Every year, dozens of ridiculous identical holiday movies are unleashed by Hallmark, Lifetime, Netflix, and the like. (They're so cookie-cutter that many of them literally involve cutting cookies.) And every year, we try to fix them by making them weirder. So we've selected a few new Christmas movies, and we're discussing their plots (featuring time travel, glassblowing, and pickleball) and casts (featuring, as always, Lacey Chabert). Then we're randomly inserting some strange new element (a camel with wings, perhaps) into each movie so it meets our strict weirdness standards. There, we just saved Christmas. Pass the figgy pudding.

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