Earwash

This week we take a brief rest from the rigours of heavy political interviews with some notebook nonsense. Let your weary ears be rejuvenated by such intriguing concepts as the song of the onion men, Tilda Switnton's affable sneer, and echidnas sipping cherry cola.

In part VII of our groundbreaking miniseries exploring the tumultuous first months of Jennifer Cash's term on the Bexley Parish School Board, Jennifer talks about how extracurricular activities have changed under her administration. In this exclusive interview, hear what Jennifer considers to be the only acceptable sport for girls, why chess clubs are forbidden, and what book clubs do when all books are banned

In part 6 (or VI, as only Roman numerals are now permitted) of our groundbreaking miniseries exploring the tumultuous first months of Jennifer Cash's term on the Bexley Parish School Board, Jennifer talks about her changes to the science and art curriculum, which bring in the latest breakthroughs in Christian science, the removal of DEI from math(s), and protect against the unexpected side effects of theatre.

In part 5 of our groundbreaking miniseries exploring the tumultuous first months of Jennifer Cash's term on the Bexley Parish School Board, Jennifer talks about her changes to the humanities curriculum. There is a lot to learn: the rules of anti-woke Scrabble, how to speak a foreign language without speaking a foreign language, and how Christopher Columbus was the first man to circumscribe, circumbobulate and circumcise the world.

This week's episode is a welcome break from the hard-hitting political journalism. Instead, relax in a bath of warm nonsense from Douglas's notebook, with recurring motifs of socks, sandwiches, and what can only be described as a rhapsody of llamas, farmers and bananas.

In part 4 of our groundbreaking miniseries exploring the tumultuous first months of Jennifer Cash's term on the Bexley Parish School Board, Jennifer talks about her first contentious policy decision, and how it led to unexpected geese, Vietnamese complications and the revelation of a child called Ketchup.

In part 3 of our groundbreaking miniseries exploring the tumultuous first months of Jennifer Cash's term on the Bexley Parish School Board, Jennifer talks about the changes she has made to the district's library, including her reason for banning particular books, her views on librarians and her new cost-saving way of heating schools.

In part 2 of our groundbreaking miniseries exploring the tumultuous first months of Jennifer Cash's term on the Bexley Parish School Board, Jennifer talks about abolishing school uniforms, free expression, and what the significance of a boy in a pink shirt is.

In part 1 of our groundbreaking miniseries exploring the tumultuous first months of Jennifer Cash's term on the Bexley Parish School Board, Jennifer talks about taking charge, making change, and how Big Clock tried to put a stop to her agenda.

A delve into Douglas's notebook gives us such unexpected delights as rudimentary side-toes, spider ticklers and carbon neutral witch burnings. There is no connection. There is no context. There is only distilled essence of a messy subconscious mind.