Welcome to the Fraudulationship to Freedom Podcast. I’m your host, Meg South, and this is episode 54, Rebuilding Your Life From the Ground Up After Narcissistic and Sociopathic Abuse.

Your life is in shambles thanks to the fact that you were targeted by a narcissist or sociopath. It feels pretty bleak. Everything you’ve worked for, the life you planned for feels like it’s imploded. Maybe you’re displaced and have to find a new place to live. Maybe you are stuck in a low-paying job. Maybe you need childcare or pet care, a car, or some other essential. This is not what you had planned, and you are angry. Rightly so. Believe me, I get it.

I’m not going to try to convince you things aren’t as bad as they are. It’s very likely that they are as bad as all that. Statistically, it’s women who suffer the most financially after a divorce, not the men. I don’t have any hard research to point to, but I’m guessing that women coming out of a narcissistic or sociopathically abusive situation suffer all around to a greater degree than if abuse wasn’t part of the picture. There’s a lot to contend with. A lot.

It may be hard to even know where to begin. That’s what I’d like to talk about in this episode.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

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If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

I’ve been thinking about the idea of self-abandonment. How do we recognize it? And more, how do we keep from abandoning ourselves ever again. Because if we can’t count on ourselves to stay present, to have our own backs, to act in our own best interests, then we are in big trouble.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

Welcome to the Fraudulationship to Freedom podcast. I’m your host, Meg South. This is Episode 52: What’s Logotherapy and How Can It Help Me Heal?

When I was in high school, I read the book, Man’s Search for Meaning, by Victor Frankl. This book had a huge impact on my life. Victor Frankl was a psychiatrist who developed logotherapy after four years in the concentration camps during WWII. He believed that humans are motivated to find meaning in life and that meaning can be found in even the most dire of circumstances.He thought that a lot of us have “existential angst” and live in a kind of “exetential vacuum.”

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

Welcome to the Fraudulationship to Freedom Podcast. I’m your host, Meg South. This is episode 51. Today’s topic is Mindfulness of Current Thoughts. Mindfulness of Current thoughts is the last DBT distress tolerance skill and the last episode in the DBT skills series I’ve been working through with you over the last couple of months of episodes. I’ll be taking the next two weeks off and be back again the week of February 20th. In the meantime, if you have any questions about any of the DBT skills I’ve covered in the last several episodes, please feel free to DM me on Instagram or Facebook.

In today’s episode, I’ll be talking about what mindfulness of current thoughts is, why it’s important to observe your thoughts, and how to be mindful of current thoughts.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

Welcome to the Fraudulationship to Freedom podcast. I’m your host, Meg South. This is episode #50. Today I’m going to talk about the DBT distress tolerance skills of Half-Smile and Willing Hands.

Specifically, I’ll cover why practice the half-smile and willing hands skills, how to practice them and I’ll offer a few times when you can incorporate this into your life.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

Welcome to the Fraudulationship to Freedom podcast. I’m your host, Meg South. This is episode #49. Today I’m going to talk about the DBT distress tolerance skills of Turning the Mind and Willingness. 

Specifically, I’ll talk about the concept of turning the mind and how to shift your thinking, the difference between willfulness and willingness and why it’s important to healing from narcissistic and sociopathic abuse, and finally how to go from a state of willfulness to willingness.

In episode 48, I talked about reality acceptance and why accepting reality is essential to healing. But what happens if we just don’t want to accept reality? What do we do then? We have a couple of choices.

Learning these skills can take your healing to another level. Are you ready? Let's go!

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

Welcome to the Fraudulationship to Freedom podcast. I’m your host, Meg South. This is episode #48.

Today’s episode is about reality acceptance skills. Reality acceptance skills are another set of DBT distress tolerance skills. When we’ve been conned by a sociopath, it’s extremely difficult to believe that someone could be so evil. And I use the word evil deliberately and in a literal sense. If sociopaths are not evil, I don’t know who would qualify to be called evil. These predators deliberately sought us out as prey to accomplish their own ends without a thought or even a care as to how their lies and manipulations would impact us. This is because, as I have said in past episodes, sociopaths have no conscience. Accepting the reality that we’ve been duped so thoroughly is rough. But the sooner we accept reality, the sooner we can move toward healing.

Today I’m going to specifically talk about

· What reality acceptance skills are

· Goals of reality acceptance

· The difference between reality acceptance and giving up

· The difference between acceptance and reality acceptance

· What has to be accepted

· Factors that get in the way of radical acceptance

· Radical acceptance step-by-step

Let’s jump in.

Radical acceptance is the complete and total openness to the facts of reality as they are, without throwing a tantrum or responding with willful ineffectiveness. I’ll expand on this definition throughout this episode, but I want to just mention briefly what reality acceptance is not.

Radical acceptance is not approval. It is not compassion or love. It is not being passive, giving up, or giving in, and it is not against change.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

In this episode, I'm going to talk about the DBT skill of Improving the Moment. IMPROVE is used as an acronym to help you remember how you can practice the skill.

Improving the moment is replacing immediate negative events with more positive ones by making the moment more positive and easier to tolerate. Some strategies involve encouraging yourself or by creating meaning in the situation, imagining changes in the situation. Some involve changing your body's responses to events (relaxing). Prayer and focusing on one thing in the moment have to do with acceptance and letting go.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

A lot of trauma survivors struggle with feeling emotionally overwhelmed -- at least sometimes. And, unfortunately, we don't always know how to help ourselves feel better. We might even feel guilty for taking time for ourselves. In this episode, I talk about the skill of self-soothing. And it is a skill that we can learn. Like all skills, it takes practice and commitment. 

What is Self-Soothing?

Self-soothing is being comforting, nurturing, gentle and responsive to our own needs.

When to Self-Soothe

Self-soothing activities reduce vulnerability to Emotion Mind and to acting impulsively and they reduce the sense of deprivation that is often a precursor to feelings of vulnerability. They help people tolerate pain and distress without making things worse.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.

Wise Mind ACCEPTS is a distress tolerance skill that uses distraction in a variety of ways when you can’t immediately address distressing feelings.

ACCEPTS is an acronym that stands for Activities, Contributing, Comparisons, Emotions, Pushing Away, Thoughts, Sensations. In this episode, I discuss each of these in detail.

New Podcast: How to Spot a Military Phony Online and Avoid Being Targeted.

This new podcast is a limited episode series designed to expose the epidemic of military phony predators trolling online dating and social media platforms. Learn how to identify these cons and keep yourself safe. Please spread the word to anyone you know who uses dating or social media platforms. You can subscribe on Spotify, Apple, or wherever you listen to podcasts. https://anchor.fm/s/730b1bfc/podcast/rss

Connect on Social Media

You can connect with me on Instagram @fraudulationship or on Facebook @fraudulationship or MegSouth.Fraudulationship.

I’d love to hear from you!

Review, Subscribe & Share

Please leave a review on Apple Podcasts (Anchor doesn’t support reviews.)

If you find this episode helpful, please subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, Amazon Music, Audible or your favorite podcast app. Here's the RSS link https://anchor.fm/s/670536f8/podcast/rss .

Also, be sure to share with anyone you know who may find it helpful. I appreciate your efforts in spreading the word!

This podcast is not meant as a substitute for therapy or medical advice.