Dave Brown has his own Tales of the City. 

Join us for episode #11 of Secret Son as we discuss coming out in the 70s, implicit memory and meeting inebriated relatives for the first time. 

Thanks for listening!

I  am a domestic adoptee born in Virginia, raised in San Diego, CA, and have lived in the San Francisco Bay Area most of my adult life. I have a Bachelor's in Business Management and am a retiree from the University of California.

Three and a half years ago, I decided to take a DNA to find answers to shake off the shroud of secrecy. I found what I was looking for, but I was also unprepared for the upheaval in my life.

I created My Refocused Life to document my journey, never anticipated how much I would change. https://www.facebook.com/myrefocusedlife

I wrote this three years ago when I first saw my birth parents' pictures.
A Mirror Man is someone with mirrored-self mis-identification, i.e., unable to recognize themself in a mirror. 

As a teen, I would spend much time looking at myself in the bathroom mirror, not because I was a budding narcissist, but because I didn't recognize myself. 
I realize it is because I didn't see my parents in me. 

It was the same for my adoptive brother; we both felt like we had Martian DNA, although he fits in more than I did. I was the dorky kid who was merely tolerated.
I didn't have kids, so I didn't experience the sensations and wonders of adoptee friends who had kids. I hadn't thought about it until I heard other adoptees talk about how huge that was to see themselves reflected in their children.

Seeing the pictures of my birth parents for the first time made an emotional and physiological impact. Seeing myself reflected in them and vice versa hit me like a tsunami. 

I looked just like my father and had a resemblance to my mother. They were both beautiful. 

I noticed the facial features, the mouth, the shape, and the color of the eyes. But what got me is that my birth father and I stand the same way, his head tilted to the right as mine. I had always hated that aspect of myself. Now I think it's cool.
 

This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice.



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