In which Sabbath Malek, business secretary, reflects on his good fortune and the PM senses the Chancellor, Aarush Bhatt, is being lined up as his successor.

What a change in fortunes for several well-connected members of the elite are experiencing and no amount of excuses, smooth talking and affluent society contacts are going to help! But Crispin Dunk, society columnist, is riding high.

In which two politically elite families suffer from idiots within: Somerset jaunts off to Greece before the air-bridge is secured and Al Shrove disses her nearest and dearest on TikTok and YouTube.

In which Steve Cannon reflects on the political shenanigans of his time as PM, his luck in marrying Alex and the future of his family in a post-Brexit, post-Covid world.

In which the PM applies his new policy of ‘whack-a-mole’ on the unsuspecting City of Leicester and Trump buys up the world’s stock of one of Covid’s key therapeutics.

In which Prince Rupert cowers in the face of his wife’s anger over her BFF’s betrayal and Benedict Morgan’s campaign of reforming Whitehall gets into full swing.

In which the fresh-faced secretary of state for housing gets involved in a housing application scandal, Trump flexes his muscles unsuccessfully and the new Labour leader’s muscularity – both physically and metaphorically - is proven.

In which the Home Secretary has a meeting with Benedict Morgan to discuss the latest issues.

In which our pair of tracker and tracers have a heated debate and Uel Fudge gets axed.

The Secretary of State for Health finds himself alone at the Friday coronavirus briefing trying to explain the 40 000 death toll.