Genuine Human Connection

I explore the social connections humans feel, seek, or find missing because of the modern, westernized tradition of recognizing the date a person was born. 

The concept of yearly recognizing the date of our own birth has changed over human evolution.  Overall, the birthday celebration is a relatively modern invention, and a yearly one is primarily a westernized invention.  It is this yearly birthday recognition that I am exploring today in this episode of Genuine Human Connection.

CREDITS

Mark Day, Generic Facebook Birthday Wishes, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYZ3iaS5hyg

Mary Coussons-Read PhD, CBS Denver, Happy Birthday On Facebook: Too Easy?, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ySjw7akG8xs

Professor John Cacioppo - Connected Minds: Loneliness, Social Brains and the Need for Community, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iu6RM_Ib30A

Eskil Burck, Learning Psychology YouTube channel, psychology of shared birthday,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YH0reKn_MoA

Robert Cialdini and Steve Martin, Influence at Work YouTube channel, the Science of Persuasion, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFdCzN7RYbw

Vanessa Van Edwards, Birthday Depression: Why Birthdays Are So Hard, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TasCmAjePbA

Johann Hari - This could be why you're depressed or anxious, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MB5IX-np5fE

Emile Warot - The power of little celebrations in our lives, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzIbbJed-ic

Nouman Ali Khan, FreeQuranEducation YouTube Channel, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSatpMSRhSM

MUSIC

Bach Cello Suite No. 1, G Major, Prelude by Cooper Cannell

Heart of Nowhere by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1400045
Artist: http://incompetech.com/

One listener had this to say:  “When you asked the listener to consider what is the opposite of loneliness, my response was ‘fulfillment.’”  On this episode of Genuine Human Connection, I address the possible solution to connection as being that of fulfillment.  But what is fulfillment?

SOURCES
William Guy, The Relationship Between Human Fulfillment and Ethics, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UxXiwV7mrD0

Simon Sinek, If You Don't Understand People, You Don't Understand Business, 99u, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=llKvV8_T95M

Adam Grant, Who Are the Takers, Givers, and Matchers in the Workplace, Google Zeitgeist, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zxEzJFvO2oE

Candace Vogler, Ultimate Fulfillment & Human Perfection, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8DpB_X94d4&t=2289s

Art Bejarano, Super Human Longevity with Dr Steve Hruby, The Power of Human Connection; a Secret of Longevity, Fulfillment, & Happiness, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AN15F2bIlDw

Olivia Aguilar, Sustainability and Human Fulfillment, TEDxDenisonU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNFx2uI5v0g

Russell Brand, The Answer to Your Problem Is Not in Your Head, Commune, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5Okl5V5NRM

Huston Smith, Human Fulfillment, Search for America, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5kTW4lLA9U

MUSIC
Dwarf Star by Freedom Trail Studio
Slappy Clov by Godmode
Eternal Garden by Dan Henig

In my exploration about what genuine human connection is, I believe that one of the fundamental components is empathy.  But, what is empathy?  And what makes empathy so complicated?  Feeling someone else’s pain, recognizing it in ourselves, and sympathizing, should be an easy thing if it’s built into our neuro programing since the times of tribal living. 

MUSIC
Chris Zabriskie
ELPHNT

CREDITS
Jamil Zaki, Building Empathy in a Fractured World, Stanford Alumni, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FC3sWzIgfqw

Nadine Chevolleau, On Civil Society, Toronto Public Library, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbWC5VXB4sU&t=1606s

Chris Frith, Empathy, Serious Science, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VIoA4VnbUgE

Sir Ken Robinson, Dalai Lama Center for Peace and Education, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yu2zcmb3yAQ

Béalleka Makau, Radical Empathy Disrupts Entitlement, TEDxGrinnellCollege, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kzQtK60yOxc

Chloé Valdary, Founder of Theory of Enchantment, https://theoryofenchantment.com/meet-the-founder

Simon Sinek, A Bit of Optimism podcast, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jckSBkw8_7k

Lee Wolak, The Power of Empathy, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGmeumDv494

Mark Levine, Identity and Emergency Intervention: How Social Group Membership and Inclusiveness of Group Boundaries Shape Helping Behavior, Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin 31(4):443-53, May 2005

In my pursuit to answer the question what is genuine human connection, I’ve also asked what is ‘disconnection’ and what is ‘disingenuous.’  Today, I explore genuine connection that is ‘not human.’  

Man’s best friend.  

We all know what I am talking about.  

I am not talking about honoring thy mother and thy father, nor am I talking about brotherly love. Because Man’s best friend isn’t even another human being. The being we identify with as filling the void of our loneliness so completely isn’t even of our own species.

SOURCES
Angela Garvin, This Morning, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wuflBb4sfg

Susan Little, The Human-Animal Bond, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjxAewIBYJk

Crystal Dilworth, Do We Love Dogs As Much As Babies?, DNews, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3k5H76KTnQ8

Julian Huguet, Why We Love Dogs More Than Humans, DNews, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJZxsm6EwLc

Clive Wynne, ASU KEDtalk: Why are dogs special?, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbKlFjvbb4Y

Chris Ulmer, Living with Williams Syndrome (A Condition that Makes You Friendly), https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxZ7aZMFHPE

Scientific Magazine, What Makes Dogs so Friendly? Study finds genetic link to super out-going people, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5CIBg3qDDM

Kim Brophey, The Problem with Treating a Dog Like a Pet, Kim Brophey, TEDxUNCAsheville, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46ND3suK1y8

Amrat Hiranya, Train the Owner, Not the Dog, Amrut Dog Guru Hiranya, TEDxDSCE, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bh4SzcWcRRY

Mark Twain Quote by Scott Leffler, scottleffler.com

MUSIC
Freedom Trail Studio, “Dwarf Star”
Aakash Gandhi, “Invisible Beauty”
Wagner, “Bridal Chorus from Lohengrin,” London Symphony Orchestra
Cat Stevens, “I Love My Dog”

On this episode of Genuine Human Connection, I speak with a former client of mine about his experiences discovering a cancerous tumor in his bladder.  

Ed Tilschner and his wife first met with me 2019.  As our social circles and mutual interests overlapped, we started to socialize more, and I discontinued my professional relationship with them.  Even through the pandemic, we have stayed in touch.  In February, I learned Ed had developed a cancerous tumor.  He said he wanted to share his experience with my audience.  So, days after emergency surgery to remove the tumor, we talked about cancer, fear, community, and human connection.