As our holiday festivities continue, we're scrolling through a list of Hallmark Christmas movies... and fixing them. Is there any way to redeem these crazy generic holiday romantic comedies, all featuring big city career women returning to their hometowns to find true love and the meaning of Christmas? Yeah, we've got you covered, as we script-doctor these turkeys and randomly add Snow Misers, Sharknadoes, angry chickens, a certain fruit-obsessed Martian, and lots more perfectly reasonable improvements. So it's safe to turn on your TV again this month. We just saved Christmas.

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