Family Addiction Coaching

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 Are you a parent worried about whether or not you’ll see your daughter alive again due to her addiction? 

This episode will show you two very different versions of what it's like when you ask a professional for help for your loved one with addiction. First, you will learn what the addiction treatment industry will say you must do. Without knowing a thing about your daughter. You’ll experience the impact of the judgment and blame the industry greets you with when asking for help.

It doesn’t have to be that way. You'll then see another more practical approach, the CRAFT (Community Reinforcement and Family Training) approach. CRAFT embraces the fact that there's no one-size-fits-all approach to recovery. 

You’ll learn how it feels to be welcomed with the CRAFT Approach, which relies upon: 
• Understanding and Kindness: Responding with empathy to the underlying addiction issues. 
• Unconditional Love: Providing consistent support to help your daughter feel loved. 
• Active Involvement: Engaging actively in the recovery process, learning effective communication, motivation, and boundary-setting techniques. 

You MUST keep looking until you find support that gives you hope, optimism, and progress.

Together, we can make a difference in the lives of those we love.  You can do this! 

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Are you feeling paralyzed, frustrated, and hopeless due to a loved one's addiction? Patrick Doyle and Laurie MacDougall discuss the REST (Resources, Education, Support, Together) groups, a free program where families experience transformative recovery. Families use REST to find new strategies and skills to communicate with their loved ones. They also address the misconception of enabling and the importance of timing and setting boundaries. Through the power of community, families let go of guilt and shame and gain healthy self-compassion.

Key Takeaways:

Families often feel overwhelmed, frustrated, and hopeless, but REST offers new skills and strategies to create positive change.

Through REST families improve communication skills to create a safe and understanding environment.

Setting boundaries and timing are crucial when addressing addiction-related issues with a loved one.

Families start their transformative recovery with the support of the REST community.

Notable Quotes:

"Words cut deep. Just changing how you communicate can make a positive change." - Laurie MacDougall

"Timing is everything. Knowing when to address something is a skill families can learn." - Patrick Doyle

"Enabling is an antiquated approach. Understanding and compassion can lead to positive change." - Laurie MacDougall

"Confidence comes from learning new skills and strategies and realizing you have control over your own actions." - Patrick Doyle

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Have you financially supported a child with addiction for years and then reached a point where you wanted to change but could not?  Have you wondered if your support is holding your child back rather than helping them move forward?  Have you wondered if professional coaching might be more useful for changing your behavior, than psychotherapy?  This strong resourceful loving mom had tried everything but found herself unable to take care of herself while supporting her daughter with addiction.  Through coaching, she changed her behavior to better self-care, which allowed her daughter to find recovery, maturity, and independence.  No tough love, no detachment with love, no codependency; by using support, skill-building, and practice, this mom found a way to save her daughter her grandson and herself from addiction.

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 While families are often in a position to encourage a loved one to get treatment, they are generally sidelined with inadequate inaccurate information, support and resources.  Though many persons with addiction do not have healthy families to lean upon, the minimal support available is largely devoted to parents of young people with addiction. Close friends, partners, and chosen families can also serve as valuable recovery capital that can give people motivation to sustain the ongoing effort required to get better; or to simply stay safe. Meet Alex Colyer and her Albertus Project, who learned the hard way about the many paths to recovery. Alex has used the deep grief from the loss of her bff to fuel her mission; to help families and persons access treatment and get resources needed to reduce the risk of harm. 

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Guest Interviewer extraordinaire Amanda guides the conversation as son and father describe the pursuit of addiction recovery as a family.  We hear many stories from persons recovering, and a few stories of families recovering from the impact of addiction. For the first time the two join together to describe their mutual struggles; showing the power of compassion, kindness, and mutual support. Michael's recovery journey has been anything but orthodox; which fits his personality, and gives hope and meaning to the concept of multiple pathways. Many persons with addiction don't benefit from traditional industry dogma, and need to find their own individualized way. Patients don't fail treatment; treatment fails patients. 

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Today’s guest is the remarkable Ms. Casie Fariello, the Co-Founder and CEO of an exciting online parent support organization called Other Parents Like Me; or OPLM.   We’ll be talking about the impact of parenting a child with addiction; and how Casie found her path to recovery from that impact. She credits Community Reinforcement and Family Training (CRAFT) for her decision to welcome her son home, to recover as a family.  This compelling story about peer family support provides hope that family addiction recovery is possible.  You can find Casie and her virtual community of ‘parents who get it’ at OPLM.com.  

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The third of my Pro Tips series gives you sixteen little-known practical steps you can take TODAY to Find Help For Addiction.  Did you know that many states have a 24hr hotline at 211 that will give you soon intake appointments for treatment? That having a medical professional calling an ER in advance will get you better care? That patients usually do best when they are allowed to decide on treatment they wish to pursue; or not? That you can get a same-day appointment with your primary care physician to start treatment? That your health insurance will provide Telehealth medical evaluations to start treatment? That the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA)'s Navigator search engine finds treatment with no commercial sponsors?  That sometimes residential rehabs don't help; or even cause harm?  That going in to a Safe Stations firehouse in some cities will get you a Recovery Coach with resources? Try to remain hopeful, recovery is always possible; don't give up on yourself!

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 People can accomplish amazing things when they feel loved. I address a listener question, "Episode 15 had great tips on recognizing addiction, but once you recognize it, how do you talk to a loved one about your concerns?" CRAFT: Community Reinforcement and Family Training, has a 70% success rate for encouraging a loved one with addiction into treatment. What’s unique about my family coaching is that the family learns more effective approaches towards addiction.  With a little help, family can influence their loved one to move forward in a positive direction. Here are 7 tips to better communication, along with an easy acronym (PIUS) to help you remember. If you're concerned about a loved one who uses substances, and if the advice you're getting just isn't working, feel free to contact me.  I'll help you learn a more compassionate approach proven to be most effective, and together we can start to save your family from addiction. 

Sign up for the newsletter today at https://familyaddictioncoach.com/.

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Sign up for the newsletter today at https://familyaddictioncoach.com/.

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If your loved one has a substance use disorder and is not interested in reducing use, maintaining abstinence, or in pursuing treatment, this episode will help. Today’s guest has used my coaching support for several years to help her family help her son manage his addiction.  Though he had no interest in abstinence or in treatment, she was unwilling to withdraw her love and support, and refused to let him hit a rock hard bottom.  Harm Reduction encourages us to take all steps possible to promote a person's health safety and welfare.  It's about families getting useful support and guidance on how they can help their loved one who doesn’t want help.  

After four years of hard work and family coaching support, for the first time ever, her son recently asked for her help.  It saved his life, and he’s now employed and in a sober living program.  If you are concerned about a loved one’s substance use, call 211, go to Al-Anon or SmartRecovery Friends and Family, message me at www.familyaddictioncoach.com.    

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