Br. Jack Crowley

John 10:22-30

How long will you keep us in suspense? Of all the questions Jesus was asked in his life, this is one of my favorites. How long will you keep us in suspense?

Despite all of Jesus’ miracles, teachings, healings, and feedings, people kept wanting more from Jesus. People kept wanting more signs and more explanations. No matter what Jesus did, it was not enough for some.

One unfortunate tendency we have as human beings is to find something we enjoy and then squeeze the life out of it. We place unrealistic expectations on the things that make us feel good, and then when our expectations are not met, we get resentful. We end up crucifying that which we once loved.

To live a sustainable life with Christ requires balance. If we demand too much, too often, we will burn out. On other hand, if we are too passive, we will never build an authentic relationship with our savior.

An authentic relationship with God is something you cannot fake for too long. Inevitably, the frustrations of life will catch up to you and you will end up saying to God how much longer will you keep us in suspense?  The answer to that question at times will be a brutal and painful silence. Yet, it is in these hard questions and harrowing moments of acceptance that we gain intimacy with Christ. We understand our own suffering so much more in the light of he who suffered so much for us.

So how much more proof do you need that God exists? How many more religious experiences do you need until you believe that God is already at work in your life? For me oftentimes, the answer is more. I am human after all.

Much of our life we are kept in suspense, waiting for one thing to end and another thing to begin. We often believe that once this one thing ends and the next thing begins, then life will really happen, then and only then will we truly find God. So what if God is meant to be found in the meantime?

What if we were to let go of our feelings of suspense? What if we were to say that God is here, now, in the present, in the very details of our days? An act of faith like this takes courage – the courage to a be a human and the courage to be a Christian.