Healing & Dealing

In this new episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast, Elizabeth Goncal joins me to share  her personal journey of self-discovery and healing. Her self-discovery started after college, but the root of the issue goes back to childhood, and they realize they need to heal through it. She delves into the internalized societal expectations and their impact on self-perception. She touches on her tendency to seek external validation and people-pleasing behaviors and her realization of abandoning her true self and the impact it had on her life. She recognizes the need to love and be with herself, overcoming the anxiety associated with being alone, and learning to provide self-love and validation.

Overall, this episode emphasizes the importance of self-love, authenticity, and breaking free from patterns of seeking external validation to live a more fulfilling and genuine life.

Key takeaways:

• Discovery of Coaching: After four months, Elizabeth stumbled upon a coach, leading her to realize that her struggles dated back to childhood, prompting her to embark on a healing journey.

• Abandoning the True Self: Elizabeth reflects on a moment when she looked at a childhood photo and cried, realizing how much she had abandoned her true self in relationships, seeking external validation.

• Recognizing the pattern of needing external validation not only in relationships but also in other aspects of life, including her business and the importance of noticing and addressing these patterns.

• The impact of societal pressures, especially from social media, where individuals feel compelled to conform to certain standards, affecting self-perception and behaviors.

• Elizabeth advocates for being gentle with oneself and cultivating self-compassion, highlighting the significance of changing self-talk and treating oneself with kindness.

• The challenges of maintaining authenticity in a society that often promotes conformity and external validation, urging individuals to embrace their true selves.

• Elizabeth emphasizes that patterns in relationships often overlap with patterns in other areas of life, such as work and business, underscoring the interconnectedness of personal development.

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

Welcome to another episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast. In today’s episode, Ashley Beeman joins me to talk about her journey from battling addiction and body image issues to achieving personal and professional success, and highlights the transformative power of mindset shifts and self-acceptance. She touches on the ADHD management, body dysmorphia, and the impact of multi-level marketing (MLM) culture on self-perception and the importance of balance, sustainable approaches to health, and the rejection of restrictive ideologies, whether in dieting or other aspects of life. Overall, the emphasis of this episode is on creating a positive, empowered mindset that extends to all aspects of life, including personal development, relationships, and overall well-being.

“I realized that in the anti-diet space, I had just as many rules as I did when I was in the diet culture space. And I remember crying to one of my friends on the phone being like, I just want to order a scale, but I'm not supposed to, I'm not supposed to want to change my body, I'm not supposed to want to do any of that. And she reminded me that, you know, this is your life, actually, you can do what you want. And that's when I started breaking all of the rules. And I found my happy little like, gray area, the magical gray area is what I like to call it. And I went on this journey of just trusting myself, trusting my decisions, and really coming from a space of love and not hate”- Ashley Beeman

Key highlights from this episode:

• Ashley shares her weight loss journey after becoming a mother, discussing the emotional toll, unhealthy practices, and struggles with addiction to Adderall. She emphasizes the turning point when she decided to heal her relationship with herself.

• The shift from the yo-yo diet culture to the anti-diet and body positivity space. While initially liberating, she later realized the presence of restrictive rules in this space as well.

• Breaking free from rigid rules, finding a balanced approach, and embracing the "magical gray area” and the importance of trust, self-love, and decision-making from a positive mindset.

• Discussion on ADHD, her coping mechanisms, and the importance of self-awareness and personalized strategies for managing daily tasks.

• Past struggles, including addiction, withdrawal from Adderall, and the commitment to share her story to help others.

• The conversation transitions to body dysmorphia, with Ashley defining it as perceiving one's body differently from reality. She shares her personal struggle,emphasizing the importance of deep work, self-love, and acceptance.

• The intensification of body dysmorphia to her involvement in multi-level marketing (MLM), where the focus on body transformations for business purposes contributed to negative body image.

• Mindset Shift, moving from detachment to embracing and appreciating her body for its capabilities and the experiences it allows.

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

In today’s episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast, Michelle Gordon joined me to talk about her journey as a happy nurse whose mission is to help women take control of their lives, step into their power and rediscover their passion and confidence. She also talks about her experience in overcoming burnout and achieving a healthier, more fulfilling life. She delves into the impact of burnout on physical and mental health and the importance of solitude and self-reflection, shifts in perspective, embracing emotions, and making lifestyle changes. Michelle's story highlights the transformative power of reconnecting with one's values, engaging in self-care, rebuilding relationships, and ultimately pursuing a career aligned with one's passions. This episode underscores the potential for positive change and growth even in the face of significant challenges.

“Being on my own was a very foreign thing for me, because I constantly had surrounded myself with lots of people. And I think I had done that looking back very deliberately because I was people-pleaser, I needed validation. And that meant having people around me. So being on my own really helps me start to untangle a lot of my thoughts and process a lot of those thoughts and then start to really connect back with my feelings.”- Michelle Gordon

Key highlights:

• Coping with burnout  by turning to alcohol as a means of escape, leading to a cycle of overworking, overcompensating, and people-pleasing.

• Seeking help from a life coach, shifting her perspective on life and taking back control over her destiny. 

• The healing process involved identifying and aligning with her core values, recognizing the importance of health, freedom, and family, which she had neglected while defined solely by her nursing identity.

• Through fitness, self-reflection, and reconnection with emotions, she regained mental clarity, leading to positive changes in her overall well-being.

• Michelle stopped using alcohol as a coping mechanism, faced the discomfort of feeling her emotions, and found solace in practices like weightlifting and beach walks. Her relationship with alcohol transformed, allowing her to enjoy a beer without the need for escapism.

• Learning to be present, savoring small moments, and appreciating the beauty around. This mindfulness contributed to her overall sense of joy and well-being.

• Michelle's personal experience enables her to empathize with others facing burnout, helping them navigate the challenges and rediscover a sense of self.

Connect with Michelle:

Email [email protected]

Website thehealthyhappynurse.com

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

Welcome to another episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast! Brittney Phillips joined me in this new episode to talk about navigating the complexities of a blended family, the conflicts and the challenges. She delves more into the dynamics of a blended family based on her own personal experiences. We discuss co-parenting relationships, parenting styles, dealing with past traumas, creating memories as a blended family, and the importance of working through challenges to strengthen relationships within the family. We talk about balancing time between the biological and the stepchildren, sometimes feeling guilty when prioritizing time with our biological son over our stepsons. This episode underscores the significance of acknowledging and addressing past traumas, adopting effective co-parenting strategies, and working collaboratively to create a positive and nurturing environment for all family members. Overall, the takeaway is a message of resilience, growth, and the possibility of building fulfilling family dynamics in the context of blended families.

“It's such a tricky position to be in to be the step parent. I think most of the time the stepmom is not trying to take over, they're just trying to be a person in their life. Right. And so having some understanding for that can be helpful. That's when we get in trouble is when we start to feel jealousy or like either way from the biological mom or from the stepmom. But what I recommend to my clients is like, let's get curious. Why are we feeling jealous? Are we feeling insecure? Like what's coming up for us? Because this actually isn't a problem over here. It's a problem here in my heart, in me that I need to deal with. So that's kind of the biggest suggestion I would make.” -Brittney Phillips

Key takeaways:

• Blended families come with unique challenges, including navigating different parenting styles, addressing past traumas, and fostering new relationships.

• Open and honest communication is crucial in addressing issues within blended families. 

• Effective co-parenting is essential. This involves collaboration between parents to ensure consistency in parenting styles, discipline, and decision-making for the well-being of the children.

• Recognizing and addressing past traumas, both for parents and children, is important for healing and building a healthy family environment.

• Creating a positive and nurturing environment is a shared responsibility. Family members can work together to cultivate an atmosphere where everyone feels supported and valued.

• The discussion touches on the feeling of guilt that can arise when trying to balance time between biological and stepchildren. The speaker shares personal experiences of feeling guilty when spending time with her biological son and highlights the need to overcome societal judgments

• The need to balance different parenting styles, address feelings of favoritism, and navigate the dynamics of having both biological and stepchildren.

• The challenge of stepchildren interpreting requests or discipline differently than biological children.

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

In this new episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast, I am joined by my long-time friend of mine, Portia Franklin. She shares her inspiring journey from being a mother at the age of 14 to empowering women by recounting her story. She talks about her journey through teenage pregnancy, educational struggles, and the complexities of single motherhood. She delves into the importance of a strong support system, continuous learning, and breaking free from toxic patterns. Additionally, there is a focus on Portia's entrepreneurial spirit, her commitment to her children, and her rediscovery of purpose through her passion for working with women and children. The story overall conveys themes of empowerment, healing, and the pursuit of a fulfilling life despite adverse circumstances.

“Maybe I hid my fears behind confidence, maybe I hid my insecurity behind confidence. Because I did have a lot of insecurities. I did have a lot of fears. But I always just showed up because I had to, I had no other choice but to show up and make things happen. Because if I wanted to have something I always had to do it myself, you know, and my mom did her very best, but she taught me and she showed me what hard work was and she showed me that you just get it done, you just make it happen. And so no matter what that looks like, whatever adversity comes your way you gotta keep trucking on because ain't no one come in to make the bed for you.”- Portia Franklin

Hear more about:

• Portia emphasizes the importance of having a supportive network, particularly her mom and a teacher who played a crucial role in her journey. Having a support system during challenging times can make a significant difference.

• Portia reflects on her experience as a single mom and her approach to dating. She acknowledges the impact of past trauma and how it influenced her views on relationships.

• The importance of continuous learning and growth. She reflects on the evolution of her parenting style, recognizing the need for personal healing and breaking generational patterns.

• Passion for empowering women and supporting children is evident throughout her journey. From running a daycare to currently leading in kids' ministry at her church, she remains dedicated to these causes.

• Commitment to disrupting toxic patterns and ensuring a healthier environment for her children. This involves recognizing the impact of past experiences and actively working towards personal and familial healing.

• The challenges of blending families and the importance of communication and apologies in overcoming obstacles.

Portia Franklin, Helping you discover your confidence to show up powerfully in your life & business

Portia Franklin in San Diego, CA

Free Womens Community Call: portiafranklin.myflodesk.com/showuppowerfullyandsparklenetworkingcall

IG: https://www.instagram.com/portia.franklin/ 

PODCAST: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sparkle-with-portia-franklin/id1596470295 

The Mindset Journal:  

https://thinkcuteboutique.com/products/think-cute-30-day-mindset-renewal-daily-journal 

Connect with us:

Instagram: @healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

Welcome to another episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast. In this episode, I am joined by Liz Abess to talk about  her personal journey as a recovering codependent, her experiences with a drug-addicted older brother, the influence of codependency on her relationships, marriage, and the subsequent journey of rediscovering herself. Liz touches on the challenges faced by families dealing with addiction , the role of denial, and the importance of recognizing and addressing codependent behaviors. We share insights  into the characteristics of codependency, its subtle manifestations, and the need for self-awareness and personal growth. Overall, the emphasis is on understanding codependency, its impact, and taking steps toward healthier, more balanced relationships.

“Somehow you need to peel back the layers. You get to the root of you. I did that with codependency with like I said, your therapy yoga God, I had to peel back myself and realize, like, what is going on? It got to where I was super controlling, super FOMO, super micromanaging. And this was after us grieving and that season of depression, because that was how I coped. And it was like relationship addiction, which they call codependency and just leaning on people needing people”- Liz ABess

Certainly! Here are the key takeaways from the previous context:

• The difficulties of living in the shadow of her drug-addicted older brother, who she adored. His overdose in his 30s had a profound effect on her, leading her to develop a pattern of fixing people to feel worthy.

• How codependency had a significant impact on Liz's relationships, including her marriage, and how it influenced her behavior and decisions.

• The challenges faced by families dealing with addiction were discussed, shedding light on the complexities and difficulties involved in such situations.

• The importance of recognizing codependent behaviors, fostering self-awareness, and acknowledging the need for change.

• The process of healing, including seeking therapy and the ongoing effort required to overcome codependency.

Learn more & sign up for my newsletter:

lizsalamyabess.com

[email protected]

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

In this new episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast, Keli Carpenter joined me to talk about her  transformative journey through meditation and various healing practices. She talks about  her journey in overcoming childhood trauma, challenging relationships, and personal struggles. Kelly's story underscores the power of self-awareness, forgiveness, and somatic healing methods in overcoming adversity and generational trauma. This episode emphasizes the importance of conscious parenting, the significance of inner work, and the potential for healing and growth, even in the face of difficult circumstances. Additionally, it underscores the impact of supportive communities and immersive retreats in facilitating profound personal transformations. 

“I really talk about mental health just from these unconscious wounds. To me, that's all it is. I know that there's many labels out there that some people really find solace in, because it's like they get seen in some of those. But in the work that I do, which is kind of this realm of trauma and consciousness and where they intersect. And ultimately, it's just this part of ourselves where we haven't felt safe or you know, this connection within to something bigger than ourselves where there's a fragment. And with that then becomes behavioral, mental, emotional and behavioral patterns, which can be then classed as rules, not to negate them, but just that's just sharing some of my thoughts around it.” - Keli Carpenter

Key takeaways:

• Impact of childhood trauma and the use of meditation to navigate these circumstances.

• Personal Healing Journey through various methods of self-discovery, including self-esteem courses, martial arts, and somatic processing.

• The importance of doing the healing work and seeking support in order to make a marriage successful, and notes that their ex-husband was not willing to do this

• The importance of addressing generational trauma and the possibility of healing, even later in life. 

• The importance of raising children who are aware of their body's needs and can listen to its messages.

• Kelly conducts immersive retreats called "Awakening Through Trauma," where participants, including her own children, engage in deep healing work, forgiveness exercises, inner child healing, and breathwork, fostering profound personal transformations.

[email protected]

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

In this new episode of the Healing and Dealing Podcast, I am joined by Celine Kheir, the founder of Saline Care Life Coaching and the author of How to Calm Your Mind. The overall emphasis of this episode is on the importance of self-awareness, self-forgiveness, and understanding one's emotions and thought patterns in the process of personal growth and overcoming challenges. Celine delves into topics such as self-love, breaking limiting beliefs, understanding the root causes of negative habits, and using emotional goals as motivation for positive change. She highlights the significance of mindfulness, self-care, and setting intentions aligned with one's emotions to create lasting transformations. The discussion addresses the challenges of procrastination and offers insights into how emotional awareness and self-compassion can be powerful tools in overcoming such hurdles. Overall, the focus is on inner transformation, self-acceptance, and the journey towards a more fulfilling and empowered life.

"Just follow your get to that state of mind where you're in the present moment where you are consciously aware of your thoughts. And you will see how your intuition, your guts, whatever you want to call it will guide you always to take the right decision and the right next step in life. It will never guide you in the wrong decision.”- Celine Kheir

In this episode, let’s talk more about:

• Recognizing the significance of understanding one's emotions, thoughts, and behavioral patterns as a foundation for personal growth.

• Forgiveness of oneself for past mistakes and cultivate self-love, acknowledging that everyone makes mistakes and learning from them is essential.

• The concept of limiting beliefs that hinder personal progress and exploring ways to challenge and overcome these beliefs.

• The importance of delving into the root causes of negative habits or behaviors, enabling individuals to address issues at their source.

• The role of mindfulness and self-care practices in promoting emotional well-being and overall personal development.

• Overcoming procrastination by understanding the underlying emotions and using emotional awareness and self-compassion as tools for motivation.

Links for Website and for Social media 

https://www.celinekheir.com/pages/home

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/celine_kheir_/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100091482481916

Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/281194654001257

P.s. my book is available on all Amazon platforms.

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

In another episode of the Healing and Dealing Podcast, Aspen Arora joins me to talk about her deeply personal and challenging life experiences, particularly her struggles with mental health, trauma, and the inadequate support she received within the military healthcare system. Aspen shares her distressing encounters during a medical evacuation and subsequent treatment in a psychiatric facility. Aspen highlights the lack of proper mental health care, understanding, and compassion within these systems. Despite her ordeal, Aspen expresses her determination to use her experiences to advocate for change, emphasizing the need for accessible healing services and a shift in societal attitudes toward pain and trauma. 

Listen and be inspired by Aspen's resilience, her mission to bring awareness to these issues, and her commitment to making a difference in the lives of others who have faced similar challenges.

There are five main themes to trauma: work, safety, power, control, intimacy, esteem, and then there's a fifth one, trust, that’s the fifth one. When those things have been violated by a trauma, especially a capital T trauma, when you enter into a new relationship, a new agreement, with that on the table, and then you're met with anything but healing, you're effectively re-traumatizing somebody and yanking in and reinforcing, already believed thoughts, feelings, behaviors, because it keeps being repeated to you. So again, this is not about wasting time, this is very much like it is unsafe.”- Aspen Arora

Here are the key points to dig in this episode:

• The Spiritual awakening, reconnecting with her spirituality and Celtic Druid roots and how spiritual journey helped her cope with the pain and darkness she experienced.

• A traumatic medical evacuation experience, the lack of proper medical attention, and feeling trapped in a nightmare.

• Challenges with the accessibility of appropriate mental health Care

• The importance of spiritual wellness and finding healing modalities that resonate personally. 

• Aspen’s experiences fueled her passion for advocacy. She expressed her mission to change the narrative around pain, promote community support, and ensure access to healing services for everyone. She aims to shed light on overlooked issues and encourage societal change.

• Healing services for veterans and active duty.

www.aspenarora.com

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast

Welcome to another episode of the Healing and Dealing Podcast. This episode is going to be exciting because my mentor, Erin Porter, is joining me today and she will talk about how she helps women  scale through trauma informed business practices, internal healing and understanding the energetics of business. She talks about childhood trauma and people-pleasing habits and how it impacts your well-being. She also talks about childhood attachment experiences and their impact on current relationships and the importance of pacing in your healing journey. She shares the value of regulating the nervous system and embracing discomfort to navigate life's challenges. She will also discuss the protector parts and its role in our well-being. The discussion also highlights the role of self-compassion, curiosity, and celebration in the healing journey, as well as the importance of doing your own inner work before helping others as a coach or guide.

“I think everybody wants to leave their source of income like really quick and like go you know, quote, unquote, go all in and like, utilize the funds that you have coming in from a full time job or a part time job to like invest back into your business to know that your nervous system safe versus like growing yourself in this fight or flight. Because then I think what happens is if things don't happen, or you know, things turn or it's not going as fast, then you get resentful, then you get frustrated, then you get overwhelmed. And it's like give yourself and your nervous system like this space that you need in order to be able to work through it. So I say like, that was a big thing to where I let myself be okay with it versus again, thinking that oh, that means I'm not you know, good enough, or that means I'm not doing or I'm not going to be successful and all that.”- Andrea Shipley

Here are the key topics discussed in this episode:

• People-pleasing habits to avoid discomfort and conflict that led to health issues and emotional struggles.

• The impact of anxious attachment style to your relationships and  recognizing the importance of pacing in your healing journey.

• Attachment therapy helps establish boundaries and understand your worth beyond achievement.

• The role of protector parts, which are defense mechanisms developed in childhood to cope with challenging situations. These parts have both gifts and distortions and need reassurance and validation to integrate effectively.

• Navigating Uncomfortable Moments by regulating the nervous system and learning to be comfortable with discomfort. 

• Learning to navigate social situations without relying on coping mechanisms like alcohol. Curiosity, celebration of achievements, and self-compassion play crucial roles in this process.

• The significance of coaches doing their own inner work. Personal growth and self-awareness are foundational for coaches to guide others effectively. 

www.quantumrippleeffect.com

www.erinnicolecoaching.com

Podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/1TstffYOGoeJrsxZ5lD9rA

Burnout to Breakthrough Book

https://a.co/d/3QHZaZE

Connect with us:

Instagram: healinganddealing.podcast

Facebook: Healing and Dealing Podcast

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Healinganddealing.podcast