Heartfelt Marriage

How do you see your marriage? How close is it to the image you had when you said, “I do”? Have you and your mate ever talked about how you want your marriage to look and feel?

It’s a challenge because two people who love each other can have disparate views of what a marriage should be. It’s not a bad thing to have differing views, but it can be a problem if you don’t know what your mate expects of you.

Dr. Ross wants to help you move your marriage from marginal to marvelous. In this podcast, he suggests some heartfelt conversations that can (should?) happen between you and your mate.

He says, “When you have such a discussion you discover what each of you wants and are willing to invest in your marriage. Then the good stuff happens!” You will love Dr. Ross’s list of “good stuff!”

This important podcast will help you discover and create a shared vision for a mutually satisfying, emotionally healthy, till-death-do-us-part kind of marriage.

This podcast lasts only 9 minutes.

Once married, emotional and real picket fences tend to box in even the most creative and life-loving couples. Suddenly or slowly, usually slowly, life gets complicated. Your world changes from being vast and interesting and colorful, to small, monotonous, and even disagreeable. You go from the joy of the wedding to the predictability and dreariness of everyday life.

How do you keep that from happening or correct it when it does?

Dr. Ross says it’s a matter of perspective. In this podcast, he shares two personal stories that make the point that we see precisely what we look for.

He also asks, is your home peaceful or angry? Do you believe tomorrow will be dark or bright? What about your daily schedule, do you see it as chaotic or orderly?

Perspective, Dr. Ross says, is what makes the difference. You’ll love this podcast because you already know that married life is darn hard to keep in the right perspective.

The podcast is 9 minutes long.

In this podcast, Dr. Ross declares, “There is no one like you on earth! You are uniquely you.”

Look around you; “average” hardly exists. There are many characteristics that make you different from everyone else: physical structure, intellectual capacities, personality expression, psychological distinctions, lifestyle preferences and much more.

Also, you are the only person who can make any significant change in what you think, the way you look, how you talk, and the way you treat others. Dr. Ross makes the point in this podcast that, if you’re not perfect yet, you still have some fixing to do, and no one can fix you except you.

No matter who you were or who you are, you can be more of the good person you really want to be. 

Dr. Ross says, “Here’s the one thing I’ve learned in my five-plus decades on earth, I’m the only person on earth who can fix me. You can’t fix me, and I can’t fix you. Wife, you can’t fix your husband and husband, you can’t fix your wife.”

All the answers to fixing your self are NOT in this podcast, but Dr. Ross does tell you where to begin. Listen till the end as he makes a special offer to you!

The podcast is 9 minutes long.

Everything demands maintenance. Your car, your house, your body, and your marriage. Your car will eventually break down if it is not maintained. Your house will become dirty, dilapidated, and unlivable if not cleaned regularly. Your body will deteriorate even faster without proper diet and exercise.

Perhaps, most importantly, your love relationship within your marriage will weaken and even fracture if not properly maintained.

In this podcast, Dr. Ross introduces a series of podcasts (chapters) that will provide you with the tools, tricks, and wisdom to keep your love relationship in tip-top-shape!

 He says, "Every husband and every wife at some time in their marriage have this relational AHA moment when they declare to themselves something like, 'If this marriage is going to be what we want it to be, it's going to take some work.'"

The podcast is 9 minutes long.

There are four ways you magnify your love relationship and rise together in love! Two of them were shared in podcast number 61. They are, delight in each other's company - become each other's very best friend, and liberate your mate -  help them get past the bad stuff of the past and become all that God wants them to be. It was Part One of chapter 17 - the final chapter of Dr. Ross's Healthy Marriage/Hurting Marriage series.

In this final podcast for the series, Dr. Ross presents two additional ways you keep love alive in your marriage and magnify your love relationship. The third way is to Forgive each other's foibles. Dr. Ross says, "Of all the gifts you can give to your mate, one of the best is the gift of forgiveness."

The fourth way may surprise you - it's something you may have never considered, so be sure to listen to the podcast all the way through.

Every love story ends with "they lived happily ever after." But this "ever after happiness" involves much more than the loving stares, beating hearts, gentle touches, and adoring words exchanged when you met that special person.

Now you're married and things have changed a little bit - sometimes a BIG bit.

Dr. Ross says, "If you've been married for longer than a week, you know it takes an effort to live together in love, to keep love alive in your marriage."

How do you maintain the thrill of each other's company after the first few days of wedding bliss wears off? How do you keep falling in love again and again and again as time goes by?

In this entertaining and helpful podcast, Dr. Ross shares four ways you can magnify your love relationship and rise together in love. This is part one of a two-part podcast. Enjoy!

The podcast is 9 minutes long.

Even the best lovers sometimes squabble. When they do, a discussion can turn into a debate and debate into a battle, and if allowed to, a battle can turn into an all-out war, and someone gets hurt. You don't want that to happen. You want to reconcile your disagreements and create an atmosphere of harmony and unconditional love.

Dr. Ross says, "A happy and healthy marriage relationship is marked by mutuality, by a commonly held determination to achieve the oneness you dreamed about when you exchanged vows."

To achieve that kind of harmony, a couple must relish in reconciliation and despise discord. The point is, reconciliation does not happen in a vacuum; you must make reconciliation a part of who you are.

In this podcast, Dr. Ross discusses what it takes to reconcile your disagreements. Have pen and paper handy to take notes as he reveals what reconciliation relies on.

The podcast is 9 minutes long.

Many husband/wife relationship problems occur, not as a result of words or deeds that happen after the wedding ceremony, but the effect of injuries that came during childhood, adolescence, and some bad choices made along the way. Some of our wounds are so deep they are hidden from our view until someone, or we identify them and seeks healing.

The good news is healing is possible! We can clean out the wounds, sew up the emotional laceration, let the cut heal. It may leave a scar, we may even be emotionally blemished, but we can still be the person God wants us to be.

What's your wound? Where do you hurt? What caused your scars? In your marriage, are you helping each other heal?

In this podcast, Dr. Ross says, "Your mate is wounded. You too have wounds. And so the mission for each of you is to help each other find healing for those wounds."

The podcast is on 9 minutes long.

One way to combat complacency is to celebrate more often, after all, who doesn't like a good party, even if it is only a 20-minute stop at the Village Inn for a cup of coffee and a slice of Apple pie (ala-mode, of course)?

Celebration is good for the soul. Life is wearisome, and praise is sporadic if at all. We need a few "at-a-boys," a frequent "you're awesome," and especially a sincere, "thank you." If you haven't done a little cheering, a little slap on the back, or a round of applause lately for the good things you do together or the kindnesses you do for each other, it's time to start again.

In this podcast Dr. Ross presences three ways celebrations grow your relationship!

He makes the point that not many things are better than a celebration, large or small, with the person (people), you love the most - your mate, children, family, and friends.

Do you and your mate laugh together? When you do, you draw closer together, the space between you diminishes, and the bonds strengthen that hold your marriage together.

If you want more laughter and fewer tears in your marriage, this podcast is for you! Dr. Ross reveals three positive habits you can nurture that will decrease the sadness of tears and increase the joy of laughter in your marriage.

The podcast is only 9 min.