Listeners, we did NOT solve it! But that’s ok! I’ve decided that it’s more important to be a mature grown-up and not worry about why I wasn’t invited to the company picnic. Maybe Mabel will have a fun time by herself hanging with Beef from the weirdness and everyone else who was invited! Oh well! If we happen to solve this week’s mystery today, that would be fine, I guess! It would make my life a lot better but it’s ok if it doesn’t happen! I’M A MATURE GROWN-UP NOW!!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Jimmy, Private Eye, here, letting all my listeners know that there’s a mystery a-foot, and me and my super-spy friend Mabel are here to solve it! The groundhog is about to wake from its Big Sleep, so we’ve only got a few minutes to look for a Clue as to why I haven’t been invited to tomorrow’s company picnic (where we’ll eat with our Knives Out)...these are all mystery films if that wasn’t clear, I’m doing a noir thing! Hope we solve it!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Listeners, I don’t believe in new year’s resolutions, but I do believe in new DAY’s resolutions! And today, I’m resoluting to become more buff here at the GZM GYM (or, the gym on the studio lot) so that way people see that I’m a strong person who they should invite to company events! I’m gonna powerlift my way into being thought of by my peers!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Hey there listeners, this is Mabel! Jimmy is still pretty upset about not being invited to all the company events this week, so today we’re going to the annual “end of January company lacrosse game” to try to figure out why that would be! My dad’s the coach so it’ll be nice to see him! I sure hope he doesn’t get too intense about intramural sports like he always does!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Listeners, have you ever been ANGRY? If you have, then you and I have a lot in common! I found out that I wasn’t invited to several very cool company events and nothing will fix this! Ok, maybe meeting a new character named BASOR who helps us read all the birthdays and shout out requests might help a little!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Listeners, it’s your pal Jimmy! Mabel and I took a DNA test and it turns out: Mabel is 100% related to a bunch of famous people in the history of podcasting! I can’t wait to find out who MY ancestors are too!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Jimmy and Mabel, world record holders! We’re gonna take the elevator all the way to the top of GZM Tower to break the world record for “World’s Tallest Podcast” and possibly experience a Classic Humpty Dumpty Situation(™)!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Has your week been stressful? Let the famously smooth sounds of me (Jimmy) lull you into a sense of peaceful meditation. It’s ALL-NATURAL!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Hey there, everybody, this is Mabel! Jimmy and I are going to explore all the sounds we can make on the soundboard here at the GZM Studios, as long as the board doesn’t break for some reason (Jimmy tripping, hot beverages being poured on it, etc.). If it DOES break, I guess we could…make our own sounds? But that shouldn’t happen, so it won’t!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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Hello, listeners! It’s your viral host with the most, Jimmy! My song last week went off the charts (in more ways than one) and now Mabel’s gonna help me recreate that online success! I don’t feel bad at ALL that people were really mean about how bad my song was!

(Psst! It’s me, Jimmy! I realized the secret email may have been too secret! So here it is! [email protected] Ok, buh-bye!)

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