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Espresso
By Benedict PolizziComedy
Espresso episodes
- things that should be illegalmmhahHAha this week ben asks the fam if they were president what's something irrelevant they would make illegal ( ˡⁱᵏᵉ ˢᵃʸⁱⁿᵍ "ᶜʰᵉᵉʳˢ" ʷⁱᵗʰ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵒⁿᵉ ᵉˡˢᵉ ᵇᵉᶠᵒʳᵉ ᵗᵒᵘᶜʰⁱⁿᵍ FOOD) ehem he talks about his phobia of random noises, zac efron's bee sting face AND changing his dad's ringtone to britney spears and it going off in the middle of a meeting. Bennie realizes he still can't read in public and agrees that if you aren't looking at everyone's ass in church you're going to hell. Later in the pod he imagines cartoons being taller in real life than you think they are and immediately gets scared af obviously, then he goes #ViViViViral and does #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi43 min
- worst thing you've ever doneholy shit this week ben asked the fam the worst thing they've ever done and not told anyone (ˡⁱᵏᵉ ˢʰⁱᵗᵗⁱⁿᵍ ⁱⁿ ᵃ ᵇᵃˢᵏᵉᵗ... ᵃᵗ ᵃ ᵇᵃˢᵏᵉᵗ ʷᵉᵃᵛⁱⁿᵍ ˢʰᵒᵖ) ... Bennie talks about how monkeys 100% have a night club at the zoo, he remembers stealing everything you can in college, and the science behind acting hurt when you do something dumb. Ben remembers horrifying thoughts of writing the same thank you letters every single year, he breaks down the words his dad can't say, analyzes the most horrifying place on earth (POST OFFICE) and how influential starburst jellybeans are to the candy community then he goes #ViViViViral and does #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi39 min
- today years oldsup? on this shot ben asked the fam their today year's old moment ⁽ˡⁱᵏᵉ ʳᵉᵃˡⁱᶻⁱⁿᵍ ᵍᵘᵐ ᵈᵒᵉˢⁿ'ᵗ ˢᵗᵃʸ ⁱⁿ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᶠᵘᶜᵏⁱⁿᵍ ˢᵗᵒᵐᵃᶜʰ ᶠᵒʳ ⁵ ʸᵉᵃʳˢ⁾ whoops... He talks about how annoying guys with stick shifts are, he wishes he was in Chet Hanks' WHITE BOY SUMMER vid, reminisces about playing human foosball, explains his small talk addiction and talks about Mark McGwire for 39 minutes. Ben chooses DJ Drama to narrate his AutoBiography and is 100% sure that a banana is the Paris Hilton of fruit, he goes #ViViViViral and does #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi41 min
- things guys NEED to stopFAM! this week Ben has comedian Alex Price (@illumanti_hr_rep) on the pod to break down things guys shouldn't do anymore (like backing into parking spots ... ⁱ ᵈᵒ ⁱᵗ ᵉᵛᵉʳʸ ᵗⁱᵐᵉ) they talk about the way Alex's therapist doesn't give a shit about about weed and why the mall is the most comforting place IN THE WORLD. They remember their most embarrassing moments, winning science fair and why McDonalds sprite is gods milk. Alex tells a story about the craziest shit that's ever happened at KILROY'S, they both do a full ASMR clinic, go #ViViViViral and do #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi52 min
- million dollar ideassup? this week bennie breaks down the fam's million dollar ideas (like having subtitles in real life ... which would be good cuz ben can't hear until after 4pm eastern standard time) He talks about when his mom used to beat his ass in the middle of haircuts and having his first anxiety attack when changing the channel in front of people. Ben makes his own WHITE BOI SUMMER rules and regs, creates Lil Nas X satan shoes for kids and has a 4th gwade speech moment, he goes #ViViViViral and #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi41 min
- dumb stuff you spent $$ onwhat up espresshoes? this week ben has his son @YoungMantis2 on the pod to sort through the dumbest things the fam has ever spent money on (...like carpet skates to slide around your house) lol, ben and austin talk their most awkward moments with girls, they rank the best slang words and find out Mantis has never eaten CHERRY. The boys decide which fast food restaurant has the best dessert and find out Popeye and Mantis have the same exact posture then they go #ViViViViral and do #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi56 min
- cringiest thingsFAM! on this shot Ben breaks down the cringiest things you did when you were younger (like put rocks in your mouth so your brother thinks you're cool....lol) he decides that if you and anyone else has seen the Princess Bride you immediately kiss, he creates a new olympic sport, talks about the time he almost got henna tattoos and tells a story about the held back kid who was the best kickball player IN THE WORLD. Ben also teaches a How To Talk Hot 101 course, realizes guys proposing is so gd funny and he offers advice on how to reply when someone says sorry oh yeah he goes #ViViViViral and does #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi1 hr 2 min
- guilty pleasureswhat up espresshoes ;') it's not a religious podcast but it is this week cuz @benderjoey is back whoops Ben and Joey make fun of catholic school. They go through the Fam's guilty pleasure DM's (like eating..... toast..... lol) then they explain why they have the hardest confirmation names of all time AND the craziest shit their parents did to them when they got in trouble as kids. Ben gives Joey a periodic table and states and capital quiz, they breakdown how good held back kids were at kickball and decide to adopt a highway (jk this whole podcast about Mark McGwire) They go #ViViViViral and do #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎UPCOMING SHOWS: March 12/13 Wiley's Comedy Club (Dayton, OH)𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi41 min
- near-death experiencesThis week the Fam sent in their near-death experiences (like getting crushed by a horse while playing redneck polo ......) lol Ben breaks down his viral self defense TikTok and realizes he's been making out with mannequins his entire life. He discovers that it's impossible to actually go skiing unless you snapped both of your collarbones and tore your meniscus, he teaches you the one word you need to know to win an argument, remembers screaming at kids who cut through his yard when he was 12 and understands that he'll never get more excited in his life than when there's a DJ drop right before the climax of a song WHERED YOU FIND THIS? He goes #ViViViViral and does #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎UPCOMING SHOWS: March 12/13 Wiley's Comedy Club (Dayton, OH)𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi47 min
- things you should like but you hateWhat up Fam??? On this Shot Ben has comedian @SaraPopTarts on the pod and @lol_derek_james bullies his way on the show again ...... ;) They break down the Fam's DM's of things they're supposed to like but find annoying like (like bringing bagels on roadtrips.....) they rank the most basic dog breeds, discuss how to say CRAYON and the difference between a Crayola and RoseArt kid. They invent a dessert hot pocket, discuss sarah's condiment fetish and decide WHO IS MORE ANNOYING: Subway, Penn Station, Jimmy Johns or Jersey Mikes, then they go #ViViViViral and do #DaysOfTheWeek but you already knew that 😎𝘿𝙈 𝙤𝙧 𝙏𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝘼𝙉𝙔 𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝘽𝙚𝙣 𝙩𝙤 𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙧 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙤𝙙 ! (@benedictpolizzi)→→→ 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗧𝗼 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲 & 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄!𝗦𝗲𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗼 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝗲𝗻!: https://v.cameo.com/E48BXekQ29𝗧𝗶𝗸𝗧𝗼𝗸: https://www.tiktok.com/@benedictpolizzi?source=h5_m𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗧𝘂𝗯𝗲: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXRwNZpU67AK24r5QGfIfCw𝗜𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗮𝗺: https://www.instagram.com/benedictpolizzi/𝗧𝘄𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿: https://twitter.com/benedictpolizzi56 min
About Espresso
From the publisher's feed
Stand Up Comedian Benedict Polizzi gives listeners horrendous advice