Hunter, Jessica & Cush

Welp. It's another Wednesday. Welcome to another "live performance" from Governor McMaster. A few weeks ago, McMaster got #testingbeforeturkey trending. Well, he's back. And today he dropped a new hashtag. We apparently have a Skooz issue. Skooz is a complicated issue. Skooz is such an issue that there is Skooz punishment. Don't wanna Skooz, you could lose your Skooz license. #Skooz

Stepping into another week of The Bachelorette. The gang (West Ashley in the house!) rambles on about the new Candy Cane Cookies from Trader Joe's. They are called Jo Jo's. As in JoJo is now hosting The Bachelorette. Hunter has been growing to accept that he retains enough information that may sound like he can talk to smart people, but can't hang. Kerry is drunk most days on Kombucha. Cush had a birthday. We all hate Bennett. And this episode of The Bachelorette was very revealing (yeah Ben & Blake). We also end the show with Hunter's misunderstanding of anything that Kerry said. (Tinnitus Table of 1). This leads to new show words "interwinein" and "gushnuts" which Hunter thought was some sort of goji fruit that Kerry uses to keep her gut flora in perfect check.

2020. Did you have a drunk Sylvester the Squirrel in your 2020 bingo card? No? I am not gonna apologize for my various depths or lengths on inebriation. Hell, even the animals know you gotta be buzzed to deal. So Sylvester got into some pears. Well, they were fermented. So what's wrong with tippin' 'em back? My little nut leans Fat Joe all the way back. It's the one super power Hunter has. Leaning back at 50 degree angle while blasted. We also discuss how Kombucha and how we believe our podcast partner Kombucha Kerry may not be worried about her "gut flora" and just may be drunk squirrel most days...

Welcome to Totally Dysfunctional Theater. Christmas Vacation. We welcome the vocal talents of Kerry (we still don't know he ACTUAL title). We reenact the iconic Aunt Bethany and Uncle Lewis scene. Our favorite burn of all time "You couldn't hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerine plant." Merry Christmas Vacation.

Who thought this week would bring soooo much drama? It seemed to be a simple enough plan, Grab some Publix fried chicken, whip up some arugula salad and watch some Tayshia. Apparently, Cush fell asleep. Hunter was worried... like stress cleaned worried that something happened to Cush, Nope. Cush was sleeping. We also discovered that Cush & Hunter know Kerry's job title. Hunter is loyal to a point that when he cares, he will clean your house. We also have no issue with the term "smoke show" and that Noah (in his best Top Gun Goose like moustache) played the game well. We are about to get some "grown ass men" up in here.

Cush & Hunter are celebrating Christmas in the Lowcountry. We have tickets to the Holiday Festival of Lights with Totally Dysfunctional Theater. The Island of Misfit Toys. All you need is little Charlie in the Box.

Nothing brings people closer together in the most awkward of ways than "Tiny Couch Interviews" We squeeze in with the guys of Old Dominion. Of course we couldn't get out of this without meowing. It really is cathartic. Things get awkward as Cush wastes Old Dominion's time and Hunter works through life by quoting OD songs and lyrics. Also, we think we went WAY over our time, (you can hear the "wrap it up" beeps) but OD and we didn't seem to mind and neither did we.

Welp. Tonight is the night. We are most likely saying goodbye to “the oldest Bachelorette.” Big night. Kerry has news about Dale’s former modeling job for Party City. And well we need dinner for this evening. A healthy salad seems like a smart choice (Hunter & Cush smashed some Publix fried chicken at lunch) so a request for Arugula was made on the group text. And that is where Cush gets burned.

We are facing the most important decision of our lives. "MEHLection" 2020. We sent our imbibing correspondent Jessica Chandler to the North Charleston Chili's to bring you complete "MEHLection 2020" coverage. Hanahan in da' house. Drink 'em if you got 'em!

Over the weekend legendary Sean Connery passed at 90. Everyone has their favorite Sean Connery movie. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, James Bond, Highlander The Rock. Hunter & Cush pay tribute to Sean by reading a group text from The Bachelorette and the confusion that surrounds a Taco Bell order. Cush (not known for celebrity voices) nails his first Sean Connery and will inevitably repeat said Sean in the hallways from this day forward. RIP Sean Connery.