Insane Erik Lane’s Stupid World

Would you pay upward of $1,000 to go to a Bridgerton Ball only to be served Kit-Kats & raw chicken, then be "entertained" by a cheap pole dancer? Some folks in Detroit did! A gas leak can creative an explosive situation...especially if it's methane gas...in a sewer...under high pressure. For 2 decades a fake doctor in Thailand helped men "enlarge" themselves using his self-taught "knowledge" from the age of 14. All without a license & on just a 9th Grade education.

Is a passenger on a delayed airline a victim of theft or just an exploiter of viral videos? You decide. When dining in a Mexican restaurant with a jukebox, you'd better be sure you pick the right song, especially if you aren't a Mexican. If an "Arkansas Credit Card" is really a siphoning hose used to suck gas from another vehicle, what is an "Arkansas Adoption"? It will probably involve beer & go down in a campground. It's midweek madness, packed with stupidity!

One would think that living in China, a zoo would be stupid to try & dupe the locals into thinking painted chow-chows were pandas. You would be wrong. It looks like I'm going to be around a lot longer than I thought. I'll let you know when I'm going to die with the results from new data in the Death Clock. A Syrian man thought he had a head cold...but turns out his HEAD was letting his brain ooze out through his nose.

Some people really get into fantasy sports but not as much as this one dude who instantly became an international terrorist. If you've gone looking for treasure in a dumpster, you know you could find almost anything--but what about an SUV? it's the fall season & the apples are ready for picking. And some folks are picking up on an Internet craze, searching for Saskatchewan purple apples...that don't exist. Another midweek of stupidity to get you to the weekend!

What's more fun than a wedding reception? A cat fight that breaks out between the single women over the wedding bouquet! There's a cat fight of a different kind in Springfield, OH and the Haitians there think it sounds appetizing. In Japan, they're not cooking cats, they're admiring them on calendars. But it's not just the cat...it's the cat's "cajones". The fur really flies this week with my Insane FL Nephew, "Pancho Guero"!

You know things are bad when people have high anxiety about dropping a deuce at work. So, there's a new company policy. Be careful sniffing candles at dollar stores...you never know if someone needed to do #1. What's worse than your arm or leg "falling asleep"? It's when you have "dead butt syndrome" from sitting too long.

The botox craze is now becoming something more than cosmetic...it's becoming necessary to help relieve pressure. How do Canadians do a wild road trip? With Taco Bell & a bear. Fall season is in the air & so is pumpkin spice! The PSL has moved beyond that hot, caffeinated beverage that is in nearly everyone's hands when the weather gets chilly. Now cats have it in their litter boxes.

You can find all sorts of cheap & klitchy on Temu, like home furnishing that you can eat. There's nowhere to go but down when you're trapped in an aircraft with a passenger who has explosive diarrhea. Having a stuffy nose is such a discomfort, especially when it's been stuffed with a little plastic building block for the past 25 years. There's plenty of stupidity here to get you through the middle of the week!

If you're having brain surgery, you don't want to have it on the same day that the surgeon brings his 13-y/o daughter to work. It's back-to-school & the teachers are already stressed. Just like one pre-K teacher who snapped & puts a 3-y/o in a head-lock between her legs. Chinese women are getting cosmetic surgery to "even out" the corners of their eyes--except when the doctor stitches your eye shut.

If you think you would be successful selling ice to Eskimos, you might go for this new shtick: Selling sunlight from a mirrored satellite. Fans of the WWE wrestling may have an appetite for the "World Gravy Wrestling Championship." Can you fly as "checked baggage"? One FL man may not be wrapped too tight thinks so...but he is wrapped pretty tight in shrink wrap waiting to be tagged at the terminal.