Erasing Shame

What does it mean to carry shame in your skin? 

Indonesian American social worker Fiel Sahir joins DJ for an honest conversation about shame, identity, and faith. Fiel describes shame as "chains" and traces his story as a third-generation survivor of racial violence — a dark-skinned grandfather mocked in China, forced name changes after the 1965 purge, and being singled out as "Chinese," including through the 1998 Jakarta riots. He shares how a multicultural therapist, the witness of Hawaiian Christians, and the conviction that "God is there first" pulled him out of shame toward hope and human connection.

Show Notes at erasingshame.com/chains-culture-and-coming-home-fiel-sahir-on-indonesian-american-shame/

What does it look and feel like to live with the pain and confusion of a mental health diagnosis of bipolar disorder? Two Asian Americans open up about how they've experienced mercy and help while getting through the shame of mental illness in Asian and American cultures, churches, and condemning voices that come inside (so annoying!)

Listen to this book talk about Christ in the Abyss: Cultivating Deep Faith Amid Depression and Despair, a new book by Dr. Jean Neely. Jean personally shares how she made it through those difficult seasons in her life with lots of help from family, friends, flatmates, and faith. This is a wide and gentle conversation on suffering and spirituality that is a part of all of our human experiences.

See the show notes to get the book and more @ erasingshame.com/desperately-living-with-depression-and-experiencing-mercy-help/

• an Aim For Breakthrough x Erasing Shame collaboration! 

Dr. Audrey Davidheiser of Aim For Breakthrough and DJ Chuang of Erasing Shame have this conversation about Dr. Audrey's book, Grieving Wholeheartedly: Bringing Healing to Every Part of Your Soul, one chapter at a time on each episode.

Grief touches 100% of us. That's why we need this book and this conversation. This episode discusses Chapter 1, "Grieving: Unwanted, Yet Unavoidable."

We talk about the cultural pressures to "be okay" too soon, as well as the shame & stigma around psychotherapy in faith and people-of-color communities. Dr. Audrey notes the double standard that people welcome a dentist or surgeon to treat illnesses, but reject a mental health professional. 

Whether your loss is a death, a divorce, a home lost to fire, or organizational upheaval, this episode is an invitation to stop rushing your grief — and to let every part of your soul be heard.

Show Notes at https://erasingshame.com/why-are-you-over-it-yet-is-the-wrong-question/

Seattle-based therapist, author, and poet Sam Louie joins DJ Chuang to discuss his newly released workbook, Redefining Asian Shame: From Silence to Self-Acceptance — available now to download on Gumroad. (Listen for the 40% off discount code)

Sam shares how the workbook gives the readers to engage an interactive process to move from Asian shame to a healthy acceptance of oneself.

Sam explains his mind shift in how he clinically approaches shame, informed by the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model and the concept of "no bad parts." Rather than viewing shame as something to be excised or hated, Sam has come to see it as carrying an original protective purpose — one that, when understood, opens the door to real healing.

See the show notes and transcript at https://erasingshame.com/reclaiming-redefining-shame-for-asian-americans/

Toni Kim has a new book coming in August 2026—Shame Redeemed: Learning to Live in Christ's Freedom. She is a Taiwanese-American pastor who tireless worked on a seminary thesis about shame in Scripture and this book makes all that studied research accessible.

This conversation covers the critical distinction between unashamed and shameless, how social media cancel culture has turned shame into a universal experience, and why the church has yet to become what it should be: a place where people can walk in with their shame and be covered rather than condemned.

Toni and DJ also get personal — talking about shame that feels like blinding condemnation in the moment, why community is essential (not optional) for healing, and what to actually do when you're frozen and can't think your way out.

Show Notes at https://erasingshame.com/unashamed-but-not-shameless-the-difference-that-changes-everything/

Listen in on this conversation with Dr. Audrey Davidheiser and DJ Chuang and, you'll learn more about a better way to face challenging emotions as a part of me (e.g. "a part of me is sad") rather than identifying with it, like "I am sad." We also talk about the shame of dealing with grief, especially in cultures that "look down on emotions." And, get an overview of how the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model helps with healing hurts that happen in life.

Dr. Audrey Davidheiser is the author of 2 books— "Grieving Wholeheartedly: Bringing Healing to Every Part of Your Soul" https://amzn.to/4o6dAk4 & "Surviving Difficult People: When Your Faith and Feelings Clash" https://amzn.to/4ncpZ4Z

Connect with Dr. Audrey online on:

• Instagram • https://www.instagram.com/draudreyd/
• Substack • https://substack.com/@draudreyd
• Linktree • https://linktr.ee/DrAudreyD

Erasing Shame co-founder DJ Chuang chats with Aggie Park and profusely thanks her for being our Season 8 host. We review the highlights from the most popular episodes as we go down memory lane. And, we joyfully send her off to launch a new podcast called {UN}SPOKEN with Aggie Park!Check out & subscribe to {UN}SPOKEN• https://www.instagram.com/UN_spokenPod• https://www.tiktok.com/@un_spokenpod• watch the podcast back story intro: "Unleash Your Story: Transform Shame into Hope!" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbjQNZ_f-To

This was a live recording with Jenn Suen Chen, author of "Dim Sum and Faith: How Our Stories Form Our Souls." We talked about story, spirituality, and how our cultural narratives shape who we are and who we’re becoming.

The author's deepest prayer is that the book would serve as a resource for deeper discussion around growing in our relationship in Christ and with one another. Her ultimate desire is that Asian American and Christians globally would experience the love of God in deeper ways through the book.Check out this new book!• Read a free chapter at the publisher's book page https://www.ivpress.com/dim-sum-and-faith• Buy on amazon at https://amzn.to/4lv8PPd - available in print, kindle, and audiobook• Buy at B&N https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/dim-sum-and-faith-jenn-suen-chen/1146378006

• Win a free print copy of this book https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/220113507-dim-sum-and-faith (enter by August 19, 2025)

Connect with Jenn Suen Chen:• website https://www.jennsuenchen.com• instagram https://www.instagram.com/jennsuenchen

Jenn Suen Chen was previously on 5 episodes of Erasing Shame @https://erasingshame.com/tag/jenn-suen-chen/

What do you do when you’re adopted into a loving Christian family… but you still feel like a reject?
When you smile in church but go home to a voice in your head saying, “You’re not enough. You were never enough.”

When you’ve been told Jesus loves you, but deep down you believe He couldn’t possibly want someone like you?

That was Andrew Yook’s life.
Loved, but lonely. Surrounded, but unseen. Adopted, but still feeling abandoned.
The emptiness drove him to choices that almost killed him—addiction, shame, self-destruction.
And yet… Jesus came for him right there. In the middle of the mess. In the relapse. In the hopelessness.

This is not a polished, sanitized Christian story.
This is rejection, rage, relapse, rock bottom.
It’s meeting Jesus when you have nothing left to give.

It’s watching Him dig you out of the ashes—not just to save you, but to use your scars to heal someone else.

In this episode, we rip the mask off and talk about:

• What “unwanted” feels like, even in a good home

• Why being told Jesus loves you isn’t enough—you have to meet Him

• Carrying shame you didn’t deserve, and the shame you created

• The lie of “i'm too far gone” and how to kill it

• Why ignoring your mental health will wreck your soul and body too

• How to turn your most shameful chapters into weapons of hope

• The daily fight to shut down the voice that says you’re worthless

If you’ve ever felt like you can’t outrun your past, that you’ll never measure up, or that your pain has disqualified you—listen to this.
Because Andrew’s story is proof:
You’re not too far gone.
You’re not too broken.
You are not alone.

And if all you can manage right now is a whisper, let it be this:
“Jesus, i need You.”
Because the moment you speak it, He’s already on His way.

join our livestream as we celebrate the book launch of “Dim Sum and Faith: How our Stories Form Our Souls”, with author Jenn Suen Chen —on our YouTube channel and on erasingshame.com - the YouTube chat room will be open for your questions or add one here on Spotify beforehand!