Intelligence Check

It's time! Time to take on the Vampire Lord Baron Von Uberdorf! Time to save Tor's daughter and prevent her transformation into one of the Baron's minions. Time for our adventurers to almost certainly get their asses handed to them. But first, they decide to focus on smashing a couple coffins. Because we haven't waited long enough for this fight! And although the Baron may be soft-spoken, it turns out you do not want to mess with his furniture! 

When the Baron decides he's had enough of their intrusion it does not go well for the party. Rath almost explodes from one of the Baron's vicious attacks. Seriously. He barely avoids a hit so hard, it would have probably turned him into a pile of goo. Kort brings an elephant to the party. Blag gets to live out one of his favorite monster fight fantasies. And Tor does what he does best and changes everything.

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Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

After patting themselves on the back to celebrate all the danger they heroically ran away from, our adventurers ready themselves to confront the Baron and rescue Tor's daughter. They heal up and confer with the vampire hunter they just saved for any pro tips. But the last time this guy went against the Baron he ended up as a zombie. So, he may not be the best resource. Maybe the Baron isn't all that he's been hyped up to be though. He's probably got some stereotypical bad guy voice just to seem tougher than he really is.

As the party enters the final chamber, will the Baron mind the interruption? How will he feel about these guys going through all his stuff? Will the party try diplomacy or just start throwing hammers? And will Rath be able to stop Kort from saying something they might all regret? It's time to confront a Vampire Lord! 

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Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

Last episode we left our adventurers in a room with a creature that may or may not be a dwarf child. As I was sitting here thinking of how best to describe the party's imminent destruction, I did what any professional episode describer does and got distracted by the internet. There I found an article about D&D enemies that appear weak, but are really nasty. Interesting, especially given the situation our team finds themselves in! But then, I saw the image they tagged on to it. A glorious squirrel wielding an axe and a shield, riding through a battlefield on a frog. Now they had my full attention!

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Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

As our adventurers continue their quest to save Tor's daughter from the clutches of the vampire Baron Von Uberdorf, you just have to admire the artistry with which he has created this gauntlet of creepiness. Clearly he has a passion for dungeon design! First the hedge maze to even get to his manor was just crawling with undead encounters. Then he had that giant collection of treasure guarded by a freaking mummy. And now this mausoleum, where every turn leads to another twisted terror. Each new room is basically an 80's metal band album cover. Hopefully Rath is taking notes for his dungeon business, because he's getting one heck of a free lesson here. 

Wasn't the Baron trying to take over the world? Something about traveling around and starting vampire outbreaks? Sure, he's probably immortal, but who has the time for opening global vampire franchises and so much dungeon planning? It makes you question what you do with your time if he can pull all this off. He's got plots and schemes, a giant house complete with hell hounds, a healthy social life, and dudes with heads that pop off when they become awful bat creatures. And here we are just playing Dungeons & Dragons.

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Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

Looking for a fun get away with your adventuring friends? Journey through your local shuffling horde of zombies to a mausoleum today! Don't know where to find your closest oddly large underground burial chamber? Just free the spirit of a ghost held in butler servitude for directions! Once there, please don't wake the guard, he's very sleepy after a long day of doing horrible, horrible things. Just step gingerly around the piles of body parts. But watch your step! You haven't signed a waiver, and the floors are slippery. As you venture further, be sure to say "hi" to our attentive heads of staff. They just want to show you how much we love having you here.

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Join the party members and other listeners on Discord discord.gg/H3fhhA7, Reddit www.reddit.com/r/IntelligenceCheck/, and Facebook www.facebook.com/intelligencecheck . Email us at [email protected]

Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

Time is running out to save Tor's daughter. Having barely pried Kort out of the siren's magical grasp, the team has approached the ghostly Butler Rempfer, desperate for any assistance they can get. It turns out he is willing to help the team locate the baron, and even point them to a powerful weapon to help defeat him. But the Butler has one condition, they return his heart to his body so that he can be free to rest in peace. He's probably sick of cleaning bathrooms. If Blag is any indication, shifters like the Houndmaster eat some gross stuff. So it's off to find a heart! Having recently visited the lab of the mad scientist Von Leachtenstein, our adventurers think they have a good idea where to start their search!

Deciding to make the most of their limited time, our adventures split up, once again violating that super basic D&D rule. Rath heads off to complete the Butler's mission, while the others go to finally raid the treasury. And that's the part where things really just all go to hell. Will the team find what they need to defeat the sinister baron? Will their lust for magical items get them in to yet another ridiculous situation? Why does Kort keep looking down his pants? And will someone please see if that crying baby is okay? They probably just want their mummy!

Have you seen our merchandise featuring designs from friend of the show kevvart? Check out all the awesome apparel, stickers and so much more at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc . And be sure to check out more of his work on instagram @kevvart!

Are you enjoying the show? Please help us grow and tell someone about it!

Join the party members and other listeners on Discord discord.gg/H3fhhA7, Reddit www.reddit.com/r/IntelligenceCheck/, and Facebook www.facebook.com/intelligencecheck . Email us at [email protected]

Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

This episode the bard tries to seduce someone. It doesn't go well.

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Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

Episode 50! A major milestone! The kind of event people who make podcasts would generally celebrate with a special episode. Something well thought out in advance. But if you've listened this far, you know making plans isn't exactly one of these guys' strengths in game. Why would it be any different out of game?

Speaking of making plans, that's actually something our adventurers try to do this episode. And some of their ideas are actually reasonable. Dare we say almost even intelligent? You might be saying to yourself, "that's not the party I know!". Fear not listeners. In the end it all devolves back down to brash action and rash choices. But hey, at least we're 50 episodes in and the bard hasn't tried to seduce someone.

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Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

Having finally reached the manor of the vampire Baron Von Uberdorf, our adventurers have somehow charmed their way inside and been given free rein. With a couple very important restrictions that are just asking to be ignored by the team. Showing surprising restraint, they begin their exploration of the grounds in search of Tor's daughter.

Coming across an unexpected guest of the Baron's, Kort and Rath try out a new routine we're calling Two Fine Fellows Foppishly Frolic with Frivolous Frankensteinian Flair. It's fairly fascinating.

Speaking of flair, we're excited to announce that we now have merchandise available featuring designs from friend of the show kevvart! Check out all the awesome apparel, stickers and so much more at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc . And be sure to check out more of his work on instagram @kevvart!

Are you enjoying the show? Please help us grow and tell someone about it!

Join the party members and other listeners on Discord discord.gg/H3fhhA7, Reddit www.reddit.com/r/IntelligenceCheck/, and Facebook www.facebook.com/intelligencecheck . Email us at [email protected]

Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer

Things are getting desperate for our adventurers as they continue their journey through the perilous hedge maze of Baron Von Uberdorf. Knowing their destination can't be far, they venture on, pursued by the obnoxious heavy breathing, and that wraith that at this point is really just being a jerk.

Can the party survive this gauntlet? Will Rath be undone by a terrifying new threat that he should have seen coming? Will Kort finally use his heroic moment? Will one of the adventurers wind up as dead as the puns the players try to resurrect? As things heat up, let's hope they can push their luck, and their foes, just a little more.

Thank you for listening to this podcast! We don't pay to advertise the show, so we are always incredibly appreciative of your help in spreading awareness. Please tell friends about the show and join us on discord! We know there are a lot of actual play shows out there, and we are truly grateful that you have chosen to spend your time listening to and supporting Intelligence Check!

Join the party members and other listeners on Discord discord.gg/H3fhhA7, Reddit www.reddit.com/r/IntelligenceCheck/, and Facebook www.facebook.com/intelligencecheck . Email us at [email protected]

Want to help support us? First off, you're wonderful if so! Merchandise is available at tee.pub/lic/18PfY6FQeuc and you can contribute to equipment and hosting costs at https://ko-fi.com/intelligencecheck !

Theme song by Jet 'n' Joby

Logo designed by Ed Rempfer