Do you think dating is a waste of time? I sure used to. It all seemed so futile. 

Year after year would slip by and all I’d have to show for it was another heartbreak or 2 if I’d managed to meet anyone I was interested in at all.

You cannot afford to spend your time this way. It’s time to make some changes.

Time is not your friend as a single woman. I know this is harsh, but I'm not here to blow smoke at you and tell you fairytales.If you want a great guy, it’s only going to get harder, so stop wasting your time asap. Here are the top ways I see women wasting their time in dating.

Not giving good guys a chance. You think you’re saving time by cutting them off early, but you’re shooting yourself in the foot.

Staying with the wrong guys too long. A man who is not in love with you or doesn’t share your relationship goals is a waste of time. Get rid of him.

Hiding and calling it healing. You need to be out meeting and dating men. When you take time off and don’t do anything with it or learn from what you’ve been through, you’re likely to repeat the same patterns the next time you date. Time alone doesn’t help anything. It’s like pausing in the middle of remodeling your house. When you come back, nothing has improved.

Waiting for the “right time”. There is no perfect time to do this. The right time is when you decide you want someone to share your life with. It gets harder the longer you wait.

Holding out for your prince. I see so many women holding out for a fantasy of a man who does not exist. What exactly are you hoping for? Do you know anyone like this in real life? If so, why aren’t you dating him? I want you to answer these questions.

If you’re doing any of these things, you’re not alone. But if you want to find a great guy, you’ll need to make some changes.

I can help you do this in 2025. 

Click here to learn more about my coaching program.

I’m willing to bet anything that you’re scrolling past good guys all the time on the apps.

You’re overlooking these men in favor of who you think you should be dating, but those guys never work out.

No you don’t have to have a certain type. Have you noticed that those guys never work out? Why would you tell yourself that story? Stop it now if you want a man in your life anytime soon.

Most women on these apps are trying to date the same 10% of guys and overlooking the rest.

There are good men on dating apps and they are looking for you. But you’re:

Scrolling past them in favor of the flashy guys

Dumping them because they aren’t your type

Not giving them a chance because you don’t feel chemistry right away

Blowing them off because they come off as needy, desperate or get too excited about you

It isn’t working. These guys you think you should be dating aren’t giving you the time of day. They’re non-commital at best and flat out ignoring you at worst.

And you’re wasting years telling yourself there are no good men on these apps, but they are right in front of you.

They have bad pictures, dad bods and aren’t smooth professional daters, but they are good men.

You need to look at this differently in order to find them and have a relationship with one.

I’m hosting a free class to help you do this in 2025. 

It's called “The Ultimate Dating Plan” and it’s taking place on January 6 at 7PM Central.

You need to be there if you want to find a great guy.

You can sign up here or go to https://reneesuzannecoaching.com/datingplan

You need to get real about what dating looks like after 40 so that you can have a fighting chance at getting into a real relationship with a good guy.

This isn’t an easy thing to do after 40, but we tend to make it even harder by not facing the reality of what dating and relationships look like at this life stage.

When you expect it to look like it did in your 20’s (even though nothing else does!) you are in for a rough ride.

If you want to find a good man out there, you’ll benefit massively from aligning your priorities with what you really want.

So instead of prioritizing a man’s height, looks, swagger, excitement level, think about the kind of relationship you really want, how you want to feel with this man.

Then, consider the qualities a man would need to possess to be able to participate in this kind of relationship and prioritize those qualities instead.

A good shortcut for this is to think about your best friends. What qualities do they possess? What do you like about them?

You’re much more likely to have a good relationship with a man who has these qualities instead of the more flashy, exciting ones.

Excitement is one of the most overrated qualities when it comes to dating.

I want you to date boring and make the rest of your life exciting.

Date predictable men whose words and actions match, men you can count on. 

Date the nice guy with the dad bod who worships you instead of the gym rat who’s trying to seduce all the women in his yoga class.

Date the man with a kid and a regular job instead of the exciting executive who never has time for you.

I’m hosting a free class to help you do this in 2025. 

It's called “The Ultimate Dating Plan” and it’s taking place on January 6 at 7PM Central.

You need to be there if you want to find a great guy.

You can ⁠sign up here⁠ or go to ⁠https://reneesuzannecoaching.com/datingplan

In order to find a good guy out there, you have to do something to make it happen. I want you to give up on the myth that it’s going to just happen one of these days and get to work. Stop believing things like:Love happens when you least expect it

It happens when it is meant to be

It will happen if it’s meant to happen

You’ll just go about your business and see what happens.

That might work when you’re younger and surrounded by single age appropriate men but it’s terrible advice when you’re in your 40s and up, so cut it out.

You need to be meeting new men regularly and the best way to do that is to get on a dating app. So just freaking do it.

And do it with a great profile and work on your dating skills.If you’re hoping to just luck into this, you are literally shooting yourself in the foot and I don’t want this for you.You have to actually try to meet people.

I want you to take this as seriously as you would a job search, financial or fitness goal. Make a plan to get what you want in this world and then put it into action.

I’m hosting a free class to help you do this in 2025. 

It's called “The Ultimate Dating Plan” and it’s taking place on January 6 at 7PM Central.

You need to be there if you want to find a great guy.

You can sign up here or go to https://reneesuzannecoaching.com/datingplan

Your future husband is on a dating app right now looking for you.

He gets as frustrated scrolling through all the ridiculousness, just like you do.

I want you to help him find you.

The best way to do this is to have a top notch dating profile.

And yes, the pictures matter. You need those too.

But your profile must stand out.

The men you want to meet actually read them and decide how to treat you based on their first impression of you.

This is unconscious of course, good men will treat everyone respectfully, but if you want him to be really excited about you, you’ll need a good profile.

Most people have no idea how to do this.

They just wing it and write the same things everyone else does which is BORING.

Think about it though, you’re a successful woman who’s gotten far in life.

Would you search for your dream job with a resume that you threw together on the couch one night with a glass of wine in one hand? No!

The stakes are even higher here. You’re looking for someone to share the rest of your life with here, please take it seriously and write a decent profile.

A good profile can introduce you to better men and get them excited about you from the moment he clicks on your profile.

It can result in better initial messages, better dates and do some of the screening for you so you don’t end up with as much randomness out there.

I have an amazing resource that can help you do it in just a couple of hours.

It’s called “Perfect Profile Toolkit” and it’s available now at a fraction of the cost of working with me as your coach.If you’ve been wanting to work with me but not sure about taking the plunge, it’s a great introduction to my work.

Click here to get instant access or go to bit.ly/gr8profile

I once met a guy speed dating and I thought he was very handsome.It later became apparent that he thought I was someone else when he scheduled our follow up date.

I thought he was very handsome until I didn’t.

This was an excellent, but very painful lesson for me and it made me think about a lot of things.

What makes someone attractive?

How tall/handsome/successful he is?

Where he lives? Where he travels? What he reads?

I saw him later at a street fest and turned away from him because it just felt awful to see him.

I literally found him repulsive because I associated him with a negative painful experience.

By contrast, my husband recently drove an hour + to the city to pick me up at 11:00 at night because I got food poisoning when I was out with my friends.

He brought bags and a towel and held my hand while I tried not to be sick in the car. He took care of me the next day when I could barely move.

Is that handsome hunk you think you should be dating going to do that for you or will he be at the gym or talking to some other woman? Is that really what you want to experience?

I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP.

Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

If you’re anything like me when I was single, you just want to skip to the good part and be in an amazing relationship.

Looking for a guy is hard. Early dating feels clunky and awkward.

You think that if you could just meet the right person and get into a relationship, everything would be fine.

I found out from experience that this is not true at all.

I think that dating being what it is is the Universe’s way of getting you ready for that relationship you want so much.

Relationships don’t just happen, they are built.

Healthy relationships take skills to build and maintain and if you don’t possess these skills you likely won’t be able to get into a relationship in the first place, and if you do it either won’t be healthy or it won’t last. Or both.

I know that is not what society tells us. We’ve been weaned on this narrative that we will meet the right person and then everything will fall into place, but if you’re over 40 and this has not happened yet, it is very likely that a skill gap is responsible for this, not bad luck.

Hoping that a relationship falls out of the sky is like trying to run a marathon when you haven’t trained for it. Even if you manage to make it for a couple of miles, you won’t finish and you’ll likely end up with an injury.You know you need to train for a marathon.

Dating is like training for a relationship.

Some people are naturally better at running, younger, or in better shape, but most people can train for a marathon and finish if they are willing to put in the effort.

Dating is similar.So, instead of complaining about how hard dating is, ask yourself if you are willing to take this on as a training program for getting into the relationship you want.And if the answer is yes, then let’s get to work.

I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP.

Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

I have a funny analogy for you parents out there.

Has your child ever asked you to buy them something that they had the money for?

They REEEEAAALLLY wanted it and pleaded with you to get it for them?

And when you suggested that they could use their own money to buy it, they suddenly didn’t want it as much?

I had 4 kiddos and this happened often.

It’s kind of hilarious when you think about it.

It’s human nature to be more cautious with your own money than someone else’s.

Now consider your desire to find a man to share your life with.

I hear all the time from women who want God/the Universe to bring them a man but when I ask what they are doing, the answer tends to be “Not very much”.

Now why would God/the Universe spend his or her time and effort doing the work that you should be doing?

It’s your dream for heaven’s sake!

If you want God/the Universe to help you, consider meeting them halfway or at least trying to show them you’re serious about this finding a man thing.

Because any good parent knows that it’s good for your kiddos to be self-sufficient and know how to get the things they want in this world.

I want that for you too and it’s my belief that our creator does as well.

I often find that when I put in a respectable effort, things do fall into place, but it starts with me.

I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP.

Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

Do you know someone who watches basketball all the time?

Are they a pro basketball player?

Probably not.

Because knowledge is not enough to actually get good at basketball. And the same is true for dating.

I LOVE that you’re listening to this podcast AND, I want you to take action.

Have you:Written your profile? Taken awesome pictures? Logged onto a dating site?How many new men are you talking to each week?

Are you going on dates?

Do these dates turn into relationships?If you want to find your forever guy, you need to be doing these things regularly.

Simply knowing a lot about dating is not helping you.

I talk to people who have been reading, watching webinars, listening to podcasts for years and still don’t have what they want.

If this is you, you’re doing it wrong.

Dating is a skill that can be learned and I can help you learn it fast, but you have to actually practice, not just watch.Don’t be like the guy who spends every weekend watching basketball (or football or whatever) who knows everything about the sport but never gets off the couch.

Get into the game so you can win!

I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP.

Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

I just created a brand new package to help you write an amazing dating profile! If you’d like to check it out, click here

Unavailable men are like the junk food of dating. 

If you’ve ever tried to quit anything that’s bad for you, you know how hard it is to change your preferences from things that are bad to you to things that are good for you.

It involves work, but it can be done.

The same goes for dating.

You simply must change your preferences if you’re ever going to get different results with dating.

Because dating based on attraction alone is not working for you if the only men you find attractive are not available.

You need to question everything you believe and hold dear if you are to overcome this, but it’s worth it.

Instead of only dating men you’re attracted to and then trying to change them, which is a ton of work and completely ineffective.

Put that amount of work into changing yourself, your ideas about who you should be with and your preferences.Both are hard to do, but only one has any chance of working.

It’s much easier to change yourself than another person.

If you’re to have any chance of a happy relationship, you need to start by dating better men, and that starts with actually finding them attractive.

We don’t think that our preferences are learned behaviors, but they are. We learn to prefer unavailable men and we can unlearn it.

Just like you unlearned how to prefer cigarettes, drinking, junk food, sugar.

If you’ve ever quit anything in your life, you know what this is like.

You can apply the same concepts to quitting unavailable men and enjoy way better results.

I have a great free resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP.

Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN

I just created a brand new package to help you write an amazing dating profile! If you’d like to check it out, click here.