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What happens when a chef and a mixologist start finishing each other’s…flavors?
Proof & Pairing happens, cocktail-first creations, wild creativity, and the most joyful culinary chaos you’ve ever heard.

In this episode of Ducking Realitea, I sit down with Todd and Chef Lamont of Proof & Pairing, a Bay Area-based cocktail-first food pairing experience that flips traditional food and drink pairings on their head. Instead of pairing cocktails with food, they build food around the drink, creating bold, creative flavor combinations rooted in mixology, culinary technique, and pure experimentation.

We get into their origin story in the Oakland hospitality scene, their work across private events, catering, and craft cocktails, and how their collaboration grew from industry connections into a full experience brand. From virtual cooking and cocktail classes during quarantine to high-end yacht parties and interactive tasting events, they’ve built something that blends fine dining, bartender culture, and experiential hospitality.

We also talk mixology vs. bartending, cocktail pairing vs. wine pairing, the rise of mocktails and non-alcoholic (NA) spirits, and how to create elevated drink experiences without losing that neighborhood bar energy. If you’re into craft cocktails, food pairing, culinary creativity, hospitality industry insights, or unique event experiences, this episode is packed with ideas, stories, and inspiration.

This one is hilarious, and insightful, a deep dive into cocktail culture, chef-driven food, and the creative process behind building unforgettable experiences.

Follow & connect with Proof & Pairing:
Proof & Pairing (Instagram): https://www.instagram.com/proofandpairing/

Montperi Catering (Lamont Perriman): https://www.instagram.com/montpericatering/

New Alchemy Distilling: https://www.newalchemysf.com/

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More content, events, and chaos coming soon 👀

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Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

The tea has been spiltz… and in this case, it’s hot. Like sauna hot.

This week I’m sitting down with my friend Chris—one of my favorite humans from Archimedes Banya—and we get into how a shy college kid going to nude beaches in Humboldt somehow turned into a 40+ year love affair with naturism, sauna culture, and one very specific kind of community you don’t really find anywhere else.

We start with nudity (obviously), but this isn’t really about being naked. It’s about being comfortable. It’s about walking into a room—whether it’s a sauna, a steam room, or just life—and not feeling like you have to perform.

Chris tells the story of meeting Misha Brodsky before the banya even existed—like, just some guy in a sauna saying “yeah I’m gonna build one in San Francisco.” And then… he actually did. Which is wild. And now here we are, with Archimedes Banya being one of the most unique wellness spaces in the U.S., built around Russian banya culture, heat, cold plunge, and community.

We also get into European sauna culture—because the U.S. is still a little weird about all of this. Think full-on textile-free saunas in Germany, massive spa complexes, quiet bathhouses in Barcelona… and yeah, you’re naked. Everyone’s naked. And somehow it’s the least interesting part of the experience.

Somewhere in the middle of all this, we talk about why the banya actually matters. For me, it’s where I go when my body is wrecked, when my brain won’t shut up, when I need to reset. Sauna, cold plunge, repeat. It’s simple, it’s grounding, and it works.

And then, because we can’t help ourselves, we start dreaming—about expanding sauna culture, building retreat spaces, bringing this kind of connection and healing to more people.

It’s real, it’s a little unhinged in the best way, and it’s one of those conversations that reminds you how good it feels to just… be a human.

Come hang out in The Pond 🐥

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

This live episode of Ducking Realitea presents: Touch of the Tism drops you right into Fireside in Alameda, where Siobhan, Holly, and Danielle bring their studio to the stage for Episode 7. What starts as a nerves-and-negronis kind of night quickly turns into a hilarious, heartfelt group therapy session with a bar full of friends, listeners, and a few unsuspecting new fans.

The trio share how the pod was born out of late‑night charcuterie boards, unhinged conversations, and the “I think I’ve got a touch of the tism” line that bonded them for life. They dig into their shared values—kindness, honesty, being weird, and absolutely not taking anyone’s shit—at work, in relationships, and in community. Danielle unpacks her “Prince Charming” short‑king disaster (plus the girlfriend he forgot to mention), and the crew uses it to talk intuition, boundaries, and choosing joy when people show their whole ass.

Between tequila trauma, Yeager war stories, sports‑owner ethics rants, and planning the next Guerneville escape, the women keep circling back to what matters: friendship, mutual protection, giving back (proceeds go to Meals on Wheels), and building a space where folks can laugh, be messy, and still feel held. It’s loud, loving, a little tipsy, and very real—exactly what Ducking Realitea promises.

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

A culty childhood. A goat ranch. Face scars. Suspension hooks.

And somehow… one of the most grounded people you’ll ever meet.

In this episode of Ducking Realitea, Siobhan sits down with Gage for a conversation that starts with first impressions, and quickly turns into something much deeper.

Gage shares what it was like growing up in a strict religious environment, navigating family instability, and eventually breaking away to build a life on his own terms. What looks like rebellion on the surface—tattoos, scarification, suspension—reveals itself to be something far more intentional: identity, control, healing, and self-expression.

They get into:

• the reality behind body modification (and why it’s often misunderstood)
• suspension culture, safety, and the engineering behind it
• growing up questioning belief systems
• surviving environments that don’t fit—and finding your own way out
• why judging people by appearance will almost always lead you in the wrong direction

This one is raw, a little chaotic, and unexpectedly thoughtful.

Also… yes, there’s a story about tattooing his throat at 16.

Come hang out in The Pond 🦆

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

This one goes everywhere, in the best way.

Siobhan sits down with Dr. Misha Brodsky: Soviet-born mathematician, UC Berkeley researcher, university administrator… and the man behind one of the most iconic banyas in the U.S.

From growing up in the Soviet Union—where travel was restricted and careers were essentially pre-determined—to being told “you can go, but you go forever,” Misha shares what it actually means to leave your country, lose your identity, and rebuild a life from scratch.

But this isn’t just a story about survival—it’s about what comes after.

We get into the American education system (and why it might be breaking), the science behind heat and cold exposure, and how something as simple as sitting in a hot room with strangers can completely shift your mental state.

Misha breaks down what makes a real Russian banya (hint: most saunas are doing it wrong), why ventilation matters more than temperature, and how he’s spent decades building a space centered around something we’re all craving right now: real human connection.

It’s part political history, part science lesson, and part love letter to steam, cold plunges, and the kind of community that makes you feel like yourself again.

Come hang out in The Pond 🦆

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

This episode is not light… but it’s important.

From being coached to lie to CPS at four years old to ending up on a psych ward as a teaching case, Tracy has survived more than most people can imagine, and somehow built a life full of love, art, and zero tolerance for bullshit.

Siobhan sits down with Tracy of Black Widow Bottles for a raw, unfiltered conversation about what it actually takes to rebuild your life when you were never given a safe place to start. They talk about childhood abuse, being failed by the system, running away and surviving on the streets, addiction, suicide attempts, and the long road back through therapy, medication, and doing the work.

But this isn’t just about survival, it’s about ownership, boundaries, and choosing a different path.

Tracy shares how she fought to rebuild her life, regain custody of her kids, and create meaning through her art, honoring life, grief, and memory through her work in wet taxidermy and pet memorials.

We also get into the complicated parts: grief that doesn’t resolve cleanly, losing her daughter to addiction, navigating family dynamics, and learning when to walk away from people who continue to cause harm.

If you’ve ever felt too broken, too far gone, or stuck in your past, this conversation is your reminder:

Healing is messy. It’s nonlinear. And it’s still possible.

🦆 Come sit with us in The Pond.

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

This episode was supposed to be a quick promo.

You know… remind you about the live show, keep it tight, move on.

Yeah—no. That’s not what happened.

This episode of Touch of the Tism is part promo, part group therapy, and fully unfiltered. We’re gearing up for our first live show on April 4—bands, tastings, a fundraiser for Meals on Wheels—and we’re equal parts excited and slightly spiraling.

Between joking about turning 26 (again), bad ankles, and how sleeping wrong in your 30s can ruin your life… we get into the real stuff.

Holly opens up about losing her friend Nick and the kind of grief that doesn’t move in a straight line—the late-night thoughts, the guilt, the “what could I have done differently” spiral. Danielle talks about anxiety, doomscrolling, and how writing things out (even the stuff you never send) can pull you back from the edge. Siobhan brings it home with real talk on depression, safe spaces, and why “it’s okay to not be okay” actually matters.

We also talk about what years behind the bar teach you—how to read people, how to show up for strangers, and how much emotional labor goes into just… being human.

It’s chaotic, hilarious, tender, and deeply real.

And honestly?
 This is exactly why we’re doing this live.

🦆 Ducking Realitea Presents: Touch of the Tism — LIVE
📍 Fireside Lounge, Alameda
🗓 April 4
🎙 Live show at 7 PM • 🎶 Music at 9 PM 

With Siobhan, Holly & Danielle, plus tastings from New Alchemy Distilling, Schilling Cider, and The Chaga Co—and a special appearance by 1ZKing.

Real conversations. Real people. No filter.

🎟 Grab your tickets now — limited capacity $20 cover. 

Come hang out in The Pond. We want you there.

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

She thought she’d be dancing on tour… instead she found herself producing events at Oprah’s house.

In this episode of Ducking Realitea, Siobhan sits down with experiential event producer Kristina Martinez to talk about what it actually takes to build a career behind the scenes of the moments people never forget.

From bartending triple shifts in New York to producing large-scale immersive events across the Bay Area, Kristina shares how she pivoted out of dance, followed the breadcrumbs, and built a career creating experiences that make people feel something.

We get into:

• What experiential event production really is
• The Oprah moment that changed everything
• Why hospitality teaches skills most people don’t have
• The pressure, chaos, and personalities behind big events
• Burnout, boundaries, and learning to say no
• The rise of immersive events, AI, and sensory design

This is one of those “casual conversations about serious sh*t” episodes about trusting your path, even when it doesn’t look how you planned.

Come hang out in The Pond 🦆

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

This one gets real.

I sat down with Brian Paine a Bay Area punk kid turned tech professional—who watched his life unravel after layoffs, grief, and a slow slide into depression. We talk about what it actually feels like when you lose your identity, your routine, and your sense of self… and how easy it is to quietly disappear.

Brian opens up about going from the loud, social “mayor of the group” to someone who could barely leave the house. No social media. No energy. Just trying to get through the day. Therapy wasn’t the path this time—he white-knuckled his way through content creation, streaming D&D and posting videos, until even that fell apart.

Then one night, after almost turning around four times, he walked into a show at the Ivy Room with nothing but his phone.

Behind the lens, something shifted. The noise in his head went quiet.

Photography, music, and community didn’t fix everything—but they gave him something to hold onto. And sometimes, that’s enough to keep going.

This episode is raw, funny, and uncomfortably honest in the best way—a love letter to punk, creativity, and doing the thing anyway.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, numb, or like you’re slipping… come hang out in The Pond. 

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.

Send us Fan Mail

Domestic violence doesn’t always look like the movies. Sometimes it’s quiet. Sometimes it’s confusing. And sometimes it slowly erodes your sense of self.

This week on Ducking Realitea, Siobhan sits down with Laura MacInnis, managing attorney at the Family Violence Law Center, to talk about the real dynamics of abuse, coercive control, and the long road survivors take to reclaim their lives.

Laura shares how her own emotionally abusive relationship in college shaped her path into nearly a decade of legal advocacy for survivors of domestic and sexual violence. Together, she and Siobhan unpack the subtle warning signs of abuse: isolation, manipulation disguised as love, financial dependence, and that constant feeling of walking on eggshells.

They also dive into why leaving abusive relationships is so difficult, the role shame and self-doubt play in keeping people stuck, and what actually helps survivors move forward: community support, financial stability, and being heard without judgment.

Laura also offers a behind-the-scenes look at the legal system, custody battles, myths about “parental alienation,” and how high-profile cases like Epstein and R. Kelly mirror patterns she sees every day in her work.

It’s a heavy conversation, but also a hopeful one.

Because healing is possible, community matters, and joy is one of the most powerful forms of resistance.

Support the show

Thanks for hanging in the pond, my ducks 🐤

Where we keep it honest, casual conversations about serious sh*t, and somehow still find a way to laugh through it.

If you felt something, send it to someone you love… or someone who might need a little push.

Follow along:
https://www.instagram.com/duckingrealitea/

And go out there and find your joy, even if it’s a little chaotic.

Stay curious, stay joyful…
you’re deeply loved, my ducks.