GUARDIAN ANGEL

No thoughts, just sports. I've unleashed my inner cheerleader and it feels good to purge the rage again. Clear eyes! Full hearts! Can't lose!

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(00:00:00) Smooth Brain Content: Sports, AR, Magic Eye

(00:11:00) Understanding Jock Mia

(00:16:11) We’re Voting YES

(00:23:01) Brand Spons Wishlist: LoBros, Heaps Normal, Barry Non-Alc, Fishbowl

(00:25:18) Review: The Footy Festival & Parade

(00:36:26) Review: Listen Out Festival

(00:48:09) Review: The AFL Grand Final

(00:51:07) Review: The NRL Grand Final

(00:52:08) Shoutout Video Steezy

(00:52:27) Weird News Report: Emotional Support Alligator, Marsupial Awareness, Allens Lollies Rebrands & Redundancies

It’s a weeb kind of week with the Barry Drop, the Baz Lenka Cotton On Collab and the JPEGMAFIA show at The Forum. Big in Japan or Big into Japan? We review the latest romcom releases: ‘When a Wild Fox Girl Meets a Push Pull Boy’ (Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce), the sequel ‘When a Panda Dunks Girl Meets a Samba Boy’ (Gabriette and Matty Healy), and the third instalment ‘When a Magpie Girl Meets a Lions Boy’ (Mia and Harry).

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(00:00:00) Long Weekend Agenda: Fuck Up Nights @ Hexpo, Grand Final Weekend, Listen Out

(00:03:11) Dictionary: Menty B, Cozzie Livs, Delulu, Rizz, Throwing Ropes, Broe

(00:05:03) The Kid Laroi Maccas McCrispy Launch

(00:06:00) Dating Updates: Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce, Gabriette and Matty Healy

(00:09:48) Usher @ The Superbowl, Taylor Swift @ Coachella

(00:11:43) Starter Pack Trend Analysis: Sporty & Rich, Push Pull, Wildfox, Mr. Winston, Tradie Briefs, JD Sportswear, Panda Dunks, Nike 270s, adidas Sambas, Prime Drinks, Poppy Lissiman Bags

(00:18:47) Cotton On: The Next Bonds?

(00:21:06) Baz Lenka Cotton On Collab, Barry Drink Drop, Predicting Bailey Smith’s Post-Y2K Look

(00:26:34) Nostalgia VS Futuristic Fashion Trends: Modern Elegance, Dystopian Minimalism, Millenniumcore

(00:27:51) Review: JPEGMAFIA @ The Forum

(00:38:15) Footy Chat: Brownlow Red Carpet Roast, Barry Seeding, Bailey Smith Cotton On In-store Appearance

(00:40:38) When a Magpie Girl Meets a Lions Boy: Mia and Harry’s Grand Final Divide

Harry makes his fortune in Jetstar bucks after a post-Bigsound flight cancellation in Brisbane and indulges in a taste test of astronaut broccoli before Eagle Rocking his way into the Qantas Lounge to assess the complimentary menu of unsalted snacks and big milk jugs. Meanwhile, back in Melbourne, I’ve caught finals fever and have broken up with my childhood footy team to scope out some new boys to shower in adoration. I’ve bypassed my family lineage of Hawthorn supporters and I’m doing the big dance with Collingwood, Carlton and Richmond. Who will win my heart? As we await the results of the grand gesture finals, Harry and I hypothesise about our upcoming adventures at Listen Out Festival and SXSW Sydney.

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(00:00:00) Harry’s BIGSOUND Recap

(00:07:53) We’re Heading To SXSW Sydney

(00:18:20) Melbourne Spring Fashion: Edi Gardens Runway, Birkenstocks Epidemic, Swooping Season Protection

(00:23:26) We’ll See You At Listen Out

(00:27:21) Finals Fever: Harry’s Kings aka The Brisbane Lions

(00:30:04) Finals Fever: Mia’s Breaking Up With The Bombers & Rejecting Her Family’s Hawks

(00:34:36) The Tipping Point: Mia Onground @ The MCG

(00:44:00) Mia’s Big Dance: The Blues, The Magpies, The Tigers

(00:46:15) Harry Onground @ Brisbane Airport (With His Jetstar Bucks Inheritance)

(00:52:26) Harry Onground @ The Qantas Lounge

(01:00:20) Finals Fever: North Melbourne Corporate Box, Growing Up In Richmond In The Year Of The Tiger, The Baggers Betrayal, Collingwood Bad Boy Kink

(01:08:51) The Angelfired Dictionary: Gravel Palette, Super Tasters, Mumblelina, Digital Dacking

After being catfished by a helveticacore bistro and suffering from dehydration at a vibeless pizzeria, we went full Seinfeld & Costanza on fine dining and its “fine” dining. Yada Yada Yada! We misplaced the red reading glasses required for ABC viewing, so we made our own Gruen Transfer assessments of primal celebrity fetishism in the perfume industry and the anti-ageism rhetoric in youth-relevant brand campaigns. 

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(00:00:00) Status Updates: A Dexie A Day, Mia’s Author Era, Harry’s Bigsound Trip

(00:06:57) Being Catfished By Helveticacore Bistros & Fontcore Establishments

(00:43:04) Gruen Transfer Cosplay: Fragrance Marketing ft. Adam Driver For Burberry, Hunter Schafer For Mugler, Robert Pattinson For Dior Homme

(00:53:13) The Enhanced Games: Usain Bolt in TNs

(00:53:37) Folklore: Nessie, Yeti’s, What Happened To Those 3 Boons?

(00:57:15) Recap: Shark Tank & The Oodie Guy

(01:04:56) Legacy Celebs In Relevant Brand Lookbooks: Brian Cox For Kith, Pitching The OC Cast For Heaven

Meet me in the bathroom? Nah, meet me in the BACK ROOM! We’re revisiting house parties and promoter guest lists, MySpace bulletins and Tumblr scenesters, YouTube wormholes and Soundcloud sub-genres, streaming algorithms and Boiler Room cameos, status anxiety at the club to social anxiety of digging with the heads. Our new favs are a lot like our old ones. It’s hard not to simp over artists who were your salvation. You really had to be there. †

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(00:00:00) House Tour: From The Couch To The Dining Room

(00:02:24) Review: The Barbie Movie

(00:12:32) The Barbenheimer Effect

(00:18:31) Automation & Self-serve Checkouts

(00:20:51) Rat Girl Summer: Passing The Crown From Mia To Hugsy

(00:26:09) RIP Angus Cloud, RIP Euphoria

(00:27:57) The EDM Era: Deadmau5 & His Purrari, Bloody Beetroots, Skrillex, Dillon Francis, TEED, Bitcoin, NFTs

(00:32:25) The Bloghaus Era: Blogging, Interviewing Artists, Twitter DMs, Subgenres

(00:33:45) The Streaming Era: Post-MySpace & Virality

(00:35:35) Behind The Scene Girl: Meme Culture & Curating The Internet

(00:37:47) The Simpathiser Era: George Clanton Album Review, Glaive, The 1975, Salem, Olivia Rodrigo

(00:41:13) The Angelfired Origin Story: Early Internet Gremlins & Self-Publishing

(00:42:43) Hot Boys Taking Ugly Press Pics

(00:43:09) The Simpathiser Era: The Dare & Turtlenecked

(00:50:29) Nostalgia VS Now VS The Future

(00:55:13) The Diminishing Returns Of Selflessness & Opportunity Cost Of Optimisation

(00:58:52) This Is Not A Hustle Bro Pod

(01:01:27) The Simpathiser Era: Baba Stiltz Album Review, Johnny Thunders, Lou Reed, Ethel Cain, Tyler The Creator, Wedidit, Rockstar Skaters & Baker 3

(01:07:55) Personal Brands

(01:10:00) The Art Of Podcasting

(01:13:20) The Simpathiser Era: Back To Baba Stiltz & The Dare, Electronic Labels: Public Possession, Steel City Dance Discs, Pelvis, Butter Sessions

It’s too easy to post wholesome family trip content online, but what really goes down on the tour bus? Jae returns to the pod to air out some post-travel demons after our recent holiday in the Philippines. We love our bread, we love our butter, we love our vapes and each other. Tap in as the Besorio sisters shed some light on navigating family dynamics and personal space, the gaslighting that comes with addiction and indulging in relaxation when you don’t need it.

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(00:00:00) Managing Addiction: Mia VS Vapes

(00:09:13) Unpacking Our Family Trip To The Philippines

(00:10:58) Sibling Hierarchy: Eldest VS Middle Child VS Baby

(00:15:02) Madamba Family Memorial For Tita Bing

(00:21:00) Spirituality & Aswang Folklore

(00:27:52) Filipinoisms & Chaos As A Baseline

(00:33:21) 3 Siblings VS 2 Siblings VS Only Child

(00:39:43) Eldest Sibling Trope & Running Away From The Family

(00:42:45) Youngest Sibling Trope & Yearning For Stability

(00:46:14) Stealing The Sharehouse Orange Juice & Parents Alchohol Stash

(00:47:47) Filipinoisms: Nappy Dogs, Short King Syndrome, Massage Chair Rooms

(00:52:06) On The Road: The Mountains, The Farm, Boracay, Manila

(01:07:31) Ethnic Family Feasts & The Return Of The Sugar Monster

(01:13:13) Let The Menty B’s Begin: Personal Space, Bouncing Back To Adulting After Travelling

(01:23:32) The Void & Questioning Your Life Goals

I returned from the Motherland and fell into the void. I’ve since escaped thanks to Harry’s light, fresh after his first AAA Splendour In The Grass experience. Despite being "Sober Kings" we aren’t quite raw dogging life and undertake a therapy session about the many vices that keep us impure.

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(00:00:00) Vapes Are Demon Nectar

(00:04:23) Therapy Sesh: Locating The Void (And Ways To Escape It)

(00:07:52) ADHDisms

(00:15:12) Travelling Throws You Off Your Pivot

(00:17:20) Sobriety Vices VS Raw Dogging Life

(00:20:41) AAA Recap: Splendour In The Grass

(00:36:28) Industry Secrets: The SITG Tackle Shack Afterparty

(00:38:56) Travis Scott VS Post Malone Albums

(00:40:50) Film Talk: Barbie VS Oppenheimer, Lena Dunham X Polly Pocket, SAG-AFTRA Strike

(00:45:05) Bad Boy Era Updates: Troye Sivan, Elias Bender Rønnenfelt, Matty Healy, Bret Easton Ellis, Vampires Etc

(00:46:16) Salem Live Show Presented By Pornhub

(00:47:30) Harry’s Goodest Boy Haircut And Mia’s Self-Inflicted Mushroom Do

(00:49:32) Twitter Rebrands As ‘X’ And Threads Is Flooded With Narcs

Our source codes are now sauce hoes, lost in their likeness sold as starter pack identities to the masses. The gentrification of the gentrified! Is it the human condition to destroy art in favour of commerce or are we simply inhumane?

(00:00:00) The Angelfired Set Makeover

(00:00:54) Big Spoon VS Lil Spoon

(00:06:08) What’s The Deal With Sleeping Habits?

(00:11:51) My Late Awakening To Vampire Academy And True Blood

(00:13:42) Unpacking Olivia Rodrigo’s ‘Vampire’

(00:19:06) The Intellectualisation Of The Pop Machine

(00:23:43) Taylor Swift Down Under

(00:25:46) Matty Healy’s Bad Behaviour

(00:44:00) Curfew Talk: Lana Del Rey And Frank Ocean

(00:53:32) Unpacking Lil Uzi Vert’s ‘Pink Tape’

Post-nut clarity has unleashed the truth serum: The Idol is mid. Moodboard-captioncore-aesthetic excellence may be in check but the plot holes are deeper than an indie softboi quoting Baudelaire. This is not the pod to leave a stone unturned, so we do our very best to dig through the vapour and find meaning beyond the hottie with the hairbrush.

Pearl clutchers beware! The Idol is good. Don’t come for us. Cum for the show instead. If you’re still reading, we also review the Iceage, Varg2™, Kahukx and New Wave live shows and spotlight wedding-bouquet-catching Jae and resident Coles slut Curtis Stone.

[ TOPICS ]

(00:00:00) Review: The Idol (So Far, So Good)
(00:22:45) Review: Iceage Live @ The Forum
(00:32:30) A Chance Encounter With Iceage
(00:39:05) Review: Varg2™ Live @ Misc
(00:43:34) Review: Kahukx And New Wave Live @ Laundry
(00:45:23) Jae Caught A Wedding Bouquet
(00:48:07) Curtis Stone Is A Coles Slut