Good Night

Something unusual is going on in your head. There's a famous Hypnosis experiment in this podcast, and it will amaze you. The results of this experiment opens up the question of how many parts of you play important roles in your life. And...there's a story about having dinner with your Ex that might hit home. Give a listen please.

When you're so uptight you're out of control, that's called BURNOUT! Burnout is stress that keeps repeating itself, over and over and over again. It probably started when you were a kid and you wanted to bang your fork against your glass, shove your peas into your pocket and sing Greensleves at the table. Know why you can't do that? "BECAUSE I SAID SO." (That's a voice from your past.) Why are there lots of drinking songs, but no eating dinner songs? Give a listen to this podcast. You'll find a way around this problem.

I just made it. I am sitting here in my big, comfortable, manly, black leather poppa chair in my living room, and that is very fortunate... because when I was standing in the middle of the room a few minutes ago, something in my right knee was suddenly...displeased. My right knee said something that sounded distinctly like..."Click" And it became immediatly obvious that it was up to my left knee to get me over here...which it did. Maybe I'll change my name to skippy if I keep hopping around on one leg like that.

It seems like everything is clicking for me these days. My knees, my elbows even my neck. This time I heard somebody who sounded a little like me make a very old man sound as he dropped into this sitting position. (drop) What all of a sudden happened to the kid who'se lived inside me all these years?

Big Louie, the hero of my book staying happy healthy and hot... available at amazon dot com...shameless plug...Big Louie has lots of statements for dealing with this situation. He says, you're not old till you go to your favorite diner and order a three miute egg, and they insist that you pay for it up front. He also says "remember that it's when you're over the hill that you pickup speed." He claims that there are plenty of people who want to celebrate their 90th birthday. I figure most of them probably are now 89. My favorite Big Louie quote is, "If you still have any moving parts left, for cryin out loud... move em." But I also like, "life is short. So smile while you still have teeth. Please give this podcast a listen.

My pilot buddy Eric's romance has just crashed. And he says he's in a never ending depression...forgetting everything Big Louie has always said...even "You can never tell when something wonderful is going to happen." I've got to get him to turn his Christal balls around...get him to get focused on a possible...if not totally probable...future. His problem isn't pandemic related...but it could be.

Irony is not the opposite of wrinkly .Wrinkly is not something I looked forward to getting. But this podcast claims wrinkles don't hurt. What do you think? Please let me know at [email protected].

This podcast is about sex and relationships. What do I know about sex, and relationships? I'm not a doctor. Not even a Phd kind of doctor. I'm not an expert...but that was exactly my point. I've made the same damn dumb mistakes most of you have made. And I'll make more of them. I've kept track of some of mine to help us...you and me...avoid making some of them again.

I keep trying to understand why we keep punishing ourselves with guilt and even loneliness... why some of us never get to share all the love we were born to give...and to get.

I got into a lot of trouble at some of the radio stations I worked at for putting those lovin touch stories on the air. You want to know why I did it? No? Well let me tell you anyway. Some of the guys I worked with were good at using radio to make "Theater of the mind"...Wolfman Jack, Don Imus, Cousin Bruce Morrow...but I wanted to take it one step beyond that. I wanted to make radio "Theater of the heart."

This Saturday is National Condom day. It's sponsored by the Trojan Condom company. That's an interesting name for a condom company. Trojan. It reminds me of the famous trojan horse...which managed to sneak into a closed up castle...that Trojan horse made it possible for a bunch of guys to have a very sexy day.

National Condom day is this Saturday. Can you imagine the parade with all those floats? Unfortunately, lots of women will only fake celebrating National Condom day. My Lady Wonder Wench says lots of women fake orgasms because lots of guys fake foreplay. Probably the most famous one liner about orgasams is attributed to Milton Berle. He supposedly said, "Two guys are talking...and one of them askes the other...'do you and your wife have mutual climax?' And the other guy says, 'no we have Prudential." Badda Bumm. Just calling that 7th day of the week Saturday is giving praise to a pagan god, by the way. And as you know, pagans were pretty sexy. In fact all the days of the week are named after sexy pagan gods.

Listen to this podcast and you'll find out to whom you are praying when you say the names of the days of the week.

Some stories are sexier than others. This podcast is about Mr. Story Man's stories. They're sexy. So sexy that my Lady Wonder Wench lets him un-dress her for bed every night so she can enjoy another of his sexy stories. And I don't mind a bit. Give a listen so you can understand why I don't mind.

What are your biggest memories? Please send them to me at [email protected] We'll use some in next week's podcast.

In our constant struggle to save the world, and keep Victoria's Secret from falling into the wrong hands...the ones with the cold fingertips, this podcast encourages you to launch your whistle missile...and it explains how to do that. So pucker up.