched the new Tracy Ullman Show expecting good things….oops another dud. .It strikes me that modern television mainly caters for a very small percentage of the population….they put snooker on ALL afternoon….football matches at prime time .. and even had the FA Cup draw live on The One Show….as it happens I like sport but if you don’t your nose is pushed right out of the picture…I don’t understand why they can’t have a free sports channel?…then all the housewives can enjoy an evening in front of the box. The TV companies should realise that sport isn’t for everyone….and speaking of which I have yet to see the point of “Question Of Sport”….hard to believe that the charismaless “Tuffers” and Mat Dawson actually get paid for this none event….what was that song by Springsteen “100 channels with nothing on”. .A bit of local history for you….there is a small hamlet (which is a village without a church for your interest) calledSaughall Massie which is near the centre of Wirral (you will know it well)…on its outskirts is a small stone bridge which takes traffic over a narrow brook….this was designed by a chap called Thomas Brassey who is responsible for a great percentage of bridges and viaducts all over the world….this little bridge was his first venture…and there is a plaque at the side of it in his honour….another Wirral World First !!!…and that’s why I write songs about it.

The song I’ve sent you this week was from my more “commercial” era (lol)…..it’s sung by a friend of mine called Sue Young who had a great voice … she did the clubs as well but had a superb session voice…I used to call her “One Take” Sue…..I used to have a demo service where people would send me their songs in rough form (sometimes just a voice) and I would knock them into shape for them to send to publishers…and Sue would sing the female parts…she would have a couple of listens then hit it in one go…she was wonderful to work with.This was a song I wrote for her….we got radio play which gave her some publicity and some extra gigs. I used to use a few session girls singers…one being Pauline Daniels and another Julie Bright…these were the days before the modern trend of females shouting and yelling out songs and destroying them. I watched a programme called “Brucie’s Hall of Fame”….which was supposed to be presented by Bruce Forsyth…but as he’s not well his place was taken by Alexander Armstrong (who we talked about the other week)….he had artists on who were paying tribute to the stars they were inspired by….a good idea but sadly it didn’t come off at all…..Beverly Knight paid tribute to Sam Cooke with a yelling session…I like her very much but I think she is a bit misguided vocal wise…and other acts which were pretty bad…then I had to endure Alexander (who now fancies himself as a singer…which he aint) launching into some swing song slipping out of pitch on occasions…awful…BUT finished with a bigshouty note and got a standing ovation…so what do I know? .At the other end of the spectrum I finally finished watching “The Tudors” which I have on a box set….there are four series covering the reign of Henry V111 and was the best thing I have ever seen. It was brilliant and wonderfully acted and produced….I am now an authority on Henry….up until then I always thought that Henry the eighth was the bloke who invented fractions (gerrit?) What makes this series so good is it is TRUE….you couldn’t make it up…what a bloke he was….not one to upset. … on the history front this will interest you if you didn’t know….I was taking a stroll around Woodside in Birkenhead (which is where I took the photograph I sent you of the newly painted ferry boat)…the area has been totally renovated over the last few years and gives a wonderful different angle on The Mersey….I came across a plaque concerning the HMS Birkenhead which was built locally and was the first ship to come to a disastrous end….it hit rocks and the hull was split open…as there weren’t enough lifeboats the women and children were taken off first…this became known as “The Birkenhead Drill” and was used on the Titanic disaster years later…”women and children first”. I watched a programme about The Prince’s Trust where Ant and Dec interviewed Prince Charles and accompanied him on some of his charity missions.I thought The Prince came over very well and his organisation certainly does a lot of good. I must say I smiled at his visit to a prison where he spoke to three inmates….handpicked or what? No matter what you think of Chaz and his “privileged” life I must say I couldn’t think of anything worse….to be constantly hounded by people who either grovel or despise you must be awful…and there is no escape…fame always comes with a price…had John Lennon not been a Beatle he would have lived twice as long….fame – no thanks.

The song this week is a demo I found in the drawer which I had forgotten about….it’s called “Nosey Parker” and was a song I wrote for The Krankies a while back….it was for their panto where Janette played Pinocchio and sang it in the show….I remember her saying how they laughed at the way I sang “church”…and “perch”. I have written a lot of songs for them over the years but I have only seen them do one live….it was for a show in Blackpool where she wanted a mickey take of “I’m a Barbie Girl”….I came up with “I’m a boobie Girl”…which involved Jan coming on with these enormous inflatable boobs which went bigger and bigger as the song went on…it was hilarious. The floods have been unbelievable in Cumbria….people losing everything… I’m wondering whether all those countries we send money to will be having a collection for these poor folk….I very much doubt it. People have to place their belongings outside their property so the insurers can check….and there have been reports of some of it being stolen by organised looters … some really nice people around eh? One man was moving his furniture out and left his sons wheelchair on the pavement…and it was stolen by a passing car…even if you catch this scum they will probably get away with a warning….they should string them up in the street and hand out baseball bats.. Also in the Midlands there have been workers trying to get the power back into the town and…wait for it….parking attendants are slapping tickets on there cars while they are working…great stuff eh? I’m all for legal parking but when roads are under 4 feet of water I think a little bit of common sense is required…..the council however are apparently panicking to waive the fines…out of embarrassment….problem is you give a moron a bit of power and it goes to their head. I went over to Liverpool last Tuesday afternoon and the place was buzzing…..the atmosphere was electric….there were groups busking in the streets….top quality stuff too…and there’s even an outdoor ice rink down by Albert Dock….I met up with a pal of mine and we went for a pint and a bite to eat in The Pumphouse in Albert Dock…which you will know…and the value was top notch…hence the place was full. It’s nice to see the City doing so well…it’s a pleasure to go there. A few years back I decided to finish gigging…after my 50th consecutive new years eve bash….so going out is no longer an option….nice meal…bottle of wine … and a bit of telly. Looking back to the days when my band played from 8 til 2 in the morning I shudder. I watched the fireworks on TV at midnight … I wondered how much that lot cost?....and how about the high rise in Dubai going up in flames?...what is it made of balsa wood?

The song I’ve sent you is a live recording of part of a concert I did a few years back with James Burton at the Floral Pavilion New Brighton….James was the guitarist on Ricky Nelson’s records in the 50’s and early 60’s and backed Elvis during his Vegas years…I was a huge fan of Ricky mainly because of the great guitar solos on his records .. so to eventually have the privilege of performing his songs with my guitar hero was a bit special…I have since done five concerts with the great man the latest being last July at Fort Perch Rock in New Brighton where we did 14 Ricky hits with those stunning solos….he is a great guy and a pleasure to know….this is “Hello Mary Lou” 2.The BBC have brought back the chat show where Claire Balding interviews sports personalities….sadly it doesn’t work….whereas I like Claire Balding very much she struggles to get any entertainment value out of her guests…sports stars are not showbiz….they should stick to what they do…it’s like those dreadful records footballers used to make (e.g. “Hoddle and Waddle)…they should not be let within a mile of a recording studio….they would have enough to say if Tom Jones turned out on the wing. I once composed a song for Tranmere Rovers…we got the players into the studio to sing it … resulting in MY demo being released….case closed. 3.I also watched the live performance of “The Sound Of Music” on ITV….it was brilliant…and LIVE!!...tough call that one…I think this will get plenty of awards…and I also enjoyed the documentary on the “Take That” tour….I was knocked out….the amount of effort put into the show was staggering….they certainly set the bar very high. Take That are an out fit I don’t want to like….but I can’t help it. 4.There has been a spate of programmes looking back at the sixties and seventies TV….and how un P.C. it all was….this was before the P.C.Brigade rose up and killed entertainment….I accept that through young eyes some of the antics on these programmes must seem pretty unbelievable but what is annoying is the likes of Biggins and some of the older female presenters looking totally shocked when watching it….they were there!!!...what’s the big surprise?..... Having said this we still have some funny comedians…Peter Kay being one of them…there was a great documentary on him the other night…he is very clever. Then at the other end of the spectrum we have John Bishop with his own show….oh dear. 5.I used to video the annual nativity for a primary school where my son was a teacher….and one year it featured two little 8 year old girls playing their violins…it was so bad I suggested to the parents that I send the clip to You’ve Been Framed….it was accepted and was featured on the Christmas special….we were invited to go along to the show and meet Lisa Riley etc….so the parents took their kids and I went with my wife…I got 250 quid which I split with the two kids….and I told them “no matter what road you take in life you can always say you played your violins on TV on Christmas day…AND GOT PAID FOR IT!!...and not many people can say that”……I wonder what happened to them?

To round off the Christmas play I have sent you two of the remaining songs….”Santa’s Song” and “In Me Christmas Stockin’”…..we have reached the stage where after our main hero Jimmy who doesn’t believe in Father Xmas wakes up on Xmas morning with no presents thus,to his mind,proving his point so he wanders round to his pals house to let him know he is right…meeting the milkman and the postman on the way…neither of whom can convince him he is wrong….he arrives at his mate’s to find him with all his presents….his pal then takes him down the road where Santa is just about to take off for home….he recognises Jimmy and tells him “if you don’t believe …you don’t get”….Jimmy apologises but Santa tells him it’s too late…he’ll have to wait til next year…Santa then sings his song explaining that it’s not just a once a year job.(Santa was played by my mate Carl Chase who can be seen in films like “The Mummy” and “Cut Throat Island”)….Jimmy is shattered….then suddenly he finds himself in his bedroom….he had been dreaming after all…AND he had a stack of presents….and his mum says she found a note on his pillow “I decided to make one more stop”…so WAS it in fact a dream?....the play finishes with Jimmy singing “In Me Xmas Stockin’”….. The play was broadcast by Radio City on two consecutive Christmas’s and was nominated for a Sony Award….it was taken up by many schools in the area which resulted in me writing two more follow ups. 2.I watched a programme on Ken Dodd…what an incredible man….to me he is the greatest entertainer the world has ever produced. Considering his age he is still at the top of his game….his contribution to show business is mammoth….and yet the powers that be have never awarded him a knighthood which he thoroughly deserves…maybe he is too funny (unlike the comedians of today) or maybe they are too busy awarding knighthoods to the likes of Jimmy Savile and Rolph Harris…to me he will always be SIR Ken Dodd. ….nowadays we have to put up with the likes of “Chattyman” Alan Carr squawking away with his unfunny gay inuendo 3.I read an article which made me smile….apparently Janette Tough who is Jimmy Krankie is to have a part in the “Absolutely Fabulous” film with Joanna Lumley and co doing their bit…Janette plays a Chinaman….but because her face is painted YELLOW…GOD FORBID…there have been screams of “RACIST!””….have you ever heard such absolute tripe…this P.C. lot need to get over themselves before they destroy comedy once and for all…it’s pathetic…it HUMOUR for heaven’s sake…..might as well cancel all pantos before some moron decides the dame is homophobic. Janette and Ian are friends of mine and they are a delightful couple who haven’t got a racist bone in their bodies….time some of our population got real. 4.On a similar subject…when you see these wonderful school Christmas plays and nativities what you are seeing a is a collection of young human beings who see each other as equal…there is no hatred no jealousy etc….the problem with the world today is the poison put into these innocent minds by parents who want to live through their kids. We go on about how kids should be taught when in fact they could teach us a lesson or two….maybe one day the world will see this. 5.We have had some very strange weather in this country lately….14 – 16 degrees in DECEMBER….warmest since records began…maybe I misheard our wonderful TV forecasters back in September when we were warned of temperatures of MINUS 30 degrees on their way…pretty close eh?...how much are these “experts” on again?....it’s very strange when blossoms are appearing on trees and daffodils are sprouting….personally I prefer the standard winter with a bite in the air. Had a stroll around the Chester wall this week…extremely quiet…I thought the shops would be heaving…not so…very strange….but very nice.

The song this week is the continuing saga of the musical I wrote for Radio City back in the 80s. So up to now Jimmy,who doesn’t believe in Father Christmas,wakes up to find he’s got no presents….so he sings “There’s No Santa Claus” (which you played a couple of weeks ago)…he then hot foots it around to his mate’s house to prove his point…on the way he meets the milkman who tries to convince him he’s wrong and sings “If you don’t believe in Father Christmas” (which you played last week)…he then continues on his way and bumps into the postman…played by the late Joe Butler….who sings this lament “Letter Box Blues”….the demo is very basic as a lot of schools wanted to do the play so I arranged the songs to suit a single piano. The Lake District has taken a hammering with the recent storms and floods….I was up in Kendal last week….just got out in time. As usual there HAS to be someone to blame….if it’s not the Government for not spending out on flood defences it’s climate change….next it’ll be diesel cars polluting the atmosphere…..there doesn’t seem to be an answer….the locals don’t want the flood barriers too high because it will effect their view …so where do you go….what seems to be lacking is the safety side of it….people wandering down flooded streets should have a stick or a branch to make sure they are not going to step down a grid and break their leg….but I do feel sorry for the locals…what a mess. Tyson Fury has upset the applecart with his comments about women and gays….I don’t know why these guys don’t just sit back and enjoy being champion of the world and keep their mouths shut….his father was bawling and shouting at an interview saying people should now bow down to him….it’s all a question of intellect I suppose…he is heavyweight champion of the world (at the moment)….don’t spoil it all by trying to be funny and clever….there’s a move afoot to remove him from Sportsman of the Year – might teach him a lesson. I remember when Daley Thompson won it and got up to make his speech and said an unnecessary rude word…and quickly corrected himself….obviously to amuse his mates….didn’t see a lot more of him after that…silly boy. There has also been a news report about football refs being verbally and physically abused by fans and players….it’s disgraceful….when you compare it with rugby…talk back to the ref and you are off!!...why can’t they do this with football….. perfectly describes the difference in mentality….the football fraternity are too busy shovelling money into their bank accounts….. and footballers are getting a bit too big for their boots….so to speak……they should learn to respect those who put them where they are. watched the Royal Command Performance during a baby sitting session….so there was no escape….OH DEAR. I thought One Direction were about as exciting as watching archery….and the comedians proved that comedy is DEAD and BURIED…..Jeff Lynne stole the show…which wasn’t difficult as the rest of it was awful…definitely time for old Elton to call it a day….and a bucket should be supplied for the constant creeping up to the royalty…and making “risky” jokes….sad. Even little Kylie was pretty bad (miming I think)….it was just dreadful…at least Sir Brucie and Sir Terry weren’t involved….that was one blessing.

The song this week is another from the musical I wrote for Radio City which was broadcast back in the 80s. the story so far….the main character Jimmy doesn’t believe in Father Xmas and has woken up on Xmas day to find no toys…so he sings the song you played last week (There’s no Santa Claus)…so he smugly goes round to his friend’s house to prove his point…on the way he bumps into the milkman (played by Paul Damian in the play) who tries to put him straight….to no avail…..this is the demo Paul and I worked from….next instalment next week…..exciting isn’t it? We have just been informed that Messi will be playing his football in Manchester….but he’s only getting paid 800 grand A WEEK……football really is becoming a joke. What is pathetic is there are no LOCAL lads in any of the teams….the game should be called “spot the Englishman”…..and they have the cheek to say it’s not the fans who are paying because the entrance fee is only a small percentage of the club’s income…..so why rip off the supporters with exorbitant prices? I quite enjoy watching football highlights on TV but I would never pay to see a game. 3.The X Factor is taking a bashing from the media….I don’t watch it…personally I find it the lowest form of entertainment….but it clearly shows the vulnerability of the sheep who do watch it…..and actually think they are part of it by VOTING…as if that makes any difference. I watched it years ago when it started until I was nearly sick….then I thought it MUST have improved so I watched the first one of this series…and I WAS sick….same old boring format…absolute drivel with Simon Cowell sitting there mentally counting his cash….a talent show judged by talentless people…unbelievable. Hey !! we have actually WON something….the cricket…which is about as interesting as a geology lecture…and The Davis Cup….which would be fine if Andy Murray enjoyed the moment instead of moaning about the lack of interest from our “up and coming” youngsters…..they showed the fabulous 2 million pound facilities we built after the Olympics….not a soul in sight…..I think the problem lies with the likes of Murray…he is BORING….youngsters want pop star type personalities as role models….not someone who sends you to sleep when being interviewed … for example Rafa Nadal….Roger Federer etc who are exciting and LOOK the part…Andy looks like he got his kit from a charity shop. 5.I hate to say it but I have been watching “I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here”…and REALLY enjoying it….the arguments between the infamous Lady C (who I had never heard of before) and the other participants is hilarious….and I’ve always been a huge fan of Chris Eubank….it’s classic television and even Ant and Dec are funny. It’s a programme you do not want to like but have no choice. Aparently Lady C is suing ITV because she was “bullied” while she was in the jungle…..great stuff….what was needed was Liam Gallagher in the mix….there’s a show right there.

The song I have sent you this week “There’s No Santa Claus”…is from the musical I wrote for Radio City in the 80’s. I revolves around a little kid who doesn’t believe in Father Christmas….he wakes up on Christmas Day and hasn’t got any presents…thus proving his point…he then sings this song which asks some good questions…he eventually finds out how wrong he is…but you’ll have to wait til next week for the next instalment. This was the demo the kid worked from….the backing is in his key….that’s my excuse. I watched One Direction on Jonathan Ross….I know I am from a different generation but I’m blowed if I can see what they have….they have sold millions of records so I am obviously wrong…they are so BORING ….For me “bands” have to PLAY….for example McFly or The Sterophonics etc….that’s talent…just don’t get these boy/girl bands who are totally dependant on musicians.........and I don’t know whose idea it was to have Piers Morgan on ITV Breakfast television….it’s like a punishment….he is unbearable….I’ve never heard such a false laugh….sorry…guffaw. The problem I have with modern music is the production is “compressed”…and the use of vocoders makes it all sound the same….come back good old reel to reel all is forgiven…..the days when you had to play all the way through and sing in tune without assistance. There was a recent discussion on TV regarding the cost of court proceedings…and how those who WIN their case are hit with huge solicitors bills. They had the MP who was recently accused of sexual assault….got cleared in court and ended up with a £130.000 bill from his barristers........This is the problem with this country….it’s the greed which goes un-noticed…especially in the legal profession….how can this sort of fee be justified…the bloke was INNOCENT!!! Now he’s virtually bankrupt........... It’s like these hotels who charge 14000 pounds a NIGHT to rich idiots who don’t know what to do with their money….pure scavengers…it’s a disgrace….and the rest of us are asked to send £3 to help an underprivileged kiddie. This week I went to see my old pal Monty Lister who is now in a care home….on the way I collected another good friend of mine called Cliff Crozier….who was a headmaster in various schools in my area. He was telling me about his intended trip to Canada and about his recent non-stop activities…including a presentation to him of a telegram from the Queen….yes Cliff is 100 years old !!...an absolute one-off…he was telling me about the protocol which has to be observed during the presentation….where “no speeches” should take place etc…however the mayor of Wirral decided he would make the presentation and jumped up and gave a speech…..no comment…..I took a photo of Cliff and put it on my website…check it out …. www.donwoods.co.uk.....He says age is just a number which you simply ignore. Monty Lister worked on Radio Merseyside,as you know,and was the first person to interview The Beatles….he became a friend of mine when I used to produce jingles for the station back in the day…he asked me if I would help him out with his Sunday morning programme….as I was out gigging on the two or three nights before I didn’t really fancy it…but he said it would only be for a few weeks….5 years later I was still there!! But in that time I accompanied him and did the sound on his many travelogues he did for his programme…they included day trips to the likes of Rome,Marakech,Norway,Venice etc etc….and as Cliff was always there as well we have plenty to talk about on our visits to him.

The song this week is a song is from a Christmas musical I wrote for Radio City in the 80’s…..this is the demo the cast worked from…..the kids in the play sang the song and the play was broadcast on Christmas day two years on the trot….it was also nominated for a Sony Award….the cast included Johnny Kennedy…Paul Damian…the late Joe Butler…Carl Chase… and others. The song also recorded by Penny Page and Googi on vinyl….the play went on to be performed by a lot of schools…all good stuff. ….A friend of mine told me her son and daughter in law went to Rome on their honeymoon….while they were at the train station he went to sort out the tickets and left her with the cases…she felt water dripping on her head so she looked up…when she looked down the cases had gone…passports the lot …. obviously some moron with a water pistol…. I saw her again this week and she told me the same couple were in Paris over last weekend…with their baby…talk about unlucky….it’s nice to see the support we are giving to the French during these terrible times…it’s hard to believe it all. ………I enjoyed the podcast you sent me with your Albert Lee interview….he is a great guitarist but as he says there are so many different styles so it’s impossible to be the best “overall” guitarist…Albert is a guitarists guitarist enjoyed mainly by those who know what to listen for….(the average audience don’t know the difference between Segovia and George Formby)…and his “first” instrument is the piano….so imagine how good he is on that…..to play with the likes of these guys is very special but as I’ve always said you have Vegas… or the local pub…same pressures different venue. But what is nice is the respect you get from these guys…because they don’t need to feed their egos….they understand the game. On the subject of musicians….Alexander Armstrong (from the “Pointless” quiz programme) has decided that he is one….he keeps appearing on TV going on about how he is a trained musician but decided to take up comedy in his 20’s…Hmm…plays a bit of piano which is O.K. then sings…which makes you realise why he took up comedy. And of course it has to be all the “swing” standards that only the Rat Pack do properly…it’s pretty bad…BUT his album has got into the charts which proves you can kid most of the people most of the time…but he wont make much as he doesn’t write the stuff…then we have Peter Andre with his “swing” album…same stuff…and he’s even worse….but no doubt the sheep who phone in their votes for “Strictly” will buy it….give us a break guys…give us something ORIGINAL !!

The song I’ve sent you this week is another from the Cheshire Cats album we did back in the day….it’s an oldie called “White Sports Coat” c/w “Butterfly” and is a track I produced for Derek Smith who was the founder of The Cheshire Cats…..he put a lot of work in to keep it all going and was a pleasure to know…he was a massive Elvis fan and used to dress up as the King and delight the crowd…sadly he is another one we lost a few years ago….he was my best mate and I miss him. Speaking of Elvis…Jonathan Ross had Prescilla Presley on his chat show…she is over here to promote a CD which features remasteredElvis tracks singing with the BBC Symphony Orchestra….she was very demure BUT also on the show was Danny Dyer who proved what an absolute YOB he is….playing the cockney “tough guy” with his unnecessary rhyming slang and bad language…poor old Prescill didn’t have a clue what he was talking about…then to top it all on comes Elvis Costello (complete with silly hat)….who Ross announced as “the greatest songwriter this country gas produced”….er….excuse me….I only know a few of his records…one being “Olivers Army”…and another “She”….neither of which he wrote….so forget Lennon and McCartney….or Tim Rice and Lloyd Webber…or Lionel Bart….obviously Jonathan is hearing something we aren’t…then they bring on the REAL Elvis’s guitar which Mr. Costello strums on and sings one of his own songs….proving he is definitely not the best songwriter or in fact the best singer…dreadful…felt sorry for Prescilla. The news covered a story this week about a lollipop lady who was sacked for waving at passing motorists….because the council had received ONE complaint….also a lollipop man was sacked for giving kids “high fives” as they went past him…from a similar complaint……this is according to the media….who only ever give one side of these stories so how true it is is debateable….however the fact that someone complained doesn’t surprise me…these people are out there looking for the slightest thing to complain about….e.g. a photo of Cameron NOT wearing a poppy……there should be a law forbidding these sad irritating types to ever leave their houses…they serve no purpose whatsoever to the human race. Another interesting news item featured a man who returned a lock to a locksmith because it was faulty….because of the way he was dressed the locksmith blew him a kiss and made some gesticulations…deeply “offending” the customer ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS……so much so he took it to court and was awarded 7000 pounds in damages…..apparently it’s the first case of it’s kind where nothing was actually said….what wasn’t explained was WHY he kept going back to the shop??....so it looks like we not only have to walk around with duck tape over our mouths…we now have to have our hands tied behind our backs…or we are in danger of being politically incorrect….is the legal system in this country serious??? And finally a classic….the BBC are asking the general public around the country to…wait for it….send in weather reports from their area….NOW I’ve heard it all….despite all the equipment the weather people have they very rarely get the forecast right…which is what we have discussed in the past…so this is the answer “we think people will be pleased to be involved” say the Beeb….nice cheap way out eh?....and people will get involved because they have nothing better to do….at least it might stop them complaining about lollipop ladies…..what a world.