Going There with Jen

Sometimes you just need a winding conversation…one with really no start and end (other than we only had an hour scheduled).Throw in Rachael Rice and you have one magical, radical, whimsical, intriguing, inspiring, and challenging conversationWE COVER THE GAMUT…LITERALLY…LIKE CRADLE TO GRAVE.We start off talking about art and snowflakes and how BAD I am at art and we throw in some exotic marshmallow making and then Rachael agrees to be my surrogate crafty mom…WHA?!?!?!?!?!(Little does she know I fully plan on taking her up on this when I’m trying to think of a crafty project with my daughter).We end up talking about our abusive dads and how it impacts our parenting (and truthfully, scares us), why we think people should be judged, cultural appropriation and how it relates to/impacts Rachael’s artwork, disability advocacy and the importance of evolving our language, sitting in the uncomfortable, her work as a death doula (this stuff is f a s c i n a t i n g), and our anesthetized culture which OF COURSE has people eating Tide Pods.Listen in, take notes, ask yourself (and others) some hard questions and come say HI to RACHAEL and ME on Insta to continue the conversation.FAVORITE MOMENTSTo see boho-laced dreamcatchers manufactured overseas so that I can make money…? Fuck that. No way…that’s not why I’m on this planet.Can white people just unplug from the internet for a minute and let the non-dominant folks have the floor….throw them some money and just say, “Thanks.”?I’m trying to direct my rage….I’ve appropriated the anger of oppressed folks and I need to remember…what’s mine?There’s ableism in demanding everyone to memorize and learn concepts our culture doesn’t actually educate us on…at all!It’s staggering the amount of care taken to protect children from the reality of the world…the way that life is.Death for me, crosses the level of comfortability in the uncomfortable and I think it’s because I’ve wanted my dad dead for most of my life and that makes me feel like a shitty person.Parts of us are meant to be broken – that brokenness is part of how we know ourselves to be human.PEOPLE + RESOURCES MENTIONEDIllana Burk of YOUR LIFE’S WORKSHOPThe END of Rachael’s DreamCatcher careerRachael’s conversation with Carmen Spagnola of NUMINOUS PODCASTRachael’s writings about the WHITE LADY FINDING HERSELF (NOTE: Rachael and I both identify as WHILFTS).MEET RACHAELI am a full-time artist, writer, and educator. My work lies at the crossroads of creative expression, community, justice, teaching, healing and magic.My background is in critical pedagogy + constructivist theory where I specialized in differentiated instruction and educating for democracy with concentrations in Art and English.I have spent over 20 years in the classroom as a certified, licensed public school art teacher, as well as in after-school and out-of-school community-based arts programs that serve primarily at-risk youth, folks with disabilities and low-income communities.In a subsequent professional iteration, I spent some years in the social enterprise non-profit startup world where I worked to implement systems to support communities where our current systems have failed. This included things like innovative repurposing of industrial surplus, outreach, development + fundraising, and starting alternative + complementary currency supported approaches to health care.Learn more about Rachael at WWW.RACHAELRICE.COM.WEBSITE ∆ INSTAGRAM ∆ PATREON ∆ FACEBOOK ∆ ETSYSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mason didn’t think they’d live to their late 20s and is now 32 with a wife, baby, and super important work helping organizations be more LGBTQ friendly.We want…scratch that…NEED Mason here on this planet at this critical time as we all learn how to better navigate how society is changing.Listen in as Mason and I talk about self-harming (they were hospitalized 7 times), having to adopt your own daughter because of the fucked up conventions in our society, the support of amazing parents, being excommunicated from church (YAY Conservative Christians!!), and the wholesomeness of skipping rocks when ragey angry (as opposed to throwing milk crates which is what I was want to do in my younger days…).This episode is absolutely PACKED and has me laughing, tearing up, getting mad, feeling hopeful, intrigued…and everything in between.Have a listen and then come say Hi on Insta and let Mason (@masonaid) know how much you loved their stories and any takeaways you have from the conversation.(We even weave in talk of erotica because how can you not?????)People + Resources MentionedMason’s website: Mason AidMason’s MUST WATCH video What Do You Need to Come Out AboutChristian ska band Five Iron FrenzyBari Tessler Linden’s Art of MoneyYNABMeet MasonMason Aid is an LGBTQ educator and advocate focused on helping business owners be LGBTQ inclusive in their language and processes. They grew up on a small farm in rural Northeast Missouri and have since moved to the teeming metropolis of Columbia, Missouri.They got their start working with LGBTQ teens and found passion through this work. Seeing the experiences and lives of these amazing youth had a profound impact on Mason, and through their volunteer work they found opportunities training educators and social service providers. They have since grown those opportunities into a business working with HR departments and creative entrepreneurs to help others avoid the “accidental asshole” moment.Mason loves spending time with their wife and baby, going on walks, cooking good food, and being a pretentious coffee snob.Website ∆ Instagram ∆ TwitterSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

GAH. Life’s a journey…yeah? Firstly…YEAH, IT’S SEASON 2, BABY!!!!!GOING THERE is an absolute labor of love and I pinch myself daily over the interesting people I meet and the deep conversations we have.A GINORMOUS Thank You for joining along on this ride.Now…onto the episode… WHAT’S IN THIS EPISODE Today, the tables have turned and the interviewer has become the interviewee. My friend and former guest, Dyana, asks me the hard questions that demand hard answers. What I had assumed was going to be a discussion about my childhood turned into something so much more.I’ve never been one for commitment and monogamy and kids and…and…and…yet here I am happily (and monogamously) married with three lovely children.Only…I wasn’t always so happily married to my husband. In fact, 3 years ago I told him I wanted a divorce and even got my own apartment and started furnishing it. I loved him, deeply and tremendously, but I was done being in a relationship that neither of us was choosing to nurture.But now? After 16 years I think we’ve finally figured it out which looks a whole lot like me listening to my heart rather than my ego, both of us putting in the hard emotional labor to better communicate and articulate our needs, and having an ongoing list of things to discuss with our amazing marriage therapist. And oh yeah…a new house…but more on that in the episode.I don’t want to spill everything but this is a really raw + vulnerable conversation about a woman (me) growing up and learning how to set aside her enormous ego, compromise, grow into a nurturing woman, and learn how to be a better person.Listen in as Dyana Valentine (SEASON ONE GUEST) turns the tables on me and asks me the hard questions. Oooh boy…this stuff can be hard, yo! SOME OF MY FAVE MOMENTS IN THIS CONVERSATION INCLUDE: My optimism that maybe we could remarry when we’re 70. Yeah…hubby didn’t go for that idea.How I went from never feeling like anyone had my back to the realization that my husband’s had my back all along…I just wasn’t ready to allow for it. (Side-note: this man is a saint for sticking by my side after all I’ve put him through.)How a home saved our marriage (I’m not being funny…I mean this quite sincerely) and why creaky wood floors help me feel safe and loved.How this same home and my marriage has given me roots…roots I never wanted but help me feel more independent and free…two feelings I never thought I could find within a marriage and a family.The guilt I have that my older kids – my boys – didn’t have a happy and fulfilled mom and that my daughter now mostly does. They were robbed and I feel bad about that.Giving birth to my daughter and asking myself if I was the type of woman I’d want raising her and the answer was no…and that was hard to hear. I mean..SHIT. Now what?Questioning if I can trust my gut when that’s been my stalwart and lifeline all these years…talk about shaking your ego to its core!A HUGE thank you to Dyana for turning the tables on me and hats off to all MY GUESTS that show up and spill the beans on their own personal stories∆ JenSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I've been in the dumps since the holidays - sickness, a little family drama that I created on Christmas Eve and oh yeah...my dad verbally abusing my brother, his wife, and my husband. I have him blocked so yeah...fun times folks, fun times.What I've learned through my (many) years is that the darkness will eventually fade/pass. Sometimes it takes a day or two and sometimes twenty but at least it doesn't take years like it used to.I'm being serious here.Anyoo..this is me - unscripted, off the cuff, in the buff, raw, sniffs, ums, and all.Enjoy <3...and come say HI at [email protected] and/or Insta @jenvertanen.To our grit + grace + and resilience, Jen xoSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Alex and I haven't talked in FORever so it was lovely to catch up on all things life including depression, anxiety, one-star Yelp reviews, isolating, and erotica...all wrapped up in our goofy sense of humor and willingness to go there.What I love so much about Alex is what she shares through her writing is both uplifting AND intensely real. She practices vulnerability which such a sense of humor and delight and makes the world a better, kinder place one word/article/book at a time.Alex recently published her new book, You're Going to Survive, which is alllll about stories of people who have survived the ups and downs and pitfalls of life and it all started with a single gut-punching one-star Yelp review of her honey's new restaurant. What ensued was intense emotional fallout, a rattled sense of purpose and identity, and a discovery that she couldn't do this alone. Alex did the smart thing—she reached out to her support network, even when her inclination was to isolate. What she found in the arms of those who love her most is that everyone has experienced their version of a one-star Yelp review. Can I get an AMEN?!With her courage rallied, mind inspired, and heart still stinging, Alex turned these experiences of adversity (and more!) into an incredible new book.Listen in this week as Alex and I talk all about how difficult life can be sometimes. We open up about opening up and share the places that are hardest to talk about.It’s the last episode of the season, and what a journey it has been! A ginormous THANK YOU for joining me on this wild ride. Listen in to hear Alex and I talk about: The inspiration behind Alex’s newest book, and its mission to bring the light through the darkness.Why sharing our rock bottom moments can help others feel not alone.Isolating is SUCH a struggle for so many of us. How do we know when we are isolating for the right reasons?Alex’s struggle with hidden anxiety and what she's doing about it.Triumphs, embarrassments, and the moments where we truly live. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I usually cover a lot of heavy stuff in this show, but as always my main goal is to bring out the light in any dark situation. Today, let’s just stand in the light for a little bit; let’s laugh for therapy's sake and roll with whatever crazy, zany hijinks the universe wants to throw at us. This episode is all about why finding the light in the dark is essential to our personal well-being. It’s time to talk comedy. Humor is healing. This is the anthem of my guest Susan Stewart. Susan is a Toronto-based comedian and speaker who has walked her path of darkness but has come out laughing. Susan will be the first to tell you that even the most uncomfortable or unfortunate circumstances can become humorous with time. The real, deep, heavy topics that most folks want to skirt around are her comedy bread and butter. I love that she plays so lightheartedly with the duality of comedy and tragedy. What she creates with her stories is something truly beautiful and truly human.In this episode, Susan and I commiserate about so many things including how hard it can be to parent our children sometimes, struggles with mental health, and the strength of the communities that rally around us.Above all else, we will celebrate the fact that the darkness has not won. Light wills out and life finds a way. You ready to laugh? Listen in to hear Susan and I talk about: Feeling amazing on the outside (thanks to the Crisis Diet) but falling apart on the inside.Why humor is such an important component in telling our truths.Standup comedy, mental health, and the ability to stop blaming external circumstances.Susan's windy path back to humor by way of working for the government.Misadventures in parenting and Susan's hilarious re-enactment of her partner's daughter.What prompted Susan to write a book. HINT: It's not what I was expecting!How Susan helped me name who I wanted to be based on what I liked to do as a child..I'm a dabbler! And I LOVE that about myself.Susan’s advice for those who might be struggling and feeling alone. Resources + People mentioned Emelia Symington Fedy's (Going There guest) course, Necessary Creatives   More From Susan Susan Stewart is a comedian, author, and professional speaker who has spent the last 15 years entertaining and inspiring people to see the lighter side of life. Susan is the author of Reaching The Laugh Resort, Your New Lenses Are Ready For Pick Up: A Guide To Seeing The Lighter Side Of Life, You Gotta Laugh: Wit And Wisdom About Not Taking Life (Or Yourself) Too Seriously. You can learn more about Susan at susanstewart.ca.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

“Life is fascinating; people are even more so.” My friend Laura Egland couldn’t have started this podcast with anything more fitting. As I record this interview, Laura and I are sitting in her cozy home in Fargo, North Dakota.Life is happening right here, right now including some rambunctious mews and hijinks from Laura’s new kitty. Since I am allll about life being real, sometimes it’s really messy and filled with a bit of kitten noise!Laura and I are two peas in a pod. We’ve only been together in-person twice in the past five years, but it feels like I’ve been her friend for life. We had a lot of fun talking about just anything: from embarrassing stories, using humor and self-deprecation as a defense mechanism, and the heartbreaking moments that have shaped us. Laura literally holds nothing back. With unflinching humor, real-life details, and unmatched honesty, Laura shares so much with us today.I know you are going to love her wild story of having her car repossessed on her birthday…while she was masturbating! She also shares how growing up was hard, but life is now better than she could have ever imagined. We talk about limiting beliefs about money, and how we can define what it means to be wealthy.Storytelling is a bit of a lost art and Laura is both preserving that through her project, “The Tell” AND keeping the spirit alive on this show.I hope you feel encouraged to share your most embarrassing, messiest, wildest tales with a good friend..or even ME! Listen in to hear Laura and I talk about: Laura’s incredible story of having her car repossessed on her birthday...while masturbating.How Laura created a community of storytellers that she didn’t even know she needed.Struggling to answer “Is it OK to be funny?” especially in these incredibly trying times.How our childhood informs and shapes up way more than we realize...and learning to find the good qualities in our less than stellar parents (i.e. imperfect human beings).Our egos. End of sentence, period.Becoming a mother young, handling relationships, and making choices to improve and grow evenwhen it's hard. Resources + People mentioned Hitachi Magic Wand (per Laura, do NOT get a knock-off)Laura's storytelling venture, The Tell (modeled after The Moth)My story (of the cat in my freezer) at Laura's The Tell (it's hilarious...promise!) More of Laura An incorrigible user of humor in all situations (appropriate or not), Laura Egland has worn many hats in her life, and is now in the midst of the metaphorical shit-pile, gleefully working on examining and casting aside all of the things she assumed (and assumed others assumed) about herself.On the home front, Laura lives in Fargo, ND with her wonderful fiancé, and two cats who are obvious stand-ins for her now-adult son living in Atlanta. A large extended family comprised of folks with whom she shares no DNA, and a few with whom she does wraps up what Laura refers to as “quite the charmed life if I stop whining long enough.”When not working at her accounting job, Laura focuses on fostering community via a storytelling event she founded—the Tell—now in its sixth season; treating herself *when she remembers* with grace; consuming copious amounts of coffee and cheese; willingly discussing her own mental illness struggles; blogging in her head (and eventually to an actual site!); and ignoring the dust bunnies in her house.Laura’s life-goal is to be a stay-at-home Kitty Mom who also gets to spend her time supporting her community while blogging and podcasting for fun. She fully intends to always ignore the dust bunnies.Facebook ∆ // InstagramSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Opening up to others is one of the hardest things to do. When we do practice vulnerability, what happens is an authentic connection with another human being that is wonderfully sweet. But...knowing the rewards of honesty is still not enough sometimes for us to break the ice. It’s helpful when there is someone else to pave the way and that’s one of the many reasons why I love Ashley Beaudin.I reached out to Ashley early on in the formation of this podcast, and I’ve been excited to have her on the show since. Ashley is passionate about online community building, and she knows that it all starts with honesty + bravery.Ashley's signature movement, Imperfect Boss, helps to normalize imperfection in all things. Nobody’s perfect, and Ashley’s doesn’t just acknowledge imperfections...she embraces them.Among her many passions are donuts, meeting people, and changing lives. Get to know the real Ashley with me today as we break apart a recent Instagram post that is radically honest and incredibly real. We cover topics like her childhood, body image, sex addictions, and receiving government assistance.Ashley’s story has a little bit for everyone, and I am inspired and in awe by her bravery in the face of adversity.Shall we? Listen in to hear Ashley and I talk about: Our favorite donuts. Ashley's is a sour cream glaze while mine is anything maple bacon.Ashley’s recent Instagram post (she was on a mission to disrupt shame) and 5 of her super honest imperfections - a sexting addiction and never been kissed are just 2 of them!Feeling uncertain in your own body and the impact of your parents growing up - from feeling rejected to lacking basic self-care.How Ashley has struggled with her sexting addiction and intimate relationships.How faith and church culture impacted Ashley’s ability to grow. Battling shame and fear when going on financial assistance. Why Ashley ended up having 12 teeth pulled at a men’s homeless shelter. Resources + People mentioned The Imperfect Boss website and Instagram - check out Ashley's upcoming Imperfect Boss camp! I want to go so bad!!!!! More of Ashley Inspirational speaker and movement maker, Ashley Beaudin is the visionary behind #theimperfectboss; a movement that is inspiring tens of thousands of creative women to become real and confident in life and business.Ashley is known for her passionate, authentic and dynamic voice. Her voice and work have been featured in publications and events such as Mind Body Green, Combining Passions, Wild Hearts Conference, Belong Magazine and many more.Website ∆ // Instagram ∆ // Twitter ∆ // PinterestSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dyana Valentine is a positively f a s c i n a t i n g  human being. I mean...this lady DREAMS for a living AND she's just a really really kind + generous person (she sent me a thank you card before I had a chance to send her a thank you for being a Going There guest).We spend some time talking about how she dreams for people but then we dive deep into Dyana's immense grief over the death of her father. As we were talking I found myself feeling jealous of Dyana's relationship with her dad. I mean...their relationship must have been so incredibly awesome for Dyana to be laid out flat on the floor by grief - barely able to function for months.But nope. Like most of us, Dyana's relationship with her father was incredibly complex and this professional intellectualizer was forced to learn she couldn't intellectualize her way out of grief.Heavy. Stuff. And lessons learned to last a lifetime. Listen in to hear Dyana and I talk about: Dyana's path to dreaming for others and how she processes the dreams...even for strangers. (<== fascinating!)Going through surprisingly debilitating grief when she lost her father and being unable to intellectualize it when you're literally a professional intellectualizer.Grieving when others don't provide the support you need when you were counting on them. Instead, it's "Hey - it's been a few months..you're good to go now, right?". Er..no. Just no.Career by trial and error. And lots of error. And lots of trial. And running out of money. Did I mention trial and error? Add that all in with debilitating grief and well...you do the math.Learning to ask the right questions...it's so much harder than we think.Defining relationships in terms that work for US. Meet Dyana Dyana Valentine is not for the faint of heart. She’s spent 13+ years teaching leaders to listen to themselves and complete seemingly impossible projects—we’re talking major brand overhauls, six-figure product launches, full-fledged manuscripts. She serves up straight-from-the-hip advice in online magazines and columns all over the ‘net. In a past life, she was an idiot-savant microsurgery tech, worked for the Olympic Games organizing committee, and was personally approached by the FBI with a recruitment invitation—for classified reasons.Website ∆ // Instagram ∆ // YoutubeSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Healing work is hard. And exhausting. And oh so worth it. You've heard me say that before and now today's guest, Thais Sky, is saying it as well.As women, we are strong and powerful creatures made even more powerful when tackling the tough wounds and I feel like no one understands that better than Thais.Thais is a straight-talking truthteller and I found myself nodding along vigorously as Thais dives right into healing traumas and the worthiness wound and even helps me redefine the word "broken".We tackled just about every difficult topic you can imagine starting with Thais’ own journey to healing from binge eating and her feelings of unworthiness. We talk about finding God, why women struggle to feel worthy (I think we all know why...ahem...cough...patriarchy) and how we can join our sisters to fight systematic oppression.Also? Intersectionality, fear and doubt, the pitfalls of the self-help industry…the good stuff just keeps coming!  Listen in and let Thais' wisdom fill you with hope and strength and so much resilience. Because remember...YOU are a powerful creature.Listen in to hear Thais and I talk about:•Why Thais felt drawn to coach women and our unique psychological needs.  •The first time Thais prayed to God and the response she got.•How our wounds, traumas, addictions, etc can be our greatest source of power.•A candid conversation about binge eating, and the pivotal moments that allow us to heal.  •Why forcing 'readiness' rarely works.•The worthiness wound and the innate sense of not belonging.•Spiritual practices and habits we use to build up our inner worth.•Dismantling the systems that oppress us from within.Meet Thais Sky: Two parts sass, one part straight up truth talk. Thais is an international speaker, writer, women’s leadership coach and feminist on a heart-led mission to support the seekers, the visionaries, and the "why the heck do I feel so broken” of the world reclaim their worthiness by learning how to explore, trust and express themselves unapologetically. She also hosts a weekly podcast RECLAIM where she hosts conversations on finding the intersection of feminism and spirituality. She received a prestigious first-class degree in Management and has studied spiritual psychology, yoga, and leadership for over 10 years. Washingtonian Magazine named her as one of the top “8 bloggers to know.” The Huffington Post calls her “an inspirational woman” and she was nominated for Forbes Magazine 30 under 30 award.You can learn more about Thais and her online offerings at iamthaissky.com and just about everywhere on social media because #millennial at @IamThaisSky.Thais' InstagramThais' FacebookSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.