Listen up buckos my Kickstarter needs a WHOLE THOUSAND MORE DOLLARS plus a lil gas money for the WASTED TRIP I made to Lesbo Lauren's apartment, apparently lesbians and straight women can't help me so it is UP TO YOU, MEN, if you don't donate you're part of the problem!

Well look who came CRAWLING BACK for money now that he sees how well I'm doing it's Pro Life Peter and you BETTER keep donating so I can prove I don't need him, DO IT FOR FEMALE EMPOWERMENT GUYS this is NOT A BREAK UP!

Ally Ira better be on my side HE LET HIS FRAT BROS CANCEL MY SHOW and we STILL have to raise $3K

My Kickstarter is open for donations and if you don't give me money YOU ARE A STOOGE OF THE PATRIARCHY.

The patriarchy thinks they can cancel MY SHOW??? Not if #HannahsHoes have anything to say about it TWEET #SaveHairyLegsHannah NOT THAT I NEED SAVING I AM A FULL BUSHED B*TCH

Hair removal CAN BE FEMINIST, I can shave my lady stache and labia stache if I WANT TO, AND I'm a teacher now so everything I say is law bitches.

CLASSIC PATRIARCHY can't let me enjoy my newfound fame, my Bra Burners Bi-Weekly cover story JUST HIT and they leak my nudes and criticize my boyfriend YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT TO A MAN, no one wants to see male nudes.

Ranking women is SEXIST and MISOGYNISTIC and BEAUTY-IST and how DARE they leave me off the list, plus Shaven Legs Shawn isn't even a woman and Astounding Ashley isn't even a Social Justice Warrior YOU JUST WAIT TIL I CRASH THEIR PARTY.

I'M NOT APPROPRIATING ANYTHING, Lesbo Lauren GAVE me that song, this is just another example of pitting women against women and NOT IN A SEXUAL WAY, plus Shaven Legs Shawn appropriated straight culture in his song and NO ONE SAID ANYTHING ABOUT THAT!

You BET I tackled the gender pay gap those STOOGES OF THE PATRIARCHY are messing with my dollars, you screwed with the WRONG Feminist Tweeter/Social Justice Warrior/Future Woke Citizen of the Year! I won't let you OR my arch-rival's "fame" OR my sister's "baby" stop me from selflessly hosting this gala for millionaires!