Finding Your Village

Thank you so much for listening to this episode today. This episode is really just to express my gratitude and provide a conclusion update to everyone. It's a quick one, and I'm here to announce that I've decided to end this season of my life in podcasting. As a result, there will be no new episodes of the Finding Your Village podcast. However, all 137 episodes will remain available for you to listen to anytime as resources.

I just want to take the time to say thank you. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart to everyone who has listened to one episode, all 137 episodes, or anywhere in between. I appreciate you and the opportunity to have recorded these episodes over the past three-plus years. This podcast has been a jumping-off point for me in pivoting my career and helping me settle into parenting. It has been a significant outlet for me to process my experiences as a parent, especially since I launched the podcast in February of 2020 and entered the global pandemic and parenthood the following month. This podcast has been with me through the ups and downs of parenting, the pandemic, and my recovery journey. I'm incredibly grateful for it, but I've come to the conclusion that the time has come for me to end this season.

I also want to say thank you to every single guest who has appeared on this show. The connections I've made through interviewing guests have been phenomenal and way more than I expected. Some guests have become close personal friends, important members of my parenting village and support system, business partners, and more. Some conversations have shaped the next chapter of my life, especially as a parent. I just wanted to express my sincere and heartfelt gratitude to every single guest and listener.

While I feel both sadness and peace with my decision to stop recording new episodes, I'm also excited to move on to the next phase of my development as a birth worker. This podcast was the jumping-off point for me to pivot from my previous corporate job to now working with Postpartum Support International and Birthing from Within. It's now my job to help support parents as they embark on their parenting journey, and I can't express enough how grateful I am for that.

If you'd like to stay in touch and see what I'm up to, I'm not going anywhere—I'm just pivoting where I show up in life and online. You can find me mainly on TikTok at Finding Your Village, as well as on Instagram at Finding Your Village, and on my website at findingyourvillage.com. My contact information is available there, so feel free to email me at [email protected].

To wrap this up, I just want to say thank you one last time. I appreciate you all, and I sincerely hope that you stay healthy, safe, and connected.

Get in touch with me: 

• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok
• Find past episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

Thank you so much for listening, in today's episode, I'll be discussing the concept of being a "good enough" parent. This idea might be surprising to some, but it's an essential perspective that can help relieve the pressures and anxieties that often accompany parenthood. So, let's dive in.

The term "good enough parent" was first introduced by British psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott in the 1950s. The concept suggests that parents don't need to be perfect; instead, they simply need to provide a loving, nurturing, and safe environment that allows their children to grow and develop into healthy, well-adjusted adults. It's important to recognize that no parent is perfect, and that's okay. All parents make mistakes, and the key is to learn from those mistakes and strive to do better moving forward.

So, what are some practical tips for becoming a "good enough" parent? One of the main aspects is being present and attentive to your child's needs. This means listening to them, empathizing with their feelings, and validating their experiences. Emotional connection is crucial for your child's well-being.

Setting boundaries are also important components of the "good enough" parenting model. Setting boundaries creates a safe and secure environment for your child, helping them understand the consequences of their actions and teaching them important life skills. 

In Birthing from Within birth classes we do an exercise about what a good enough parent is. I’ll summarize it and feel free to join in. To start, think about the term “bad parent”, now write down or think of some words associated with what it means for someone considered to be a bad parent. Next, think about the term “good parent”, and write down or think about the words or phrases you associate with what it means to be a good parent. Finally, think about the term “good enough parent” and jot down or think of the phrases that come to mind. Do you find that the phrases associated with being a good enough parent are somewhere in the middle of the first two, perhaps closer linked with being a good parent? Maybe they are a step down from being a good parent. For instance, if you thought of reading to your kids everyday as something associated with being a good parent, perhaps you could think of reading to your kids every other day or every week as a good enough parent alternative. 

In conclusion, remember that being a good enough parent is about progress, not perfection. Give yourself grace and be patient with yourself as you navigate the ups and downs of parenthood. Your love, support, and presence are what truly matter to your child. I hope that you found this episode enlightening and that it helps you on your journey towards becoming a "good enough" parent.  

Get in touch with me: 

• Sign up for a live virtual birth class in April or May
• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok
• Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

Thank you so much for listening. In today’s episode, I interview Dr. Sam Rader, who is a former psychologist who took what she learned about childhood development, personality, and growth   and turned it into a new healing modality called Source Code. Source Code allows us to peel back the curtain on why we are the way we are, and what we can do about it. It helps us understand how our negative patterns get formed during childhood, and shows us that we can let go of our outdated defense mechanisms to reveal more of who we really are--our true essence of joy, ease, and love. We can use Source Code to recode ourselves and to parent our children differently, so that we enjoy happier, healthier, more beautiful lives.

How to follow Dr. Sam:

• Website
• Instagram
• Parenting as Love Course

How to get in touch with me: 

• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Get the Postpartum Online Class!
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok
• Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

 Today, I’ll be introducing a new preparation method that I have been working on for awhile now! I call it the LEAP Method and it is a four-component system for preparing to have a baby. 

I have taught birth classes over the years, created pregnancy and postpartum content and worked with hundreds of birth and parenting professionals and my takeaway from all that work is that there are four main things that parents can do to prepare for the arrival of their new baby.Those four things became the LEAP Method, a four-component system designed to help new parents prepare for the arrival of their baby. 

So here is what LEAP stands for. LEAP represents the four things that all parents can focus on to prepare to bring home a new baby. L stands for Learning, E is for Emotional awareness, A is for Administrative tasks, and P is for products:

• Learning:
  1. Importance of acquiring knowledge and skills for baby care, postpartum self-care, and coping strategies
  2. Adapting the learning process to suit individual family needs
• Emotional Awareness:
  1. Recognizing and navigating the emotional challenges of new parenthood, including hormonal changes and mood swings
  2. Importance of understanding perinatal mood disorders for both parents
  3. Resources available to help cope with these emotions
• Administrative Tasks:
  1. Planning for and completing necessary tasks before and after the baby's arrival, such as doctor's appointments, maternity/paternity leave, and finding a pediatrician
  2. Importance of staying organized for a smooth transition into parenthood
• Products:
  1. Identifying essential products and services for new parents, including physical, digital, and service-related products
  2. Balancing priorities and budget while choosing products
  3. The role of professionals such as doulas, lactation consultants, and postpartum doulas in your support system

Links mentioned:

• Get the Confident New Parent Class!
• Click here to take the 1 minute podcast survey 
• Contact form

Get in touch with me: 

• Sign up for a live virtual birth class in April or May
• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok
• Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

Today’s episode is a quick update on a small change that I'm making for a short period. I am switching to doing bi-weekly shows until my kids are back in school in the fall. The show will come out twice a month, every other Sunday. We have decided to have our son who's in preschool stay home with me for both the spring and summer. I have two little kids, four and six. My six-year-old will be home with me during the summer. However, it makes more sense for our four-year-old to stay home with me instead of finishing the entire school year for personal, work, and financial reasons. So, I am paring back my workload to align with my goals and priorities, which are my kids and going into more of mom mode for this season.

If you appreciate astrology or follow astrology, right now is a cool time. Pluto just entered Aquarius, which is supposed to bring about significant change and realign goals and values. The last time Pluto was in Aquarius was during the American Revolution and the French Revolution. It was a time of change, upheaval, and paradigm shifts.

The show will be every other week from April through August of this year, and my goal is to go back to every single week in September. I've been feeling pulled to do more work with parents directly. I've been offering on-demand recorded online classes, but I am now going to do live virtual birth classes once a month on a weekend. I used to do them once a week for four weeks, but now I'm shifting into a workshop or intensive structure with the birth class to align with people's schedules. The first one will be in the middle of April, and the second one will be in May.

If you're interested in taking a birth class, check out my website for more information about the birth classes. It's through Birthing from Within, and that's the type of class that I teach. I just wanted to give an update about the change in the podcast frequency and the fact that I am now offering live virtual birth classes once a month.

Thank you for listening, and I appreciate each and every one of you who listens. I'll include a link to the survey that I put out a couple of months ago in the show notes of this episode. The survey takes one minute to fill out, and I'm asking for your feedback on what you'd like to hear this season.

Click here to take the 1 minute survey!

Thank you, and stay safe, healthy, and connected.

How to get in touch with me: 

• Sign up for a live virtual birth class in April or May
• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Get the Confident New Parent Class!
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok

Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Find out more about the 12 week coaching program here: https://reparentingandparenting.com/

Thank you so much for listening. Today we are talking about play therapy, a treatment modality for children experiencing emotional, behavioral, or adjustment issues. We discuss the benefits of play therapy, how to find a play therapist, and when it might be appropriate for your child. Our guest is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW) and Doctor of Educational Psychology (EDD),  Lindsey Epstein Webster. Lindsey is a therapist who has been in practice now for 12 years. She specializes in working with children and families and has been trained in attachment based non-directive play therapy. She is also the parent to a beautiful 5 year old little girl. Prior to the pandemic Lindsey did play therapy in office and now predominantly works with parents on offering dyadic strategies to help improve their children's ability to identify and express emotions and improve overall behavior in both the home and academic setting.

In this episode we discussed:

• Definition and explanation of play therapy
• First session expectations for parents and children
• Age recommendations for beginning play therapy
• Explanation of various terms: non-directive play therapy, dyadic therapy, and adjustment disorder
• Duration of play therapy for children
• Signs that a child might benefit from play therapy
• The role of parents in the play therapy process
• Finding a play therapist
• Challenges of play therapy during the pandemic and alternative options
• Importance of play therapy techniques for parenting

Key Points:

• Play therapy is a primary modality for treating emotional, behavioral, and adjustment issues in nonverbal to early elementary age children.
• Non-directive play therapy allows the child to guide the session while the therapist observes and interprets their play.
• Dyadic therapy involves the parent and child working together with the therapist.
• Adjustment disorder is a general diagnosis used when a change in a child's life is causing emotional or behavioral problems.
• The length of play therapy can vary depending on the child's needs and external factors.
• Parents can find play therapists through the National Association for Registered Play Therapists, insurance providers, or word of mouth.
• Play therapy techniques can be beneficial for both the child and parent in navigating emotional challenges.

How to follow Lindsey:

• Website

How to get in touch with me: 

• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Get the Postpartum Online Class!
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok
• Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

In episode 128, we talked about the phases and stages of labor and we mainly focused on the mother’s experience. In today’s episode, we are going to focus more on the baby’s experience and what gets labor going.

In this episode we discuss:

• What Starts Labor:
  • The uterus goes through hormonal and physical changes to prepare for labor and delivery.
  • The baby's maturing organs produce surfactant, which sends signals to start labor.
  • Oxytocin hormone causes uterine contractions that lead to cervical dilation and birth.
• Baby's Experience During Labor:
  • The baby is gently pushed down into the pelvis and moves through the birth canal.
  • The baby's head may mold and change shape to fit through the narrow opening of the pelvis.
  • Hormones produced by the mother's body can provide natural pain relief and promote bonding.
  • After birth, the baby takes its first breath, may cry, and is often placed skin-to-skin with the mother.
• Click here to take the 1 minute survey to give me feedback on what topics you'd like to hear in future episodes

How to get in touch with me: 

• Get the Postpartum Online Class!
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok
• Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

Thank you so much for listening. Today I am talking to Heidi Mills about what we have been noticing on social media in the birth world. There is a lot of division between doulas and OBGYNs and/or clinicians and non-clinicians over spreading misinformation on social media. Heidi and talk about what we have noticed and how it can impact pregnant people. 

Heidi Mills is a Certified Birth Doula, owner of Bloc Births LLC, and content creator at the handle "whatadoulado". As a hospital-based doula, she has had the opportunity to support a wide range of births, from unmedicated deliveries to planned c-sections. Heidi is passionate about expanding doula care to be accessible to all birth experiences, so every family can have the support they need during this pivotal experience.

In this episode, we discuss the growing division between the more holistic, natural-focused world of doulas and alternative practitioners and the more medically-centered care providers. The episode emphasizes the importance of collaboration between medical professionals and doulas to lead to the best possible outcomes for parents and their babies.

We discussed:

• The growing division between the holistic and medical approach to pregnancy and birth
• The role of social media in perpetuating this division
• The importance of vetting sources on social media and seeking balanced and collaborative care
• Avoiding divisive language and focusing on helping pregnant individuals
• Being mindful of raw emotions when creating content for social media and taking a step back to process them properly
• Understanding the intentions of content creators on social media and using the "not interested" button or blocking them if necessary
• The role of doulas in providing physical, emotional, and informational support during childbirth and the importance of never making absolute statements
• The need to focus on building skills to provide better support to pregnant individuals.

How to follow Heidi:

• TikTok
• Instagram

How to get in touch with me: 

• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Get the Postpartum Online Class!
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok
• Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

Thank you so much for listening. Today I have invited a friend back to talk about why gentle parenting is so hard. Marisa Hughes is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Reparenting and Parenting Coach and mom of 2. She specializes in trauma therapy and is certified in perinatal mental health. Marisa is passionate about helping moms reparent themselves so they can break generational cycles and parent their children with authenticity and intention.

How to get in touch with Marisa:

• Website
• Instagram

How to get in touch with me: 

• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Get the Postpartum Online Class!
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok

Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show

Thank you so much for listening. Today we are talking about the transformation that happens when you become a parent and how that can impact your decision making abilities. Our guest to discuss this is Marin Laukka. 

Marin Laukka is a decision coach and speaker with a Master's Degree in positive developmental psychology and certifications in budget coaching, life coaching, and yoga. As the business owner of Yes&, Marin passionately supports women with 1:1 and group coaching programs to overcome exhausting patterns of perfectionism and self-doubt so they can make confident decisions that lead to authentic meaning and freedom for their life. Over 276 clients and audiences around the United States have applied Marin’s coaching to end procrastination, overthinking, indecision, and regret so they can clarify what they want, strengthen self-trust, and experience true happiness.

Marin is also the #1 New Release author of Ready Enough: Your 7-Step Guide for Life's Hardest Decisions. For an introduction to her work, preview chapter 1 for free at www.yesandbymarin.com/readyenough.

How to get in touch with Marin:

• Website
• Instagram

How to get in touch with me: 

• Take the 4 Day Birth Class
• Get the Postpartum Online Class!
• Follow me on Instagram and on TikTok

Find other episodes at: www.findingyourvillage.com/podcast

Visit www.keepsakecastle.com today!

Support the show