Recorded 07.18.2025

In this episode of Rowing with the Homies, I dig into the complex and often contradictory ways society defines adulthood. Starting with the UK's recent decision to lower its voting age to 16, I explore historical precedents in both the UK and US, prompting a broader discussion on the varying ages at which we grant privileges and assign responsibilities, from military service to purchasing alcohol. This leads into a reflection on how the shift where caring for others and fulfilling life's tasks transform into an overwhelming burden can be exacerbated by depression.

Recorded 07.14.2025

In this episode of Rowing with the Homies, I dive into the nuanced and often challenging journey of "growing up" – a process far deeper than just accumulating years. I explore what it means to be a balanced adult: someone who embraces life's complexities, engages in difficult but crucial conversations, genuinely considers others' needs, receives feedback with grace, and maintains radical honesty, all while holding onto an excitement for continuous exploration. My ongoing, rich conversations with my partner, Eva, serve as a living laboratory for understanding this "uncomfortable grace" in real time. I then extend this idea to the profound influence of behavior models – from parents and teachers to friends and partners – exploring how we discern positive patterns, evolve beyond those that no longer serve us, and consciously become positive forces ourselves. Finally, in the "Today Depression Feels Like" segment, I connect the themes of maturity and influence to the experience of depression, exploring how embracing the discomfort of maturing can provide a path to navigate its complex currents with more understanding and agency, even when it feels like being a child, lost and unsure.

Recorded 07.10.2025

In this episode of Rowing with the Homies, I dive into the world of tinkering, exploring it as a form of healthy play—especially through the lens of making music with synthesizers and samplers. This leads to a discussion on why embracing our "inner tinkerer" is crucial for mental well-being and healing in adulthood, offering a powerful tool for stress relief, creativity, and self-expression. Finally, in the "Today Depression Feels Like" segment, I share a personal perspective on understanding depression not as a rigid tug-of-war, but as an ebb and flow, and how tools like play, exercise, and socializing can help us navigate these inevitable peaks and valleys with greater gentleness and grace.

In this episode of Finlos Lives, I'm diving deep into the creative process, from that initial spark of an idea to the sometimes messy, often surprising reality of bringing it to life. As I navigate the challenges of creating original music with my new synthesizers and sampler, I'm exploring why ideas rarely translate perfectly, the inevitable mistakes and time distortions that pop up, and how imposter syndrome can whisper doubts. I'll share strategies like breaking down overwhelming tasks, embracing imperfection, learning through doing, and finding inspiration in the world around you. Ultimately, this episode is about shifting focus from external validation to the intrinsic rewards of creation: the joy of learning, the thrill of newness, and the profound satisfaction of completing something, even if it's different from what I first imagined. Join me as I embrace the unfolding melody of my own creative pursuits.

Recorded on 07.01.2025

In this episode of Rowing with the Homies, I explore the immense scale of the United States, from its diverse natural landscapes and weather patterns to its varied cultures and the inherent challenges of governing such a vast nation. This extensive cross-country journey sparks a deeper reflection on our own internal landscapes, prompting a discussion about embracing the multiplicity within ourselves rather than striving for a singular, unchanging self. Finally, I share a personal reflection on how depression today feels like "the longest hour of the night, just before sunrise," a quiet and enduring struggle defined by the act of waiting for internal light to return.

In this episode I talk about life while being away from home for work: long work days, long walks, and long periods of time alone. I describe what a day working in Cleveland, OH looks like for me, I also describe my experience so far using the five senses.

Recorded on 06.04.2025

In this episode of Rowing with the Homies, I delve into the multifaceted anxieties surrounding upcoming travel, starting with the current stresses of air travel, from evolving security measures like REAL ID to the impact of air traffic control staffing shortages. This leads me to explore the broader discomforts and potential positives of extended time away from home, including disruptions to routine, the awkwardness of new social situations, and the profound opportunities for growth and new experiences. Finally, I share a personal reflection on how depression today feels like the act of letting go of rigid expectations and opening up to the unpredictable flow of life, especially in the context of travel and personal growth.

Recorded on 06.02.2025

In this episode of Rowing with the Homies, I explore the profound human need for magic and wonder in an increasingly scientific world, drawing inspiration from the recent spectacular displays of the Aurora Borealis. I delve into the scientific explanations for the aurora's southern reach, alongside its rich interpretations across cultures, from dancing ancestors to omens of fear. This leads to a discussion on how natural beauty acts as vital spiritual fuel, allowing us to connect with something larger than ourselves and find moments of awe. Finally, I share a personal reflection on how depression can manifest as the profound loss of this very wonder, leaving us disengaged from the world's inherent magic.

In this episode Finlos Lives I'm diving into why some of life's changes, especially those tied to decisions we've made, are truly permanent. We often find ourselves dwelling on regrets, replaying "what ifs" and "if onlys," wishing for a "redo" button on past choices. This longing for a different outcome, whether it's a career path not taken or words we wish we could unsay, can leave us stuck in the past. I'll explore why we struggle to accept the consequences of our actions and why the idea of a "time machine" is so appealing when we're trying to avoid accountability or uncomfortable truths. Join me as I discuss how clinging to these past decisions and worrying about future outcomes stops us from living fully in the present.

Recorded on 05.19.2025

In this episode of Rowing with the Homies, I tackle the complex interplay of leadership, age, and personal well-being. I open by examining the recent news concerning President Biden's health, and the broader discussion it ignites about the age and fitness of global leaders like Donald Trump. This leads me to explore how different cultures, from the epic of Beowulf to African and Indigenous cultures perceive and define leadership across various life stages. I then pivot to delving into the uncomfortable truth of how Western society, particularly American culture, views aging – often as a taboo to be fought, rather than a natural progression, and how this contrasts sharply with cultures that revere their elders. Finally, I share a reflection on managing depression in midlife, finding a surprising quiet strength by leveraging the unique advantages of accumulated wisdom and continued physical health. Join me as I connect the global stage of leadership to the intimate landscape of mental well-being, all part of finding my rhythm in the ongoing journey.

Episode note: my microphone failed and I had to use audio from a backup room mic to produce this episode (a good reminder to me to always check the equipment before starting!). Because the quality of this audio was poor, I had to use some tools to restore it which lead to audio artifacts and glitchy sounds, for which I apologize.