💬 Let’s keep the conversation going!

Follow @illstartpodcast on Instagram and Facebook for behind-the-scenes moments, listener reflections, and episode updates.

Together, we share, listen, and connect.

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One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences.

Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

In this special I'll Start episode, Heather, Morgan, and Fred address a topic that has surfaced across multiple stories this season: suicidal thoughts, stigma, and the myths that keep people suffering in silence.

With clinical insight, biblical context, and compassionate honesty, this conversation is designed to support both those who have struggled with these thoughts and those who love someone who has. We name common myths, clarify when to seek urgent help, and remind listeners that their life has value, even when the pain feels unbearable.

This episode is educational, pastoral, and grounded in care. You are not alone.

What We Cover in This Episode

    •    Why suicidal thoughts are more common than people realize

Myth-Busting & Biblical Context

Several biblical figures openly expressed despair, exhaustion, and a desire for life to end. Scripture does not hide these moments, and God does not meet them with condemnation.

Examples referenced in the episode:

    •    Elijah:

“He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. ‘I have had enough, Lord,’ he said. ‘Take my life.’”

1 Kings 19:4 (NIV)

    •    Moses:

“I cannot carry all these people by myself; the burden is too heavy for me. If this is how you are going to treat me, please go ahead and kill me.”

Numbers 11:14–15 (NIV)

    •    Jonah:

“Now, Lord, take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live.”

Jonah 4:3 (NIV)

    •    Job:

Job curses the day of his birth and gives voice to profound suffering and despair.

Job 3

    •    Jeremiah:

“Why did I ever come out of the womb to see trouble and sorrow and to end my days in shame?”

Jeremiah 20:18 (see also Jeremiah 15)

    •    David:

Several psalms end in darkness and unresolved pain, reminding us that faith and despair often coexist.

The “Unforgivable Sin” (Clarified)

When Jesus speaks about the “unforgivable sin,” He is addressing religious leaders who were knowingly and deliberately rejecting the work of the Holy Spirit, not people in emotional pain or crisis.

    •    Matthew 12:31 (NIV)

“And so I tell you, every kind of sin and slander can be forgiven, but blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven.”

Key takeaway:

Additional Resource Mentioned

We’ll be taking a brief holiday break and will return January 6 with another brave story and thoughtful discussion.

Have a safe, restful, and hope-filled holiday season. Your story matters. Your life matters. And we’re walking with you.

Follow @illstartpodcast on Instagram and Facebook for behind-the-scenes moments, listener reflections, and episode updates.

Together, we share, listen, and connect.

X: @illstartpodcast

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences.

Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

In this week’s episode of I’ll Start, Victoria shares her story of depression, anxiety, and the quiet belief that she is a burden. A season of college transition left her feeling disconnected from friends, failing classes, and stuck in a cycle of numbness, panic, and loneliness. On the outside she kept showing up, but on the inside she wondered if anyone saw her, or if she even mattered to God.

One night in church, a sermon left her feeling exposed instead of comforted. As she tried to slip out unseen, a woman stopped her to pray and spoke specific words of truth that confronted the lies in her mind, “You are seen. You are loved. Do not give up.” After Victoria’s story, Heather talks about attachment ruptures, how loneliness and broken connection can register as danger in the brain, and why that can create a perfect storm of depression, panic, and withdrawal. Morgan reflects on how we often transfer our experiences with people onto God, what Scripture says about truth setting us free, and the courage it takes to let ourselves be truly seen in community.

Key Takeaways

💬 Let’s keep the conversation going!

Follow @illstartpodcast on Instagram and Facebook for behind-the-scenes moments, listener reflections, and episode updates.

Together, we share, listen, and connect.

X: @illstartpodcast

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences.

Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

In this week’s episode of I’ll Start, Adam shares his honest story of anxiety, depression, loss, and the pressure to “hold it together” when life comes apart. What began as childhood fear became a quiet companion in adulthood, and a miscarriage brought every unspoken worry to the surface. As a pastor, Adam felt the weight of being strong for everyone else while silently unraveling inside.

After his story, Heather unpacks how fear and grief live in the body—and why naming our experience is a crucial step toward relief. Morgan reflects on the “why, God?” moments of faith and reminds us that God meets us in our honesty, not in our performance.

Key Takeaways

• Childhood fear often resurfaces in adulthood when life hits hard

💬 Let’s keep the conversation going!

Follow @illstartpodcast on Instagram and Facebook for behind-the-scenes moments, listener reflections, and episode updates.

Together, we share, listen, and connect.

X: @illstartpodcast

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences.

Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

In this episode of I’ll Start, Hannah shares what it’s like to live inside a mind that won’t turn off. From childhood panic attacks to compulsions that made everyday moments like church, Target runs, and dinners with friends feel impossible, she names the shame, fear, and exhaustion of living with OCD. Heather unpacks radical acceptance and the Both/And mindset—learning to say, “This is hard, and I’m not alone.” Morgan reflects on Psalm 34:18 and reminds us that God is close to the brokenhearted, even when the struggle doesn’t go away.

Key Takeaways:

    •    Radical acceptance asks us to name our pain as the starting point for growth.

💬 Let’s keep the conversation going!

Follow @illstartpodcast on Instagram and Facebook for behind-the-scenes moments, listener reflections, and new episode updates.

Together, we share, listen, and connect.

X: @illstartpodcast

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences.

Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

In the Season 2 premiere of I’ll Start, Dustin shares his honest journey through addiction, recovery, and faith. A high-school injury led to years of alcoholism and secrecy, but connection and grace changed everything. Heather unpacks shame resilience—the mental-health tool that helps us move from hiding to healing—while Morgan reflects on Psalm 40 and reminds us that confession is for our hearts, not God’s memory.

Key Takeaways:

• Shame cannot survive empathy.

• Healing begins in safe, judgment-free connection.

• God meets us in the pit and lifts us out.

💬 Let’s keep the conversation going!

Follow @illstartpodcast on Instagram and Facebook for behind-the-scenes moments, listener reflections, and new episode updates.

Together, we share, listen, and connect.

X: @illstartpodcast

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences.

Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

We’re back! Season 2 of I’ll Start launches October 21! Join Heather, Morgan, and Fred as they share what’s ahead: more stories of mental health and faith, honest conversations about courage and healing, and a reminder that your story matters.

This sneak peek dives into what it means to integrate Scripture and psychology, to hold both faith and evidence-based tools with integrity, and to build a bridge where hope lives in both. If you’ve ever heard “you just need to pray harder” or “mental health struggles mean weak faith,” this season is for you.

What to look for this season:

Season 2 premieres October 21.

Connect With Us:

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences.

Each episode of “I’ll Start” highlights a personal story of mental health challenge, endurance, and hope. At the end of each episode, you will receive mental health tools and theological truth from our Co-hosts, Morgan Arseneau and Heather Kaloupek. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

In this Season 1 finale of I’ll Start, Heather, Morgan, and Fred sit down—this time with all three mics on—to reflect on how the podcast began, what they’ve learned, and what happened behind the scenes.

They answer listener questions, talk about when it’s time to seek help, and share how faith and vulnerability shaped the season. It’s honest, hopeful, and the perfect way to close out Season 1.

If you’re struggling with depression, you’re not alone. Here are some trusted resources that can offer support, guidance, and hope;

Crisis Support & Hotlines:

Faith-Based Support:

Therapy & Mental Health Resources:

You don’t have to do this alone. If you’re struggling, please reach out to a trusted friend, pastor, or therapist. You are not meant to carry this burden by yourself—there are people who care and want to support you. Asking for help is a brave and powerful step toward healing.

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

This is Brian's story.

What happens when the version of success you were chasing no longer works? In this vulnerable episode, Brian shares how a season of depression led to a deeper, more honest version of his calling. As a young man in ministry, Brian wanted to be the hero—but over time, he discovered that connection comes not from perfection, but from shared struggle.

This episode explores how pride can keep us isolated, how vulnerability builds connection, and what it means to surrender to God’s voice in the quiet.

Themes:

Pride, vulnerability, depression, ministry, mental health, calling, faith, identity, healing, connection

Key Resources & Reflections:

    •    Isaiah 30:15 – “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength…”

    •    Psalm 46:10 – “Be still and know that I am God.”

    •    Conversation around defense mechanisms, emotional avoidance, and the difference between connection and performance

    •    Reflection on the spiritual formation that happens in seasons of struggle

    •    Prompt for listeners: Where do you connect more with the struggler or the hero?

We want to hear from you!

Connect With Us:

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.

This is Stephanie's story.

Stephanie’s story begins in the overwhelm of early marriage, new motherhood, and the crushing pressure to hold it all together. From the outside, she seemed steady. Inside, she was unraveling.

In this episode of I’ll Start, Stephanie opens up about the hidden battles behind perfectionism, the guilt and rage that surfaced in parenting, and the slow, faithful path toward healing.

This story is for anyone who’s ever hit their limit and wondered: Could this also be a turning point?

In this episode, we explore:

Resources Mentioned:

Reflection Prompt:

We want to hear from you!

Connect With Us:

One of the most difficult parts of mental health struggle is feeling alone. Shame, fear, and stigma keep us isolated and reinforce the belief I am the only one  who struggles with mental health. When someone shares their struggle with us, suddenly we have hope. Even when pain is present, there is something so healing about being in community. How do we build a community in the middle of our struggle? 

Someone needs to start the conversation. 

Most of the time we are hoping someone else will be the one to do it. What if we stopped waiting on others and told our story. What if we said, “I’ll start.” “I’ll Start” is a podcast where individuals bravely share their stories, listen with compassion, and connect through their faith and mental health experiences. 

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, call 9-8-8 to speak to a professional 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You are not alone.