Empowered Way Podcast

Hello Empowered Wayers!

I come from a family of successful attorneys and entrepreneurs. I have noticed distinct differences between how my brothers and nephews approach wealth building and how I approach it. It’s a fascinating dance between two contrasting approaches when creating financial abundance. I like to call them the masculine and feminine energies of wealth building, and trust me, magic happens when you learn to work with both.

The Masculine Path: Spreadsheets, Systems, and Statistics

Picture this: You're sitting at your desk, surrounded by spreadsheets and performance metrics. You've got your five-year plan mapped out, your ROI calculations are pristine, and your systems are running like a well-oiled machine. This is the masculine approach in action, and it's powerful stuff.

I once met a wealth manager named Peter who embodied this perfectly. His office walls were covered in charts tracking market trends, and he could tell you the exact percentage return on every investment he'd ever made. His clients loved his methodical approach – everything was measurable, trackable, and systematic.

But here's the thing: Peter hit a wall. Despite his impressive systems and strategies, he started losing clients to competitors who, on paper, had less impressive returns. Why? Because he was missing something crucial.

The Feminine Flow: Intuition, Connection, and Organic Growth

Now, let me introduce you to Sarah, a successful business owner who built her wealth in a completely different way. Walking into her office feels like entering a collaborative hub. Instead of charts, you'll find comfortable seating areas where she hosts community gatherings. Her wealth-building strategy? It's all about relationships, intuitive decision-making, and creating value through genuine connections.

Sarah's approach might make traditional financial advisors scratch their heads. She talks about "feeling" when a business opportunity is right and building wealth through community support. Her growth isn't always linear – it flows like a river, finding new paths when needed.

When One Path Leads to a Dead End

Both Peter and Sarah hit similar obstacles, just from different directions. Peter’s purely masculine approach left him struggling with burnout and missing opportunities that didn't fit his rigid criteria. His clients felt like numbers in a spreadsheet rather than real people with dreams and fears.

Sarah, on the other hand, sometimes found herself overextended, saying yes to projects that felt right but didn't make financial sense. Her natural ability to build relationships was amazing, but without clear boundaries and metrics, she often undervalued her worth.

The Dance of Integration

But here's where it gets interesting. Both Peter and Sarah transformed their approach to wealth building by embracing elements of the other's style. Peter learned to trust his gut sometimes and invest in building genuine relationships with his clients. Sarah implemented systems to track her progress and started setting clearer boundaries.

The result? Their wealth-building strategies became more robust and, surprisingly, more enjoyable. It's like they each found their rhythm in a dance that requires both structure and flow.

It reminds me of the Ying and Yang symbol. Both sides are equal and of the same importance. Choosing one side to the exclusion of the other leaves the whole unbalanced and misaligned.

Both energies are important and are key to building sustainable wealth when used at the correct time.

How to Find Your Balance

So how do you start integrating both approaches? Here's what I've seen work:

* Start Where You're Comfortable, Then Stretch If you're naturally drawn to spreadsheets and systems, great! Keep those, but try adding one relationship-building activity to your week. Maybe it's a casual coffee meeting where you don't talk about numbers at all. If you're more relationship-focused, start with one simple metric to track weekly.

* Create Your Hybrid Tools One of my favorite examples is what I call the "Heart-Head Check." Before making a business decision, look at both the numbers (masculine) and your gut feeling (feminine). Rate each on a scale of 1-10. If either is too low, pause and investigate why.

* Build Balanced Routines Try this: Start your day with both meditation (feminine) and planning (masculine). End it with both metrics review (masculine) and gratitude practice (feminine). You'll be amazed at how this simple routine starts shifting your approach to wealth building.

The New Way Forward

Think of wealth building like cooking a great meal. You need both precise measurements (masculine) and intuitive seasoning (feminine). Too much of either, and the dish doesn't work. But find the right balance, and you create something remarkable.

I've seen people transform their relationship with money when they stop trying to be either/or and start embracing both/and. The most successful wealth builders I know can read a financial statement with precision while maintaining deep, authentic relationships. They can create detailed five-year plans while remaining flexible enough to pivot when intuition calls.

Remember, it's not about abandoning your natural strengths – it's about expanding your toolkit. Whether you're more Peter or Sarah, there's room to grow in both directions. The sweet spot in wealth building isn't found in choosing between masculine and feminine approaches – it's in the beautiful dance of bringing them together.

Your journey to wealth can be both structured and flowing, both measured and intuitive. It's time to embrace the power of both. After all, why choose one when you can have the best of both worlds?

To your prosperity,

Kathryn

P.S. If you don’t understand the feminine approach to wealth building, my latest book, “The Money Tree” will help. It’s a parable about money and wealth that will leave you reconsidering what “wealth” really means.

As one Amazon reviewer shared: Don’t let the joy and ease of this read fool you, this tale packs a punch! It’s a veritable powerhouse of deeply moving ideas and profoundly useful tools. The money tree is a story that seems so simple on the surface, but if you let it, it will show you the deepest currents of money energy, beingness and living in abundance!

Hello Empowered Wayers!

Have you ever stopped at a red light and really looked at the driver next to you? Not just a glance, but truly looked - and wondered about their story? Where they're heading, what weighs on their heart, who's waiting for them at home? In that fleeting moment, did you catch yourself making snap judgments about their appearance, their car, their expression - and then feel that familiar shame of realizing you've done it again?There's a word for when judgment dissolves into awareness: sonder. It's that sudden, striking realization that every stranger you pass is living a life as rich and complicated as your own. Their world is as vivid to them as yours is to you - filled with worries, dreams, routines, and relationships you'll never know about.

Each person carries their own universe within them, as vast and mysterious as the stars.

The Prison of Your Perspective

When you're suffering - whether from loss, anxiety, or life's countless other challenges - your pain can become a prison. But it's not just the pain that traps you; it's the walls you build around it. You resist what is, pushing back against reality with thoughts like "This shouldn't be happening" or "I can't accept this." You judge yourself harshly for not being "stronger" or "better." You judge others for having it easier, for not understanding, for moving through life apparently untouched by the weight you carry.Last week, I was sitting in a cafe, nursing my coffee and wrestling with personal disappointment. The weight of it felt unbearable. My mind was a cruel judge, sentencing me to endless replays of what I should have done differently, how I should have been better. Then I noticed an elderly woman at the next table, her hands wrapped around her cup, staring into the middle distance with such profound sadness that it stopped my internal trial cold.What was her story? What grief or worry occupied her thoughts? In that moment of wondering - that moment of sonder - my own pain didn't disappear, but it shifted. The harsh voice of judgment softened into curiosity, and my heart opened just enough to let in a profound truth: everyone is doing the best they can with the light they have.

Judgement is destructive - of yourself and others. When you judge, you create a world of separation. You sort humanity into categories of better and worse, worthy and unworthy, strong and weak. But these divisions exist only in your mind, and they serve as barriers to the very connection your heart desperately seeks.Every judgment we make simplifies the complex reality of human life. You forget that everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about, including yourself.

As I considered these thoughts, I looked back at the woman. She happened to glance up and our eyes met. I nodded and sent her loving energy. As we sat in that cafe, life swirling around us, our hearts connected for a brief moment. She stood up to leave, and her energy felt a bit lighter. I stayed for a few more minutes to process the exchanage and the lesson I learned:

The shift from judgement and worry to sonder and wonder is always available.

The connection to another’s pain lessened my own and theirs.

The Liberation of Looking Outward

Sonder isn't just an interesting psychological phenomenon - it's a gateway to freedom from the twin prisons of resistance and judgment. When you truly grasp that every person you see is fighting their own battles, something profound happens:

* Your suffering loses its sense of personal persecution. You stop asking "Why me?" because you realize it's not just you - it's everyone, each in their own way.

* Your judgments dissolve in the face of shared humanity. How can you maintain your harsh assessments when you recognize that each person's story is as nuanced and challenging as your own?

* You gain perspective on your resistance to reality. If everyone is dealing with something. Perhaps the problem isn't that life challenges you, but you expect it shouldn't.

Expectations are judgement's cousins. When you find that your expectations about yourself and others lead to judgement, it's time to choose again.

Finding Peace in the Lives of Others

The next time you find yourself trapped in judgment or struggling against reality, try this: Look around. Really look. At the grocery store clerk checking out items with tired eyes - what dreams did they have to put on hold? At the businessman power-walking down the street, his face tense with worry - what keeps him up at night? At the young mother in the park, stealing a moment of quiet while her child plays - what battles does she fight that no one sees?Remember: each of them has a story as complex as yours. Each of them has felt pain as deep as yours. Each of them has judged themselves as harshly as you have judged yourself. And somehow, they're still here, still moving forward, still trying their best in a world that often demands more than any of us can give.

As your perspective shifts from your inner world to wonder about what others are experiencing, you realize that we are in this life together. No one has the answers and no one knows the best choices for your life. Just as you don’t know the choice they should make.

A Different Choice

Sonder challenges you to see beyond your own perspective and embrace the lives unfolding around you. You can let their stories remind you that suffering is not a personal failure, but a shared journey. And in that sharing - in that profound recognition of our common humanity - you might find the strength to loosen your grip on how you think things "should" be.The next time you feel that familiar tightening of resistance or the harsh voice of judgment rising within, try looking outward instead of inward. Let yourself wonder about the lives around you. Let their presence remind you that you're part of something larger than your own struggle. Let your curiosity about their stories gently dissolve the walls between you and the world.This is not a magic solution to suffering. But it is a door to a larger room, where the air is easier to breathe, where your resistance to reality might soften, and where the harsh voice of judgment can gradually be replaced by the gentle whisper of compassion - for others, and finally, for yourself.After all, we're all in this together - even when we forget to remember it. And perhaps that forgetting and remembering is part of the journey we share, each of us finding our way back to compassion, one moment of sonder (and wonder) at a time.

Repeat this mantra to remind you of these truths:

I am you. You are me. We are one. All is well.

Many blessings on your journey,

Kathryn

P.S. One of my favorite meditations is “The Snow Globe.” Please listen to is as a way to see others and their stories. How you feel about them may surprise you! 

Hello Empowered Wayers!

Have you ever felt a desire that made you feel alive, but your rational mind squashed it like a bug?

Why do we allow our minds to direct us, when it’s our heart who knows the way?

The world screams for our attention, our money, and our allegiance to societal norms. When you are a good follower, the end result is always the same. You lose yourself in the outer focus of acceptance, achievement, and accolades.

But your heart knows the way…for you. No one can tell you what your heart already knows. Only you can decipher it’s whispers, nudges, and direction. 

You are Here for a Reason

When you allow yourself to dream, what appears on the screen of your mind? What calls to you to follow it, even though logic and reason both deliver a hard “no”?

That dream you have tucked away is yours to fulfill. 

Imagine the Universe creating a giant puzzle and then throwing it up in the air. The pieces fall into different hearts and can only be rejoined to the whole by that person’s heart.

You hold a Divine puzzle piece in your heart and only you can bring it to manifest in the world of time and space. It’s your mission and purpose. 

Take time to listen to your heart. Go outside and be still. Breathe deeply and feel the wind on your skin. Allow your body to be your guide and your thoughts will become quiet. When you can hear your heartbeat, you know you have arrived.

Because you have all the answers inside. 

Be well,

Kathryn

Hello Empowered Wayers!

I have been on a pilgrimage through the sacred sites of France. Starting in Marseilles, we traveled to St. Baume, Sainte-Marie-de-la-Mer, Rennes la Chateau, Carcassonne, and finally Chartres. We visited the places known to revere the sacred feminine.

I was moved by the stories shared for centuries and the energy of each site. The reverence reserved for these holy sites was humbling and inspiring.

The surprising lessons of my pilgrimage occurred in Chartres. Out of 25 people, 1/3 of the group got COVID, including yours truly. All of the fear and judgment from 2020 came roaring back, and it threw me. Isolation, disappointment, and resentment was my experience, until I remembered a poem by Rumi, called “The Guest House.”

I raged against reality

As I navigated COVID and the emotions it carried, a reckoning occurred. I had to look myself in the mirror and acknowledge I was now separate from the group. Old fears of abandonment and rejection came roaring into my awareness, threatening to suffocate me with their incessant barrage of lack, limitation, and unworthiness.

The assault intensified when I listened to a recording of the group sessions. At the end of one session, the spiritual leader asked for prayers “for those of us who were not ready to be here.”

That statement ignited a tsunami of anger, resentment, and judgment. What did she mean, “I wasn’t worthy to be there”? My spiritual health was being devalued by my physical health. This blatant dismissal was not what I paid thousands of dollars to experience.

That night, I woke up at 2:00 a.m. and the entire nasty monologue started again in my head. It wasn’t until I took a deep breath and asked myself, “What if she was right? that the incessant barrage of indignation, judgment, and shame stopped. Maybe I wasn’t ready to be with the group. The cold hard fact that I couldn’t escape was that I had COVID and they didn’t.

Was there more to this unexpected situation? Were lessons lurking behind my messy emotions? Why was this so hard?

I live in the Guest House

As I waited for an answer, I suddenly had the urge to look up a poem by Rumi, called “The Guest House.”

The Guest House by Rumi

This being human is a guest house.Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,some momentary awareness comesas an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,who violently sweep your houseempty of its furniture,still, treat each guest honorably.He may be clearing you outfor some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,meet them at the door laughing,and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,because each has been sentas a guide from beyond.

Reading this poem after my emotional storm calmed and anchored me. I was able to breathe through the residue of anger and realize that I could treat each emotion as a guest and guide from beyond. My perspective slowly shifted from injustice and fear to love and compassion.

I learned that I am more than my body or circumstances, bigger than other people’s opinions, filters or attitudes. But the ability to welcome the perceptions of judgment, fear, and shame as honored guests did not come easily.

It was only after I walked the Chartres labyrinth that I realized I was holding onto my own perception of these events. I had made the mistake of adopting other’s fears and behaviors as the definition of my value and worth. There was something waiting for me behind the curtain of my small self.

The Labyrinth as a Forgiveness Experience

The stone labyrinth inside the Chartres Cathedral is the largest inlaid labyrinth in the world. As you stand inside the Cathedral, the immense space created by 12 story columns is breathtaking. Designed to inspire awe and worship, the Cathedral has been the destination of pilgrims for 1,000 years.

The highlight of our trip to Chartres was to walk the labyrinth at night after the Cathedral was closed to the public. Our group of 25 would be the only participants, accompanied by singing from three vocalists. Sadly, the COVID group of 7 women were not allowed to join this sacred ritual (even though we could have walked with masks, after the other group finished).

My guest house was full of resentment, anger, and a strong sense of injustice. I struggled to meet these unwelcome guests “at the door, laughing.”

The afternoon of the group walk, a strong thunderstorm roared through Chartres. Strong winds and heavy rains knocked out the electricity in the entire region. After the storm, I walked through the streets of the Old Town, and again saw my attachment to the unwelcome guests. I knew that the group’s labyrinth walk could be in jeopardy, and I prayed they would be able to have that sacred experience.

As soon as I focused on the others instead of my own situation, I felt a release and shift in perspective. And the thought emerged, “What if I am blessed to have this experience?”

New possibilities opened before me. Every since I can remember, my core fears are abandonment and rejection. I joined this trip with the intention to finally release them. What if this was the reason I got COVID? It didn’t have anything to do with how I was being treated or the perceived injustice. Instead, this situation was the perfect opportunity to finally see beyond these ancient fears and release them.

As I stopped to consider the new sense of awareness, another thought hit me like a freight train. I was in the perfect place to heal. Chartres has spiritual energies that have helped millions of people for thousands of years. Why not me?

That night, as the group walked the labyrinth, I forgave myself for believing fear’s message of unworthiness. I surrendered my attachment to victim hood and released my judgment of others. Finally, I meditated to reconnect with the Presence of Love.

During the meditation, a quote from Eckhart Tolle was shared.

Only Presence can undo the past in you and

thus transform your state of consciousness.

The next day, we walked the labyrinth during the public hours. The path leads to the center, represented by six petals. The location of the center is a holy space where you communicate directly with God. As you leave the center and retrace your steps, you carry Divine Energy with you.

It was crowded but I discovered myself again, standing in the center of the six petals. Tears flowed down my face as I heard, “Give it all to me.” The Presence of Love was with me all along, waiting for me to release and receive.

And so, I did. I just let go. It was easy when I found something bigger to hold me - Love.

The Takeaway

I hope my pilgrimage has inspired you to look at your shadows and fears. No matter how or why you created them, please know that there is a loving Presence standing behind them, waiting for you to let go of the past and receive Love.

Be grateful for whoever comes,because each has been sentas a guide from beyond.

And maybe, just maybe, you can let it all go. And see yourself and your life as a Guest House, filled with experiences and emotions that are sent to you as a guide from beyond. As your perspective shifts and you regain your balance, gratitude fills you to the brim.

You are here to experience this messy, unpredictable, glorious life. In the darkest of hours, as you release your grip on what you think you know, a thought will appear. You came from Love and you are Loved. Become the Presence of Love and your heart opens to receive.

Grab hold of that thought and welcome it, because it came “as a guide from beyond.”

Many blessings,

Kathryn

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Hello Empowered Wayers!

When I was five years old, my brother and I wanted to learn how to ride our bicycles without training wheels. When our dad took off the small wheels that had held us upright, he stopped and asked, “Are you sure?” We both nodded and couldn’t wait for the morning. 

The next day, our mom took us to the curb in front of our house. We each had our bikes poised and ready to take off, but she wanted to teach us one at a time. My brother climbed on his bike and after some pushing from behind and encouragement from us, he wobbled down the street. As he picked up speed, he straightened and sat tall. The grin on his face was enough for me to cry, “Now it’s my turn!”

But she had to go back inside the house…something about something. All I knew was that he got to take that next significant step forward on the journey to more…and I had to wait. We went back inside, and I just couldn’t handle it.

My five-year-old emotional self couldn’t see through the tears. Why did he always go first? What was more important than me learning to ride my bike? The questions were making me more upset because I didn’t have any answers.

When I finally calmed down and took a deep breath, something broke through my misery. I had a sense of loving energy surrounding me. One minute, I felt lost, rejected, and alone...and the next minute, I experienced love, protection, and safety.

I grabbed my brother, and we went outside to our bikes, still leaning against the curb. I climbed on my bike and asked him to push me. He looked a bit worried but he could see the determination in my eyes and knew better than to argue. He ran along beside me, pushing as I pedaled until I broke free.

I believed I could fly!

I have reflected many times on that moment of being lost in myself, alone, angry and frustrated, then feeling surrounded by love. That loving energy blasted my little self apart, and I stepped into a union with something much bigger than me.

What happened?

Looking back on that defining moment, I now realize what I was doing as I cried against the apparent injustice. I asked questions that led nowhere. And the word I used kept me caught in my upset.

This word has always been used by humans to try to make sense of their life. It is asked to relieve pain and suffering, but it actually does the exact opposite. This word always takes you down a spiraling vortex of negative emotions, leading to nowhere.

What is that word asked through the millennia?

WHY?

Why did this happen? Why am I such an idiot? Why does he get everything he wants and I have to wait? Why? Why? Why?

Can you see why asking “Why” always leads to more problems (pun intended)? If you come up with an answer, it is usually at your own expense. You become the victim because you are looking outside of yourself for the reason this happened.

Let’s look at the word itself, and you will see a clue about its potential destructiveness when it is directed at yourself or your life. Take a moment and write the word “why” on a piece of paper. Use all lower case letters, then sit back and let me know when you see it.

Did you write the letters “w-h-y” with the curly part of the letter “y” going back toward the front of the word? Most people do. And that is the clue. The very letters that make up the word “why” turn back in on themselves! Asking “Why?” always turns the answer back toward the question.

Whenever you play the victim’s role, you forget your power.

Instead of asking “Why?” that loving energy so many years ago showed me a different question to ask. It also reminded me I was safe, worthy, and well-loved. As long as I started from that place of worthiness, I could do nothing wrong. I remained in my power to choose and create. The empowering question is also one word, but it leads to expansion and growth, not despair.

What one word should you use to tap into your creative powers, heal yourself and your world?

HOW?

How can I learn to ride my bike now? (get my brother to help me and try) How can I do this better? How can I become the person I dream of being?

Asking “How?” taps into your creative juices. Your mind immediately begins to supply answers to questions starting with “How” and it liberates you to approach problems with a solution mindset. It also taps into your own self-worth because it forces you to lean on yourself, instead of blaming the outside world. As you take steps toward your goal, you reinforce your own creative abilities to become more.

Train yourself to ask empowering questions that lead to expansion and growth.

It transforms your worldview.

It all starts with your self-talk, the conversations you have with yourself. Notice if the tone is harsh and judgmental. Write down the thoughts swirling in your head, take a moment, then ask yourself if there is another way to look at them. How can you accept what happened and still be whole?

Retell the story from your new perspective and notice how it makes you feel. Take responsibility for your words and actions, and forgive yourself. What have you learned? How would you have acted now that you have these insights?

Everyone is on a journey of discovery. When you learn to stand in your worthiness instead of victimhood, a shift occurs internally. From the other side of the shift, you see the situation from a different perspective that allows other possibilities to arise.

Without the training wheels of self-doubt, judgment, and lack, you can fly!

To your prosperity,

Kathryn

Hello Empowered Wayers!

Today, I want to share a personal story. It touches on a controversial subject, but I hope you can feel my sincerity and nonjudgment.

When our daughter was about 8 years old, we spent summer weekends at a lake close to our home. After a day of swimming, skiing, and being lazy, we would go out to eat.

There was a restaurant a few miles up the road that was Lauren’s favorite place. It was next to the lake, and there were cabins and peacocks. But that wasn’t what attracted her - it was the horses that were in a pasture a short walk away.

We became regulars and soon grew fond of one of the waitresses. Sue was in her late 30’s, a petite woman with blue eyes that sparkled and a laugh that made everyone smile. She always took the time to visit with us and she made sure that we sat in her section.

One evening, as soon as we walked in, I could tell that Sue was not herself. Instead of greeting us as old friends, she mumbled a hello. I glanced at my husband with a look of concern, but we let it go as we sat down. And then, it happened.

I received one of those intuitive nudges. At first, I tried to ignore it, but I finally gave in. Something was wrong with Sue and I was being urged to help.

I excused myself from the table and walked over to where Sue was standing. I touched her arm and asked her if she had a minute. Her eyes finally met mine and tears gleamed, ready to fall. She took a deep breath and asked the other waitress to cover for her.

We walked outside onto the deck that overlooked the lake. I waited for her to speak, but she kept hugging herself, rocking side to side. Just as I was about to speak, she said in a shaky voice, “I’m pregnant.”

Obviously, this wasn’t joyous news. Sue became more upset and blurted out, “I can’t take care of a baby!” She started sobbing and I hugged her until the wave of emotion passed. She pulled back from me and declared with false determination, “I’m getting rid of it. It’s too much for me.” Her false bravado broke open and she cried desperately, “I can’t raise a child on my own.”

The fear in her eyes said it all. Her mind was telling her all the reasons why this couldn’t happen and she was listening. But there was another aspect to this situation that she may not have considered.

I nodded, knowing an abortion was the next logical step. I took a deep breath and said a quick prayer. I looked into her eyes and asked softly, “Is that what your heart wants you to do?”

She shook her head no. “But I can’t afford a baby!” Fear and desperation became her armor. I knew the next words I said would impact more than one life.

“Did you know that we adopted Lauren?” She shook her head and glanced back at the window, watching Lauren play a game of paper football with her father. I went on. “The birth mother considered an abortion, but decided to have the baby and find a wonderful set of adoptive parents.” Sue listened intently. I laughed and finished, “The way we connected with the birth mother was a miracle, but that’s another story.”

She turned to go back inside, giving me one last hug. “Thank you,” she whispered.

It was many months later that we returned to the restaurant. I looked for Sue, and as soon as she saw me, she rushed over. She was her old self, eyes sparkling and a sharing a laugh that made everyone smile.

She hugged me and said, “I decided to have the baby. It was the best decision I ever made!” I was thrilled and listened as she gushed about her son. Photos of a cute, chubby boy with a grin like his mother’s were soon shared.

The Takeaway

When someone is an abstract idea, it’s much easier to dismiss them. That is true of racial interactions and for unexpected pregnancies. Instead of following your mind, take a moment and imagine the future. Then listen to your heart and allow it to speak. You may be surprised at what you hear.

Fear constricts and limits. Love expands and grows.

It’s always your choice in every moment which voice you listen to. The voice of fear or the voice of love. Give love space and time to express herself.

Reason is powerless in the expression of Love. - Rumi

Before making a permanent and irrevocable decision, allow love to be heard.

Blessings,

Kathryn

Hello Empowered Wayers!

Welcome to all the new subscribers - I am so glad you are here. Hopefully, you have taken a minute to look around Empowered Way, dive into an article or two, and come away with a new thought, idea, or validation of your worth.

Today, I want to share a person story that illustrates how you can adopt money beliefs that aren’t even yours. When you begin to realize that you are living someone else’s beliefs (and discover they don’t resonate), what do you do next?

You start exploring your ideas and concepts about money. You begin to appreciate how you create value for others. And you don’t get caught up in the comparison game of numbers. That’s for starters…

When I hit a wall

“Why are you still working in that job?” My father’s voice was soft, but it carried a tinge of judgment. My parents had driven to San Antonio to visit, and we were sitting in the living room of our historic home, discussing my future.

I couldn’t look at him. I always turned away in the face of criticism, trying to deflect the wave of shame I felt for not measuring up. Turning away only made the shame rise up in me, choking my voice and shattering my confidence.

It was all I could do to mummer quietly, mostly to the floor, “But I enjoy it.”

That meager attempt at defending myself was crushed as soon as the words came out of my mouth. My father was a self-made man, proud of what he accomplished, and determined that his only daughter would be successful. The problem was that his definition of success was never mine.

“Just look at this place!” Now, our home was under attack, the beauty of the wood used in 1898 to build the walls being washed with the dark stain of judgment. 

I looked around our historic home and saw it through my parents’ eyes. The high ceilings and tall, narrow windows seem to accent the yards of wood that were bare, waiting to be covered in sheetrock. The different colors of paint, peeling wallpaper, and hardwood floors that dully lead into the kitchen spoke of limitation, not restoration.

Our historic home, built from trees that were hundreds of years old when they were harvested, was an uncut jewel. We saw the potential and dreamed; he saw the current reality and judged from his perspective.

Much like he was doing to me.

He was on a roll. “How are you going ever to fix this place up when you only make $10,000 a year?” 

There it was. The measuring stick of my value. The barometer by which he measured all of us, my three brothers and me. 

Looking back on this scene, almost forty years later, I can see the hidden dynamics pulling the strings of my father’s beliefs and words. I knew he grew up desperately poor because his father died in 1918 from the Spanish flu. At one point during the Great Depression, the only way that his mother could provide food for her three boys was to hope one of her relatives would bring potatoes.

He called it “the potato winter.” Imagine eating potatoes to survive. 

It was during this desperate time that they lived in an older neighborhood. Their house was built sometime in the late 1800s, and it was cold, drafty, dingy, and depressing. 

Now, looking back on that conversation about my $10,000 job, I can understand why he was so adamant that I “do something with my life.” The setting of our visit must have reminded him of those depressing days of wondering where the next meal was coming from (please, don’t let it be potatoes). His entire being opposed anyone having to experience what he did, and he was only reflecting that motivation to me.

It was all about him. I just never realized that until later.

“If you are willing to look at another person’s behavior toward you as a reflection of the state of their relationship with themselves, rather than a statement of your value as a person, then you will, over a period of time, cease to react at all.”   

- Yogi Bhahan

What I Learned

I have since forgiven myself for turning his disappointment into my shame and doubt. Those were choices I made at that moment that impacted my life decisions for many years.

It wasn’t until I began my spiritual journey that I discovered my awareness of my Self. I also discovered that I had the power to release the limiting stories that I created.

My father was a loving man who provided well for his family. He was determined to create a “better” life, which to him meant earning enough money so there would always...be enough.

His approach to money was to work hard, never give up and do as much as humanly possible to succeed. It was all about doing first, having success, then being happy.

My brothers succeeded using the Do-Have-Be formula. But I always seemed to miss a crucial step.

The problem for me, as a woman, was translating my father’s lessons about money into something I could relate to, so I could discover and create from my source of power.

Money has a feminine side

For many years, money and I didn’t get along. It was a strained relationship that I tried to control with doing. Focus more, work harder, strive for the next promotion, raise, etc. Even though I followed all of the “rules,” it never felt comfortable. I always seemed to be the one asking for money instead of standing in my creative potential as a woman.

It wasn’t until I discovered that money has a feminine side that I began to feel equal. I looked behind the curtain and discovered that money loves to play with creativity, joy, and compassion. I also discovered that women have natural superpowers to discover and cultivate as they step into a healthy relationship with money.

It’s as if women have a secret bank account of wealth accessible at any time, but no one told us about it. Instead, we have been taught that the only way to be with money is to use masculine energy, the doing energy of planning, data-supported step-by-step goals.

Instead of beginning with doing, women learn to start with being. Women create from the inside-out, so what better way to approach money than to step inside to communicate?

Since life is all about you and your growth, why not realign your relationship with money? It’s never too late to peacefully create abundant wealth.

A Bonus for Empowered Wayers

One of my most popular courses is Alchemize Your Wealth in 5 Days. It is a short course with deep impact, because you come away with a different perspective about money.

Just for Empowered Way subscribers, use the coupon code “wealth” to access the course for free. And please let me know your insights, feedback, etc.

Blessings,

Kathryn

Hello Empowered Wayers :-)

As the summer rolls to a close and kids return to school, the rhythm of life changes. Instead of lazy days and fun, we’re back to scheduling and juggling the myriad of details that are part of being parents.

My intent isn’t to share a new productive process or system to streamline your mornings. You already have a way to handle the chaos and still be available for your children.

My goal today is to remind you that you can only give what you have received.

Self-care is Essential

Women are conditioned to put others before themselves. I know from an early age, I was trained to be the helper, the generous one who gave to others. These are wonderful traits, but they become suffocating if you have nothing to give.

My journey of self-care is too long to share. What I settled on was daily meditation, mindfulness, and journaling. When I fall out of my practice, I become scattered and anxious. I forget that I am not my worries and my monkey mind and ego control.

It’s not a pretty sight or a great way to live.

When I become ego-centrenic, it damages my relationships. I only see a small slice of reality and forget that there is a larger perspective of knowing. My energy shrinks and I am not a pleasant person. My parenting skills decrease and I don’t listen well.

After I began meditating daily, my worries receded and I listened to my intuition. I set daily intentions that usually worked out, and my family was much happier.

If you have never meditated before, perhaps it is time to begin. I created a 21-Day Meditation Challenge that helps you create and solidify the habit of meditating daily. The meditations are available to you immediately after purchase. When you download the Gumroad app, you can access the next day’s meditation. Most of them are short but they build on each other. You will also receive daily emails that also contain the link to that day’s meditation, as well as specific journal prompts to help you dive deeper.

All me to share a story of what being present as a parent looks like.

Shift the Focus

When my daughter was in middle school, she was involved in cheer leading, soccer, and drama. She eventually had to choose between three activities she loved, because the coaches and teacher were upset when she had a conflict.

She is the perennial people-pleaser, so having to choose between these activities upset her deeply. She knew something had to change but she didn’t want to disappoint. It was the classic dilemma of looking outside for answers.

As a mindfulness advocate and meditation teacher, I gathered her in a quiet space and asked her to write down everything that was in her mind. As she began writing, her hand gripped the pen harder and her words flew onto the page. When she was finished, I had her place her hands on the paper, close her eyes, and breathe.

When I felt she was no longer agitated, I began gently asking questions.

“Now that all of your mind chatter is on the page, can you feel yourself calming?”

She nodded.

“Remember, it’s all there on the paper. For now, I want you to connect to your inner world, the place where you are safe.”

She smiled.

“What does your heart enjoy experiencing?”

A frown came over her face and then she smiled. “Soccer.”

“Great! Hold onto that feeling. Imagine yourself playing soccer and scoring the winning goal. Does that make your heart dance?”

She laughed and opened her eyes, the light of love shining bright. “Thanks, Mom. I know what I need to do.” We hugged and she returned to her life with the certainty of her heart conversation.

The Takeaway

When you are not present with your children, it impacts the energy of the family. Mothers set the emotional tone and if you as a mother are agitated and stressed, you show up differently than if you are calm, centered, and present.

Elevate yourself and you will elevate the energy of your relationships.

Remember, you are so much more than your stress. Taking 10 minutes a day to discover that truth is transformative, inspiring, and uplifting.

To your prosperity,

Kathryn

Hello Empowered Wayers!

The world seems to be falling apart. Israel is stepping closer to a war with her neighbors; the Presidential election feels like a reality TV show; fear, anger, and divisiveness are the tone of the day.

Before you sink even further down the rabbit hole of disillusion and dis-enchantment, please pause and take a breath. When you breathe mindfully and intentionally, your mind calms and your body stops being in fight or flight mode.

When I became a mindfulness teacher, I learned to see my thoughts for what they were - bundles of energy that crossed my mind. The actual thought doesn’t matter as long as you allow it to cross your interior landscape. It’s when you attach to a particular thought and focus on it that it becomes real.

As you practice noticing your thoughts instead of attaching to them, something greater opens inside of you. Instead of defining yourself and your place in the world by what you think, you begin to feel a sense of something greater.

Focus on the feeling of knowing there is more to you than your mind conceives or believes. Discover the stillness inside that is the bridge to infinite Love. As you strenghten this connection, your mind settles and stops being “monkey mind.”

At that point, you are free.

A Way to Experience Yourself as More

I have meditated for many years and cannot remember the woman I was before I began my practice. She has faded from my awareness, because a greater energy now guides me. Instead of the small self I created by believing my mind and ego, I am expansive and full of Love.

You can reach this place too. All it takes is for you to drop the beliefs you have held dear, the memories you use to justify your current behavior, and stop porjecting into the future.

To help you reach that still place, I created a meditation called, “You are not Your Worries.'“ It’s on Insight Timer, a free app that you download to your phone. Please follow me on Insight Timer (after you create an account) and be the first to know of new meditations and courses.

Empowered Way is Reborn

Stay tuned to this newsletter. I am redesgning EmpoweredWay.com and will share new ebooks, courses, and Journals. My mission is to show you how to elevate your consciousness to higher leverls of abundance, awareness, and Sacred Feminine energy.

To your prosperity,

Kathryn

Hello Empowered Wayers!

Have you ever started wondering about something and couldn’t stop? That happened to me recently when I thought about the concept of time.

I was staring at the full moon and sharing a text conversation with my husband. I realized that there are different types of time because I was in Paris, France, and he was at home in Texas, a difference of 7 hours.

I was looking into his future by 7 hours! He was still in my past because it was 4:00 pm his time. We were on different timelines and communicating in real-time.

Think about that. The physical world has its own time.

The sun rises and sets at predictable times, the moon goes through its cycle every 28 days, and the seasons change in cadence with the earth’s rhythms.

But humans have developed a way to communicate anywhere in the world — instantly. Either by text or phone calls, we can reach anyone in the world with a cell phone or connection to Wi-Fi.

I call it Real Time.

Events are flashed immediately around the world. News of Queen Elizabeth’s death reached billions of people instantaneously. The invasion of Ukraine is another example of everyone learning of an event at the same time, no matter where they are in the world.

We have blasted through the illusion of time. But what are the consequences?

Separation instead of connection

We can see the events of other people and countries in Real Time.

It can become troubling when we cast our judgment on another person based on what we have read or seen about them on social media or the news.

It’s never the complete story. When you step back from the information and ask yourself, “Does that make sense?” it may create space between the consumption of the information and any judgment of the person.

When you blindly accept the news as “true,” you have given your power away. When you don’t question what you read or watch, you become susceptible to manipulation by those interested in separation and division.

Instead of forming judgments about what is going on in the world, why don’t we focus our attention on the connection to those around us?

Who are you without Real Time information?

What you consume impacts your life. Studies show that the incidence of suicides among teenagers is much higher since the advent of social media. The constant messaging of good v. bad, success v. failure becomes too much. Leading to negative choices.

What if you stepped away from the news and social media for a day, a week, or even a month? Would the world stop spinning without your consumption of daily disasters or silly celebrities?

As you free up time, shift to consuming topics that interest you.

Gather information and create something with it. When you feel that spark of excitement, pursue it — that is when you find meaning.

After your news and social media fast, notice how you feel. Are you calmer, more centered, and more present? Can you focus more on work and feel less anxious? Those are some of the many benefits of disconnecting from real-time news.

Real Time is the present moment, but it gets polluted by the intrusion of negative news, judgmental stories, and contrived events designed to make you feel alone and separated from yourself and others.

Besides Earth and Real Time, there is a third kind of time that few people know about.

Inner Time is where Your Meaning Exists

When you first wake up, don’t you notice that you are in a space of awareness, not of who you are, but who you are being?

When you explore Inner Time, that sense of becoming stronger, it radiates out to everyone you meet, and it connects you.

We are designed to live from the inside out, but we are taught to live from the outside in.

How do you experience Inner Time?

Begin a meditation practice. it only takes 10 minutes a day for changes to occur. You will notice that you no longer need the dopamine hit from social media or the news. You will turn away from the lure of group think and begin to see the world from a connected place because you have connected to yourself (and hopefully to a higher power).

Instead of divisiveness and separation, there is connection and unity.

Because you have changed, your world shifts to reflect your experience of Inner Time. Please join me on Insight Timer to explore Inner Time.

Bringing it home

Earth time, Real-Time, and Inner Time. We experience all three, but it is only when you appreciate the differences and impact of each that you can begin to recreate your life.

Earth Time is established. We can’t do anything to change it. Instead, we adapt ourselves to it (wearing coats in the winter and bathing suits in the summer).

Real-Time can be problematic because it allows you to see into another person’s world. Without awareness of the tendency to judge yourself and others, it can be harmful, divisive, and painful.

Inner Time is when you discover the meaning of your life. Only you can decide to explore Inner Time and connect with your Self.

The next time you see the full moon, ask yourself who isn’t seeing it because they are in a different time zone. You may uncover even more insights about time than I have shared.

To your prosperity,

Kathryn