Hugging And Learning

In this episode we meet Jarvan! He throws flash balls, he apparates and disapparates, he can change his appearance at will — but are all these powers any match for the mopey low-self esteem of a scantily-clad blond? That's right, we're back on this bullshit. Let's see if Mattel handles this thorny issue any better than Hasbro did last week. Spoiler alert: even on Eternia, you can be not good enough to be good for nothing.

Show: He-Man and The Masters of the Universe \\ "A Friend in Need," Season 1, Episode 10

Air Date: October 17, 1983

Special Guest Star: n/a

Find it: on Hulu +Starz

Snack: Lay's Poppables BBQ

Further Reading:

• Episode Trivia Entry on IMDB
• Eternia | Wiki Grayscull
• Stairway to Heaven's backwards ode to the Occult | YouTube

What's it like to be a foster kid in the 80s? How do teenagers deal with sudden traumatic loss? Are older redheaded men preying on impressionable teen girls? None of these questions will be answered in this episode, which instead tackles the real scourge of teen girldom — low self-esteem. Want to see something truly outrageous? Join Chelsea, Andrew, Miles, Jem, The Holograms, A Salty Social Worker, but sadly NOT Rio or the Misfits, as we travel down the quickest drug spiral known to medical science, with the wettest blanket known to television.

Show: Jem (And the Holograms) \\ "Alone Again," Season 2, Episode 13

Air Date: October 20, 1987

Find it: yeah… good luck… try YouTube

Snack: Quaker Sour Cream and Onion Rice Crisps

Further Reading:

• Alone Again | Jem.Fandom.com
• An Unfortunate Episode – Jem "Alone Again"
• The Paley Center Is Saying Goodbye Its Physical Space in Beverly Hills | LA Magazine
• Jem and the Holograms: Light-Up Synergy Earrings and Illustrated Book | Amazon

Remember the "Squash It" campaign to end teen violence? Remember Chicago's infamous Vanderbilt High School? Remember how much Andy hates magic? No? Well, you're about to! Join us as we journey with the Winslow family through the world's smallest, most dangerous parking lot.

Show: FAMILY MATTERS \\ "The Gun," Season 5, Episode 16

Air Date: February 10, 1995

Special Guest Star: Freddy Prinze, Jr.

Find it: on Hulu

Snack: Kind Whole Fruit Bars

Further Reading:

• 20 Years After the Shooting on the Playground by Mary Hollis Inboden | NY Times
• LA Gun Buyback program
• Newtown Prompts Gun Buybacks, But Do They Work? | NPR
• The Squash It Campaign

Teen drinking in sitcoms has drastic effects. It turns Corey cool, Shawn violent, and somehow… Angela pays the price? Between "absolutely no effect" and "Mad-Men-level functionality" lies the truth about teens and alcohol. Will we reach it in this episode? Join us and find out!

Show: BOY MEETS WORLD \\ "If You Can't Be With the One You Love…" Season 5, Episode 18

Air Date: March 6, 1998

Find it: on Disney+

Snack: Murray's Sugar Free Vanilla Wafers

Further Reading:

• Is 18 the new 15? Today's teens drink and date less than in the 70s, study says | AJC
• SAMHSA's National Helpline

This holiday special has it all: a megafamous boy band, bad Boston accents, insane transitions, a ghost kid, live concert footage, and an almost-impossible-to-comprehend narrative style. It's KNOTB: The Edge of Reason. Join Chelsea, Andrew, Miles, Miles's personal friend Joey McIntyre, and the rest of the Bean Town Posse for a cool ride through the Yuletide.

Show: The New Kids on the Block Animated Christmas Special

Air Date: December 14, 1990

Special Guest Star: All the New Kids! (kinda)

Find it: at the Paley Center or on YouTube

Snack: Trader Joe's Ginger Snowballs

Further Reading:

• "New Kids on the Block" Christmas Special | IMDB
• New Kids on the Block | Wikipedia
• New Kids on the Block drop '80s Baby' video with behind-the-scenes look at The Mixtape Tour | Entertainment Weekly

'Tis the season to be re-watching our favorite holiday movies. You know, the ones we remember so fondly from childhood about Santa and his pet immortal lioness, his abduction by fairies, his tangles Gandalf, etc. No? Not ringing a (jingle) bell? Join Chelsea and Andrew as we make our merry way through the last (and best!) of the Rankin/Bass stop-motion animation Christmas specials.

Show: "The Life and Adventures of Santa Claus" Rankin/Bass Animagic Christmas Special

Air Date: December 17,1985

Find it: on AMC

Snack: Oreo Cookie Holiday House

Further Reading:

• The Life and Adventures of Santa Clause | Wikipedia

When Roseanne finds the alleged pot stash of her daughter's-live-in-boyfriend-except-her-daughter-moved-out, Chelsea and Andrew have more questions than just "what is this relationship even?" Do we inevitably turn into our parents, or were we never as cool as we remember being? Just how potent is 20-year-old toilet pot? Join us for an exploration of all these topics, and a whole lot of Laurie Metcalf fangirling.

Show: SHOW NAME \\ "ep name," Season #, Episode #

Air Date: October 5, 1993

Special Guest Star: Paul Feig

Find it: on Amazon Prime Video (included)

Snack: Milk Chocolate Caramel Crunch Medallions from Trader Joe's

Further Reading:

• Roseanne | Wikipedia
• On a "very special" Roseanne, The Most Lethal Substance is Nostalgia | The AV Club
• 'Roseanne': Catch up on the saga of Darlene and David before Johnny Galecki's return | USA Today
• Dissect Podcast

What happens if you join a cult, and then find out that it's a scam? Do you turn the con artists into the authorities? Expose them as frauds? Try to get compensation for all their past victims? HEY HEY HEY — NO! You enact some sitcom justice with the help of a Broadway Star and a lot of what we sure hope isn't pesticide. Join us as we probe the dark corners of a nature-based cult and the giant curves of a 70s bald cap.

Show: WHAT'S HAPPENING!! \\ "Rerun Sees the Light," Season 2, Episode 18

Air Date: February 11, 1978

Find it: on Sony Crackle

Snack: Hershey's Hot Cocoa Kisses

Further Reading:

• 31 Things You Might Not Know About What's Happening!! | Mental Floss
• Warning Signs | Cult Education Institute
• Rerun on the Gong Show

Must-See TV? We'll be the judges of that. The Thanksgiving episodes of FRIENDS are legendary, and this is one of the most memorable of them all. But… does it have anything to teach us today? Besides the fact that we never deserved Phoebe Buffay? Put on your turkey-eating pants and let's dive into this smorgasbord together. *clap*clap*clap*clap*

Show: FRIENDS \\ "The One With the Rumor," Season 8, Episode 9

Air Date: November 22, 2001

Special Guest Star: Brad Pitt

Find it: on Netflix

Snack: Trader Joe's Apple Cranberry Tart

Further Reading:

• A Definitive Ranking of Friends Thanksgiving Episodes | Vulture
• Intersex 101 | InterAct Advocates
• Native American Heritage Month

Feeling a little too cocky in 1970s Chicago? There's nothing like an STI scare and a lecture on sexual health from Jay Leno to put you in your place. Join Chelsea, Andy, and the cast of GOOD TIMES as we confront the stigma around STI testing and treatment, in as much detail as Standards & Practices will allow.

Show: GOOD TIMES \\ "JJ In Trouble" Season 3, Episode 21

Air Date: February 3, 1976

Special Guest Star: Jay Leno

Find it: on Starz, or Hulu + Starz

Snack: Butterfinger Peanut Butter Cups

Further Reading:

• Minors' Consent Laws for HIV and STD Services | CDC
• Why the STD Epidemic in America Is About to Get A Lot Worse | The Daily Beast
• 10 Things You Might Not Know About Good Times | Mental Floss
• The National Association of Free and Charitable Clinics