Is This a Thing?

Special thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for the use of our logo.

BONUS RANT #3: Akshat's Lawyer

It's a Thursday, and that means BONUS CONTENT!

This week on the podcast we had discussed winning the lottery, and what each of us would do with our pile of money. Akshat's was a lawyer that could help him:

• Cancel plans with people
• Deal with annoying family members
• Kill off anyone who found out about his money

If Akshat's Prius has a sunroof, don't say a goddamn word. Do enjoy listening to his rant though!

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special Thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for our logo!

Episode 19 of the Is This A Thing Podcast!

"Robo Lotto Black Friday 4000"

Potential Things This week: 

• Soda Water Update: A "new manager type" gets all up in Marc's cup.  
• Naming Your Car: All good names come about organically. Or come at the flip of a quarter and roll of a D6.
• The Lottery: A tax on idiots. Like Akshat, apparently. Although apparently we're the idiots for thinking so.
• Black Friday: This one's from the archives of two Thanksgivings ago. Support America. Support Black Friday.

Feliz Cinco de Mayo! On this holiday we celebrate many potential things. First, we get an update about the riveting Soda Water Controversy from Episode 18. A new manager gets a little over zealous. Then, we think about Car Names. Believe it or not, the film Herbie Fully Loaded actually covers the death of car personalities (and names) surprisingly well. Akshat then argues about the Lottery. He's not stupid for buying a ticket. You're stupid for telling him not to buy one. Finally we finish with one from the vaults on Black Friday and Thanksgiving. Thanks for listening!

"Just one word. Crankfest?"

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special Thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for our logo!

Episode 18 of this Is This A Thing Podcast!

"Crime! From Chipotle to the Cemetery"

Potential Things This week: 

• Soda Water: Does asking for a cup for water cover the carbonation? Is it a crime? Do I owe them two pennies for the bubbles? 
• 90 Degree Back-Ins: Cocky assholes making Akshat wait a couple minutes for their fancy parking jobs. Who do they think they are? Elevator riders?
• Cemeteries: Hotbeds for crime. But only from 8pm-8am. Let me mourn my nana during the day. Also let me buy some dank weed at night. (A great listener question)

It's Episode 18 of the Is This a Thing Podcast! We start by discussing Soda Water. Does my free cup of water entitle me to some CO2? It definitely entitles me to ALL THEIR LEMONS. Then Akshat brings up 90 Degree Back-Ins. Spoiler alert: he hates them. He also discovers his own cognitive dissonance. Finally, Annie from Minneapolis by way of Pennsylvania tells us of Crime Cemeteries. At night? Crime time. During the day? Prime time (to mourn your loved ones).

"Stop doing lines off that headstone!"

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special Thanks to @TaylorHigs for the logo!

Episode 17 of this Is This A Thing Podcast!

"Elevators - A Love Story"

Potential Things This week: 

• Incentives for Designated Drivers: You can't argue against this unless you're the devil. Also, if our ideas go into place get ready for everyone to be the DJ they've always wanted. All it takes is not drinking! 
• Wearing the Same Clothes Every Day: What are your co-workers going to say? Even if they call you out, just gaslight them. And then make them question their existence and life choices. It's like a get out of jail free card. Specifically: hygiene jail. 
• Riding the Elevator: Haters gon' hate, Akshat gon' ride the goddamn elevator.  

It's Episode 17 of the Is This A Thing Podcast! We start by discussing the saddest game in the world. It's a treat, it's a story, it's the meaning of life. Pavlo's life, specifically. We then move on to whether Akshat can buy fountain pens for exotic websites. Here we discover a wonderful truth: we'd all be friends with college-Dan. We then move on to deciding what wonderful incentives there should be for designated drivers. Answer? DJ Sets! DJ Sets for every sober driver! When Podcasts can be elected, this is what we'll campaign on. We also discuss wearing the same clothes to work everyday. It's not every episode that we advocate gaslighting and emotionally confusing your coworkers, because we edit that out every episode. We end on a wonderful listener question, calling out one of the hosts for their questionable behavior and disregard for society! I know what you're thinking - and it's actually not Dan! Wow! 

"Swish"

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for creating our logo!

Episode 16 of the Is This a Thing? Podcast!

"Hot Tony Goes to the Movies (Alone)"

Starring: Marc, Akshat, and Dan

Potential Things this week:  

• Bathroom Graffiti: Don't look away from your phone while you're in public restrooms. Unless you're going to write "Hot Tony" on the wall.
• The Stupid Dan Show: Like the Truman Show, but about Dan. Also stupid.
• Astrology: Dan insults his friends for a few minutes while Marc and Akshat laugh at him.
• Going to Movies Alone: Who has the time to go to movies alone? Depressing people. That's who. Are you the old man watching Up by himself and weeping? Way to make everyone sad, guy.

Episode 16 starts with bathroom graffiti. Everyone wants to be a bathroom comedian. Hint: no one is. Except that one guy who wrote "Hot Tony" on the bathroom wall. But he's probably a comedy professor at Harvard by now. Then Dan talks about his worst nightmare: being dumb. (Nobody tell him). He takes a stab at debunking astrology before giving up. (See?) We then debate going to movies alone. The only way to do this and not be creepy? Bring a clipboard.

"I don't want to kill him. But if I was going to, I'd drown him."

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special thanks to Taylor Higgins (@TaylorHiggs) for our logo! 

Episode 15 of the Is This a Thing? Podcast!

"Operation Slap 'n Tickle"

Starring: Marc, Akshat, and Dan

Potential Things this week:  

• Movie Trailers: Sure this is a nuanced topic. But you know how we can solve it? By relying on our nation's true warriors. The ones that lead us out of darkness. The brave souls who show us the true way to freedom. We speak of the Film Students.  
• Supporting Things: Listen to us weave a web of cynicism that is both useless, and baseless. Also, nothing matters and everything is terrible. 
• Taxis: The best thing to come out of the demise of taxis and the rise of Uber and other unmarked taxi services, is the occasionally experiencing the first half of getting carjacked by drunk people. 

It's Episode 15 of the Is This A Thing Podcast! This week, we discuss whether movie trailers are a thing. It's a heated discussion, touching on Proust. Seriously, Proust. No, for real go listen, we talk about Proust. We then move on to supporting things with money. Have you ever wanted to heard Dan accosted for his beliefs by two belligerent, sad and cynical people? Well want no longer you can hear it all in this episode. Finally, we discuss taxis,  which we (along with the rest of the world) have nothing but contempt for. Instead, we all like Uber, especially when people assume you are their uber ride, and accost you, and you pretend to put on a brave face and drive away, and then cry a little and call your mother. It's a week of fun! A week of mystery! A week of praising Film Students! Hey come on, be nice. They need a break from bringing people coffee and making a frame with their fingers and looking through it all the time. 

"Roger Mr. President. Operation Clown Farts is go. Godspeed men." 

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for the Bonus Rant logo!

BONUS RANT #2

It's a Thursday, and that means BONUS CONTENT!

This week, We discuss the game "5 Items or Less", where you try to freak out a cashier with 5 random items. Such items include:

• Condoms
• More Condoms
• Lube
• Bigger Condoms

Our most creative and inspired conversation yet! Thanks for listening!

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for designing our logo!

Episode 14 of the Is This a Thing? Podcast!

"Hello? Is it Pork Rinds You're Looking For?"

Starring: Marc, Akshat, and Dan

Potential Things this week:  

• Not Knowing the Proper Aisle: Should you be embarrassed if you can't find an item at a store? Whether you're looking for pork rinds or LED light bulbs, you're in the wrong aisle. The right aisle is at  www.amazon.com.
• Cigarette Bans: Don't ever smoke indoors, but let the smokers kill themselves in peace. Or at least on public sidewalks.
• Cellphone Speakers: Please don't play music/podcasts from your cellphone speakers in public. Or even in your home, if you can help it.
• ITAT Etiquette Police: Who you gonna call when people are being terrible in public? ITAT! We'll be there with our bright pink Kevlar and tasers.

We start off Episode 14 by talking about the secretly uncouth Lionel Richie music video Hello. Then we talk about that embarrassing moment when you can't find what you're looking for in a store. What's embarrassing? You didn't order it online. Then we have a sad, tired discussion about smoking bans. Just leave smokers alone! They didn't CHOOSE to smoke! Finally, we get a listener question from Chris in Minneapolis. Listening to music through cellphone speakers in public. Is that a thing? No. But don't confront them, unless you want to get stabbed.

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for our St. Paddy's logo!

Episode 13 of the Is This a Thing? Podcast!

"Multidimensional Dog Buffet"

Starring: Marc, Akshat, and Dan

Potential Things this week:  

• Newscasters on Television: We're not sure there's a concrete answer to whether real newscasters should be allowed in fictional universes. We do know that we'd like Larry King in all fictional universes, playing all the roles.  
• Buffets: Forget every opinion you had, because you've been living in a Ivory Tower, going to buffet after buffet and getting fat on chinese food and judgement. 
• General Tso' Pizza: The good idea train keeps rolling. Yes, we've applied for a McArthur Genius Grant. No, they won't return our calls.  
• Facebook Page for Pets: Having a Facebook page is what separated us from the animals. It's the most human act outside of differentiating between a salad fork and a regular fork.  

It's Episode 13 of the Is This A Thing Podcast! We discuss whether it should be okay to have real newscasters in fictional TV Shows and movies. Is it a difference in approach? Is it that we want Larry King to play all the roles in the next Mission Impossible? You'll find out! We then move to Dan's controversial hatred of buffets. Like with most things, Dan's solution is bread lines for the poor. We also come up with the most amazing food of all time: Chinese pizza! The possibilities are as endless as the diarrhea is sure to be! Please give us money. Finally, we have another listener question: is it a thing to make a Facebook page for your pet? We know what you're thinking, and the answer is yes: it would be great if cars sent really hyper sexual tweets to their owners. We're all on the same page here.  

Special thanks to Fletcher Magellan for our new theme song, "Oh, No!" off his upcoming album. Listen to it, and other singles like it on his Soundcloud.

Special Thanks to Taylor Higgins (@taylorhigs) for our logo!

Episode 12 of the Is This a Thing? Podcast!

"Open Source Popcorn Soup"

Starring: Marc, Akshat, and Dan

Potential Things this week:  

• Pound Town: We propose a trip to our significant others. No one accepts.
• Soylent: A solution to food for people who think food is a problem.
• Movie Theater Popcorn: Trash food for trash people that makes too much goddamn noise while I'm trying to figure out who the Gone Girl is.
• Food Noise: We diagnose Akshat with Misophonia. The only cure is isolation.
• Soup: Too hard to eat properly? Yes. 

In Open Source Popcorn Soup, we discuss Soylent, a food-alternative that fixes the problems of buying and preparing and eating food. Who has those problems? Marc has those problems. Next, listen to Dan's vendetta against movie theater popcorn! The only good use of your popcorn is to keep people away from your seat. Later, we discover that Akshat has been living with Misophonia for his entire life. You can literally hear the repression! Finally, Soup comes up again, and remains just as controversial as it did the first time.