Drat Pack

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/01/brothers-grimm.mp3

Your third-or-fourth-favorite movie-related podcast is back for 2018, baby! The Why Watch crew welcomes in the new year with a pretty crappy Terry Gilliam jaunt, 2005’s The Brothers Grimm starring Matt Damon, Heath Ledger, and a whole bunch of wasted talent. There’s a whole magical forest’s worth of problems to dissect in this film, from the rambling plot to the sketchy characters to the ill-defined curse that the grotesque bones of all this hangs upon. On the bright side, there’s a hot buttered rum drink to keep everyone feeling drunk and warm and fuzzy, and everyone has some different ideas about how they’d make a better movie using the basic beans of this one. As always, rate us on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher, like us at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast, and visit us online at dratpack.com. BEANS!

BUTTERS GRUM

*Butter Batter

Cream all batter ingredients together and refrigerate overnight. Place batter in bottom of a pre-heated mug. Add rum and then water. Stir until batter is dissolved and float butter pat on top of the drink.

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/24.5-The-Closing-of-the-Year.mp3

The holiday season has wrapped up but we’re recording this while still in the thick of it all, so the Why Watch crew just decided to recap our year in terms of the best and the worst for both movies and cocktails. We also throw the first movie of 2018 out there along with a drink recipe and some of what to expect for the next twelve months. Rest assured that no matter how bleak and miserable things may seem, we really have nothing better to do with our time than this, so expect another year of this sort of thing! You can make our new year bright by rating us on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher, liking us at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast, and visiting our website at dratpack.com, which we resolve to maybe actually update more this year. Here’s hoping / happy new year!

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/24-Love-Actually.mp3

Whenever we get gloomy with the state of movies, it’s usually because we’re bombarded with half-baked concepts, threadbare plots, and shoddy characterization. General opinion makes out that one movie that manages to include all these concepts, 2003’s Love Actually, is a cherished Christmas classic, but we don’t see that. When we made two wintery cocktails and sat down to watch this very long anthology movie, none of our comments were messages of hate or revenge- they were all logical questions, like why is this movie trying to wedge the drama of death and broken relationships into a fluffy holiday romcom, and why do so many of the relationships feel upsetting or unbalanced, and why does it seem to think fat people are so horrible? Join us for our special Christmas episode as we try to lovingly reshape this ill-conceived movie, and like us on Facebook at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast and rate us on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher. Besides, we’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that Love Actually is all around this time of year, so you might as well listen to us discuss it anyway.

LOVE ACTUALLY IS MULLED AROUND

Combine apple cider, dry red wine, maple syrup, peppercorns, orange, and apple in a medium pot. Gently simmer over medium-low heat for 10 minutes.

NATIVITY LOBSTER

Fill 2 flutes .75 of the way with pink champagne or sparkling rose. Top with stout beer and garnish each with a small pinch ground espresso and an orange twist.

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/12/christmas-in-connecticut.mp3

The holliest jolliest time of year is upon us, and what better way to get yourself into the holiday spirit than by settling in a hot drink and a beloved Christmas movie? Well, maybe by also watching a movie you really like but still have a few problems with and then coming up with an idea on how to remake it! Leigh, Brendan, and Chris mull some wine and settle our brains for a viewing of the charming 1945 screwball romantic comedy Christmas in Connecticut starring Barbara Stanwyck, Dennis Morgan, and Sydney Greenstreet. How could the strengths of the movie be emphasized while removing the aspects that don’t play as well? Well, stop reading this synopsis and listen to the episode, you should know how this works by now! Also in this episode, our upcoming holiday movie and the two corresponding drink recipes. Listen to us, rate us, like us, and watch Christmas in Connecticut if you’re in the mood for something festive (but avoid the made-for-TV remake directed by Arnold Schwarzenegger at all costs).

HOT CATASTROPHE

Add the wine and cinnamon sticks, whole cloves, and allspice berries wrapped in cheesecloth to the slow cooker. Add the juice of 1.5 oranges to the cooker. Slice the remaining oranges into thin slices and add to the slow cooker with triple sec. Cover and cook on low for several hours. Before serving, mix in the whiskey and the brown sugar.

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Constantine.mp3

Thanksgiving is nearly upon us, and the Why Watch crew is not very thankful for one of their dumber duller movies, 2005’s looser-than-your-holiday-dinner-pants adaptation of the DC property Constantine starring Keanu Reeves. Why are Tilda Swinton and Peter Stormare the only magnetic presences? What’s a half-breed angel or demon, and how could they exist in the first place if angels or demons can’t come to Earth and bone a human? What is the villain’s plan exactly and why does it take over an hour to complete? We don’t know but we’ll also rework this dumb, dumb, dumb movie into something that would actually merit you focusing your eyeballs at it for over two hours. Also our cocktail is very intense and bitter and spicy and Leigh doesn’t really like it. Oh well. Help us to ascend to a better life by rating us on Apple Podcasts and Stitcher, liking us at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast and visiting our website at dratpack.com. Woe!

HOLY SHOTGUN

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/22.5-Weak-Spots.mp3

No, it’s not about adaptations. What a premature call THAT one was! Instead, we’re talking about weaknesses. Be it a guilty pleasure or a kick to the crotch, we all have our weak spots, and movies are no exception. In this mini episode, the Why Watch crew gathers to talk about what one thing will make them interested in a movie despite all other warning flags. As usual, there’s also the reveal of our post-Halloween horror-ish movie for November and the drink that will accompany it and a lot of banter and stuff! Submit to our joint weakness, the need for validation, and rate us on Apple Podcasts and Stitcher and like us at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast!

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/Dark-Shadows.mp3

Our annual Halloween spooktacular is back, and this time it’s featuring Dark Shadows! Ha ha, no, not the sequel to last month’s The Shadow,  but a 2012 Tim Burton movie based off a gothic 60s soap opera you probably don’t have much reason to remember. There’s a whole bunch of Burton’s usual gimmicks on display here, be they the washed-out colors, the Danny Elfman score, or the very talented and very wasted actors (and also Johnny Depp). All this gets covered along with some tasty alcoholic punch before we all suggest ways to shape Dark Shadows into a movie that’s better than “passably watchable at points.” In lieu of trick or treats, you can like us on Facebook at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast and rate us on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher. HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

COLLINSPORT PUNCH

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/21.5-What-s-In-a-Spook-1.mp3

This mini, the crew imprisons a spirit they found lurking in their apartment, magically binds it to the table of their game room, and uses the latest scientific techniques to determine what, in fact, makes it tick. Or something like that. Actually, it’s a lot of talk about what makes a movie scary to them, but really, it’s the same basic idea. As always, there’s plenty of drat chat about jump scares, atmosphere, and petit four dishes. Oh, and also a liquor-drenched punch for the upcoming Halloween spooktacular episode! BLEH!!! As always, like on facebook.com/whywatchpodcast, rate on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher, and prep your eyeballs for our retro-candy-colored-but-desaturated episode to follow.

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/The-Shadow-FINAL.mp3

Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The Shadow knows! And who remembers that weird time in the ’90s when a bunch of studios made unsuccessful movies based on old-time pulp heroes? The Shadow remembers! And who can take this weirdly incoherent character sketch of a movie and reshape it into something worth watching? Well, hopefully Leigh, Brendan, Chris and returning guest Michael Messina can, because that Shadow guy just keeps laughing at us. Also, we make a CRAZY drink with edible luster dust and dry ice and BOY is it wild. Anyway, you can learn what evil lurks in the hearts of the Why Watch crew by liking us on Facebook at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast and rating us on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

THE CLOUDED MIND

https://dratpack.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/Pitchers-Mound.mp3

For this mini, your pals at Why Watch decide to do something a little different. Each of them chooses a movie they wish had a sequel but never got one and pitches an idea for a sequel to it. Brendan tackles a dark animated movie from his childhood, Leigh continues an 80s sci-fi romance, and Chris of course posits a sequel to an over-the-top martial arts / historical drama / horror movie mess. All these free ideas for Hollywood, the next movie they’ll tackle, AND a drink recipe too? Sure, why not! As always, give likes at facebook.com/whywatchpodcast, ratings on Apple Podcasts or Stitcher, and return in two weeks for our Halloween warm-up movie!