Sun Quan formally declares war on Cao Cao, while his commander Zhou Yu secretly declares war on their supposed allies.

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Welcome to the Romance of the Three Kingdoms Podcast. This is episode 55.

Before we continue, I want to insert a note here that I haven’t been able to find a convenient place in the narrative to slip in. So far, I have been referring to the region occupied by Sun Quan as the Southlands. However, it’s about time that I introduce another name for this region — Dong (1) Wu (2). Dong (1) means East, and Wu (2) is the name of this general region. So the name literally means Eastern Wu. Going forward, you will hear me use both the Southlands and Dong Wu. In some cases, they are used interchangeably, but you should know that the Southlands refers to the geographical region, while Dong Wu refers to the political entity that occupies the region of the Southlands. It’s kind of like the difference between the South and the Confederacy during the American Civil War. So just try to keep those two terms and that distinction in mind as we go forward.

 

Alright, so last time, a few well-placed words from Zhuge Liang ticked off Zhou Yu something fierce and set him squarely against Cao Cao. So the next day Zhou Yu went before Sun Quan, broke down all the reasons why Cao Cao’s campaign is doomed, and asked Sun Quan to fight rather than surrender.

Upon hearing Zhou Yu’s words, Sun Quan sprang to his feet and declared, “That old traitor has long harbored thoughts of usurpation. The only people he feared were the Yuans, Lü Bu, Liu Biao, and me. Now all the others are dead. I swear I will not share this earth with that old scoundrel!”

He then said to Zhou Yu, “Your words match my thoughts exactly. Heaven must have sent you to me!”

“Your servant is willing to fight to the death for you, general,” Zhou Yu said. “But I just worry that you might still harbor hesitations.”

When he heard this, Sun Quan pulled out his sword and hacked off a corner of the desk in front of him.

“If anyone dares to mention surrender again, let this be your fate!” he declared. He then presented the sword to Zhou Yu, appointed him as the supreme field commander, with the general Cheng Pu as the vice commander, and Lu Su, Zhou Yu’s trusted friend and colleague, as the senior military adviser.

Zhou accepted the sword, turned to the gathered officials and officers and said, “At his lordship’s command, I am leading us to defeat Cao Cao. Tomorrow, everyone must gather at our headquarters on the river banks to receive their orders. Anyone who delays or interferes will be dealt with according to the laws of the seven prohibitions and 54 capital offenses.”

So these seven prohibitions are broad categories like slowing down the army, stealing from the army, lying to the army, and so forth. Each category contains a number of more specific offenses, totaling 54 in all, and each of them is punishable by death. Just to give you an idea of what would cost you your head, here are a few sample offenses: Failing to advance when you hear the war drums, failing to retreat when you hear the gong, not keeping your weapons in good condition, eavesdropping on military secrets, taking advantage of civilians, complaining too much, and complaining about the commander, and, probably my favorite, looking dour. So turn that frown upside down if you want to kee...