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What do you want now?
It sounds like a simple question. But after years of organizing your life around your kids, your spouse, your parents, your work, and everyone else’s schedules, it can be surprisingly difficult to answer.
In this episode of Encore Living, I take that question apart one word at a time: What. You. Want. Now.
We’ll talk about getting specific about what you want, separating your own desires from what other people think you should want, and paying attention to the longings and discontents that may be pointing you toward something new.
And most importantly, we’ll talk about why you don’t need to figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life. You only need to start asking: What would I love now?
Interested in working with me this fall?
I’m putting together a small 12-week coaching group for empty-nester parents who are ready to start creating what they want next.
You’ll choose one part of your life you’d love to change, get clear about what you really want, and begin creating it.
Join the waitlist and you’ll be the first to know when enrollment opens.
JOIN THE PROGRAM WAITLIST
No commitment. Just first dibs.
And after you listen, give yourself ten minutes with a piece of paper and this question:
What would I love?
Don’t worry about whether it’s practical. Don’t figure out how you’ll make it happen. For now, just notice what comes up.
New episodes of Encore Living drop every Tuesday and Friday. Subscribe so you don’t miss the next one.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
For years, your life has been organized around your kids: the school calendar, activities, family schedules, even when you take vacations.
But now your kid is away at college. The circumstances have changed.
So why are you still following the same rules?
In this episode, I explore the “unwritten rules” we accumulate over the years, the choices and routines we follow so automatically that we may not even realize we're choosing them anymore.
Your empty nest has disrupted your life. And instead of rushing to get back to normal or immediately figuring out your next big chapter, what if you used that disruption as an opportunity to look at your life with fresh eyes?
I'll share a simple experiment you can try this week to uncover some of your own unwritten rules and begin deciding, consciously, which ones you still want to keep.
You don't have to reinvent your life.
Maybe you just need to question one rule.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
We celebrate our kids when they graduate, get into college, and head off into the world. But there’s another milestone that deserves some recognition too: you just finished raising an actual human being.
In this episode, I’m talking about why the beginning of the empty nest deserves to be celebrated, not just survived. I share one of my own proudest moments as a parent, why it’s important to “ritualize the transition,” and how looking back at your wins can help you mark the end of one chapter before rushing to figure out the next.
And I have a suggestion for something you can do this week to celebrate yourself.
After all, your kid isn’t the only one starting a new chapter.
Happy New Year, empty nester.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
How long does it take to feel okay after your kid leaves for college?
I wish I could tell you it's a few weeks. Or even a few months. For me, it took longer than that.
In this episode, I share the unusual way I measured my own progress over the years, and the recent moment that made me realize just how much had changed.
I also talk about why major life transitions can take longer than we expect, why getting back to "normal" isn't the same as being completely through it, and one positive step you can take right now to help yourself move forward.
If you're in those first painful days or months after your kid leaves, this episode is for you.
Because yes... it really does get better.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
Some college parents are reportedly spending thousands of dollars hiring professional designers to decorate their kids’ dorm rooms.
Um… okay.
But this episode isn’t really about dorm rooms.
It’s about what happens when you see someone else’s perfect move-in, the parent whose kid calls every day, or the empty nester who seems absolutely thrilled with their new life—and suddenly you start wondering:
Am I doing this wrong?
In this episode, I’m talking about the empty nest comparison trap, why I think we’re especially vulnerable to it during this stage of life, and how social media has made it almost impossible not to see how everyone else seems to be doing.
And I’ll share one simple trick that might just stop the comparison game cold.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
Your child has left for college. The calendar that once organized your life suddenly has wide-open spaces. And everyone seems to want to know the same thing:
So… what are you going to do now?
But what if you genuinely don't know?
In this episode of Encore Living, I explore what author Jim Collins calls “the fog”—the period of uncertainty that can follow a major life transition when the old path has ended, but the new one isn't visible yet.
For empty nesters, that fog can feel unsettling. But not being able to see what's next doesn't mean there's nothing next.
We'll talk about why you don't need to figure out the rest of your life right now, why this may not be the time to force a huge decision, and how small experiments—from trying a new hobby to reconnecting with people—can help you begin moving forward.
You don't need to see five miles down the road.
You just need to see the next 20 feet.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
Sometimes, starting again doesn’t begin with a plan, it begins with time.
In this episode, I share the story behind something I did last year that surprised me: I wrote a novel in 30 days.
And what writing that book taught me about starting again had very little to do with writing, and everything to do with identity, permission, and this season of life.
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👉 Curious about the in-progress novel I mention in the episode?
Send me a DM on Instagram and just write “I’m reading.” I’ll send you the current draft. IG: https://www.instagram.com/drthor.tv
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If you enjoyed this episode, I invite you to join my free weekly newsletter, Encore Living Insider.
That’s where I share reflections like this one, along with what I’m working on next — small ideas, gentle reframes, and prompts to help you navigate this season of life with a little more clarity and ease.
👉 Sign up for Encore Living Insider here: https://insider.drthor.tv
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If you’re in midlife — especially if you’re a parent with a kid now off at college — you might be realizing something strange.
You have time again.
Not "stolen" time. Not five-minute windows. But real, open space.
And that can feel surprisingly uncomfortable.
In this episode of Encore Living, I talk about why starting something new can feel harder after you’ve been really good at something for a long time — and how the story you once lived inside as a parent can quietly shape what you believe you’re allowed to do next.
Using my experience of writing a novel as the lens, I explore three ideas that apply to any midlife beginning:
• Why the stories we tell ourselves about who we are can quietly keep us stuck
• How changing the “container” makes starting feel possible again
• And why identity doesn’t come before action, it follows it
This episode isn’t about productivity or reinventing your entire life.
It’s about what happens when a big chapter ends… and you suddenly have time to spare.
If you’re an empty nester, a midlife parent, or someone standing at the edge of a new beginning, unsure where to start, or worried about betraying who you’ve been, this conversation is for you.
As I share in the episode, sometimes the best way to become who you want to be isn’t to decide everything in advance.
It’s to take one honest step… and let a few people see you while you’re becoming.
P.S. If someone came to mind while you were listening, feel free to share this episode with them. Sometimes the most reassuring thing we can offer is a reminder:
You’re not behind. And you don’t have to decide everything yet.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
After a big chapter ends, the hardest part isn’t knowing what’s next. It’s giving yourself permission to pause.
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If you enjoyed this episode, I invite you to join my free weekly newsletter, Encore Living Insider.
That’s where I share reflections like this one, along with what I’m working on next — small ideas, gentle reframes, and prompts to help you navigate this season of life with a little more clarity and ease.
👉 Sign up for Encore Living Insider here: https://insider.drthor.tv
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After a big chapter ends, there’s often a quiet moment no one prepares you for.
The kids are grown.
A career chapter closes.
A long season of responsibility winds down.
And instead of relief or clarity, a different question shows up:
What now?
In this episode of Encore Living, I explore that in-between space through an unexpected lens — imagining what Luke Skywalker might have done the day after saving the galaxy in Star Wars.
Not the next movie.
Not the next mission.
Just the day after the big win.
Because chances are, he didn’t immediately try to figure out the rest of his life.
And maybe… you don’t have to either.
In this episode, I talk about three simple, very human things Luke might have done on his day off — and what they can teach us about navigating midlife transitions without rushing ourselves:
If you’re a parent or empty nester who’s feeling unsettled, reflective, or quietly wondering what comes next, this episode is for you.
As I share in the episode, the pause between stories isn’t a problem to solve — it’s a space to inhabit.
Here’s a simple question to sit with after listening:
Which part of Luke’s day off do you need most right now?
Not what would impress anyone.
Not what would make sense on paper.
Just what would help you honor what you’ve already lived.
P.S. If someone came to mind while you were listening to this episode, feel free to share it with them. Sometimes the most reassuring thing we can offer is the reminder: You don’t have to decide everything yet.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
If you enjoyed this episode, I invite you to join my free weekly newsletter, Encore Living Insider.
That’s where I share reflections like this, along with what I’m working on next — small ideas, gentle reframes, and prompts to help you navigate this season of life with a little more clarity and ease.
👉 Sign up for Encore Living Insider here: https://insider.drthor.tv
When your kid goes back to school, it can stir up more than we expect.
They’re stepping into a new semester — new classes, new routines, new conversations — while you’re left asking a quieter question:
What about me?
In this episode of Encore Living, I explore a simple but powerful idea:
What if, instead of trying to figure out the rest of your life, you thought of this season as your own semester?
Not literally going back to college. No dorms. No degrees. No student loans.
But borrowing the way college actually works — experimenting, changing your mind, learning as you go — and applying it to midlife.
In this episode, I talk about three things college already taught us, and how they can bring relief right now:
• Why declaring a major doesn’t have to be permanent
• Why dropping a class isn’t failing — it’s information
• And why you’re allowed to have at least one thing you love in your life again
If you’re a parent or empty nester who’s feeling stuck, restless, or quietly wondering what’s next — this episode is for you.
As I mention in the episode, your kid isn’t trying to solve their entire future this semester.
They’re focused on the next few months. And maybe you’re allowed to do the same.
Here’s a simple question to sit with after listening:
If the next 15 weeks were your semester… what would you explore?
Not what would impress anyone. Not what would make sense on paper.
Just what feels worth showing up for.
P.S. If someone came to mind while you were listening to this episode, feel free to share it with them. Sometimes the most helpful thing we can say is, “You’re not late — you’re just in a new semester.”
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
If you enjoyed this episode, I invite you to join my free weekly newsletter, Encore Living Insider.
That’s where I share reflections like this, along with what I’m working on next — including a free upcoming bonus called “99 Ways to Celebrate You.”
👉 Sign up for Encore Living Insider here: https://insider.drthor.tv
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January has a way of rushing us forward before we’ve had a chance to look back.
In this episode of Encore Living, I talk about why—especially if you’re a parent or empty nester—this might actually be the perfect moment to pause and celebrate what you’ve already lived through.
Not in a forced, confetti kind of way. But in a grounded, honest, “that mattered” way.
If your house feels quieter than it used to…
If your kid just went back to school…
If you’re feeling a little behind heading into the new year…
This episode is for you.
As I mention in the episode, before you decide what comes next, make a list of the most memorable things you did last year.
Big things. Small things. Moments that took energy, courage, or heart.
To give you a sense of what I mean, here’s my list from 2025:
🗽 NYC for my birthday
🎭 Maybe Happy Ending on Broadway
🖼️ NYC museums
📚 Taught an 8-week Let Them Theory class
🌴 Cabo villa (with a chef!)
🇫🇷 Traveled through France for 12 days
🪖 Normandy
🙏 Finished a year-long spiritual program
✍️ Wrote my first novel in 30 days
🔥 Led Whatever It Takes (30 days)
🎓 Ordained as a minister
🚪 Retired after 8 years
🎉 Made it to 2026
When I put it all in one place, I didn’t feel behind anymore. I could actually see what I did. And celebrate it.
After you make your list, ask yourself:
What kind of person does this list describe?
Then finish this sentence:
“I’m the kind of person who…”
P.S. If someone came to mind while you were listening this, feel free to share the episode with them.
You can find me here:
Dr. Thor on Instagram @thorchallgren
Website: https://thorchallgren.com
From the publisher's feed
What if there’s more for you?
More possibility. More purpose. More of the life you’d really love to be living.
Welcome to Encore Living, a short weekday…
Each weekday, Thor shares a story, insight, question, or fresh perspective designed to help you think differently about what’s possible for your life.
Sometimes the biggest changes begin simply by noticing something you hadn’t noticed before, questioning an assumption, or becoming willing to try something new.
Thor is a TEDx speaker, author, New Thought minister, and transformational coach who helps people discover what they really want and move toward bringing it into reality.
No long lectures. Just a few minutes each weekday to think, reflect, and perhaps see your life from a different perspective.
Follow or subscribe to Encore Living and discover what might be possible for you.