Over ten years ago, in a bathroom of a swanky stranger's apartment in downtown Los Angeles, strung out and afraid, I looked up and whispered: “God, I need help.” That moment became the turning point. On June 23, 2015, I put down meth, in August, cannabis, and September 23, alcohol and every other substance. I haven’t picked them up since.

A decade later, I’m celebrating ten continuous years of sobriety. In this episode, I take you through the journey: the years of relapse and secrecy, the love and loss of my first partner, the shadow of HIV stigma and IV drug use, and the long climb into recovery. Inspired by the interview styles of Terry Gross (Fresh Air) and Sam Fragoso (Talk Easy), I answer six deeply personal questions (AI-Generated) about addiction, queerness, creativity, grief, and what remains unfinished ten years in.

This isn’t just a story about staying sober. It’s about what sobriety has carved within me. A canyon of stillness, a river of resilience, and a practice of presence, peace and contentment. For anyone listening who is struggling with their own relationship to substances, whether it’s meth or wine, cannabis or cocaine, you don’t have to do this alone. There is a path forward. There is peace.