In the last episode, Nancy and her guest Deb Beroset chatted about what they look for in deal partners and how to get what they want. Today, they’re tackling a common hurdle in the path to love after 50 and dating after divorce: Comparison Complex.

How often do you find yourself scrolling through social media, seeing friends in seemingly perfect relationships, and feeling that pang of envy? You’re not alone! Nancy and Deb discuss how this comparison game is a major sabotage to your self-worth. But they agree that you can keep Comparison Complex from dragging you down by reframing it as a sign of what you truly desire.

Jealousy is just your intuition giving you a nudge, confirming what you want. Nancy and Deb share pearls of wisdom on how to transform moments of comparison into opportunities for self-reflection and growth.

There’s no one-size-fits-all formula for finding love. There’s no picture-perfect relationship. Your love story is unique, worthy, and it’s all YOURS. Listen to Episode 20 to embrace life’s twists and turns, and believe that your journey is leading you exactly where you need to be.

When you trust your story, you become a magnet for the love you deserve.  

Quote: "Comparison Complex can be the catalyst that gets us moving. It helps us admit that we want something we were not courageous enough to admit before."

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Girlfriend chat! Nancy and her guest, Deb Beroset, put it all on the table in their heart-to-heart about midlife love, dating after divorce, and why to never dim your light – for anyone.  Deb – founder of Moxie, in her early 60s, and newly divorced – joins Episode 19 to talk about being out in the dating world, again. She’s here to help debunk some common dating myths that hold people back when they’re looking for “3rd Act” romance. Deb says that no matter where you are in life, love is within reach.

From how to navigate dating apps to the most upfront and transparent ways to vet men before you meet them – this is a “notes from the field” episode. Tune in to learn how to lean into every new encounter with real excitement. Throw away age-related shame and limiting beliefs. And keep your heart open to the unexpected but still grounded in the moment.  

Most of all, listen to Nancy and Deb chat about what makes midlife dating enlightening, rewarding, and FUN.

Whether you’re swiping left, right, or still on the edge of jumping into dating after 50, this episode is your guide to not just finding love, but embracing the magic and mystery of it with open arms.

[20:20] There’s a real scarcity mindset about men in midlife dating, and if you wanna be right about that - good luck! It’s just not true.” - Deb

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If you’re looking for love in midlife, welcome to your Act 3! It’s the part in the story where everything comes together and the leading lady gets exactly what she wants.

The marvelous third act in life isn’t about slowing down or giving up, it's about embracing new opportunities and claiming what you want – loud and proud – especially in the realm of love. Today Nancy is breaking down how you can help your Act 3 reach its crescendo.

Stepping into the dating world in midlife can feel like a big leap, so it’s important to do it with confidence. Real confidence is about more than how you dress or maneuver small-talk (which are important), but rather the genuine assuredness that comes with knowing yourself. When you devote time to reflect on yourself, you get clear about how to attract the love that’s meant for you, and how to show up as your highest self in a loving relationship.

Don’t forget, the Finding Love approach is about Mindset, Planning, and Action – the foundation for success in midlife dating. In episode 18, Nancy explores the importance of mindset shifts, strategic planning, and intentional action so that you can date in a way that sets you up for success in your third act.

Midlife dating can easily lead to overwhelm and burnout, but when you set out on your path with clarity and purpose, the journey gets a whole lot better.

Long Life EraTM with Marla Letizia facebook link @LongLifeEra

Nancy’s LIVE appearance at the Aging Wellness Expo: https://www.reviewjournal.com/agingwellness/

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott 

“You belong in the dating world, just as much as anyone else.”

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A confidence crisis can prevent you from finding the love you deserve. So let’s practice boosting your belief in yourself and striding into midlife dating with your head held high. 

In Episode 17, we explore the intricacies of midlife love, taking a look at self-doubts, lack of confidence, and even imposter syndrome. (We’ve all been there at one time or another.)  

Join Nancy on a trip down memory lane to her LA dating days, where she felt like a fish out of water. How did she stay energized and positive? Nancy shares some practical tips to uplevel confidence on the quest for love, including the power of intentional writing and positive manifestation. 

Learn why having the right Mindset and Plan on your Finding Love path is a major game-changer in showing up for yourself. Uncover the importance of being your own ally by challenging negative self-talk and affirming your lovability.

The trick is to learn to embrace every part of yourself. Once you do, you’ll realize that Self-Love is the most powerful love of all – it opens up all the doors to what you want. 

Tune in for insights, stories, and practical tips to embrace the love you deserve.

Mentioned in this episode- selfwork.co daily planner 

Quotes: “Part of being human is that we love each other imperfectly. We are all a part of the same imperfect love story.”

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The first rule in the law of attraction is the energy you put out into the world is exactly what you will get back. That goes for everything, especially Finding Love. In Episode 16, we’re talking about how to attract love into your life. Start by being completely open and transparent about it. Declare it to the universe! No need for secret endeavors. Empower yourself to tell your story without shame, embarrassment, or worry. If you’re afraid that your friends are “tired” of hearing about how much you want to find a partner –  or even if you're tired of hearing it yourself 😆– it’s time to let your Love Flag Fly!  

When we downplay our needs and desires to ourselves and those around us, it has an impact. Self-neglect leads to self-sabotage. In this episode we explore the question: what do you gain from staying silent? Nada. Nancy shares an inspiring story about embracing her unabashed search for love in midlife.

By announcing your quest for love, you expand your network, which makes it easier to attract what you want. Remember that your energy is powerful – cooperative forces will line up to help you. Nancy talks about putting that positive energetic vibe out into the world and how, in her Chicago days, she shared her story with close friends who became lifelong supporters, cheering for her as she searched for love.

The bottom line – include friends in your love story because when you find what you’ve been looking for, they will be ready to share the joy right alongside you. If there’s one thing Nancy’s learned from her Finding Love journey is that it’s all one big love fest!

11:09 “Everybody that you love can help you further that love story, if you let them.”

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If you are putting yourself out into the world of midlife dating, you will probably come face-to-face with rejection. The trick is to not let it turn you into a cynic. 

It's easy to succumb to cynicism after missed connections, bad dates, ghosting, you name it. But remember, love thrives on belief, hope, optimism, and JOY. 

In episode 15, Nancy emphasizes the importance of playing catch and release with cynicism, addressing it head-on to keep the search for midlife love lit with positivity. The choice to make finding love fun is in your hands. Don’t let the rejections take you offline. If you need to, you can always take a break, charge your batteries, reset, then send yourself back out there.

Nancy shares a personal tale of rejection during her Chicago dating days – getting dumped by a pro wrestler! Learn how she bounced back and overcame the emotional sting. The lesson is this: Rejection may hurt, but it's not the end of your love story.

You can and will attract people who believe in love by putting positive energy forward. Nancy delves into the profound connection between how we react to past rejections and how it shapes our dating future. 

[0:54] “There’s no place for cynicism in your search for love.” 

💌 Want to feel more prepared on your midlife dating journey?
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Like any essential skill, dating small talk is something you can learn, practice, and get great at. In episode 14, we look at how to turn what may feel like a chore into a chance for real connection.

Ever find yourself oversharing too many private details on a first date as a nervous reflex? Or fumbling for things to say and sitting for minutes on end in awkward silence? We’ve all been there. It may happen because you’re nervous (naturally), but it can also be that you’re unprepared, and at the crucial moments, your mind goes blank. Small talk is what happens during any initial conversation with strangers. Which is exactly what a first date is! So let’s get into how you can craft reliable topics of date conversation to keep in your back pocket.  

In this episode, Nancy introduces the concept of Content Pillars. The big three are: Greatest Hits, New Things, and Probing Questions. These Pillars are your date conversation lifesavers. They keep the dialogue moving along in the right direction. Nancy also covers Third Rail Conversations –  instant chemistry killers (avoid at all costs).

Communication is the magic elixir of a good date. Even if you don’t have much in common, when you share stories that are interesting, illuminating, and engaging, you’ll encourage your date to do the same. Don’t miss this episode for the secrets to making small talk FUN.

[11:00] “Don’t walk into a date like a job interview. Keep the energy relaxed and light. Let your questions hang out in the back of your mind, but no need to stress about them. If you're swapping stories and keeping the conversation lively, you're on the right track!”

💌 Want to feel more prepared on your midlife dating journey?
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Your Repeatable Dating Plan is your own tailor-made playbook to dating in midlife. It will keep you organized, upbeat, and ready to find love.

In Episode 13, we talk about why you need a game plan for your 2024 dating journey. Nancy gives us the download on the Repeatable Dating Plan – a tried-and-true guideline designed to keep you from burning out and giving up.

This plan’s got three components: Mindset, Planning, and Action. When all three are working together, Finding Love feels like a fun adventure, not a dreadful chore.

RDP in a Nutshell:

Dress Code Dilemma Solved:

No more staring at your wardrobe, agonizing over, "What do I wear?" Goal: Less stress, more confidence.

Pick Your Date Spots:

Choose favorite locations near you, where you feel comfortable and safe. Goal: No more driving long distances to meet a first date (he can come to you).

Time Management 101:

Be honest with yourself about how many dates you want to do in a week, and how long you spend on each one. Goal: Your time is precious, so stop overcommitting.  

The heart of your RDP is ensuring you actually ENJOY yourself while you look for love. Dating in midlife can be interesting, exciting, and fun – IF you have the right approach. Listen to episode 13 for more insights and practical wisdom on creating your Repeatable Dating Plan for 2024.

(21:45) “Take a look at how you can start 2024 with a different approach to dating and Finding Love. Enjoy it! If you’re not enjoying yourself, you’re bringing negative energy to your dates.”

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Letting love into your life is not just about outward appearances and actions. You need to look inward and root out the energetic barriers that block love and keep you stuck. In Episode 12, Nancy encourages us to kick off 2024 by taking an honest look at the physical and emotional spaces in our lives. How open are you to finding something real and lasting? Are parts of you resisting change? Are you putting up roadblocks to love? In this episode, Nancy tells an illuminating story: A few years ago she was chatting about finding love with Arielle Ford, the bestselling author of Wabi Sabi Love. She told Arielle that she had a bedside lamp that had been broken for years. Arielle immediately said, “You’ve got to fix that lamp!” As soon as Nancy had it repaired, a cascade of events quickly led to love.  Moral of the story? Don't leave things broken, unattended, and gathering dust in a corner. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you’re open and ready when, deep down, your light is turned off.

(11:30) “Don’t leave things in your life shuttered, don’t leave them broken, collecting dust. Give attention to the parts of your romantic life you want to ignite. Create a mindset where you truly are ready to receive love.”

*Mentioned in this episode: Arielle Ford - Wabi Sabi Love

💌 Want to feel more prepared on your midlife dating journey?
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Romantic snowfalls. Cozy firesides. Hallmark Christmas movies. The holidays can be hard if you’re looking for (and not yet finding) love. So let me tell you some wild stories I’ve heard recently (to take your mind off the mistletoe). 

Dating for the first time in midlife can lead to nutty stories, like the quest for an online overseas boyfriend, to tax fraud, to unexpected carjackings. 

In episode 11, Nancy spills some tea on the hijinx that can ensue when stepping into the dating arena later in life.

After you pick your jaw off the floor, remember this: Finding love is a healing journey in itself, so don’t rush it or discount it just because you’ve got your eyes on the destination. The path is as enriching as the destination. Your search for love is a mirror, reflecting who you are and who you want to become. Be patient, embrace the commitment, and relish the self-discovery.

Nancy offers advice for navigating the holiday dating scene with an open heart. Don’t hide away because you’re single. Everyone you love is part of your love story, and that includes friends, kids, family. Look at this season as a start – here comes a new year with fresh possibilities. 

“Along the way I learned a lot about loving myself, the kind of relationship I wanted to manifest, how I wanted to show up. And that itself is a healing journey.”

💌 Want to feel more prepared on your midlife dating journey?
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