F1 ChatPod

On this week's episode of the F1 Chatpod, we talk about Max Verstappen's illegal move on George Russell. One can draw a direct line from drivers like Ayrton Senna and Michael Schumacher (and perhaps a younger Fernando Alonso) to Max . Win at all costs, never apologize, never admit wrongdoing, and complain loudly and consistently. 

You see it in politics these days too, specifically strong men like Doug Ford in the orange emperor. You see it in European football. You don't see it in American football or Canadian hockey. You don't see it in UCI cycling. But in some sports, there are some real big babies.

We have fetished victimhood and weaponized blame. As usual the pendulum has swung from the stiff upper lip all the way to the perpetually triggered.  And some of our heroes are the worst offenders. 

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This is our most unprofessional episode, especially at the beginning. Not because we have diverging opinions on the Monaco Grand Prix but mostly because Milkbags is so aggressive.

Join two comedians and old friends trying to remain friends while talking about Formula One. Milkbags in Vancouver is still practising comedy whereas JB and Toronto has given up and come back to school and is now pursuing a masters in psychology. Milkbags is a longtime fan of Formula One. JB is a Johnny-come-lately. Join these two men of a certain age as they navigate friendship, Formula One and feelings.

PS - The thumbnail is the Prince of Monaco's love child and first born with his mum who the Prince met on an airplane. 

Is this the end of the Autodromo Internazionale Enzo e Dino Ferrar?

Is this the beginning for Colapinto or just another false start? 

Does Max change diapers? 

The F1 Chatpod is a Formula One podcast for people who want more than just statistics with their race cars. Here at F1 Chatpod headquarters we strive to give you the juicy goss, the unresearched facts and the baseless speculation. 

Our bona fides are true, however. Milkbags and Vancouver brings decades of Formula One fandom experience and JB and Toronto is pursuing a masters in psychology. Between the two of them, they bring unique insight into the thoughts behind the  decisions made in the world's fastest sport.

Really, this is a podcast about two friends  meeting once a week to catch up. And to talk about F1.

And there's always something to talk about in F1 these days. Because  much of it is barreling towards disaster.  

This summer I met my friend Riel at 3rd Beach, Vancouver's second greatest beach, to chat and go for a swim. We talked at length about the usual things: death, bodies, flag persons, noise pollution and the best way to get into the Pacific.  

My old friend Michael Teigen and I hike up Nelson Canyon to Whyte Lake on Hollyburn Mountain. We talk about death, pedophiles, and acting. The holy trinity. Hope you like it. 

But first I complain about MUSIC AS POLLUTION. 

I don't like classic rock. I don't like that  Steely Dan song that we've all been forced to listen to.. Or the same Lynard Skynard songs you hear over and over on the radio. Like music hasn’t been made since 1970-whatever. It's the same with the Pop standards as well. I'm sick of them. 


If I go into the Guardian drug store near my house I will invariably be humming Ed Sheeran for the rest of the day. And that music is awful.But I know it's me that is the problem, not Ed. 

Earworm Sensitivity Disorder. It’s a real thing. Or as real as Restless Leg Syndrome or fybromyalgae. When I hear a song, good or bad, I cannot not digest it properly. 

I agree restaurants require music in the background. But when it is deafening I try to get them to turn it down. It rarely works. I offer to pay them to turn it down. They look at me like I don’t like fun, or puppies or sunshine.  So what am I to do? I have two options…

One: Exposure Therapy. I am going to listen to oldies music and other Jurassic dreck on my spotify account a little bit a day. I will do it under the guise of exposing my young children to all types of music even if it is the same three Bob Marley songs we’ve all heard one million times. Even if it is “Creep” by Radiohead as if they’ve never written another song. Even if it’s Steely fucking Dan and his simpering over-production. 

Two: Stop Having Friends and Die Alone. This is an option. I have seen it. Not pretty. When I’m alone I argue with less people. When I’m alone I alienate fewer. When I’m alone I harm no one. But I don’t stop talking angrily. I just do it to myself. Which is worse? Being with people that aren’t exactly like you and keeping your mouth shut once in a while or dying alone muttering to yourself? 

I require friendship more than anything else apart from reading and writing. This is truer now as I am old and no longer in need of sex and intimacy like when I was younger. So my choice is clear. Now that I’m pushing 50 I am going to stop acting like a baby/old person. 

Exhibit A: I find my quieter friends saying more now that I listen more. Ding! Surprising I know. 

B. I have a song that I keep at the ready in case of aural abuse. It’s called Chinatown and it’s by DO Make Say Think and it will pleasantly reset your brain to neutral. 

C. By walking towards the shitty music somehow I don’t hear it as much anymore. It doesn’t make much sense but it’s a Buddhist thing. Look it up. 

D. The other night I went into the same said Guardian Drugs to get some nose spray. Because I can’t live with out it. That and lip balm. And melatonin. And anti-reflux meds. And boner pills. I’m getting off topic. Inside the Guardian there was the hardest rap playing over those tiny ceiling-mounted speakers.  I mean this man was very angry at the in his life. Apparently they had done a real number on him. 

I got my nose spray and then went up to the cashier.  “That’s some pretty intense rap happening right now.” And the future rocket scientist said “I really like this playlist but yeah that one is heavy. You just gotta let it play man.” 

Okay, sure fella. Just got to get through it eh? No chance of editing these playlists. Once they're made they are set in stone.  

"Have a good night Sir." 

As untenable as that rap song was it was still preferable to Ed Sheeran it did not stick in my head. I now do all of my pharmaceutical shopping in the evening when that particular future rocket scientist is playing DJ. 

Jeff Gladstone and Shekhar Paleja walk around Commercial Drive in East Vancouver. They talk about Hindu nationalism, the demise of Vancouver TheatreSports, and identity politics. Then they run into my old friend Pippa Kouwenhoven. 

This episode of Walkie Talkie is brought to you by Uber. There’s a good reason your next Uber ride is half the price of a taxi cab. That’s because your driver isn’t being remunerated fairly. No benefits, no job security plus your driver has to pay for the car, the gas, and the upkeep. Uber! German for a shitty job that people take because they’ve run out of choices. 

Today on Walkie Talkie comedians Dylan Rhymer and Simon King walk under Iron Worker's Memorial Bridge on the border of East Vancouver and Burnaby. Ooh, borderlands! What's gonna happen? Well, technical difficulties happen but our intrepid walkers reconvene at Trout Lake near Broadway and Commercial and run into -- wait for it -- John C. Reilly! What a walk! What a talk!  

Don't forget that I love youuuuuuuu!

JB

Today on Walkie Talkie I once more do not walk anywhere. Instead Riel from Vancouver levies not one but four complaints about lawn care implements before I read you a personal essay on the time I was making adult diaper commercials in Romania and we went to Dracula's Castle. 

Love youuuuuuuu!

JB

On this episode I leave you my eulogy. I'm not planning on dying anytime soon but you never know. Besides, I can't trust anyone else to write something as well as I can. They don't know my life. But they will know my death. 

I am preparing for death. It happens all the time. Why can't I get my head around it? Consider this me practicing. 

Love youuuuuuuu,

JB

This episode I'm doing something different. Two complaints and then a longish-form read. It's a personal essay I wrote about the time I was in the park with some kids having recently macrodosed on mushrooms. 

Paul from Calgary calls in and talks about how the world is built for average people except no one is really average. And Joel from Meaford ON calls in to complain about February. Thanks for listening. Love youuuuuu!