Happy Friday, you sappy sack of sycophants! Onion Army rise up! Can you imagine? Chad Zumock has rejected Patrick’s offer to attend Hackamania, prompting Patrick to prematurely pull the offer. What does this mean for Hackamania? Does the event need Chad to be a success? Only time will tell. Aaron Imholte continues his toxic warpath against his own fans, dwindling his audience down to just a few dozen loyal NPCs. Who is Nick Rekieta, and is there more going on with their relationship with the Imholtes? What’s got April crying? What’s got Mooby lashing out? And what’s got this Nick guy looking outside of his own marriage to make his ding dong go six to midnight? Let’s explore!