The Dating Lab

Episode 3: Love Isn’t at First Sight: 3 Marriages that Started With a So-So First Date


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In this peek behind the curtain, host Alyssa Dineen sits down with two of her own Style My Profile dating coaches, Max Nussenbaum and Katherine Paulsen. Max and Katherine get vulnerable, sharing the real, unvarnished stories of how they met their spouses on dating apps. They dismantle the myth of "love at first sight," revealing how their own "slow burn" relationships started with less-than-perfect first dates and grew into marriage. This conversation is packed with aha moments about recognizing a sustainable partner, trusting your gut, and why the "best first date ever" might actually be a red flag. Max and Katherine pivot from personal stories to professional advice, sharing the single most impactful tips they give clients for crafting authentic, effective dating profiles that attract the right person.

You'll also hear about:

  • (02:58) Max’s story of meeting his wife on Bumble and their journey to marriage.
  • (08:08) Why a "too amazing" first date can be a red flag for future relationship success.
  • (09:50) The crucial mindset shift: Separating what you're instantly attracted to from what makes a healthy, long-term partner.
  • (11:05) The power of the slow burn: Max reveals his wife actively didn't like him on their first date.
  • (20:22) Katherine’s experience of dating someone she was infatuated with versus the secure foundation she built with her husband.
  • (25:26) The "Muted Version of Self": Why it can take up to five dates for someone's true, wonderful personality to emerge.
  • (27:22) The ultimate question: How many dates should you go on before you call it quits?
  • (31:39) How to have low-pressure "check-in" conversations in early dating to build trust and communication.
  • (36:05) Pro Photo Tip: Use the majority of your photos to showcase personality, not just to prove you're attractive.
  • (37:48) Pro Bio Tip: It's not what you say, it's how you say it—and how to find your authentic voice.
  • (41:34) A game-changing hack: How looking at profiles of your own gender will instantly help you avoid clichés and write a better bio.

This episode is for anyone feeling fatigued by modern dating, wondering if they’re doing it wrong, or ready to shift their mindset to find a lasting partnership.

Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, or wherever you listen to podcasts!

Learn more about Max and Katherine:
  • Connect with Katherine on LinkedIn
  • Connect with Max on LinkedIn
  • Learn more about Katherine on her Website
  • Learn more about Max on his Website

Learn more about Alyssa Dineen:
  • Visit Style My Profile
  • Follow Alyssa on Instagram
  • Follow Alyssa on TikTok

...more
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The Dating LabBy Alyssa Dineen

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