Alex and Simon are on the outs with everyone and looking to change that. Luann teaches Victoria how to drive. Avery gets ready for college applications. Jill shames Ally. Everyone forgets about Cindy. Sonja hosts a burlesque themed party.

Ramona hosts a party for herself, oh, and Sonja. Cindy doesn't know how to deal with kids. Alex fights with everyone, and Simon doesn't need to be waxed.

Luann and Ramona host sweet sixteen parties for Victoria and Avery ON THE SAME DAY!!! Scandal!! Jill has a birthday part and Bobby wants to talk with Simon. Just talk. In a private corner.

We return from Morocco and our own personal trials with illnesses, to find that Sonja is BANKRUPT or something. Ramona, sensing the fortune teller had a point, tries to spice it up with Mario. Alex and Simon model a line of granny panties and Luann has one of the best lines in the show, ever.

The Wives finish up their trip to Morocco. Alex tries to be the Mom but Luann is better at it than she is. Kelly makes sense, for once. We forget Cindy was here.

Cindy continues her journey into being ... whatever sort of housewife she's going to be. There's an argument about car seats that goes on way too long, and LuAnn shines as the Hostess with the Mostess.

Justine and David go to Morocco with the ladies! The Four Non Blondes show up and have a wonderful time. The Blonde, however, hate everything and are immediately looking for a way to get out of interacting (or sleep, in Alex's case). And then Brad shows up...

Luann decides that the Ladies will all be going to Morocco. Ramona drinks a case of pinot and the four non-blondes drum in a circle and drink apple cider (vinegar?). Dorinda makes a SURPRISING guest appearance that shocks and awes us all!

Cindy continues to bother David. Justine admits to never seeing Potomac. Chris March helps out Sonja, who then immediately forgets to wear panties.

Justine and David learn all about the peeking order of the Housewives, along with Cindy Barshop, with Brian Boylan! His latest book tells you everything you didn't know about the franchise and we chat about some Ye Olde Housewifery. You can follow Brian on Twitter at @BrianJMoylan and order your copy of the book at thehousewivesbook.com