Dr. Gary Bell's Absurd Psychology

There are two paths we can take in any given situation: one is the path of avoiding pain in the moment, and the other is the more difficult path of delaying pleasure for a bigger purpose. Our cultural norms encourage us to seek Band-Aid solutions and temporary comforts—basically, whatever it takes to ease our discomfort now. This is apparent in the prevalence of casinos, commercials for psychiatric medications, and get rich quick schemes in our culture. Some people don’t see the value in having patience during difficult times or working toward a goal; they want to lose the weight now and would rather buy the latest, greatest cell phone than save for retirement. We often make our life choices according to how we can avoid pain in the moment and, in doing so, fail to see that the path of delayed gratification is sometimes where the real solutions to our problems lie. Tune in and learn what causes this enormous emotional issue!

Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) is more than simply feeling sad, experiencing grief, or being super drained of energy. Those feelings are totally valid, but like most feelings, they’ll eventually pass. MDD is an often-debilitating mental illness that presents as a cluster of depressive symptoms. For most people, clinical depression won’t go away on its own and you can’t “just snap out of it.” While melancholy and exhaustion are part of depression, there are other symptoms to look for, including losing interest in things you once enjoyed, trouble sleeping, sudden crying spells, withdrawing from others, hopelessness, thoughts of self-harm or suicide, and more. Depressive episodes vary in severity and duration, but they must last for two weeks or more to qualify for an MDD diagnosis. Many people with clinical depression do their best to conceal symptoms from the people around them. They may feel vulnerable and embarrassed for showing “weakness,” or worry that their friends and colleagues might judge them or just plain ghost them. Remember: MDD is not a negative attitude, a character flaw, or a sign of weakness. Tune in and learn how to recognize Major Depressive Disorder!

When it comes to narcissism, there is a spectrum of severity. While many people have narcissistic traits, some people have personalities that are highly narcissistic. Others have full blown narcissistic personality disorder. It’s well known that narcissistic exposure can damage an adult badly enough. But the traumatizing effects of being raised by a narcissist leaves psychic scars which drive many into therapy later in life. These scars can be thought of as common traits of children with narcissistic parentsEvery parent-child relationship involves some amount of occasional conflict, stress and confusion. This is not exactly breaking news and has been the premise of many a pop culture offering. We expect it, accept it, and, for the most part, manage it.However, there are instances where things go far past the normal family pitfalls. A particularly dangerous example involves the presence of a highly narcissistic parent. In this case, family life and it’s inevitable conflict looks nothing like a T.V. sitcom. And the harm done is not easily undone. Tune in and learn how to identify and move on from narcissistic parents!

Every marriage has its ups and downs. But if you're reading this, chances are yours has been down for a while now. Maybe you’ve been dealing with an intensely stressful situation like a job change, a new baby, or having to care for an aging parent. Or maybe you’re arguing over money, or someone cheated, or your sex life has gone kaput. There are lots of different scenarios that have the potential to send a relationship into a downward spiral.  When a marriage starts to falter, one thing’s for sure: Each partner starts putting their personal needs over the needs of their relationship. That can make working through a tough situation almost impossible. And instead of being on the same page, it can feel like you’re almost always talking past each other. Tune is and learn how to save your marriage!

Psychological factors are responsible for about 10%-20% of all cases of erectile dysfunction, or ED. It is often a secondary reaction to an underlying physical cause. In some cases, the psychological effects of ED may stem from childhood abuse or sexual trauma. However, the most common psychological causes of ED include: Stress: Stress can be job-related, money-related, or the result of marital problems, among other factors. Tune in and learn how to deal with ED!

We should start by saying that there is no meaning in life outside of that which we can find by ourselves as a species. There isn’t any kind of objective meaning written in the stars, in a holy book or in sequences of DNA. What seems to prompt people to complain that life lacks meaning are particular varieties of unhappiness. Let’s consider some central examples:– You’re in a relationship, but the intensity you experienced at the start has long gone. You don’t seem to talk about anything important any more or share vulnerable feelings and ideas. It feels, as you put it, ‘meaningless’. Or else you’re single and, though you have many friends, every time you see them, the conversation seems shallow and trivial.– You are at university studying for a degree. You signed up for the course in part because you often feel confused about who you are and what you want. You thought that reading books and going to lectures would shine a light on things, but the topics are dull and disconnected from your confusion. You complain it feels meaningless. Let's discover the meaning of life!

Have you ever noticed how we often argue about the same things over and over again? How pointless, isn’t it? Nothing is ever accomplished by hashing over these identical and repetitive points. No one convinces anyone else, and both parties remain entrenched behind their emotions and the arguments that cover them. So what if we simply skipped the subject, let the provocation ( which it usually is) go by and talked about something else, something more positive? Of course this is easy to suggest and not always as easy to do, but it is possible to lift the discourse, find a subject that is perhaps not quite as personal, or doesn’t seem as personal. We can easily talk about what is happening in the wider world: there’s plenty of that to talk about; or talk about a book or a favorite moment in the past when there has not been discord? Or talk about something you are looking forward to in the future or a moment at work. Tune in and learn how to end circular arguments!

While intelligence is one of the most talked about subjects in psychology, there is no standard definition of what exactly constitutes intelligence. Some researchers have suggested that intelligence is a single, general ability. Others believe that intelligence encompasses a range of aptitudes, skills, and talents. Intelligence has been a controversial topic throughout psychology's history. Despite the substantial interest in the subject, there is still considerable disagreement about what components makeup intelligence. In addition to questions of exactly how to define intelligence, the debate continues today about whether accurate measurements are even possible. Tune in and learn about the dynamics of our our human intelligence!

We’ve all been impatient—and we’ve all made rash decisions when impatience got the better of us. We’ve left lines that were barely moving, only to get into an even slower line. We’ve taken the pizza out of the oven two minutes early because we just couldn’t wait. Or we’ve blown up a perfectly good relationship because we weren’t sure where it was going, and couldn’t stand the uncertainty. On the other hand, we’ve also been overly patient at times, sticking with projects, jobs, or relationships long after it made sense to do so. Tune in and learn about what makes patience important and why we become impatient!

Modern psychologists often use the word volition in preference to “Will”. Volition is the cognitive process by which an individual decides on and commits to a particular course of action. It is defined as purposive striving, and is one of the primary human psychological functions (the others being affection [affect or feeling], motivation [goals and expectations] and cognition [thinking]). Volitional processes can be applied consciously, and they can be automatized as habits over time. Most modern conceptions of volition address it as a process of action control that becomes automatized (see e.g., Heckhausen and Kuhl; Gollwitzer; Boekaerts and Corno). Willpower is the colloquial, and volition the scientific, term for the same state of the will; viz., an “elective preference”. When we have “made up our minds” (as we say) to a thing, i.e., have a settled state of choice respecting it, that state is called an immanent volition; when we put forth any particular act of choice, that act is called an emanant, or executive, or imperative, volition. When an immanent, or settled state of, choice, is one which controls or governs a series of actions, we call that state a predominant volition; while we give the name of subordinate volitions to those particular acts of choice which carry into effect the object sought for by the governing or “predominant volition”.Willpower is a concept that assumes we are under rational control, and the reduction of the same results in a lack of willpower. The fact is that we turn our rationality to serve our impulses or wishes, and sometimes have great willpower in pursuing them. Thus an alcoholic can be very cunning in achieving his determination to drink, and may display great willpower in achieving this goal. Tune in and learn how to re-activate. your personal will!