In this episode #216 of Hebrew Voices, Does God Command Divorce? Part1, Lynell welcomes Dr. Nehemia Gordon for a thought-provoking discussion on the Hebrew Bible’s perspective regarding divorce—exploring whether God hates it or, in certain cases, may even require it.

I look forward to reading your comments!

PODCAST VERSION:

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Nehemia: “I hate divorce,” says the LORD God of Israel.” Again, “And I hate a man’s covering himself with violence with his garment,” says the LORD Almighty. So, the LORD God of Israel said the exact words. “I”. Say, I.

Lynell: I.

Nehemia: I love it when she does that. “Hate divorce.”

Lynell: “Hate divorce.”

Nehemia: So, God said those words. What’s the thing you always say when we do our Bible studies in the morning?

Lynell: What is it really saying, Nehemia? What does the Bible really say here?

Nehemia: In the Hebrew.

Lynell: Does it say, “I hate divorce?”

Nehemia: So, no.

Lynell: No.

Lynell: Shalom and welcome to Hebrew Voices. I’m Lynell Gordon, and I’m here with Dr. Nehemia Gordon. Today we’re going to talk about a very special topic, very special to my heart. We’re going to talk about… divorce.

Nehemia: So, we had a little bit of change of roles there, where you did the introduction instead of me. So, we’re going to shift now to the regular thing. You’ve been asking me to do this topic, and a teaching on this topic, and I’m like, I feel like I’ve taught on that like ten times, and there’s a bunch of videos out there. And why is this such an important topic for you, coming from a Christian upbringing? Because for me, from a Jewish upbringing, it’s not really a controversial topic at all. Especially for the Jewish audience listening. Can you explain to them why it’s so important for someone from a Christian background?

Lynell: Well, I can’t speak for all Christians, but I can tell you that, when I was raised, we were taught that divorce was a sin. Period. That God hated divorce, and you could never divorce no matter what happened. That, if you were being beaten, you know, you could leave your spouse temporarily. Or, you know, you could leave, but you could never be divorced because it was a sin.

Nehemia: What? That’s not true. Is that true?

Lynell: I don’t think it’s true based on the teachings.

Nehemia: No, is that true? You were… And let’s be fair, maybe you were culturally taught that. You were taught that that was doctrine.

Lynell: No, Nehemia, they taught it in church.

Nehemia: That if you’re being beaten, you’re not allowed to divorce your husband.

Lynell: No. You can leave him, though. But divorce is a sin. Unless there was adultery. Now, if there was adultery…

Nehemia: I think we need to get Gwennie involved here.

Lynell: … Shhh, out the door.

Nehemia: Can you bring Gwennie? Because, you know, Gwennie has a certain facial expression.

Lynell: And she says, “Huh?”

Nehemia: [Laughter] “Huh?”

Lynell: She makes a question. That’s exactly… She goes, “Huh?”

Nehemia: Her head’s always kind of like, tilted, “Huh?”

Lynell: She questions everything.

Nehemia: Okay. So, I want to look, today, at a Tanakh perspective. And like I said, guys, I feel like I’ve taught on this in the past, but I’m going to present it again because it’s such an important topic. Especially for folks coming from a Christian background, I guess. I think it’s probably less controversial for Jews. Well, you know what? Let’s start with the verse which makes it controversial. Let’s do that. Do you have your…

Lynell: Let me tell you some other… Let’s talk seriously about why it’s important. I think that sentence, that little bit, is not enough.

Nehemia: Okay.

Lynell: So, I’m not going to go into extreme detail, but I have many family members… when I say many… Alright. Let’s don’t say that.

Nehemia: Multiple?

Lynell: I have multiple family members who grew up with abusive husbands. And they were not allowed to leave. And they did stay, because that’s culturally what they’re taught. So, it wasn’t just me. You know, there were a lot of people that came… Now, did my father teach that, if you’re being beaten, you should stay? No, you shouldn’t stay. Should you divorce? No. You should go into counseling, do everything you can to try to keep the marriage together. I’m just going to flat out tell you I was the first person in my family, and in the history of my family’s family, that I know of, to be divorced.

Nehemia: Wait. Wait, wait, wait! Hold on a second. I… you’ve been divorced?

Lynell: [Laughter]

Nehemia: Wait. What?

Lynell: Yes, yes, I was. I was divorced for… 27 years, yeah.

Nehemia: Okay. I’m joking there because, like, I don’t know… I think probably when you first told me that it was, like, this big, like, mysterious shame thing and I’m like, “Yeah. What’s… So?”

Lynell: Oh, it’s totally. So, here’s the reason it’s so…

Nehemia: Can I be honest with you? The age that we were when we got together, if you hadn’t been married before… Look, I had people try to set me up with women who had never been married when I was in my late 30’s. And I’m like, “Why is there a 37-year-old woman who’s never been married? Probably because she has impossible standards, and that’s just trouble.” Now, I could be wrong; that’s not entirely fair.

But I think as… let’s say statistically, that’s probably right. That if there’s a woman in her late 30’s… maybe it’s different in this generation, actually, but in my generation, if you’ve never been married and you’re in your late 30’s, it’s probably because you either have impossible standards which no man can fulfill, or there’s some other kind of thing. Like, at least it’s a warning flag. So, if you’re over the age of 35 and you’ve never been married but… and you have been divorced… as opposed to what? Like, what would be worse is if you’re still married. Well, then it’s a non-starter.

Lynell: It was such a shameful thing, you know, and I thought… and I had grown up in ministry in the church, and I thought, “I’ll never be able to minister again.” And I gotta tell you, Nehemia, the church… last church that I was a member of…

Nehemia: Mm-hmm.

Lynell: You couldn’t teach, even women. Now, women could only teach women; they couldn’t teach men. But you couldn’t teach at all if you’d been divorced; at all.

Nehemia: And look, if that’s the policy…

Lynell: You weren’t allowed to be in any leadership role.

Nehemia: If that’s the policy of that church, that’s their decision, and you don’t have to be a member of that church. That’s anybody’s choice.

Lynell: It’s not a specific… That’s a denomination thing.

Nehemia: It is a denomination thing. Right. And there’s what they call a marketplace of ideas. There’s another 39,999 churches out there that you can… denominations that you can join, if you’re coming from a Christian perspective. I don’t know what percentage of those teach the same thing that you’re describing. Let’s look at the Bible, at the Tanakh, and see what it says about it. And guys…

Lynell: And I’ll just tell you, the reason that it’s important for this teaching is because I’m going to be launching a podcast for women. Men too. But for people who have really been hurt, and a lot of those people who’ve been hurt have been divorced. And I can guarantee you, if there are any that come out from the area, you know, women that come out of the area that I’m in, or even men; you know, there’s a lot of divorce shame. And that’s a problem. It’s a real problem for women who are in abusive situations, or men who are in abusive situations, you know, whether it’s emotion or whether it’s physical or whether it’s just a horrible life.

Nehemia: So, I’m not going to say there’s no shame in the Jewish world for divorce, but I feel like it’s orders of magnitude higher in the, let’s say, in the Protestant world. Let’s say that, because I guess in the Catholic world, there is no divorce. I don’t know… Alright. Guys, I’m going to give a trigger warning here. We’re going to do this teaching from a Tanakh perspective, and if you’re coming from a New Testament perspective there might be a whole bunch of verses that we’re not treating. And if you say, “Well, none of this is relevant to me because you didn’t talk about what Paul said.” That’s fair. That’s a different teaching; that’s not what we’re doing today. We’re going to talk just what the Tanakh says. If you think Paul taught something different than Malachi or… I think Malachi is quoting Yehovah of hosts. So, if you think Paul taught something different than Yehovah of hosts, or maybe God changed His mind, that’s another possibility, then… or maybe it’s just presented in a different way.

Look, I saw a video this morning that you sent me where there were two Christians debating, and the one Christian was, without going into details, he was quoting all this Old Testament stuff. And the other guy said, “I noticed there’s nothing there from the New Testament.” And the first Christian said, “Wait. Are you saying the Old Testament stuff’s not relevant anymore?” He said, “No, it’s not. Jesus came to bring a new message, and all that old stuff was just foreshadowing of stuff that was going to come later and has no more relevance.” So, that’s a debate within Christianity. It’s called, like, a supersessionism, or it’s part of supersessionism, but let’s not get into that. What does the Tanakh say?

Lynell: Well, wait a minute. You can’t do it without saying the other part. The other guy said…

Nehemia: Yeah.

Lynell: What did he say in defense of that?

Nehemia: Remind me; what did he say?

Lynell: He quoted Jesus.

Nehemia: Oh, Matthew 5:17, “I have not come to do away with one jot or one tittle of the law or the prophets.” Right. Yeah, but that was superseded then… So, let’s not get into that. That’s an internal Christian debate.

Lynell: Okay. Let’s talk about what the Bible says about divorce.

Nehemia: Let’s talk about what the Tanakh says, about divorce.

Lynell: What the Tanakh says about divorce.

Nehemia: Okay. And if you say this is incomplete, that’s a fair comment. And I’ve done teachings on the New Testament perspective, at least to the best of my understanding, more about what Jesus taught than what Paul taught. But here we’re talking about just what does the Tanakh say. And we’re going to focus on three passages, time permitting; Malachi 2:13-16, Deuteronomy 24:1-4, and then there’s an important passage in Jeremiah. I don’t know that we need to read the passage in Jeremiah; it’s 3:1-14. It’s based on Deuteronomy 24:1-4. So, if we don’t have time, we might skip that. But those are the three main passages that talk about divorce in the Tanakh.

But we’re going to start with Malachi 2 verse 16, because that’s really what brings the controversy. So, this is ironic. The irony is that Christians who want to support that God hates divorce, they don’t start with Jesus. They start with Malachi. They’re starting with the Old Testament verse, where it literally says, in quotation marks, in the… I’ll bring you here from the New International Version, the NIV from 1984… I think they came out with a new version of the NIV, so this is the ‘84 version. “‘I hate divorce,’ says the LORD God of Israel.” Again quotes, “‘And I hate a man’s covering himself with violence with his garment,’ says the LORD Almighty.” So, the LORD God of Israel said the exact words, “I,” say I.

Lynell: I.

Nehemia: I love it when she does that. “Hate divorce.”

Lynell: Hate divorce.

Nehemia: So, God said those words. What’s the thing you always say when we do our Bible studies in the morning?

Lynell: What is it really saying, Nehemia? What does the Bible really say here?

Nehemia: In the Hebrew.

Lynell: Does it say, “I hate divorce?”

Nehemia: No.

Lynell: No.

Nehemia: So, in the Hebrew… I’m going to share my screen here. Let’s see if I know how to do this… So, this is here in Accordance, and here it’s showing the… here’s Malachi 2:13-16, verse 16. It says, “‘Ki saneh shallach,’ amar Yehovah elohei Israel. “For he hates” shallach. Shallach is literally ‘sending away.’ We can go into some grammatical stuff, but really it means divorce. It’s the same word that Moses said when he said, “let my people go”. He said, “Shallach et ami ve’ya’avduni.” “Send away my people that they may serve me.” And it really it means, “set them free”. “For he hated ‘setting free.’” “‘He hated divorce,’ says Yehovah, the God of Israel.”

So, God is saying, he, whoever he is, third person, hated divorce. And then it says, and “ve’chisah chamas al-levusho”. “And he,” the same he who hated divorce, “covered his garment with hamas,” with corruption, with violence, “says Yehovah of hosts.” So, Yehovah of hosts, Yehovah, the God of Israel, said, “He,” whoever he is, “hated divorce, and he covered his garment with violence.”

Now, I think we can all agree that Yehovah didn’t cover His garment with violence, and therefore whoever covered his garment with violence is the same one who hated divorce. It’s plain as day in the Hebrew. Yet we have a whole slew of translators who put the word “I” in there, even though it says “he”. And what they’re really doing, and this is a little complicated grammatically, is, what they’re taking is, something… there’s direct speech and indirect speech. Direct speech is, Lynell says, comma, quotation mark, I love penguins. Close quotation mark… is that Penny and Gwenny behind you in the background?

Lynell: Penny and Gwenny.

Nehemia: So… or indirect speech is, Lynell says that she loves penguins. So, “that she says,” Lynell didn’t say the words “she loves penguins”, Lynell said the words, “I love penguins”. And what they’re doing here is, they’re saying, “Yehovah, the God of Israel, says that He hates divorce,” and they’re saying, “let’s just make it simpler. We’re going to take the indirect speech, “that he hates divorce”, and turn it into direct speech: “I hate divorce.” And then put it in quotation marks because indirect speech doesn’t have quotation marks. Hebrew doesn’t have quotation marks at all, but in English. The problem is that Biblical Hebrew rarely has, if at all, indirect speech. And so, when you have like, in Numbers, when Balak…

Lynell: Would you repeat that again?

Nehemia: Hebrew rarely has, if at all; it’s debatable, indirect speech. Biblical Hebrew. Modern Hebrew, of course, has it; tons. But Greek loves it, by the way. So, for example, when Balak sends messengers to Bilaam, to Balaam, the messenger says, “Thus says Balak.” And then it doesn’t say, “That he wants you to come,” because that’s indirect speech. It’s, “I.” Balak speaking is “I”. So, the messenger speaks the exact words of the sender in Biblical Hebrew. And so, when Yehovah sends His messenger, and literally Malachi, malachi, means my messenger, my angel, my messenger. And malach and messenger, angel and messenger, are the same word.

So, when it says, “Says Yehovah, God of Israel,” it’s a direct quote of “Yehovah says.” So, Yehovah says, “For he hates divorce.” Those are the words Yehovah said. “And he covered his garment with violence.” So, unless Yehovah covered His own garment with violence, which doesn’t make any sense, then Yehovah is saying there’s some third party who hates divorce. And who’s the third…

Lynell: And he explains it, right?

Nehemia: Right. Who hates divorce? It’s the man who doesn’t… who’s betraying his wife. So, three times in Malachi, chapter 2 verses 13-16, he mentions this word bagad, to betray. In verse 14, “You have betrayed her, and she is your friend,” or your companion, “the wife of your covenant.” And then in verse 15 it says, “Do not betray the wife of your youth.” And in verse 16 it says, “And be careful,” or guard your spirits, or your souls, but it’s the word ‘spirits’ literally, “and do not betray.” So, three times it mentions, “Don’t betray this woman.”

So, what does it mean to betray the woman? Well, we don’t have to guess, because the Torah tells us what it means. So, let’s look at Exodus 21. Now, Exodus 21 here has a pretty controversial passage because it talks about a man selling his daughter, and it says in the JPS, “As a slave.” The Hebrew doesn’t say as a slave, it says as an ama. Ama is a type of wife, okay? It’s Exodus 21 verses 7 through 11. So, can you read us the JPS? Just remember, when it says slave, it’s not slave, it’s ama. Ama is just a type of wife. And the selling here is the man who… he basically pays the father for the right to marry her. It’s like a right of first refusal kind of thing, but it’s actually more than that. It’s what we call in ancient Middle East, and in the Torah, mohar. Mohar is something like the bride price. So, Exodus 21, I’m going to have you read verses 7 through 11.

Lynell: “When a man sells his daughter as a slave, she shall not be freed as male slaves are. If she proves to be displeasing to her master…”

Nehemia: By the way, when it says male slaves, that’s the word eved, a completely different word. That is slave. So, she won’t be freed as avadim because she’s not an eved, she’s an ama. It’s a completely different thing. Okay.

Lynell: “If she proves to be displeasing to her master, who designated her for himself, he must let her be redeemed. He shall not have the right to sell her to outsiders, since he broke faith with her.”

Nehemia: And the word there is bagad. “He has betrayed her.” Why has he betrayed her? He paid her father. He said, “I’m going to take her as my ama,” and he decided, “You know, once the veil came off, I didn’t like the shape of her nose, or she smells funny.” Or whatever reason. His wife was nagging, his other wife, and so he’s like, “Yeah, this is too much trouble.” So, he decides, “I’m not going to marry her.” She’s not a slave. He can’t just resell her; she’s not property. He does have the right to do one other thing though, verse 9.

Lynell: “If he has designated her for his son, he shall deal with her as is the practice for free maidens.”

Nehemia: And that’s not what it says in Hebrew. It says, “As is the law,” or the judgment, “for daughters.” So, for all intents and purposes, he has to treat her as a daughter. And what that really means is, he can’t marry her off to his son and say, “I’m also going to share her.” He has to treat her like he would treat a daughter, which, that should be obvious what that means. Read Leviticus 18 if you’re not sure what that means. Alright. Verse 10.

Lynell: “If he marries another, he must not withhold from this one her food, her clothing, or conjugal rights.”

Nehemia: So, those three things are the requirements that every man has towards a wife, that you are required to provide your wife with three things… really, four, but the fourth is implied because it’s a place to live. Because literally the word divorce, as we’ll see in Deuteronomy 24, means to kick her out of the house. Send her away from the house or set her free from the house. But here, the three things are: she’erah, literally, “her meat”, meaning food; ksutah, “her covering, her clothing.” It doesn’t mean you got to buy her Gucci; and onata, which is… they translated “her conjugal rights”. We’ll use that term. It’s a euphemism, it’s… you know. Okay, all right. And then verse 11.

Lynell: “If he fails her in these three ways, she shall go free without payment.”

Nehemia: So, what was the betrayal here? The betrayal was, he promised, “I’m going to marry you.” He paid the father the bride price, and if you want to say he bought her as an ama, fine, let’s not argue about that. He paid for the right to marry her, and really, to marry her, and he didn’t fulfill his duty with those three obligations. That is a betrayal. And she’s free. The marriage is dissolved.

By the way, that’s if he already consummated the marriage. If he consummated the marriage, and one day he says, you know, “I’ve taken this pretty 18-year-old, I can no longer provide you what I was previously providing you six times a week.” She says, “Bye. I’m free.” That’s literally what the Torah says. Wow! It’s amazing. Alright. That’s not what the church teaches, right?

Lynell: No, that’s not what the church teaches.

Nehemia: That’s for an ama. What was important in our passage here is that the word bagad, to betray… I think they said lost faith, but it means to betray, is the word that describes his failure to fulfill his duty as a husband. So, when we go back to Malachi, and it says three times in Malachi, “Don’t betray her.” “You betrayed her.” “Don’t betray her.” “Don’t betray her.” What it means is he’s not fulfilling his duty as a husband. What is he doing? What he’s doing there in Malachi is… well, we have to read Malachi, the previous passage. So, the previous…

Lynell: Let’s do… 13 is really important to me, because it just…

Nehemia: Well, no. So, it actually starts before 13.

Lynell: You want to go to 10?

Nehemia: So, 13 starts, “And this is the second thing you have done.” Well, what’s the first thing he did? So, that’s in… is that verse 10?

Lynell: Yes. I think.

Nehemia: Uh, let’s see. Yeah, it starts in verse 10. That’s the first one. So, let’s read that. And it’s a bit complicated, but it has about the betrayal here.

Lynell: “Have we not all one Father? Did not one God create us? Why do we break faith with one another, profaning the covenant of our ancestors?”

Nehemia: And the word is, “Why does one man betray his brother? To desecrate the covenant of our fathers.”

Lynell: “Judah has broken faith. Abhorrent things have been done in Israel and in Jerusalem, for Judah has profaned what is holy to Yehovah, what He desires, and espoused daughters of alien gods. May Yehovah leave to him who does this no descendants dwelling in the tents of Jacob and presenting offerings to Yehovah of hosts.”

Nehemia: And look… so, the next verse, verse 13, which… we’re focusing on 13 to 16; let’s read that. It says in the JPS, “This you do as well.” And the Hebrew says, “ve’zot shenit ta’asu”. “And this is the second thing you do. You cover the altar of Yehovah with tears, crying and moaning, so that He doesn’t turn to the offering and accept a sacrifice from your hand. And you say lama.” Why? Al ma? And I paraphrase this in my Jewish American Yiddish as, “What are you kvetching about?” Al ma? Why? Like, why isn’t God accepting my offering? I brought a beautiful sacrifice! You know, they didn’t have a broken leg this time. It wasn’t blind. It was a perfect lamb, and I spilled the blood, and it sprinkled on the altar and poured it in the corner and all that stuff; all the fats are burned. Why isn’t God accepting my sacrifice? What does he say?

Lynell: I want to come back to the “tears, weeping and moaning”. When we finish the other, I want to come back there, because I feel like that’s important.

Nehemia: Okay.

Lynell: “But you ask, ‘Because of what?’ Because Yehovah is a witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you’ve broken faith.”

Nehemia: And again, “Which you have betrayed.” And in the previous passage it also said, “broken faith”, but it’s again bagad, to betray. And we saw that betrayal means, I’ve got a wife and I’m off with another woman. That’s what betrayal means. I’m not fulfilling my husbandly duties to the best of my ability.

Now, look, if there’s a man who says we used to do it six times a week. I’m now older, I can’t do six once every two weeks. That’s not betrayal. But if you’re… let’s just be… this might not be appropriate for the younger, more sensitive viewer, as they used to say on PBS. If you’re off with the other woman and you could do it a certain number of times, but now you’re like, “I can’t give it to you because I’m with her,” that’s bagad, that’s betrayal. Alright.

Lynell: “So, you have betrayed, though she is your partner and covenanted spouse.” What does it say in Hebrew?

Nehemia: “She is your friend and the wife of your covenant.”

Lynell: Your friend and the wife of your covenant. That’s sad.

Nehemia: Yeah.

Lynell: That’s really sad. “Did not the One make all, so that all remaining life-breath is His? And what does that One seek but godly folk?” Okay, that just…

Nehemia: That’s not exactly what it says. But let’s not get into that.

Lynell: Alright, so, “Be careful of your life…”

Nehemia: Yeah, the important thing is the end of the verse. It says, “Be careful of your spirit and do not betray the wife of your youth.” And then it says, “‘Because he hated divorce,’ says Yehovah of hosts, ‘and he covered his garment with violence,” or corruption, hamas, “says Yehovah of hosts.”

Lynell: Could that be sexual corruption?

Nehemia: It absolutely could.

Lynell: Okay.

Nehemia: So, the reason God destroyed the world in the flood was hamas. The world was filled with hamas, which is violence, sexual corruption… it has a broad meaning. Deception. So, what is he really doing here? What is the husband doing? How is he betraying the wife of his youth? He is betraying her by not divorcing her. He says, “Why should I divorce her? She makes such good chicken soup! She takes such good care of the kids! I’m just going to go get some on the side. I’m not going to divorce her! She’s my ama, she’s my maidservant. She’s going to do my laundry.” Which is requiring, like, beating stuff on a rock with like a… they didn’t have washing machines. So, he’s like, “I don’t want to divorce her. She’s a perfectly good wife!”

Lynell: Or maybe she’s like a sweater… his favorite sweater.

Nehemia: So, that’s a possibility as well. There’s this idea that men are very territorial and they have this attitude, and it’s a very apt attitude for what it says in verse 16. We’ll get to that. Meaning, it’s a very apt analogy. Meaning, there’s this idea that a man has a sweater, it’s his favorite sweater. He’s never going to wear it. And they say to him, “Give it to charity. Someone else will enjoy it.” “No, this is my sweater. I don’t want some other man wearing my sweater.” So, there’s this jealousy kind of idea that does exist. It’s part of maybe the male attitude. “I don’t want her, but I don’t want anybody else to be with her either.” There is that kind of attitude that, I think, is part of the male character. For many men, at least; I think most men.

Lynell: Possessiveness of their wife a little bit, maybe.

Nehemia: Or a former wife.

Lynell: A former wife. Oh!

Nehemia: Meaning, “I don’t want her. I can’t stand her, but I don’t want to know that… if there’s some other guy having her, I don’t want to know about it.” So, there is that aspect. Meaning, he wants to stay married to her because he likes some of the things she does. He just doesn’t want to fulfill the three duties. He’s like, “I’ll give you a place to stay. I’ll give you clothing and I’ll give you food, but that third thing? I’m getting that somewhere else.” That’s what the betrayal is.

So, it’s because the man hated to divorce that he’s covering his garment with violence, or with hamas, with sexual immorality. And the sexual immorality is he’s off with another woman. He’s probably, in this case, off with a foreign woman. He’s like, “She gives it to me for free.”

Lynell: And then you look back at verse 13, where it says, “You cover the altar of Yehovah with tears, weeping and moaning.” And, you know, I just can relate to that. For women or men who have been in situations that have been… I mean, it’s a very hard thing to deal with betrayal when you’re married. The type of… you know, when your husband’s with some other woman. And I went through that, and I just can so relate to this situation. I mean, in such a deep way, and I know so many women and men can.

Nehemia: Mm-hmm. Yeah, for sure. Meaning like, you’re saying the, the woman’s side of this. Because, of course, I’m a man. I’m looking at the man’s side. But you’re saying verse 13 is focusing here sort of on the woman, that… what are the tears and the moaning? Groaning is the word, anaka. It’s groaning. The tears and groaning covering the altar, those are of the woman who’s been abandoned. And this is really significant, guys. What it’s describing here is an abandoned woman. Her husband is not fulfilling his duties as a husband, which are shelter, food, clothing and conjugal relations to the best of your ability. If you’re not fulfilling those, and you’re putting those efforts towards another woman, that is bagad. That is betrayal. The Hebrew word betrayal.

By the way, there’s a little bit of a pun here as well. So, it says he covered his garment with hamas, with perversion, with sexual immorality, with violence. And then the word bagad, betrayal, also can mean clothing. But it’s a different word; it’s the word levush, which is very intentionally changing it up a little bit to create a sort of a word pun. It’s very clever. It sounds much better in Hebrew.

Well, how do we know God doesn’t actually hate divorce? Well, because He tells us what He hates in Deuteronomy 24. I feel like I’ve taught on this so many times, so maybe we’ll read through it relatively quickly. Can you read Deuteronomy 24:1-4?

Lynell: I think it’s important.

Nehemia: There is something God hates related to divorce, but it’s not divorce. Like, that’s not what He hates. What He hates is actually remarriage of a divorced woman to her original husband; that’s what He hates. That’s what He says He hates! You know, look, some people say God is all love. Okay, that’s not what the Torah says. That’s a different God. You want to create God in your own image according to your own fantasy, go ahead and do that. But that’s not what the Torah says. What does the Torah say?

Lynell: It says, “A man takes a wife and possesses her.”

Nehemia: And literally, “husbands her”, meaning he consummates the marriage.

Lynell: “She fails to please him in some way.”

Nehemia: It literally says, “she does not find favor in his eyes”. And we’ll come back to that, “for he has found in her something obnoxious,” the JPS has. The Hebrew has ervat davar, “a matter of nakedness”. Or… I’ve done a whole teaching on that; I don’t want to get into that. We will get into it a little bit. I’m going to read you some sources of how that’s been interpreted. Alright.

Lynell: “And he writes her a bill of divorcement.”

Nehemia: Right.

Lynell: A ghet, is what we call it today…

Nehemia: In modern Hebrew it’s called a ghet. That’s actually an Aramaic word. I’m sure it comes from some other language. Yeah.

Lynell: What is the word here?

Nehemia: Sefer kritut, “a document of cutting off.” So, this document isn’t for him, it’s for her. It’s so when she goes with another man, he can’t say, “She’s cheated on me. Let’s bring witnesses and have her executed. She’s living with another man as husband and wife.” And she says, “But I got this piece of parchment.” This piece of leather, actually, probably, originally. “I’ve got a document that says that you were setting me free.” And the word for divorce here is “set free.”

Lynell: Ah!

Nehemia: It says, “And he will put it in her hand,” ve’yeshilacha mibeito, “And he will set her free” or “send her away from his house.” When Noah sends out the bird, it says the same word, shilach. It’s the piel form of lishloach, to send. Shallach. The lamed is doubled in Biblical Hebrew, has a little dot in it. So, to send away, it’s to set free. Go free, little birdy. She’s being set free from his house. So, that’s the part that implies that he has to give her a place to live. Otherwise, they’re not married. There’s other passages like that, too. Alright, go on.

Lynell: “She leaves his household and becomes the wife of another man. And then this latter man rejects her. Writes her…”

Nehemia: And it says, “he hates her”.

Lynell: Oh.

Nehemia: So, the only grounds for divorce, according to verse 3, for the second husband, at least, is he hates her.

Lynell: That is profound.

Nehemia: Yeah.

Lynell: “Writes her a bill of divorcement, hands it to her, and sends her away from his house. Or the man who married her last dies. Then the first husband who divorced her shall not take her to wife again, since she has been defiled.”

Nehemia: And just to be clear, what that means is… “She has been defiled” for him. She could marry some third man, just not him. She’s defiled as far as the first husband is concerned. For his purpose.

Lynell: So, it says here, “disqualified for him”.

Nehemia: Sure. It’s literally hu tama’a. She has been defiled.

Lynell: “For that would be abhorrent.”

Nehemia: So, abhorrent means it’s something despised. So, that’s despised by God. God hates a woman who remarries her first husband after being with another man. So, God does hate a certain part of divorce but not divorce itself. What God hates is if you go back to your first husband after you’ve been married to another man. God hates that. I didn’t make that up; that’s what it says there. God said that! I mean…

Lynell: “You must not bring sin upon the land that Yehovah your God has given you as a heritage.” So, is it that He hates… He doesn’t hate the woman or the man, He hates that specific thing happening. Right?

Nehemia: He hates the remarriage… I mean, think about this. If we take it out of context, “God hates marriage.” Well, no; only marriage of a divorced woman who’s been married to a second man to go back to the first man. Well, so God doesn’t hate divorce, He hates remarriage. Only if she’s been with another man. If she hasn’t, she could remarry him 40 times. Jeremiah uses this as a metaphor, so if we really want to put the full context here, we should read Jeremiah 3:1-14.

Lynell: I just want to be real clear for everybody listening.

Nehemia: Yeah.

Lynell: So, it’s not that He hates divorce, and it’s not that He hates remarriage. He hates remarriage to the same guy you divorced after you’ve been with somebody else.

Nehemia: That’s correct. That’s what He says. That’s what it says in Deuteronomy 24:1-4. And now Jeremiah uses that as a metaphor. So, let’s read the metaphor. And this is obviously based on Deuteronomy 24:1-4. Jeremiah’s assuming that you’re familiar at least, maybe not with the exact quotation, but you’re familiar with the content. Otherwise, Jeremiah is like… Jeremiah doesn’t make any sense otherwise. It assumes that passage in Deuteronomy.

Lynell: “The word of Yehovah came to me as follows: If a man divorces his wife and she leaves him and marries another man, can he ever go back to her? Would not such a land be defiled?”

Nehemia: That’s exactly what we just read in Deuteronomy 24. It defiles the land. It’s literally… it’s a paraphrase because he uses the word chanaf instead of le’hachti. He uses a different Hebrew word, but it’s obviously based on Deuteronomy 24. Which is really interesting because there’s some secular scholars who don’t believe Moses wrote the Torah, who say Deuteronomy wasn’t written until after the exile. But obviously, Jeremiah had the scroll of Deuteronomy in front of him, or he was familiar with it. That’s clear as day. Like, just even from a purely objective perspective. Jeremiah is familiar with Deuteronomy. There’s other passages in Deuteronomy he quotes. Anyway, go on.

Lynell: “Now you have whored with many lovers. Can you return to me?”

Nehemia: Okay. By the way, we’ve talked… we did another teaching where there’s always a ma… not always, but there’s often a mashal, a parable, a metaphor, symbolic language, and the nimshal, the thing in reality it’s referring to. The mashal here is a woman who’s divorced and then wants to go back to her first husband, and now the nimshal is Israel. Israel has committed adultery; meaning, in this case, Israel has worshipped idols. And God’s like, “I’m your husband. You want to come back to me? You’ve already been with another man. You know what the Torah says.”

Alright, so now that we understand the mashal, the nimshal, the parable, and the thing in reality, let’s read verse 2 again. Or no, even that’s in… at the end of verse 1. “And you have whored with many companions,” it says, re’im rabim. “You’re going to return to me?” says Yehovah. “You weren’t just with one man; you were with many men! How can you come back to me? Don’t you know what it says in Deuteronomy?” That’s abhorrent to God. How can you come back to me? Well, okay, it’s just a metaphor. God can do whatever He wants. Alright, verse 2.

Lynell: “Look up to the bare heights and see. Where have they not lain with you? You waited for them on the roadside like a bandit in the wilderness.”

Nehemia: And can I just… can I just say something here? [Laughter]

Lynell: Yes. [Laughter]

Nehemia: So, the word for bandit here. Well, you know what? I don’t want to get in trouble. Let me… I don’t want to get in trouble here. I’m going to read another translation, so nobody says this is me. King James: “Lift up thine eyes unto the high places and see where thou hast not been lien with,” I guess it’s lying with, I don’t know. “In the ways hast thou sat for them as the Arabian in the wilderness.” And the Hebrew has the word aravi, which is really interesting.

And let’s just talk about that for a minute. Some might say, “Oh, the Bible is racist, it’s saying Arabs are bandits.” Well, so, the word arab, aravi, or arav itself, by the way, like the word evening, erev, means “to enter”. And so, the symbolism of the word evening, it comes from a symbolic understanding… maybe somebody understood it literally, I don’t know, is that the sun goes into this chamber at night. And so, erev is when the sun goes into the chamber, and so it’s evening.

Aravi is somebody who lives in the desert, or in the wilderness, and comes into the settled areas to rob and steal. So, Arab originally wasn’t an ethnic group. In this context, Arab has nothing to do with the ethnic group. It’s anybody who lives in the wilderness. There are Midianites who live in the wilderness, there are… and I’m just talking from in the Tanakh itself, there are Ishmaelites who live in the wilderness. So, it really does mean bandit; somebody who lives in the wilderness who comes into the settled areas to rob and steal. So, she goes out into the wilderness and she’s laying with these bandits. That’s the metaphor here. Alright, go on.

Lynell: “And you defiled the land with your whoring and your debauchery.”

Nehemia: Yeah.

Lynell: “And when showers were withheld and the late rains did not come, you had the brazenness of a street woman. You refused to be ashamed.”

Nehemia: Right. So, God’s punishing you with drought, and you’re like, “How dare You not give me rain, God. I’m so righteous! I brought the cakes to the Queen of Heaven!” That’s what they say later to Jeremiah. Alright.

Lynell: “You refuse to be ashamed. Just now you called to me, ‘Father, You are the companion of my youth.’”

Nehemia: And by the way, here we have what’s called a mixed metaphor. Is God the husband, or is God the father? Well, they’re both metaphors, so we don’t want to take it too literally, or then we get into really weird stuff. Okay.

Lynell: “‘Does one hate for all time? Does one rage forever?’ This is how you spoke. You did wrong and had your way.”

Nehemia: And by the way, what Israel is saying is, “God, why are you still upset with me? You’re my father! Come and love me, even though I’m worshipping all these idols. Forgive me immediately. I demand that you forgive me immediately!” And God’s like, “I’ll forgive you when I’m ready.” Alright.

Lynell: “Yehovah said to me in the days of King Josiah, ‘Have you seen what rebel Israel did, going to every high mountain and under every leafy tree and whoring there? I thought, after she’s done all these things, she’ll come back to me, but she did not come back, and her sister, faithless Judah, saw it.’”

Nehemia: And faithless is same word as we saw before, bagoda in this case, bagad, to betray. And by the way, Israel here is the northern kingdom, and Judah is the southern kingdom of the tribes of Judah and Benjamin, I guess in this time ruled by Josiah, and she’s worshiping idols.

Lynell: “I noted: Because rebel Israel had committed adultery, I cast her off and handed her…”

Nehemia: “And cast her off,” is shilachtiha, the same word as in Deuteronomy 24, shallach. “I sent her away from the house.” “I divorced her, and I gave her sefer krituteiha,” her bill of divorce, her document of cutting off, literally. But that’s what we call, like I said, in modern Hebrew, a get; Gimel-Tet. But in the Tanakh, it’s called sefer kritut, a document of divorce. Sefer is anything written, by the way, in biblical times.

Lynell: “Yet her sister, faithless Judah, was not afraid. She too went and whored. Indeed…”

Nehemia: And by the way, people have pointed out correctly that here God has two wives. Metaphorically. He divorced the first wife, and the second wife wasn’t impressed. I’m going to still keep worshipping idols and whoring, metaphorically.

Lynell: “‘Indeed, the land was defiled by her casual immorality as she committed adultery with stone and wood. And after all that, her sister, faithless Judah, did not return to me wholeheartedly, but insincerely,’ declares Yehovah. And Yehovah said to me, ‘Rebel Israel has shown herself more in the right than faithless Judah.’” Okay, what does that say in Hebrew?

Nehemia: That’s what it says.

Lynell: Alright, “Go make this proclamation toward the north and say, ‘Turn back, O rebel Israel,’ declares Yehovah. ‘I will not look on you in anger, for I am compassionate,’ declares Yehovah.”

Nehemia: And what’s compassionate here?

Lynell: Is it chesed?

Nehemia: It’s chasid. So, I’m in a relationship of chesed, of loving faithfulness. So, this is interesting. God commands us that, if you divorce your wife and she is then with another man, she can’t come back to you; that’s abhorrent. But God is allowed to take her back because it’s just a metaphor. And you could say, “God’s violating His own law!” Metaphorically, sure. But God does in other ways as well. God says, “Don’t take revenge.” But He says, “Vengeance belongs to Me.” So, He’s teaching us that here’s something we have to live by, but He can do whatever He wants.

Lynell: “I do not bear…” Sorry.

Nehemia: And there are things that are specifically preserved for Him, I mean, that are divine right that we don’t have. That’s an important point. Okay, continue. He says, “For I am a chasid,” I am chasid. I am in a relationship of faithful love, is really what chasid here translates as. Ve’lo etor le’olam, “And I don’t hold a grudge forever.”

Lynell: “‘Only recognize your sin. For you’ve transgressed against Yehovah your God and scattered your favors among strangers under every leafy tree. And you’ve not heeded me,’ declares Yehovah.”

Nehemia: And what’s the word for heeded? He says literally, “In my voice, lo sh’matem.” You didn’t shma.

Lynell: “‘Turn back, rebellious children,’ declares Yehovah, ‘since I have espoused you.’”

Nehemia: And this is a complete… this verse has two different metaphors! God’s the husband and God’s the father. They’re the children of God, Judah and Israel, but they’re also His wives. And is this some kind of perverse thing? No! It’s a mashal. It’s a metaphor. Two different metaphors. And we can put both metaphors together because we understand. We’re not stupid. We understand that these are two different metaphors.

Lynell: “I will take you from one town, and two from a clan, and bring you to Zion.”

Nehemia: So, this is the ingathering of the exiles, is what He’s describing. He’s saying, “You’re going to be punished. I’ve divorced you, but I’m going to bring you back. Unlike humans who are not allowed to take the wife back after she’s been with other men. I’m God. I’m allowed to do that, and I will do that. I promise I’ll do that.” And literally, the word here is tsion. I will bring you to Zion.

So, God’s that white colonialist Zionist, right. And I say jokingly, because “Jew” is from Judah, the indigenous people of the Land of Israel. And God’s promising, “You’re going to go into exile, but I’m going to bring you back.” And we’re back. We’re back, baby!

Lynell: [Laughter] I told Mom recently… I told her this past week, “Mom, it’s only been 50 years… you know, they’ve only had, you know, Israel is such a young country right now. You know, the new, the new…” Like, and there are still exiles everywhere, right?

Nehemia: Oh, yeah. More Jews live outside of Israel than live in Israel, and in Israel, we’re suffering persecution and oppression, obviously. Okay. So, we have Deuteronomy 24:1-4 that says God doesn’t hate divorce, He hates if the wife goes back to her first husband after being with a second husband, whether the second husband died or he divorced her. And then Jeremiah 3 uses that as a metaphor. Of course, God could do whatever He wants, but humans aren’t allowed to, which is the whole point here. God’s actually showing, “Look how merciful I am. I’m doing something even you’re not allowed to do. I can do it.”

So, it said in Deuteronomy 24, “She had been defiled.” God’s actually saying something profound. He’s saying, “I can overcome that defilement.” Wow! God’s that powerful and redeeming, and chasid. He has that much chesed, He can overcome a woman, in this case, Israel’s metaphorical defilement through idolatry. That’s amazing.

So, now let’s go back to Malachi 2. We know God’s not saying he hates divorce because there wouldn’t… would there be, could there… And here’s an assumption I have, which if you disagree with this assumption, that’s fine. But my assumption is, Deuteronomy chapter 4, verse… can you read that? Deuteronomy chapter 4 verse 2.

Lynell: “You shall not add anything to what I command you or take away anything from it. But keep the commandments of Yehovah, your God, that I enjoin upon you.”

Nehemia: And then read Deuteronomy 13:1 then. And in some versions, this is 12:32, which is quite interesting.

Lynell: “Be careful to observe only that which I adjoin upon you. Neither add to it nor take away from it.”

Nehemia: And then the very next verse talks about a false prophet who tells you to worship other gods. And there’s a principle in Jewish interpretation, which you don’t have to agree with, but this is how it’s interpreted, called juxtaposition of passages. And they ask the question, “Why does Moses say, ‘Don’t add and don’t take away?’ And the very next words are about a false prophet who tells you to worship another God?”

And the explanation is: a prophet who tells you that Yehovah has abolished certain commandments or added certain commandments is a false prophet, by definition. Even if that false prophet who’s performing signs and miracles tells you, “You know, this is no longer valid. You know what? God has a new commandment. In Deuteronomy 24 He said, ‘I don’t hate divorce, but I hate remarriage to a first husband after being with the second husband.’ But now, Malachi, I come along, and I say, ‘Yehovah told me he hates divorce.’” It’s a new message God’s never spoken before. If Malachi said that, Malachi would be a false prophet. But Malachi didn’t say that; the translators said that.

Lynell: And why did they say that, Nehemia?

Nehemia: Because they hate divorce.

Lynell: Right.

Nehemia: What’s really surprising is that the JPS says that, because there’s another interpretation in Jewish sources which actually fits what it says in Hebrew, and that is the predominant interpretation. Alright, so now let’s look at some of those sources. Let’s look at some of these… these are traditional Jewish sources. And this is the reason… why am I bringing this? Because this is the reason that, when you talk to Jews and they’re like, “Divorce? Yeah, everybody hates divorce. But it’s not… it’s not like this big controversial thing.” Okay.

Lynell: Well, unless you’re our friend who two years ago couldn’t get a ghet from her husband.

Nehemia: Ah! That’s the abandoned woman. And there’s a word for that in Hebrew, which is agunah, and agunah literally is from the word ogen, which is an anchor. So, they’re anchored women. So, that’s a woman who has a big chain around her neck, and it’s dragging her down, and she can’t now go and be married to another man because the husband hates divorce. He refuses to give her a ghet. Why? Is it because he’s with another woman? No! But he doesn’t want her to go have children with another man, who will then be the brothers and sisters of his children! That was literally the reason he didn’t want to get divorced.

So, you’re talking about, and I won’t say names, there’s this woman who we know in Israel who literally was the woman crying and groaning of Malachi chapter 2. Not because her husband was even with another man, because, by the way, Malachi 2:13-16 says, “don’t betray”, but it’s 10-12 which talks about, “he’s with another woman.” Even if he’s not with another woman and he refuses to divorce her, that is a betrayal. And we know a woman, literally, that that happened to! And literally his reason was, “If you get married, you’re young enough; you’ll have children with another man. No one else is going to wear my garment. No one else is going to wear my sweater.” That was his attitude.

Lynell: Yeah.

Nehemia: Okay, so now let’s look and see how this is interpreted in Jewish sources. Alright. So, this is very interesting. So, there’s a passage in the Talmud, in the tractate of Gittin, 90b. Guys, you can look this up in like, Sefaria. And it’s interpreting the words ki sane shallach, “for he hated divorce”, is what it literally… or “he hates divorce”. And it’s “Rabi Yehuda omer,” “Rabbi Judah says,” “im s’netach, shallach.” “If you hate her, divorce her.”

“Rabi Yochanan omer, ‘Sanui ha’meshaleach,’” “The one who divorces is hated,” meaning by God. Although he doesn’t say “by God”, but it’s implied. So, there’s two polar opposite interpretations in the Talmud. And people often say, “Well, the Talmud says…” Well, the Talmud says lots of things, and usually it’s full of debates. And here’s a debate. According to Rabbi Yehuda, what Malachi 2:16 means, “if you hate a woman, you must divorce her.” And according to Rabbi Yochanan, it means, no, “the one who divorces is hated.”

Lynell: And can we just, Nehemia… they’re talking about divorces. You said to me that that word, “send away,” I just want to reiterate, that is the same words that are used in Exodus 5:1, right? Where it says, “Let my people go?”

Nehemia: Where he says, [singing], “Oh let my people go.” Which in Hebrew is, “shallach et ami ve’ya’avduni. And the doubling of the ‘luh’ there is important. Because it’s the piel form, there’re seven conjugations in Hebrew. Qal, sholeach means “to send”. Me’shalleach, with a double lamed, is “to send away, to drive out, to set free”. When it talks about setting free a slave, it’s the same word. When it talks about setting free a woman, it’s… So, it’s “drive her out of your house,” but also “set her free.” The same word can mean “to set free” and “to drive out”.

Lynell: So why was it so important that the woman got the certificate?

Nehemia: Otherwise, if she’s with another man, she could be executed. That certificate protects her. That’s her document of separation, is literally what it’s called; sefer kritut. So, what that document does, the sefer kritut, the document of cutting off, is it’s a certificate of cutting off that means she can now be with another man, and he can’t bring a court case against her saying that she has committed adultery. Otherwise, he could say, “Wait, she committed adultery!” And there’s a term for that. And I hate to use the term, but it’s the term in old American law called the certificate of manumission. Certificate of manumission, in the context of slavery is, there’s some African American… a Black American, let’s just call it that, wandering around Virginia, and they say, “You’re obviously an escaped slave.” And he pulls out a certificate. He says, “No, this piece of paper says I’m free.” And it’s the same thing with this woman. She was married to Reuven, and then she gets divorced, and she’s now living with Shimon, and Reuven says, “She’s pregnant by Shimon. I want her executed! She was mine!” And she pulls out that piece of parchment, or leather, and says, “No, I have this sefer kritut that says I’m free to marry whoever I want.” And so, that was a very important piece of parchment or leather back then. A very important document, the sefer kritut.

Alright. So, we have a debate in the Talmud whether Malachi 2 means that, if you hate a woman, you should divorce her, or it means the person who divorces is hated. And here’s what Targum Jonathan has. This is an ancient translation of Malachi; it’s in Aramaic. It says, “arei im s’neita lah patrach.” And… which is interesting. Patar is “to set free.” “If you hate her, divorce her”, but literally “set her free”, says Yehovah, the God of Israel. So, that’s not just Rabbi Yehuda; Targum Jonathan interprets it that way.

What’s really interesting is the Septuagint. The ancient Greek translation in some manuscripts has, “But if you hate her, divorce!” It’s the imperative. If you hate, you must divorce. If you hate the woman. The Vulgate, which was translated between the years 390 to 405 by Jerome, what Christians call St. Jerome, and he’s translating from the Hebrew. He says, “When you have hatred, divorce.” So, that’s really interesting. We have this idea that, well, Christians are against divorce. Jerome’s translating from the Hebrew, and he translates, “When you have hatred, divorce.” With the imperative. And where is he getting that? He’s getting it from the Septuagint, the ancient Greek translation. And from the Hebrew. In other words, he’s interpreting the Hebrew, knowing what the Greek says.

Douay–Rheims from 1635, which is a Catholic translation! This is amazing, because the Catholic Church, to this day, forbids divorce. But in their Bible, in Malachi, it says, “If you hate someone, you should divorce her.” In the Douay-Rheims translation, English: “When thou shalt hate, dismiss.” Dismiss is a euphemism for divorce. So, even the Catholic Bible, which… the Catholics forbid divorce, but they don’t care what the Bible says. Or, they say the Bible isn’t binding, is really what they say, to be fair. They say it’s the Bible plus church tradition, and church tradition forbids divorce. But their Bible in Malachi says, “When you have hatred, divorce.”

Now, this is really cool, Lynell. The Dead Sea Scrolls… let’s back up. Targum Jonathan said, “If you hate her, divorce her.” That’s an Aramaic translation. The Hebrew doesn’t say that. The Hebrew says, “For he,” the man, “who has violence on his garment, who covered his garment with violence, hated divorce.” How did he cover his garment with violence? He hated divorce, and so he was messing around with another woman, or married another woman, or just left the woman with the inability to remarry. She’s the agunah, she’s the anchored woman, the chained woman.

Lynell: So, we have this fallacy, this “never give up attitude” when it comes to marriage. But there are times that you should, especially when your wife is your enemy, or your husband is your enemy. If you hate her, you should send her away. I just think that’s really…

Nehemia: You should set her free if you hate her, a hundred percent. And we’re going to see Jewish sources that say that explicitly.

Lynell: Like, there are situations like, you know, sunk-cost fallacy. You brought this up one time when we were talking about it.

Nehemia: What is… tell people what the sunk-cost fallacy is in economics. In common parlance, that’s throwing good money after bad money. But what does it really mean?

Lynell: It means you’ve already invested so much you can’t give up at this point…

Nehemia: Right.

Lynell: Basically.

Nehemia: That’s called the sunk-cost fallacy. So, you might think, you know, “Well, I put $100,000 into this old 2002 Honda Accord. I’m not going to give up now. I’m going to put another $100,000 in. Well, I could buy a new Honda Accord for…” I don’t even know what it costs. Let’s call it $40,000. I have literally no idea, because I’ve only ever bought two cars in my life and they’re both used. But that’s the sunk-cost fallacy. “I’m going to put more money into it, because I’ve already put so much money into it.” And in this case, if you hate the woman, you should set her free. You owe it to her, otherwise you’re betraying her!

Lynell: So, you’ve said, like, three things. Number one, like if your wife is your enemy, if you despise her, and number three, if you’re keeping her just to torment her. Like, “It’s my sweater. No one else will ever have that sweater.” You know, those are reasons for divorce.

Nehemia: Look, and it could be not that no one else will ever have her. I don’t want her to be happy.

Lynell: Oh, yeah.

Nehemia: If she goes with another man, she’ll be happy. And I’m not happy, why should she be happy? And there are millions of men out there who do not want to get divorced, for that reason. I can guarantee you of that.

Lynell: Well, there are whole organizations that have been created to help women out of situations like that, specifically because the husband won’t divorce her.

Nehemia: If the Catholic scholars of the time, of the late 15th early 16th century apparently were teaching, originally God didn’t want divorce. He hates divorce, but He allowed it as a compromise so Israelite men wouldn’t murder their wives. How else are you going to get rid of her? You’re going to go kill her. And it’s interesting because we have Henry VIII, who literally invented an entire religion, but then later wasn’t enough… he invented a whole religion, Anglicanism, in order to allow himself to get divorced, but later it wasn’t enough, so he had them executed. In some cases, probably on false charges.

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VERSES MENTIONED
Matthew 5:17-19
Malachi 2:10–16
Numbers 22
Exodus 21:7–11 
Leviticus 18:6-22
Deuteronomy 24:1–4
Jeremiah 3:1-14
Deuteronomy 4:2
Deuteronomy 12:32 (13:1 in some translations)
Talmud Gettin 90b
Exodus 5:1
Targum Jonathan Malachi 3:16
Septuagint Malachi 3:16
4Q76 Malachi 3:16
Ecclesiastes 3
Ecclesiastes 9:10
Ecclesiastes 12:13
Deuteronomy 22:13

RELATED EPISODES
Hebrew Voices Episodes

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