Interstates & Heartbreak

This week on Interstates & Heartbreak, conflict resolution coach and Enneagram specialist Jenn Whitmer is here to provide an upgrade from your typical Buzzfeed personality quizzes. She guides us through the nuances of the nine Enneagram types at their healthiest and most pathological, identifies their corresponding love language, and reveals wihch personality is most likely to fall victim to the vices of lust, greed, and beyond. Our interview also reveals my type's unexpected propensity for deception, and reveals why I'm more likely to cry during a commercial than IRL.

To access Jenn's coaching resources, find her social links, or sign up for a free session : jennwhitmer.com

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

The first episode of the year features OKCupid success stories Megan Ladd and Will Rippetoe, returning for a joint episode! They share the anatomy of a good profile, what went into crafting their own OKCupid profiles, and what actually proved effective in attracting each other. We then dive into the creation of my own profile, which leads to debate over whether it's appropriate to compare myself to Kobe, questioning how weird is TOO weird in a partner, and the realization that I may be a golddigger. This episode is the perfect motivation for anyone who resolved to get back on the apps or revamp their dating game in the new year. Alternatively, those entering 2021 with a partner can enjoy some renewed gratitude through the knowledge that the copious struggles of online dating are now behind you.

For corporate career advice, inspiration for your next dating app pick-up line, or to simply level up your marketing lingo : @willrippetoe

For tangible advice around how to successfully lean into your instincts, particularly as it comes to forging your career path : @megladd

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

This year I wrap up Interstates & Heartbreak the way many of us spent our quarantines - alone. For my first ever solo episode, I take time to reflect - not on the horror that was 2020, but on ghosts of New Year's resolutions past taken straight from my 8th and 9th grade diaries. Take a listen for insight into the non-relationships that eventually shaped my relationship philosophy, insecurities around inexperience, and the crush that inspired one particularly "stupid and shallow" resolution.

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

'Tis the season for an episode of Interstates & Heartbreak that delves into the challenges that arise when two faiths intersect, including the impact on holiday merriment and traditions. "Relationship Rabbi" Judy Greenfeld of the Nachshon Minyan congregation in Los Angeles shares the guidance that she provides interfatih couples through all stages of their relationship. Judy shares insight around all of the potential questions that may come up when entering an interfaith relationship. How early is too early to address religious differences? When is it right for one partner to convert to the other's faith? How can we cope if their parents don't accept my religion? And do I need to make my children choose between chocolate gelt and candy canes?

To learn more about Judy's congregation : nachshonminyan.org

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

I interview Anna Goodman (aka Kevin from the Backstreet Butches, aka Dandy Frank) about growing up queer in Ohio and her eventual L-Word inspired move to LA. She shares how her now extensive network within the queer LA community essentially grew out of a DM slide at age 19 and solo nights out in West Hollywood. We address preconceived notions about the lesbian community, including incestuous friend groups and what people on Tinder really want when they say they’re “looking for a third.” Finally, we dive into the highs and lows of the dating apps, and get Anna’s (and my) honest reactions to personal ads.

For a peek into Anna's life (and her Dandy Frank alter ego), find her on Instagram : @annargoods

If you're looking for a way to virtually connect with the queer community in Los Angeles, check out @jqinternational and @opendykenight

To see Kevin's contoured abs in full boyband action, check out : @backstreetbutches

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

This week Interstates goes international with Sydney native Kylie Tran, as we discuss her dating experiences during the time she spent in Berlin. She explains how fuckboys vary by continent, and how the European men she encountered compared to the stereotypes of their respective homelands. In diving into her dating history, she reveals her tendency to remain friends with exes, a particularly troubled fuckboy who perpetually lingers in her DMs,  moving in with a boyfriend one month into dating, and the lessons to be learned from these men and more.

For the ultimate food and travel porn, along with the occasional dog, find Kylie on Instagram : @kylieyeah

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

This week I interview author Julie Glynn about the voice in your head that tells you you're a "fugly slut" - your inner mean girl. We discuss how to combat her negativity, whether she's mentally cockblocking you from pursuing the relationship you deserve, or convincing you that you shouldn't join the Mathletes because it would be social suicide. From there, we identify ways that this toxicity manifests itself IRL, in the form of bullies, frenemies, and unsupportive partners, aad how to cut out all of the poison from those relationships. Finally, we debate which famous mean girl deserves the title of Queen Bee.

To order a copy of If My Ass Were Smaller, Life Would Be Perfect - And Other Lies the Mean Girl in Your Head tells you : julieglynn.com

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

This week I interview the co-hosts of Dope Sh*t My Therapist Says podcast, Lauren Fractor and Ryanne Gatti. This episode addresses the ways we let dating impact our mental health - like pressuring ourselves to maintain a cool girl façade, or saying yes to dates you’re lukewarm about because “this could be the one.” Lauren and Ryanne dish out tangible, concrete advice about moving on from your ex, and reveal why you’re probably better off severing ties and blocking them on social. And for anyone seeking external support with their internal health, they offer professional insights into how to go about finding a therapist who meets your needs, plus affordable resources to make the financial commitment less daunting. 

For self care in the form of affirmations and validation for all your therapeutic indulgences : @dopeshttherapypod

To hear more dope shit from the perspective of two practicing therapists : Dope Sh*t My Therapist Says podcast

Or email them directly at: [email protected]

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

I interview Alina Tang about coming into your own while you're on your own, discussing the transition from serial monogamy to the dating apps. We reflect on the challenge of balancing your partner with your own needs and interests, and ponder how to maintain the best version of yourself even while you're in a relationship. We end the episode with a game of red flag or dealbreaker that debates the very red flags that exes have helped us identify and avoid. 

To hear more of Alina's poignant takes on dating and relationships, check out Alina's Medium page

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope

This week, Jonathan Hernandez and I commiserate about the inherent biases built into the online dating process, discussing how external factors like perceptions about race or height preferences can serve to limit your options on the app. Jonathan reveals the one fate worse than the friend zone, and shares his tactics for escaping. Finally, we dive into how to keep romance alive in spite of the difficulties of dating during quarantine.

To hear Jonathan talk about pro NBA players shooting THEIR shot, check him out on The Lakers Legacy Podcast on:

Apple Podcasts, Twitter, and YouTube

To make things Instagram official : @interstatesandheartbreak

For dating commentary from my inner Carrie : interstatesandheartbreak.com

For any questions, business inquiries, or love letters : [email protected]

For a glimpse into my life when I'm not talking about dating : @lesliegnope